I always liked summers. Grandma told me summers are when you can win a boy’s heart, (she kind of believed in summer romances). Not that I have any interest in another guy’s heart, I have a boyfriend named Dean and he is really nice. He likes art and said he’d be willing to help me draw landscapes, which I’ve been struggling to draw. Unfortunately I just didn’t pick up on the fact that he meant it like a date. Not that I mind, I went and I had fun. If all our dates are like that, then it will be nice to have a Dean for a boyfriend. Though I can’t help but notice Harry’s grown a foot over the summer, and he’s gotten a bit muscular.
It’s really nice being back here. Though I can’t help, but notice Ginny’s changed. Not in a bad way though, I mean her hair is almost reaching her waist, her legs are longer, and she doesn’t have bangs anymore, and she also looks sort of pretty on a broomstick. Not in a: wow I want to snog her way, in a way that might appeal to other guys. Something that might appeal to that new guy Ginny’s dating. What’s his name again?
This is how are problem started.
Ok this is not my fault. I mean I’m still over Harry, like when Juliet was over Romeo, I mean she told him that he could kill himself, but she wanted a man who would commit. Or at least that’s how I think it goes, I’ll have to ask Hermione. The point is I’m not walking back from practices, or to practices with Harry because I want to be next to Harry, it’s because I want to talk to Ron, and I can’t just tell Harry to go away, he’s Ron’s best mate and that would be rude. This has nothing to do with the fact that I like Harry…Because I don’t…Well I do…but as a friend obviously.
I don’t like Ginny. There I thought it. I’m not walking back from practices, or to practices with her because I want to be with her I’m just walking with Ron. I have to laugh at her jokes and discuss things with her, I mean that would just be rude if I didn’t. She’s Ron’s little sister, and like Ron I think of her as only a sister, nothing more. Besides a lot of girls can have the same smelling hair stuff, it’s not like Ginny’s hair is the only one that smells like flowers. This has nothing to do with the fact that I like Ginny…Because I don’t…Well I do...but obviously it’s only in a friend kind of way.
I’m not praying that Harry and I get time alone or anything like. I’m not praying that Ron get’s locked in the changing room or gets tangled in his robes, and Harry and I spend several hours making out. No, that thought has never, ever crossed my mind. It’s not like there’s little spark in my body (which I don’t have) that goes off like a firecracker every time he pats me on the shoulder, gives me a cute (in a completely not cute way) smile, and says good job.
I’m not hoping that Ron just happens to disappear or get locked in his locker, and Ginny and I get hours alone. It’s not like I wish that Ron still liked Lavender so that Ginny and I could have moments alone while they suck face. Please. That thought has never even crossed my mind. It’s not like I get any sort of feeling when she smiles at me, it’s not like I want to comb her long (in a way that’s not too long) hair with my fingers while I kiss her.
I’m a perfectly honest person. So yes, I am being completely honest when I say that I’m over Harry, and that I don’t have a crush on him. You can take my word for it, I never lie. Expect to my mum, and sometimes to my dad. Oh and I lie to my brothers all the time, and the time I lied to Hermione about not stealing her notes for my studies. I also lied to Professor Flitwick about how Pigwedgon ate my charms homework he actually believed me, but strangely he didn’t believe me when Chrookshanks actually ate it. And then I lied all last year, but that was for the D.A’s sake, Other than that I’m a very honest person.
I’m an honest bloke. Yes I’ve lied before, but that was only to get out of life threatening situations (Voldemort anyone?). So when I’m saying I don’t like Ginny, I mean it. I mean it’s not like Ron finding out that I like her (which I don’t) is life threatening, sure a couple of punches, hexes, and unforgivable curses, is bad but nothing major. Maybe I should ask Hermione…Nope forget it, if I ask Hermione she’ll get that stupid, smug grin on her face, and go: well Harry, in that stupid, smug tone of her’s.
I don’t like Harry. How could I like him? We are so different. For starters, he has a bit of a temper, and I don’t. He is rather overprotective, and I do not worry in the least, plus he’s quidditch obsessed, and I just want to play for the Harpies. You tell me if Harry and I are meant to last for forever, and ever.
