Chapter 55 : Life
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I’ve got life
you’re always on my mind
you gotta believe in something, alright…
I grimaced, as I felt something wet drop on my face.
“Sirius, you better stop drooling on me, it’s disgusting, and I’m not into that kind of stuff…” I muttered, elbowing him hard in the ribs.
“It’s not me,” Sirius mumbled back, burying his face into the pillow.
“What the fu—“ I began, sitting up.
I gazed up at the ceiling of the tent, stunned.
“Sirius,” I said with a growl. “The bloody tent is leaking!”
“Well, good thing it didn’t rain—“
“IT BLOODY WELL DID RAIN!” I roared, shoving away the soaking wet blankets as a proof. “How come you didn’t notice this!?”
Now it was Sirius’ turn to sit up with a huff. “Oh, you’re actually blaming me, are you? For the rain!?”
“For being a heavy sleeper, you dolt!” I complained, giving his shoulder a slap.
“Well, so are you, idiot,” Sirius said, the corner of his mouth twitching. “Come on, you’re not actually mad, are you, Quency?” he murmured, leaning closer.
“Don’t,” I warned him, as he wiggled his eyebrows. “Don’t even think about it, Black!” I laughed, as I backed away from him. He let out a ridiculously playful growl, as he crawled closer. “Don’t do it!”
“Do what?” he said, his face now inches away. “This?” he whispered, kissing my cheek. “Or… this?” Sirius continued, and moved his lips to mine.
“Sirius…” I laughed against his lips, totally giving up.
“Oi Quency, we really ought to—“ came Snape’s sudden voice from the tent door as he popped his head in.
It was at that exact moment when all three of us let out a mortified “OH MY GOD, WHAT THE HELL!?”, and Sirius lost his balance, falling heavily on top of me and making me knee him… well, in the worst place you could possibly knee a man.
I shoved Sirius away – who oddly enough remained on the ground, looking extremely wounded as he clutched his manhood, or what was left of it – and stumbled up on my feet, trying to collect myself.
“SNAPE, GET THE FUCK OUT!” I screamed. And without even giving him a chance to ‘get the fuck out’, I did the first thing that popped to my mind.
I punched him.
”Oh my God,” came Lily’s stunned voice when the three of us – me, Sirius and Snape – walked in through the double-doors to the Entrance Hall. “What happened?”
I glanced at the two boys sulking behind me, both of them looking terrible. Sirius was still a little bent over, and hissed at each step he took. Snape, on the other hand, had a black eye, and a swollen lip.
I looked back at Lily, my expression grave. I gave a small shrug, and shoved my hands in my pockets, just as James and Remus came barrelling down the marble staircase. “Don’t know, don’t care.”
“Well, hello, how did—“ James began, but fell silent as he took in the state of his best friend and enemy. “What the hell happened, got mauled by a troll, eh?”
“Quency,” both Sirius and Snape chorused, and for once, their tone was equally filled with deep hatred.
Atleast in Sirius’ case it would be temporary.
“Innocent until proven otherwise,” I said at once, glaring at my shoes.
“The two victims standing behind you are telling us otherwise,” Remus pointed out.
I rolled my eyes, and brushed past them.
“Quidditch practice in five minutes, Padfoot,” I heard James say. “Wanna come with, Quency?” he called, followed by a disapproving growl from Sirius.
“I’m tired,” I muttered, and left a stunned group behind me.
As I arrived to the dorm, I was expecting to see it empty, so that I could get some sleep. Instead, to my great surprise, I found Sienna sitting on my bed with Vicky and Val sitting opposite of her, looking totally awkward.
“Ah, there you are!” Sienna greeted, giving me a piercing look. “I’ve been waiting for ages!”
“I’m sorry, she just—“ Vicky began, and I could tell by her tone that she did not like Sienna.
Apparently, two people that are so much alike don’t necessary get along well.
“Sienna?” I said, blinking rapidly. “What the fuck are you doing here!?”
“She came to see you,” Val said, as she tugged on Vicky’s sleeve. “And we need to go… to that thing, remember?”
