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Big Girls Don't Cry by PurpleDusk
Chapter 11 : Hearts On Fire
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 4

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Disclaimer: I do not own anything you recognise! I’m not J.K Rowling –even though I wish I were! I only own Scarlett Turner, Haylie Myers, Violet Turner, Professor Hale, Professor Carn –a whole bunch of other OC’s- and the plot.
Thank you and I hope you enjoy reading.


Thursday, March 9th 1978


“Happy birthday!” I exclaimed, jumping onto Remus –who was sleeping soundly in his bed. I’d managed to get into the boys dormitory due to their lack of ‘security’. The girls’ dorm had an enchantment that needed a password to let you go up the stair case –thanks to Lily. If the person trying to get into the dorm got the password wrong on all three attempts they were locked out and pushed by an invisible force down the stairs and back into the common room.

Remus rolled over with a moan, along with all the rest boys in the dorm –just the Marauders, Benji had gotten up earlier.

“Go away, Sirius, we’ll play in the snow tomorrow...” Moony groaned. I laughed at him and leaned close to Remus’ face.
“Having dreams about Sirius are we? Well, Hayls won’t be too happy about that.” I teased and he sat up at the sound of a girl’s voice in his ear.

“Bloody hell, Scar! How did you get in here?!” Remus exclaimed, I giggled as the other Marauders woke suddenly from their deep slumbers.

“What in Merlin’s name is going on?” Peter groaned,
“It’s okay Lily! I’ll kill the bunny for you!” James shouted,
“I’ll eat the pie!” Sirius chimed in. I fell off the bed while hysterically laughing at the boys’ reactions to waking up so suddenly.

“How did she get in here?” Peter asked and Remus shrugged.
“You guys have really bad security.” I stated, whipping my eyes carefully, making sure not to smudge my mascara and eyeliner I’d put on a few minutes before breaking into their dorm.

“Ah, we really ought to do something about that,” Remus commented,
“No way! I like waking up to a girl in our room, even if I didn’t get anywhere with her.” Sirius chuckled. I threw a pillow at him.
“For your information, I am in here to wish Remus a happy birthday; it’s not every day you turn seventeen!” I exclaimed and ran over to hug him again.

“Okay, okay, we get it, you love Remus and it’s his birthday, now out so we can get dressed!” James chased me out of the room; he was wearing nothing but his boxers with little Snitches and brooms on them and his Gryffindor socks.

“Nice boxers, James!” I yelled from the edge of the stairs as he slammed the door.

I ran down the stairs, already dressed in my uniform, and jumped onto Haylie’s back.

“He’s up! He was also dreaming about Sirius...” I giggled and climbed down from clinging to her back like a monkey.

Haylie laughed as we headed down to the Great Hall for breakfast, passing gossiping fourth and fifth years as we went. I gave the gossipers a deadly look when I heard my name being whispered.

“Crazy bitch...” A short, blonde fourth year muttered when I threatened to punch his head in.

 When we entered the Great Hall it was already full of students chatting and stuffing themselves to the brim with food. I felt like saying ‘you do know we’re going to have lunch sometime today.’  But thought better of it, it’d be funnier to see them explode.

The plates were piled high with every breakfast food imaginable –eggs, bacon, toast, pancakes, waffles, crumpets, cereals, and a truck load more!

“So,” I said while piling my plate high with chocolate covered Belgium waffles, “got anything planned for Remus’ birthday?”

Haylie, who was chowing down on maple-syrup covered pancakes, looked up to me and swallowed, a tinge of pink colouring her cheeks.
“Actually, I was hoping you and the boys could throw a party for him –Gryffindor’s only, of course.”
“Awesome! I’ll get right on it, I’ll plan during classes and I’ll set it up at the end of lunch and in my free period –all you have to do is keep him out of the Common Room.” I gushed.

Haylie beamed at me, “thanks so much, Scar, I’ll do my best. I owe you.” She couldn’t stop smiling –even when eating, which was very amusing to watch.

When the boys –and Katie- finally joined us, I was sipping at my goblet which was filled with water, not pumpkin juice – I’ve always hated the stuff, tastes like goblin piss...or so how I imagine goblin piss to taste like...