I don’t like Ginny. How could I like her? Besides the fact she’s Ron’s little sister, I’d have to like her to date her. To be honest she has a bit of a temper, she worries a lot, and she is over obsessive with the Harpies. I don’t think we’re meant to be together, besides she’s Ron’s little sister.
Alright fine, I like Harry; I still haven’t really gotten over him. Since when did that become a crime? No it never did. But it’s not like he likes me back even if he’d rather date me than Romlida Vane, (and I must be really pathetic to compare myself to her). The fact of the matter is that I just like him, and when you spend ten years worth of summers with the person who saved your flipping life it’s totally expected to have feelings for that person.
Fine, I sort of, mildly like Ginny. It’s not like I’m captivated by her looks, or how she smiles, or her humor, or her long but in a perfect way hair. Besides since when did liking your best mate’s little sister become a crime? I know, I know, since the first person that ever fell in love with his friend’s little sister. Though, this is to be kind of expected, I mean I’ve known her since she was ten, it’s only natural to kind of like her.
Damn blugders, why do they have to fly around? I fly down to clean up my now bloody nose. You ok? Ginny asks which makes me realize she’s right behind me. I notice she took her hair out of its ponytail, and it’s now falling like water over her shoulders, and close to her waist. She’s grinning at me with her odd twisted adorable grin and I have to remember that I have to say something.
It’s kind of funny, how much Harry resembles Viktor Krum, with his bloody nose. Though to be honest, he is a lot cuter and can speak English better. Harry and his stupid messy hair, and glasses. I think I’ve always had a thing for life-saving heroes that look handsomely dorky, and if we are still being honest that scar on his hand is so incredibly sexy. Harry tells me he’s fine, and I have to remember that I asked him something.
Ginny just came out of the changing room; nobody is around, not even Ron. The only thought going through my mind right now is kissing her, it’s just finding out how to stop after ten seconds that’s the problem, what if I didn’t stop? Well the answer to that is that Ron would kill me if he came out to see me snogging Ginny. So plan b- shit Ron is already out.
Harry’s standing there by himself, no Ron and I’m totally normal. Sure my brain is going a thousand miles per second, but brains are whacky, and you can’t really rely on them. I mean its kind of fact when you need it most it will pop like a bubble…Unless you’re Hermione her brain actually likes her. I still don’t like you even though the only image going through my head is us making out in the quidditch locker room, with a ton of other details I’m not going to mention. Like you being shirtless.
I always wondered what would happen if I just kissed Ginny. You know just picked her up and kissed her. I pretty much figured about get five seconds, not even enough time for you to get over the shock, and then get thrown against a wall with Ron’s fist in my face asking me what the hell I’m doing. I also figured since he is my best mate, I wouldn’t want to risk it. Why do you have to be so damn perfect?
Harry (thankfully) doesn’t know how many times I’ve considered throwing aside all reason and start snogging him. This means catching him off guard, but long enough for him to realize that I’m an ok great kisser, and that he is in love with me just terrified of my brother. That would be so nice if that were true. Why can’t things ever happen like they do in books? Why can’t he just take me by surprise and kiss me? Why does he have to be such a handsome dolt?
I don’t get them. I see both of them, talking about chaser plays, and then they give me a look as I’m supposed to say something. I’m a keeper, and to be frank I heard too much about Ginny’s dreams to become a chaser for the Harpies, to care about the plays Harry has for her. Seriously, its fine by me I can use this time to figure out how to get Hermione to let me barrow her homework. Oh damn there is Lavender, I don’t know why I started dating her, she’s no Hermione.
Harry comes in the common room and I smile at him. This time I see something, something a little bit different in his eyes. I decide that I like that look, I like it a whole lot. I rush up to hug him, and give him the details of the game, and maybe figure out what that look was all about. Though I never get a chance to, the answer comes like someone gave it to me in a huge basket filled with sweets. Bliss is the most perfect feeling. Harry’s lips on mine, feels just so perfect. I know something now, I’m not falling in love with Harry, and I’m not starting to like him. I already love him, I’ve already fallen.