“What thing?” Vicky demanded, as Val dragged her out.
“That thing!” I heard Val say, before the door closed behind them.
“Sienna, why are you here?” I sighed, throwing my robes on the floor as I walked to the bathroom.
“I know this is a bad timing for you,” Sienna began carefully, as I grabbed my toothbrush and started to brush my teeth furiously.
“What?” I managed to say, as I popped my head out to see Sienna’s expression.
“The thing is…” Sienna began, and I leaned over the sink to spit. “That I’m…” she said slowly, as I grabbed the cup to wash my mouth. “I’m pregnant, Susie.”
I almost choked on the water, but luckily managed to spit it out in time. I didn’t even bother to wipe my mouth, as I barrelled back to the room, staring at Sienna with my eyes wide.
“What? You’re what!?”
“Pregnant,” Sienna said, avoiding my eyes.
“Since when?” I demanded.
“Well, I found out right before your… your… your accident,” Sienna mumbled, her hands shaking.
“And you didn’t tell me?” I shot, my shock turning into anger.
“The time wasn’t right!” she said defensively. “And it still isn’t, but you were bound to find out – sooner or later! I wanted to tell you myself before you found out some other way, like from mama or... or whatever!”
“Why would I—“
“Because that’s how you found out about Ali, right?” Sienna said, looking sad. “There was a rumour, right? And I didn’t want this to be like that, I wanted to tell you myself, because… because…”
“Aww, come on, Nan!” I said, giving a shrill laugh. ”Spit it out, you’ve never had difficulties to put your opinions to words!”
“Because I love you, Susie!” she said loudly, giving me a teary smile. “I realized something recently…”
“What?” I said, gaping at her.
“I realized, that you’re the only sister I have, and I’ve spent most of my lifetime to make your life a living hell, when I should’ve been there for you, protecting you… you’re the only sister I have ever had, and ever will have – and I’m sorry I’ve been such a bitch.”
I stared at her. This was all too much; first she goes all bonkers about loving me, then she gives me an Oscars-worthy speech about me being her only sister she has, and… well, it was just too much.
“Are you drunk?” I demanded eventually.
“Cut the sarcasm, Susan,” she snapped, and I closed my mouth slowly.
“You’re making it incredibly difficult,” I noted, as I started to rummage through my trunk to distract myself.
“What do you mean?” Sienna demanded, and I heard her get up from the bed, and walk towards me.
I straightened up, and turned to face her.
Merlin, she was tall!
“You don’t even like kids, Sienna!” I said loud and clear. “You didn’t even like them when you were one yourself, remember!?”
Sienna gave me the faintest smile, before shaking her head. “That was you, Susie…”
I blinked at her, before realizing she was right.
“Well…” I said, biting my lip. “Kids are dirty – you hate dirt!”
“Why are you being like this?” Sienna demanded, folding her arms. “Why are you so against this, Soozer?”
“I’m not against it!” I snorted, pushing past her. “I just…”
“Just WHAT?” Sienna said.
“I’m just not supporting it!” I said, organizing my books blindly.
I felt Sienna watch my every move, until she finally cut in. She shoved the books from my grip, and forced me to look at her. “Does this have anything to do with your accident?”
I stared at her, my eyes narrowed. “You don’t even know what you’re getting yourself into, Sienna.”
“I do,” Sienna said quickly, her eyes wide and sincere. “For once in my life, I know exactly what I’m getting into, and for once in my life, I know what I want – and this is what I want, Susie!”
I remained quiet, as I watched the emotions flicker across her face. For once, Sienna looked different. For once, she didn’t look like the bitch I was familiar to picture her as.
To my shock, she looked like a loving mother.
“Does mama know?” I asked quietly, clearing my throat awkwardly.
“Yes,” Sienna whispered. “Dad, too.”
I looked away at the mention of dad, and felt an uncomfortable lump in my throat. “Good, then.”
“So… so you’re okay with this?”
“If you’re sure,” I said, and met her bright eyes again. “Which I see you are…”
“Good,” Sienna sighed, and relief crossed her pointy face. “Because I have another request, too.”