“Why so happy, Hayls?” Moony asked, leaning down to kiss her forehead.
“I’m happy to see you. Happy birthday,” She giggled, reaching up and really snogging Remus.

“Ah, jeez, get a room!” Called one of the passing Slytherins.
“You wish you needed a room, you bloody abominable twat!” I shouted back, James and Peter gave me a high five while managing to spray most of the table with pumpkin juice whilst trying to contain their hysterical laughter.

Pretty much all the Gryffindors were in hysterics, except Sirius who was over at the Hufflepuff table snogging Katie.

I felt a burning hot anger flare up in my chest, a jealous rage taking over my previous blissful feelings. I felt as if my heart were on fire, as I’d never be able to love anyone except Sirius. I felt as if my heart was on fire, it hurt so much, why did Sirius have to be with her, the stupidest, meanest person in seventh year –forget the Slytherin Princess, Bellatrix, Katie takes the cake for Queen Bitch of Hogwarts. Why didn’t he pick me?
But I already knew the answer to that question. I was his pathetic little friend –practically his sister. I was nothing special; I was just a speck of dust on the windshield of his life. I was nothing compared to the beautiful, smart, talented and charming Katie Bird.

“Erm... Scarlett?” I heard Lily’s voice,
“Your hair is flashing yellow and green.” She told me. Yellow means anger and green means jealousy. I took a few deep breaths and controlled my hair to stay the black and purple I liked it to be.

Lily and Haylie shrugged, the boys hadn’t noticed.

“I’m going to go to class.” I mumbled and excused myself from the table, making my way, slowly, to the dungeons for potions.

Potions passed at a snail’s pace and by the end of it I had come up with a list of things for James, Peter and Sirius to do for Remus’ party.

“Sirius?” I grabbed his attention while we walked out of class and towards the Transfiguration and History of Magic classrooms.
“Mmm...” He mused,
“Could you sneak down to Honeydukes sometime today? I’m throwing a party for Remus and we need food.” I told him,
“Sure, extra chocolate frogs for you?” He asked.

I nodded, “I’ll pay you back.” I promised.
“I know you will!” He called as we went our separate ways, me to Transfiguration, him to History of Magic.

In Transfiguration we basically revised everything we’d ever learnt from first year to now in preparation for our N.E.W.T’s. To be perfectly honest, I was freaking out about the N.E.W.T’s! They were only month and a half away and I was seriously struggling with studying, I kept getting distracted.

I reminded myself to go to the library sometime today to study.

God, now I’m sounding like Lily and Remus!

Making my way to lunch, I noticed I wasn’t hungry so I actually turned around and headed to the library. Madam Pince, being the grouchy and spiteful person that she is, yelled at me when I entered.

“You better not have any food!”

I rolled my eyes and kept making my way to the back corner, the quietest part of the library. I dumped my book bag next to the chair and retrieved my History of Magic text book from the bottom of it.

I opened it up to the page I’d stopped reading on the night before and continued to study.

The chapter was all about Gellert Grindelwald, the darkest wizard known to wizard kind –so far. He took pleasure in torturing and killing muggles and wizards alike. He was eventually defeated by Dumbledore in 1945 and then locked in his own prison -Nurmengard- and he’s been there ever since.
Just reading about him gave me a wicked case of the heebie-jeebies, which made me think about how I would cope with facing off with the new dark wizard threatening to rise and kill muggles and muggle borns.

“Wow, Scarlett... Studying?” A voice dragging me from my thoughts, I looked up to see Sirius, holing a massive brown bag with the Honeydukes symbol on the front.

“Yeah, well, if I want to actually get out of Hogwarts I’ll need to pass the N.E.W.T’s.” I stated, marking where I’d stopped reading and closing the text book.

“Very true, I got the stuff.” He smiled, lifting up the bag of candy.
“Thank you, honestly. How much do I owe you?” I asked,
“Don’t worry about it,” Sirius said, shrugging it off.
“No, really,” I pressed,
“Just drop it. You have no debt to me.” Sirius declared. I smiled, got up and hugged him.

“You’re the best.” I murmured into his ear, he hugged my back. He was warm, so very warm and I loved feeling his strong and warm arms around me.
“I know. You’re pretty cool too.” He chuckled. I shivered with delight at the feel of his breathe on my neck.

