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Wall Flower by kirstenalanna
Chapter 12 : chapter eleven: dream
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 3

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"I was a little girl alone in my little world who dreamed of a little home for me.
I played pretend between the trees, and fed my houseguests bark and leaves, and laughed in my pretty bed of green.  I had a dream, That I could fly from the highest swing. I had a dream"

Dream- Priscilla Ahn

“Goodbye family,” James said as he and I stood together from the Ravenclaw table.  After James was released from the hospital wing, he had made it a point to sit with me at the Ravenclaw table unless I suggested otherwise.

            Much to the other Ravenclaw house member’s distain, that also meant that the Weasley/ Potter family now dominated 1/3 of the table.  I found it incredibly amusing. 

            “James just because you’re in-“  Rose said, rolling her eyes.

            “Don’t you dare finish that sentence Rose,”  James interrupted.  I looked between the two of them curiously.

            “Seriously James.  We never get to see Lexie anymore.  I want to hang out with her too,”  Rose said, standing up with her hands on her hips.  I smirked, and slowly backed away to sit next to Fred.

            “Where are you going?”  Fred asked around his breakfast sausage.  Rose looked at him with disgust.

            “How am I related to you?”  she asked rhetorically.  “Where are you two going?”

            “Hogsmeade.  We’ll probably see you guys down there,”  James replied.  Albus and Lily smirked and shared a glance.  I pretended to ignore it.

“James just because you’re in-“  Rose said, rolling her eyes.

            “Don’t you dare finish that sentence Rose,”  James interrupted.  I looked between the two of them curiously.

            “Seriously James.  We never get to see Lexie anymore.  I want to hang out with her too,”  Rose said, standing up with her hands on her hips.  I smirked, and slowly backed away to sit next to Fred.

            “Popcorn?”  Fred asked offering a bowl to me.  I nodded, grabbed a handful and watched as the show that is Rose Weasley and James Potter...the second.

            “You’re not the only one who cares about her Rose.  I’m entitled to take her to Hogsmeade for a visit.”

            “Yes James you are.  However, you also monopolize all of her time after classes.  I never get to see her!  I care about her as much as you do!” 

            “Hey, why do I feel like I’m the kid in the middle of a custody argument between two divorced parents?”  I whispered to Fred.  He laughed, grabbing a handful of popcorn again.

            “ kind of are in the middle of a custody argument,”  Fred said, nodding seriously causing me to crack up.

            By this point, more than half of the Great Hall were watching Rose and James argue....over me...with mild amusement.  A few of the teachers were even taking bets.  On what, I’m not sure.

            I stood, and walked to stand in between them.  Neither of them noticed.

            “Excuse me?”  I asked.

            “James, you’re a PRAT!”

            “And you’re a friend HOG!”

            “Rose, James?”


            “No it wasn’t!  It was this summer!!  You got into all of my knickers because you thought it’d be funny for Stevie to see them.  HANGING FROM THE ROOF!”

            Okay...who’s Stevie?

            “That was Albus!”  James argued back.

            “Hey!”  Albus protested.

            “Okay, Rose, James really I’m flattered but-“  I tried again, only to be cut off.

            “I wrote this Hogsmeade in on our schedule!”  James protested.

            “OI!  SHUT UP!”  I screeched, freezing everyone into silence.

            “Honestly, you’re surprised I had to resort to a ridiculous volume?”  I asked rhetorically.

            Fred answered anyways.


            I ignored him.  “I’m sorry Rose, but I’m going to Hogsmeade with James today.  I’ll catch up with you later, yeah?”  I said.  Rose smiled sweetly at me before glaring at James.

            “Alright,”  she answered, walking out of the Great Hall.

            I turned to James next.

            “Stop being a git.”

            “But I wasn’t-“

            “Girls don’t like having the world see their knickers.”

            He looked at the ground, embarrassed.  Fred guffawed.

            “And...a schedule?”  I asked pointedly.  Fred looked away, and James started to pull me out of the Great Hall.

            “Yeah...let’s not talk about that.”

            I rolled my eyes, deciding that I didn’t want to know.

            Waving, James and I left the Great Hall.

            “James that’s a lot of chocolate,”  I said dubiously as James grabbed every single one of my favourite chocolate bars...times about ten.

            “Well, don’t girls like chocolate?”

            “Yes but-“

            “And last I heard you were really pissed off that Professor Shacklebolt only gave our essay an ‘E’.”

            I laughed, “yeah, really pissed off, but James usually one chocolate bar does it.  Not the entire stock.”  James looked down at his bundle unabashedly.

            “Weasley/ Potter portions.  You’ll get used to it.” 