“What?” I said, raising my brows suspiciously.
“I want you to be the godmother.”
I stared at the poster in the Common Room, my arms crossed, and head slightly tilted. The poster was hard to miss; it was bright red – reminded me of the communist party – with gold, sparkling letters, and a very pompous looking picture of the Marauders.
Annual Gryffindor Victory Party
in the Common Room!
I jumped and looked at the person next to me. It was Pettigrew – and he looked like hell. His hair looked dirty, and pointed in every direction – and not in a good way, like Sirius or Potter’s hair. His eyes were bloodshot, and dark circles framed them.
I tilted my head to the side as I took in his appearance. Both of us seemed to realize it at the same time, because we both cleared our throats awkwardly, and turned to gaze at the poster again.
“A bit arrogant, if you ask me,” I muttered quietly. “You know, announcing a victory party before the game…”
“Yeah, but then again, we’ve always won,” Peter said, nodding confidently. “Every year.”
“And you think we’ll win this year, too?” I asked in disbelief.
The silence that fell between us was more of an answer than any words in the entire world.
“Exactly,” I said at last. “Well, I gotta—“
“D’you have a date, then?” he asked so fast I could barely make out the words that came from his mouth.
“What?” I said, staring at him.
“To the party,” Peter said more slowly this time. “Do you have a date to the party?”
I continued to stare at him, before snapping out of it. I blinked rapidly, and looked at the poster again. An uncomfortable feeling rumbled in my stomach, as I bit my lip nervously.
“Um, Pettigrew…” I began, scratching my neck.
“I understand,” he breathed quickly, already backing away. “You don’t fancy me, I understand…”
“That’s not it!” I said quickly, before cursing under my breath. “Fuck! Well, that’s exactly it, but—“
“I said I understand!” he called out. “I just thought, well, when Sirius said—“
“What did Sirius say?” I demanded, not caring how menacing I looked.
“He said you didn’t like him, and—“
I watched the annoyance flicker across his face, before he made a gesture to run off.
By now, I was aware of everyone in the Common Room staring at me. Someone made their way through the crowd, and soon enough, Evans stood there, staring at me with wide eyes, as Sirius – dressed in his Quidditch robes - appeared next to me.
“What’s going on?” Sirius asked, his eyes flickering between me and Pettigrew.
“Oh, fuck off, Sirius!” I snapped, and stomped out from the Common Room.
“SUSAN!” Sirius called, but I ignored him.
“SOD OFF!” I called over my shoulder.
“YOU – STOP – RIGHT – THERE!” Sirius said, as he took a hold of my arm, twirling me around.
My fist reacted like on its own will, and flung at his face. Sirius stumbled back, holding his nose as he let out a yelp. I watched with wide eyes – slightly shocked – when I saw blood dripping from his nose. But as soon as I met Sirius’ eyes, the anger was back again.
“WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR!?” Sirius managed to get out.
“Where do you get off telling people I don’t like you, huh!?” I hissed. “I told you I would say those words when I was ready, and yet you go around telling people I don’t like you!? You’re a real asshole, Sirius!”
Sirius stared at me for a moment, before something crossed his face; astonishment.
“Peter…” he breathed, and closed his eyes as if in relief. “Merlin, Susie, I can explain—“
“See if I care!” I said, shaking my head. “If you wished to hear those words from me, Black,” I said, pursing my lips tightly. “You can just stop wishing, because there’s no chance in hell that I will say them to you!”
I marched away, ignoring him as he called after me.
I needed to kick someone’s ass.
“CHUCK!” I roared, glaring up to the sky.
“Oi, Perry!” I heard James holler, and I watched as two silhouettes flew closer. “Wotcher, Quency!” he said, as he landed in front of me, Chuck right behind him.
“Shut the fuck up, Potter,” I growled, and pushed him aside.
“Susie, what’s—“ Chuck began with a frown, but it was too late for him to react, as he watched me raise my fist and punch him. “OI!” he cried out, staggering.
“OI, QUENCY!” James joined in, trying to restrain me.