I walk in and Ginny is the only thing I’m looking for. I know that if I don’t do this now I never will. I know that I just can’t get enough of her, and I don’t care if the whole world is watching. I think I’m falling in love with you. I don’t even think twice. Ginny rushes towards me and I just take her in my arms, and kiss her. It’s so much better than I imagined. It’s so great, I know I could stay like this, and if I did I would be the happiest bloke on the planet.
I lift up my head, and notice that my ex boyfriend is holding a broken glass, Denis Creevy is making kissing noises, Colin is taking pictures, and oh Merlin Colin is taking pictures! And Hermione is all giddy. Ron looks like he just got hit with a beater’s bat, and I know, without even looking at Harry, that he is looking for what Ron is going to say. That’s what kept you away from me isn’t it? I notice Ron give sort of a nod, and my insides jump up and down.
I knew it! I knew Harry liked her, I mean it was so obvious! Oh I’m so happy; they really do make a cute couple. I’m not about to say that aloud though, because Ron still looks as though he’s been hit over the head by a beaters bat. He turns to me and asks in disbelief: Hermione did my best mate just snog my little sister? I laugh, and tell him to go sit down. You sometimes are unbelievable Ronald Weasley; maybe that’s why I like you so much.
I wordlessly gesture my hand out the portrait door, and Ginny follows with that same oddly twisted smile. She looks at me, smiles and soon her lips are on mine. We stand there just snogging until the portraits start having yelling at us to take our tongue wrestling elsewhere, and then I take her hand so we can go to the grounds and not have to worry about anybody finding us. And even though the entire school is going to know by the time we get back I realize I don’t care. I’m with Ginny, that’s the only thing I’m thinking about.
I think the only thing Harry and I do for the first thirty minutes is just snogging, I’m not even sure it felt too wonderful to even try thinking. Harry’s lips on mine is the best heaven that I have ever visited, no it’s actually the only heaven. My first kiss wasn’t the as magical as this, this is my first kiss with the guy I love.
Ginny pulls away smiling the biggest smile I have ever seen on her, I notice she is biting back her lip to hide it, but it seeps through anyway. I like it when she smiles like that. “So what does this mean?” she asks, leaning against a tree with her eyebrows raised. I smile; “I guess I’m asking you to be my girlfriend.”
I smile back. “I’d like that” I reply still biting my lip. This is how a boyfriend is supposed to be, someone that I can joke around with, someone that I feel for major sparks when he kisses me. I use to think that I just liked Harry, now I know I’m in love with him, I’m just not admitting that, not yet anyway.
I know, I know what Harry is going to do, what he is going to say. I’m not exactly ok with it, but this is his thrill, and besides he have to do this. I’ll miss him more than anything, and thanks for this month, that was more than I ever expected to have with him. Oh well, so much for happy endings.
I glance at Ginny, she glances back it’s almost like she can understand this. I don’t want to do this, but I care about her way too much. I’m sorry Ginny, I’m sorry this has to happen this way. I stand up, and she follows. Ginny looks at me, with an expression, for the first time that I can’t read.
I hear Harry talking, but it’s hard to listen. He’s everything that I wanted, I had him for a little bit, and now it’s all gone. I thought I had him figured out, I thought it was going to be ok. I should have known, every year that he has been here something has happened. It seemed so odd that nothing was happening, but then it did.
If I stand beside Ginny then I’ll backtrack. I tell her to forget what I just said, and I’ll kiss her. I glance at Ginny one last time, but her soft brown eyes don’t reach mine. I walk away, thinking of everything I can remember about her, of all those really wonderful times. I’ll really miss you Ginny.
It might sound weird, but I hope the memories of Harry haunt me, because it won’t be scary, it will just be remembering you. I only want to think of all those really wonderful times. I’m not going to cry, because I know it will be ok. I’ll really miss you Harry.