My stomach rumbled, ruining the moment, and suddenly I was starving.

“There are extra chocolate frogs and red vines in the bag, they’re labelled ‘Scarlett’s’.” Padfoot told me and walked off, leaving me to the massive bag of candy and study time.


When I finally gave up on studying and I’d cautiously stuffed myself with a mixture of red vines and chocolate frogs –making sure that Madam Pince didn’t catch me-, I left the library and around the corner I bumped into Katie.

“Oh, hey.” I greeted her.
Katie rolled her eyes, “don’t act like we’re friends, Turner.”
“And stop getting so cosy with my boyfriend, just back off, got it?” She said –it sounded like a threat.
“Are you threatening me?” I stepped closer to her, getting right up in her face.
“Yes. Just stay away from him!” She shrieked.

I pushed her shoulders back which made her take a step away from me, I kept following her.

“Look, bud, I don’t know what your deal is, but I don’t want Sirius, he’s like my brother.” I denied. I mean, I would’ve loved to say ‘yeah, I’m totally in love with your boyfriend, so deal with it.’ But I knew that if I told her she’d tell Sirius and then things would get awkward.

Katie made a ‘pfft’ sound and pushed past me, and headed into the library.

“What was that about?” I jumped as I heard Haylie’s voice.
“Oh, nothing.”
“Okay. But can I still hex her?” She asked, beaming up at me with anticipation and delight.
“No! Sirius will kill you!”

We both collapsed in laughter, knowing damn well that Haylie could beat Sirius to a pretty little pulp any day of the week.



When Haylie finally bought Remus into the Gryffindor Common Room, I’d managed to throw a whole party atmosphere together. Every seventh year Gryffindor was in the Common Room whether they liked it or not.
There was music blasting from floating speakers, people jumping up and down and cramming food in their mouths at the same time. I’d put up a banner that read ‘Happy Birthday Remus’ and even had random streamers strung up around the room. To be honest, it looked a little like an eleven year olds birthday party –apart from the table full of Fire-Whiskey shots and massive steins full of Butterbeer.

“Happy birthday Moony!” I cried, running up to him and Haylie who had just walked through the portrait. When everyone heard me yell out Remus’ nick name, cheers went out and a few wolf-whistles could be heard. Remus looked sort-of surprised, but mostly, he was in shock.

I slammed into him, wrapping my arms around him into one of my infamous bear hugs. Sirius, Peter and James were close behind him, crashing into my back and turning mine and Remus’ hug into a mosh-pit type atmosphere.

“You guys are so spastic!” I laughed and pushed my way out of the bro-hug,
“But you love us!” James cooed from somewhere between Peter and Sirius,
“Yeah, yeah.” I shrugged it off and waded my way through the crowd of seventh years and towards the shot table.

I downed four shots of Firewhiskey in about five minutes.

“Wow, I thought you didn’t drink.” Haylie’s voice came from behind me,
I grinned like the Cheshire Cat from Alice and Wonderland, “it’s the first of many seventeenth birthday parties, may as well start now.”

Haylie rolled her eyes, took a shot of Firewhiskey and carried two steins of Butterbeer to a back corner where I spotted Remus sitting, an eager smile tugging on his lips. Haylie sat the two steins down on the small table in front of them and sat on Remus’ lap.

I smiled, happy for them, and averted my eyes.

In the middle of the room, James and Lily were locked in a loving embrace, slow dancing even though the song playing through the speakers was a total jump-up-and-down song. I hadn’t taken much notice of James and Lily’s relationship, which was kind of stupid since they’d take so long to get together in the first place. But they seemed very happy and very stable for the moment. As far as I could tell from what Sirius had told me, they didn’t really fight and when they did it was only about stupid little things like James forgetting that they made plans to snog in a broom closet or Lily forgetting that some nights were dedicated to Marauder Prank Planning Sessions.

Peter and Sirius looked sort of lost, I guess, they weren’t allowed to bring their girlfriends since this was a Gryffindor only affair, but we were going to celebrate all the birthdays (there are quite a few in March) on the next Hogsmeade trip anyways. Peter wondered over to Paige and Amber and they started to have a pretty good time, I hoped –for Ellen’s sake-, that Peter was getting some new fans and for her, new competition.

