Chapter 1 : the youngest daughter
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Narcissa didn’t really want to marry Lucius Malfoy when it came down to it.
Sure, she was willing, because her parents told her to, and because she did, in fact, wish to carry on the pureblood line since her eldest sister had been blasted off her auntie’s stupid family tree tapestry and her second-eldest sister had declared her absolute detestation of children, and, consequently, her plan to have none.
Sure, Lucius was a respectable pureblood who had enough money to support them and any child they had together. He also wasn’t at all bad looking, and was one of the very few who found her snarky smart-alecy comments amusing rather than stupid.
Cissy could very well see herself falling in love with the man -if she was willing to let herself try.
She’d always been the neutral sister. Not the insane one -that was a spot reserved for Bella -or the serene one -that was Andy. Narcissa didn’t really care one way or the other if Mudbloods continued to practice magic, just as long as any child of hers was a pureblood.
She was also the only one in the family whou still thought of Sirius, Uncle Alfred, and dearest Andromeda -the girl who’d raised Narcissa and Bellatrix and Sirius and Regulus, the one who only wanted to marry for love, the one who’d guaranteed herself a life of being enemy to her own family just so she could be happy -as family and not the scum on the bottom of her very expensive, French, hand-made, leather shoes.
Of course, she’d never voiced these opinions, as she did not wish to get disowned as well, but she was sure that Sirius and Andy knew where she lay on the family loyalty line.
Sirius hated Lucius.
Cissy didn’t really know why, or when it began, but everyone knew of the boy’s feelings, Lucius included. Lucius hated her own cousin right back with just as much venom.
Lucius thought she was beautiful.
Of course, Andy and Sirius and Regulus used to tell her that she was beyond gorgeous when they were all small and still friends, but Cissy knew they were just being nice. Cissy knew the truth. She’d always been average next to her sisters, both of whom shone so brightly that Narcissa’s gentle little glow had always seemed almost non-existant in comparison.
She was delicate, like a new lily -or, rose. Lilies reminded her too much of Lily Evans, the most gorgeous girl Narcissa had ever seen, her sisters included. Narcissa did not wish to be reminded of the girl who was always kind to her, even if she made sure that she didn’t deserve the girl’s kindness.
Narcissa did not wish to be reminded of the girl who would probably die for some nobel, brave reason, standing up for what she believed in, protecting those she loved.
How Cissy wished she’d have any small fraction of the courage to do that. But no, she was delicate.
The word made her smile in disgust.
Even though she was.
Her sisters had always been the strong ones, the brave ones, the ones who took charge, and it had been alright. Why should the youngest sister have to be strong when she had two sisters to protect her? Why should she have to be brave when she had two sisters to keep her safe?
Why should she have to take charge when she never, not even for a second, got to decide anything for herself?
She was just a pureblood girl, and they merely did what their parents asked, no comments, no questions asked. They were just pawns in the game of pureblood linage, they didn't get to have a say in anything.
Of course, now, she technically had only one sister who would do that for her, but, in her heart, Cissy knew that if push came to shove, Andy would not hurt either of her sisters.
If she had to, Cissy’s eldest sister would still die for Bella and Cissy herself, because that’s what sisters do -love each other unconditionally -and Andromeda wouldn’t let some stupid pureblood war stop her from loving her sisters. Andromeda had always been the best sister out there.
But Lucius thought she was strong.
Lucius had seen her smash Rodolphus’s face in when he’d gotten too close for comfort and hadn’t moved when she’d asked nicely. Lucius had seen her stand up for herself to Snape when that vile man had called her weak. Lucius had seen her get angry at Bella for saying something that was overly cruel.
And even though Narcissa only wanted to make her parents happy, to finally, just for once, be the best daughter, sometimes, late at night, when she lay awake in the dark, unable to just close her eyes and let sleep overcome her, she could feel her life slipping away from her grasp. She could feel all control lost. And she, sometimes, just for a moment, forgot just how to regain it once more.
Sometimes, she felt like running away like her sister.
But in the day, when she saw Lucius’s smiling face, when he kissed her gently and brushed her hair out of her face, when he laughed at her muttered comments and made some of his own, when he told her that she was beautiful and looked at her like she was the only thing in the world and whispered in her ear that he loved her, Narcissa was strangely okay with her future being planned. Strangly okay with the prospect of spending every day of the rest of her life with Lucius, the closet romantic, to protect her and keep her happy and amuse her and love her.
Because, after all, she could see herself married to him, being Narcissa Malfoy instead of Narcissa Black. She could see herself waking up to his face every morning and being at home when he returned from work and going to sleep next to him every night.
She could see herself loving him.
And so she married him.
Just like that.
okay, so i'm kind of iffy on this little one-shot. i mean, i don't even know if it'll get through validation, since i think i'm toeing the line of can-write and can't-write with the marriage. obviously, if someone other than the staff is reading this, then it got through, but, well....
just as a really important note, narcissa did end up wanting to marry lucius. she convinced herself. it wasn't a forced marriage at all.
so, leave me a review if you liked it, yeah? it would mean so much to me(:
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