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Breaking Up The Marauders by Pretty Purple Pelican
Chapter 5 : A (Very) Scary Snog
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 2

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Sirius was in full support of Remus's quiet girl fetish; in fact, he was in full support of anything that go him or his friends laid. And he liked Elle; so far, Remus's week and a half with her had been very entertaining for Sirius. He enjoyed how easy it was to make her turn scarlet, and he liked seeing Remus happy. Though he was pretty sure this was going to be a tough nut to crack in the intimacy department, he thought she was a good one to keep around, at least for a little while.

He wasn't quite as sure how he felt about the crazy psychobitch best friends that with her. Especially when that skirt was Brigid Mullins. And, as he walked in to Herbology that lovely Wednesday, it was her blonde head that he saw, to his dismay, sitting at his usual table. He felt like his heart had dropped straight through his nutsack and onto the floor.

"Mullins, what are you doing at my table?" he demanded, eying her suspiciously.

"Sitting with my friend, Sirius," she retorted, with a sickly sweet smile on her face. "Besides, I decided that if she and Remus were going to be dating, you and I might as well start to get to know each other."

"You're tall, you're blonde, and you eat children's hearts for dinner," he said, not budging. "There, I know you. Cheers, old girl!"

"Padfoot, calm down," said Remus, winking cheerily at Elle. "I checked for explosives and other various weapons before I let her join us."

"Alright," he said, taking a seat across from her. "But don't think I'm not watching you."

"Oh, I certainly hope you are," said Brigid, giving him a sly grin.

No, this was not good at all in Sirius's book. She was still acting as strangely as she had before, and he really didn't think he could handle it right now. He hadn't been laid in two weeks, and his nerves were already frayed as it was. "Right," he said, attempting to distract himself. "What is it that we're working on today?"

"Hidden healing properties in bleeding hearts," said Remus, flipping his book open. "We're going to be slicing them open down the middle and squeezing the juice into these vials."

"Well, thank you, Professor Moony," snickered James, coming up behind him with Peter in tow. "Now where are me and Wormtail supposed to sit?"

Lily, who had been watching the conversation intently, said, "Peter, you can join me if you want."

"Looks like you have two empty seats at your table, Evans," said James, grinning at her.

Lily glared at him, still annoyed that she had kissed him and enjoyed it so much. "Fine, Potter, but you have to get to shred the samples."

"Anything for you, my darling," said James, winking at Sirius. "Besides, you seem a little steamed, and I don't trust you with a knife right now."

"Good thinking," said Sirius, reaching for the small blade in Brigid's hand. "Give me that, Mullins."

"No!" snapped Brigid, but his hand knocked the sharp edge against her palm, slicing it open. She hissed in pain, and then, most unfortunately for Sirius, she had a brilliant idea. "Shit, shit. Oh, my God. I'm bleeding."

"I know, I'm surprised you can, too," said Sirius, though he did have the courtesy to look slightly ashamed of himself.

Brigid started to make herself freak out, causing even Lily to look panicked. "," she gasped, trying to make it as real as possible. "I think I might pass out."

"Is everything alright over here?" asked Professor Sprout. "Black, you better take her up to the Hospital Wing. I don't want her dripping all over the specimens."


Brigid gave a particularly melodramatic moan, and Sirius grumbled, "Oh, alright. Come on, Mullins."

She took his arm and let him lead her out of the greenhouse, leaning heavily on his arm. Once they were out of sight, she stood up straight and said, "Alright, Black. Time to get to business."

To his dismay, she grabbed him by the collar and pressed her lips firmly onto his. For one fleeting moment, Sirius was sure that his theory about her being the devil was true and that she was trying to suck out his soul; but then he realized that he rather liked what she was doing- liked it enough, in fact, to put his arms around her waist and pull her closer to him.

Her arms slithered around his neck, and she pressed herself so hard up against him that they fell into a nearby bush. They landed with an extremely ungraceful thump, and, if Sirius's breath hadn't already been taken away figuratively speaking, this did it literally. "What the hell was that?" he gasped, keeping a firm grip on Brigid, in case she decided to escape without running away.

"I'm not really afraid of blood," she said, with a hint of gloating in her voice. "And I was bored."

"You really are completely batshit, you know that right?"

"You bet," grunted Brigid, wiggling out of his arms and popping back up to her feet. "Now, I really should go get this cut taken care of. I've already bled all over your shirt."

"Hold on, just a minute-" started Sirius, scrambling to regain both his composure and his footing.

"Bye!" chirped Brigid before sprinting off towards the castle, leaving a dumbfounded Sirius standing in a shrub.


As they headed back from Herbology, Elle became aware, as she had for the past week and a half, of heads turning as she walked hand in hand with the infamous Remus Lupin. Luckily for her, Remus found her constant shade of red to be quite endearing, and it only made him bestow more kisses upon her soft, pink lips. Despite the fact that she enjoyed this constant affection, the jeers and rolling eyes were really getting to her by the end of the week.

Surprisingly enough for a boy who seemed to be too aloof for the feelings of females, Remus was extremely intuitive about her emotions. That day, as they passed a particularly bitter former flame, he gave Elle's hand a gentle squeeze and questioned, "Do you want to talk about it?"

Elle, startled by his openness, asked, "Is that something you do?"