“LET GO OF ME, POTTER, IF YOU DON’T WANT TO BREAK YOUR NOSE!” I roared, wrestling against his hold of me.
“YOU DON’T GO AROUND PUNCHING PEOPLE FOR NO REASON!” James roared back, before I elbowed him in the stomach, and lunged myself on Chuck.
“GAAH!” was the last thing he got out, before the both of us fell to the ground, and started to wrestle like a bunch of idiots.
This was normal between us. Sure, granted – we hadn’t wrestled like this since I was eight, because Chuck didn’t know I was a girl then. It wasn’t until Sienna had pointed out the fact to him when he started to avoid me – mainly because he thought it was lame to fight with a girl… and lose.
We rolled on the ground, grunting and panting, as we pulled each other’s hair, tried to throw in a few punches, as we went on.
Somehow, Chuck managed to shove my face against the muddy ground, and twisted my arm painfully behind my back. I felt my lip throb with pain, and something hot run down from my forehead.
“STOP – THIS – INSANITY!” Chuck breathed, giving my arm a pull, and I yelled in pain.
“BREAK! BREAK! BREAK!” I yelped, and he let go at once, backing away from me. I rolled on my back, rubbing my wrist. I glared at him, as he held out a hand for me to grab. Instead of taking it, I stumbled up on my own, swaying a little.
“You… okay, Quency?” James asked carefully, obviously shocked by it all.
“Fantastic, and you?” I said, glancing Chuck, who had a bruised face and bloody nose.
“Never been better,” I said, hissing in pain as he rubbed his ribs. “Walk it off?” he suggested.
“Yeah,” I sighed, and we both limped away.
“Freaks,” I heard the Tucker twins mumble as we passed them.
I swear in the name of Merlin’s mouldy pants that Maxwell looked a little impressed.
As soon as we had left the Quidditch pitch, Chuck let out a pathetic little squeal, and I swear I saw tears in his eyes.
“Jesus, Susie,” he whined, and glared at me.
“Not my fault you’re a complete wuss,” I muttered, feeling a bit damaged myself as I gently rubbed my back.
“Well, you didn’t have so much anger or power behind your punches when you were eight!” Chuck said loudly.
I shrugged, and regretted it the very moment I had done it – the pain flashed across my entire body, and I sat down in the grass. Chuck slowly sat next to me with much effort and some wheezing. I glanced at him, watching the painful marks I had given him.
“Vicky will murder me,” I said mildly.
“She better,” Chuck huffed, also glancing at me. “Aww, shucks!” he groaned, rubbing his forehead. “Black won’t let this go easily, right?”
“Fuck him,” I snapped, pouting.
“So this is all because of him?” he asked with an astonished voice. “Wow, Soozer – usually you got all maniac over something your ol’ mama did! I never thought you’d actually take it to heart what some guy said!”
I sighed, shaking my head slowly. “That’s just the thing,” I said quietly, squinting.
“He’s just not some guy,” I said, trying to get up.
“Hey,” Chuck said, grabbing my hand before I could leave. “You love him, don’t you?”
I looked down at his innocent face, coloured with bruises, all messed up. “Of course I do,” I said quietly, feeling like a small child as I felt my bottom lip quiver dangerously.
“And… have you told him?” Chuck said, giving me a piercing look. He sighed, as I looked away, pulling my hand free. “Well, maybe you bloody well should, Soozer.”
I walked slowly away, his words spinning in my head.
How had things gone from good to bad in such a short time?
A/B: Do not judge me – I’m generally much against violence, especially men beating on women (…and vice versa), but it’s a brother/sister relationship between Susie and Chuck, so violence is acceptable. Also, so sorry for not updating, my sincerest apologies! I shall dedicate this to my wonderful, brilliant and funny friend Jannu, who just happens to be my greatest fan – and not just as a fanfic writer, but she just happens to fangirl MY LIFE :D And to make her life complete, I shall share this piece of news (since she adores Lily/Jesse/JJ stuff); JJ – my son! – said today “Mom, you’re so lame!” :(
- Lily xxx
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by I K Darcy