Chapter 1 : Unlucky.
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hi hi. this is a one-shot based on the song by Panda, "Los Malaventurados No Lloran". Yes, its a spanish song :p but its awesome. If you understand spanish I recommend you to listen to it. If you don't understand spanish... it doesnt matter still listen to it since the beat is pretty cool :D its awesome that such a cool beat can go perfectly with such a sad song. So here it is:
The Unlucky Never Cry.
I was always there by her side, gripping her hand, wiping away her sweat and her tears, kissing her forehead. Begging her to not give up on life. Begging her to be strong, for us. Begging her to survive through this so we could be together again. Begging her to remember those sweet kisses in the summer rain, down by the shore, when there wasn’t any way, death eaters, or mudbloods being captured all over the country for us to worry about. Always begging, begging, begging. But she just wasn’t strong enough. The pain, the sadness, the torture had become her reality, and she just couldn’t remember a time when we weren’t stuck on this darkness. She could not remember a time when the death eaters hadn’t caught up with us. She couldn’t take this much abuse for being different. It wasn’t her fault, it was racism. It was racism against anyone with a single trace of muggle blood in their veins. I wished I could have done something, anything so she wouldn’t have to suffer so much. But they picked on her more because her blood wasn’t pure, and in their priorities mudbloods always came before blood traitors. So they didn’t torture me as much, but they did. And it hurt like hell. And it was awful, but the worst was watching her life fade away in my face. She was wasting away in front of my eyes, and that hurt a million times more to watch than a hundred Cruciatus curses. And it hurt even more that I couldn’t do anything to help her.
I know she feels better.
She has to. Anyplace is way better than here while on the war. And I’m sure she’s someplace wonderful, in heaven perhaps. Someplace out of this world. She deserves the best. After so much suffering, so much pain, she needs relief, she needs peace. And I know I should feel happy for her, that the pain is gone, that she is not dying by my side, that she’s in a better place, but I can’t do it. I mean, I am, but it also hurts to think about it. I am so glad that she feels better. I know she does. And then I remember that she feels better because she’s not here, and I am; I’m drowning in my own pain and sorrow at her death. I lie down in my bed, my curtains drawn, and just stare into space. The hours drag on, I’m never sure when its day or when its night anymore. I have lost notion of time, just like she did. The only thing I can feel is this huge gaping hole in my chest apart from the nothingness, apart from the fact that nothing in my life is real, leaving me with no respiration and just depression. It’s hard to eat. It’s hard to stand up. All my life has become is this mattress, this dark room, and that picture of both of us, the only decoration in my nightstand. We are down by the lake. She waves at me, and I kiss her cheek. And every time I look at it tears slide down my face, because I know I’ll never see her wave at me again. I’ll never see that beautiful smile that used to light up my day again. I hadn’t seen it in a while. I know she’s gone, and she isn’t coming back for me, like she promised. The war ending may have started life again to many, but it ended mine. She is gone, just another lifeless body among many others, and there’s nothing I can do about it. I never kept the promise I made her, as she didn’t keep hers. She said she would come back, and I said I would keep her safe. But now she’s dead.
I wanna find a way to talk to her. I have to. I need to see her again, kiss her again, hold her in my arms again and never let go. I need to smell the sweet scent of her perfume and her distinct aroma that was always present, giving me hope. I wanna tell her that everything’s worse. While everyone is rising from the ashes and broken homes Voldemort left behind, I am just swirling downwards this bottomless well of endless blackness. She was my light. She was the light switch of my wall, but now that she’s gone, my life has gone dark. It has lost any meaning it had at all, now that my family is gone too. I wanna tell her that just like her, my willpower is gone. That just like her on the last few months of her life, I don’t wanna live anymore. That I wish someone would come and finish the job. I wanna tell her all about how everything’s wrong now. I wanna tell her that I would catch up with her if I had the chance. I miss her so much. I love her so much. But she’s gone.
thoughts? Please review! :)
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