Remus let out a warm laugh, the one that Elle found herself daydreaming of the whole week, and said, "I'm not Sirius or James, you know. I do have the capability to communicate."

"I know," said Elle, flushing scarlet. "I just, I don't know, I didn't think that was something that was important to you."

He steered her into a little nook in the hallway and leaned against the wall across from her. "Fire away, Miss Insontis," he smiled, eyes twinkling.

She had never been very good about sharing her emotions, and she knew that. The worst part about was that she was an extremely sensitive person who often had too much going on; it was a blessing, really, that she wasn't good at hiding what she felt. Brigid and Lily had always been able to sense a problem a mile away, and they often could tell Elle what was troubling her before she had realized herself. But here she was, facing a boy whose heart she was planning to break, a boy who was beginning to steal her own heart, and she was absolutely speechless.

"I'm a virgin!" she blurted. Instinctively, she pressed her hand to her mouth and became entirely interested in the floor. That can't actually be it, she thought, terrified to look Remus in the face. Things were never even going to get that far. This is going to be over before anything could even start. Why did I even say that? God, Elle, you're so stupid-

Her self-berating was cut-off by Remus reaching out to her and taking her in his arms. "Is that seriously what this is about?" he murmured, cradling her cheek in his palm. Without any other option, she nodded slowly, feeling her cheeks burn even brighter than before. Remus let out a heavy sigh. "Elle, I absolutely knew that when I started this. If I've made you uncomfortable in any way-"

"No, it's not that," she interrupted, stepping back slightly, aware that eyes were on them. "It's just that everyone looks at us and expects me to just be another one who-"

"Another one who what?" asked Remus, a hint of disappointment in his voice. "Look, never mind about that. You're going to have to trust me, if this is going to be anything. Okay?"

"I've never done anything like this before," gasped Elle, beginning to feel a calm rush over her. Never before had she felt such a cathartic feeling just by speaking.

"Well, I have," he said, with a wry smile. "So why don't you hand the reins over to me, and I promise that if things move in that direction, it's going to be you who makes the decision. How does that sound?"
"I think that sounds okay," said Elle, her head reeling slightly from both guilt and affection.

"Okay?" he chuckled. "You are really weird, you know that?" He wrapped her in his arms and kissed her head tenderly. "But terribly cute."

Elle buried her head in his chest, glad that her face was hidden. She could think of nowhere else in the world as comfortable as his embrace, with his earthy, calming scent filling her completely. If only she had discovered this before this whole stupid prank was thought up; if only Lily and Brigid weren't so set on destroying them, then she might have had a shot at happiness.

For now, all she could do was hide in his body, hoping that the rest of the world would disappear and leave her in peace.


Meanwhile, Lily had returned to her dormitory feeling extremely grumpy. Potter had spent the entire Herbology class tormenting her with the heart-shaped flowers, saying that his own heart was bleeding because she "snogged and slapped", as he put it.

She knew why she was having such a difficult time fulfilling her part of the plan; she was finally admitting to herself that she did have feelings for James Potter and that frustrated her to no end. Attempting to relieve some of her annoyance, she slammed her fist repeatedly against the headboard.

"Hey, Evans!" called an irritatingly smooth voice from the other room. James must have just entered their common room. "Who're you banging in there?"

"The headboard, you toerag!" she called back, turning to see him leaning against her door frame. "Can I help you?"

"So it turns out that bleeding turns your buddy Mullins on," he said, examining his nails nonchalantly. "She pretty much army tackled Padfoot and snogged him senseless."

"Is that so?" said Lily coolly. So, Brigid had started on Sirius, and now it was up to her. But he was just being so childish and annoying, and she couldn't even think what it was that was bothering her about his presence. "And?"

"Just thought I'd see if you knew anything about it," he said, shrugging. "Carry on shagging the headboard. Just try to keep it down."

"Very funny," she muttered, pressing her face into the pillow.

She thought he had left until he said, "Look, can I ask you a question?"

"No, you can not have the answers to the Transfiguration homework," she said, turning to face him. "You're not stupid. You can do them yourself."

"It's not that," he said, looking almost nervous. "I just wanted to know...'cuz I thought you'd bring it up, tell me you were drunk or someone slipped you a potion or something..." He was so fidgety and uncomfortable that Lily's heart actually began to soften. "Why did you kiss me yesterday?"

Here we go, Lil, she thought, biting her lip and waiting for the words to come out. Just tell him what he wants to hear. Tell him what you want to say. Instead, she mumbled, "I don't know," and dove back into the pillow.

She heard him walk across the room and sit down on her comforter. "Get off my bed," she said, her voice muffled by the pillow.

He did no such thing, and suddenly she felt his hot breath on her ear, making her skin light on fire. "You know you want me," he whispered, sending an unwanted shiver up her spine.

She flipped over, preparing to fail in the plan once again and tell him to get the hell out, when she was taken aback by how close he actually was. His hazel eyes were burning with questions that she couldn't wait any longer to answer; her heart leaped into her throat and she whispered hungrily, "James."

It was unclear who kissed who first, but their mouths were exploring and tongues tasting, and Lily felt like her soul was going to burst from ecstasy. How had she resisted this for so long?

They parted only for a moment when James said, "It's safe to say that you don't hate me anymore, right?"

In response, Lily only kissed him harder.

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