            I laughed.

            James paid for the chocolate grabbed the (heavy) shopping bag and then grasped my hand. 

            We had gone to the Three Broomsticks, Weasley’s Wizard Weazes (out of family obligation I was told, but I think James just wanted free merchandise), and Honeydukes.  So really, we had encompassed what a Hogsmeade visit should be for a Howarts student.  I say we did it brilliantly, but that’s just me.

            James steered me towards the Shrieking Shack and I immediately got a sense of foreboding.  Something settled in the pit of my stomach- heavy and choking.  I tried to shake the feeling away and focus as James prattled on about the Shrieking Shack (which was now a monument).  In all fairness, James knew more about the history than most scholars.  Only fair seeing how his dad was involved in every story.  We settled ourselves on a large boulder that overlooked the shrieking shack.

            “You okay?” James asked, probably noticing my worried expression.  I looked at him. 

            “I don’t know.  I just have this weird feeling.  It’s probably nothing.”

            “Chocolate?”  James asked.

            I laughed, “chocolate.”  He offered me a bar, and I broke off a piece. 

            “When I was little- before I knew I was a witch, I really was this odd little thing. I used to read stories about magic and fairytales and I always wished they were true, you know?  I had so many dreams.  Then I found out who I really was, and I came here and I learnt the most beautiful magic.  It’s everywhere.  If I ever get the chance, I want to thank your dad.  It might be corny, but if he hadn’t done what he did, I probably wouldn’t be here.”

            “Yeah, my dad gets that a lot,” James said.  I shook my head.

            “That’s not the only reason I’d want to thank him.”

            “What else would you want to thank him for?”  James asked, confused.  I only smiled secretively in response, because really, how could you say For having you and raising you in a casual conversation?

            As the sky began to darken, neither of us moved unwilling or unable to break the comforting silence that settled upon us.

            “We should probably get back to the castle, have some dinner,”  James suggested. I nodded, and stood before offering my hand to James to help him up.  He grinned at me wryly.

            “I don’t think you’re strong enough for that move.  Furthermore, I’d like to think I’m a big boy.”

            I raised my eyebrows as if to say- Wanna try me?

            He laughed and allowed me to “help” him up before we both trudged up the road that led to Hogwarts.

            As soon as we arrived in The Great Hall- everyone seemed to freeze.  James and I looked at each other.

            “What’s going on?”  I whispered. 

            “I have no idea,”  James replied. 

            Why is everyone looking at me?  My eyes scanned the Gryffindor table, landing on the section of red heads.  Every single one of them seemed to have tears in their eyes.  I took a step back at their forlorn expression. 

            “Miss Anderson, could I please talk to you for a moment?”  a voice asked from behind me.  I turned to see Headmaster Grieves.  I looked at James, a bad feeling settling in my stomach.

            “It’s my mum isn’t it.”  It wasn’t a question.

            Grieves nodded.

            “Lexie, I am so sorry,” Grieves said as tears started to pour down my face.  James gathered me in a hug just as I started to sob.  Both the Headmaster and James led me out of the Great Hall and towards the Headmaster’s office.

            After we entered Grieves’s office, he conjured a sofa for James and I to sit on. 

            “How did everyone else find out?”  I croaked.

            “Your mother’s hospital sent you a letter.  Your dorm mates opened it and read it to the Great Hall.”  I nodded.

            “Was she in pain when she-“

            “No, she passed away in her sleep.”  I nodded again.

            “I need to go, I need to go plan her funeral, go see her I just.  I need to go,”  I said, rattled.  James held me tighter.

            Grieves nodded.  “Of course, I’ll just let you two say your goodbyes.”  The headmaster left, and I stood and walked towards the fireplace.

            “Wait, I’m coming with you,”  James said, standing and walking towards me.  I stopped and looked at him.

            “This is something I need to do on my own.”

            “Lexie, I’m not letting you bury your mum alone,” James objected.

            “I can do this.  I need time alone.”

            “Lexie, you don’t have to face the world alone.  I’m right here,”  James said, his voice cracking with emotion.  I smiled sadly.

            “I know James.”

            “Then let me come.”  I shook my head.

            “I’m not going to burden you anymore than I already have,”  I said as tears started to roll down my cheeks.  As much as it pained me, I knew I needed to do this alone. I couldn’t explain it.

            “Lexie, it’s not a burden.  At least let me come to the funeral.”

            “I’ll owl you okay?”

            “Promise?”  James asked.

            “I promise.”  James nodded before gathering me in a hug and kissing the top of my head.  I closed my eyes for a moment, before pulling away.


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