Sirius, on the other hand, wondered over to me.

“Hey,” I hiccupped, giving him a goofy smile and grabbing another shot glass,
“Hi,” He hiccupped back.

Both of us, obviously drunk, cracked up laughing at each other’s maniac hiccupping. James and Lily even stopped dancing to see what all of the fuss was about, but soon ignored it to go drift back into their own little world. Suddenly, I felt this pang of emptiness, like I wouldn’t ever have that.

Man, alcohol messes with your emotions and your brain...

I don’t know how long it was until I sobered up a bit, but it felt like a while. But when I did, I got the little cupcake I’d made for Remus and made my way over to him –breaking up a major snog session with Haylie in the process.

“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Remus! Happy birthday to you!” I sang, he looked up from Haylie’s eyes for a moment and smiled at me,
“Thank you, Scar. Really,” He said, I shrugged it off and gave him the cupcake with blue icing and a little wolf-candle stuck in it.

Even he laughed at the wolf-candle stuck in the little cake.
Haylie moved a bit so Remus could reach up at hug me, “you’re amazing, you know that?” He whispered in my ear.

I giggled, “I’ve been told.”

“Yeah, by me! In bed!” Sirius yelled out from across the room. Haylie and I pissed ourselves laughing, Hayls actually fell off her chair and onto the floor she became so hysterical.

I was the first to calm down, and when I did, I dragged myself over to an extremely drunk Sirius and pulled him up the stairs, all the while, he was moaning at me like a five year old telling him he wasn’t tired and he didn’t need to go to bed.

“Yes you do, Padfoot, you’re pissed drunk and you need to sleep it off before classes tomorrow and I know if I leave you down there, you’ll do something incredibly stupid that you will definitely regret.” I told him, a wave of strictness coming over my voice, and for a second, I felt like a mother. Creepy.

Sirius gave him a pout when I finally pushed him into his bed and pulled the covers over him.

“Stay with me at least, we’ll have a bit of fun!” He cried when I headed for the door. I stopped dead in my tracks, I knew what he meant by ‘fun’ and boy was it tempting. But I couldn’t just take advantage of a drunken friend like that –especially a drunk friend who’s in a relationship with someone who would just love to beat me to a pulp.

Without another word, I left the boys dorm and headed for my own. Amber and Paige were already snoring their way through their dreams when I got in, and Haylie followed me shortly after. That just left Lily, who was probably still dancing with James.

When I laid down to sleep that night, I fell asleep thinking about what would have happened if I hadn’t left the boys dorm.


Sunday, March 12th 1978


It was a surprisingly normal start to the day. I got up and had a shower, got dressed in my ratty old blue jeans and long sleeve white top. I jerked a brush through my maniac bed hair and powdered a bit of light make up on to cover how tired I looked.

When I got out of the bathroom, Paige shoved me out of the way and locked herself in the bathroom.

“What’s up with her?” I asked Amber, who was lounging around her on bed reading through an old copy of Witch Weekly still in her pink love heart pyjamas.

Amber shrugged, “probably just needs to go to the bathroom.”

I nodded and made my way downstairs to the Common Room where the Marauders (minus Remus, I noticed) were huddled in a corner, the Marauders map laid out in front of them. Lee Myers, Haylie’s brother in third year, was sitting by the fire with a pretty looking girl with wavy blonde hair, she was laughing at something he’d said and he was smiley at her with eagerness.

Lee likes her... I giggled to myself and made my way over to James, Peter and Sirius.

“Morning,” I yawned and the three guys looked at me,
“Morning? Yeah right, it’s, like, two in the afternoon, Scar.” James scoffed.
“Oh.” I sighed.

“Is Haylie up in your dorm?” Peter asked in a small voice,
I shook my head, “no, I thought she was down here with you guys. Why?”
“Hayls and Remus are missing.” Sirius declared. My eyebrows shot up in shock.

Haylie and Remus... Missing? What if something bad had happened to them? What if they’d been captured?

What if they were dead?

My eyes prickled with tears, I couldn’t lose Haylie and Remus, they were like family. I’d already lost my father, if I lost them; I thought I might crack once and for all.

Sirius, obviously seeing the alarm and shock on my face, stood up and hugged me,
“Its okay, I’m sure they’re fine. We’ve told Dumbledore and all the teachers are on high alert –just in case. But I’m sure they’re fine, if anything happened to them, Haylie would probably kick their arses.” Sirius comforted me, stroking my long, black hair that cascaded down my back like a waterfall. I buried my face into his warm and well-toned chest, enjoying the moment of having him close, even if it wasn’t all that private – I could feel James and Peter’s eyes on me and Sirius.

I realised I was shaking, it was cold even with Sirius pressed up against me, but I saw fear for Remus and Haylie flash through me. I let out a tiny whimper, one that I couldn’t even hear with my ears, but Sirius obviously heard.

“Hey, it’s gonna be okay, they’ll come back, I promise.” He gave me and small, reassured smile and kissed my forehead. I swear I could’ve melted right then and there. The kiss sent tingles from my head to toe and –even though two of my best friends were missing- I felt a strange calmness wash over me, it was as if every cell of my body new that Sirius wouldn’t let anything bad happen and that everyone and everything would be alright as long as he was around.

The feeling sort of scared me, I’d never felt like that before. So, I did what any sane person would do – I ran.

I left the common room and headed outside for some fresh air.


Later that night, we (minus Haylie and Remus, who were still missing) had another Auror training class. We were, once again, standing in a line in the middle of the Quidditch pitch. Ely was re-capping on the basics of hand-to-hand combat. She punched and kicked the air and looked like she was a black belt in all martial arts.

I sighed; Haylie would’ve loved this training session...

But it was no time to think about Haylie and Remus; I had to focus on kicking James’ butt.

I was paired up with James and Sirius was paired up with Peter, but we’d all get a chance to go up against Ely.

James threw the first punch without warning; I only just blocked it from connecting with my face. I countered the attack with a round-house kick that hit him squarely in the chest, probably leaving a bruise in the process. James stumbled backwards, but caught himself before he fell on his arse. He came at me again and aimed a kick to my chest; I stepped backwards, his foot only just missing.

I could hear distance laughter; “getting beaten by a girl, eh, Prongs?” Sirius chuckled, sitting on the ground, waiting for Peter to finish trying to beat Ely. But he was soon silenced by Ely, who decided it was his turn to go up against her.

“Bring it on, Little Red.” Sirius smiled, he’d come up with the nick name for her a few days ago, I thought it was stupid because it was obvious she didn’t have red hair, it was mostly brown.

“My hair is not red!” Ely shrieked, I’d never heard her talk like that, it startled me a bit, but I went back to focusing on James’ pathetic punches.

“You punch like a girl,” I chuckled,
“You should know, you are a girl.” He retorted. I punched him –with full force- in the shoulder, Prongs stumbled back and only just caught himself before he fell.

I smiled wickedly, “I know I am, but I can punch harder than you.”

James gave me a scornful look and sat down on the ground; “let’s just watch Padfoot get his butt kicked by Little Red.

I nodded and sat with him. Turns out, Sirius sucks at hand-to-hand combat. Ely had him pined onto the ground within two minutes and I suspected he would wake up extremely sore in his chest –due to the amount of round-house kicks and punches Ely hit him with -tomorrow morning.

I got up to take my turn up against Ely.

“I’m not the only one who can get my arse kicked by a girl,” James teased Sirius when he finally got out of Ely’s grip and went back to join Peter.
“Shut up, Prongs.” He snapped.

“Well, he’s not too happy.” I giggled and Ely smiled,
“He really isn’t the best at hand-to-hand. I think he should stick to the wand battles.” She commented.

I was still laughing when Ely and I started. I got a few punches in and a couple of kicks before she almost knocked me to the ground, but I caught myself, kicking my leg up on a random angle and making Ely lose balance and causing her to fall to the ground and gaining me enough time to pin her.

“Well done,” She complimented,
“I got lucky.” I smiled, helping her up.  

A/N: Hey guys! So, what did you think of this chapter? Please tell me... in a review! Anyways, just wanted to thank all you readers again for the 800+ reads :D 
Again, I haven't even started writing chapter twelve yet so it'll be awhile like this one, but I promise to have it up ASAP. 
PurpleDusk xx

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