Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the wizarding world are the sole property of J.K. Rowling. I own nothing except my own ideas, and make no profit. No copyright infringement is intended.
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A mighty pain to love it is,
And 'tis a pain that pain to miss;
But of all pains, the greatest pain
It is to love, but love in vain.
- Abraham Cowley
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The fire was crackling merrily in the grate. I averted my gaze from it, my eyes roving around the room as my brain ticked overtime.
I was thinking of her again.
Cho Chang.
I had seen her before. She was pretty, I suppose, and older. In my opinion she was a selfish cow.
She had led him on, then chosen Diggory. There were no second chances. But he obviously didn't think that. Cho didn't really care. Not like I did. Cho had only met him last year; him, with his deep green eyes and welcoming smile. He was so brave, so loyal, so wonderful.
I had known him ever since Ron had started at Hogwarts. I knew him, inside and out. I had fought by his side, talked to him, laughed with him. But, as these things often go, I am not known as a pleasant fourth year. I am only known as Ron's little sister.
I won't disregard myself; I am not ugly. However freckles and red hair are not the most beautiful things to look upon. I doubt anyone has ever stared at him the way I do. Not that he notices.
Hermione told me to move on, that it was just a crush. I tried, honestly, I did. I have dated but most relationships end quickly. I liked lots of the boys I went around with, truly, I did, but it was nothing compared to how I feel about him. It doesn't feel like just a childish crush. It is passion, fire, burning.
Dating others only provides distraction. I have smelt Amortentia, I have inhaled the scent of him. It is all I smell, now. My family is no help either. They say young love doesn't matter. I think they are just to old to remember.
All I can rely upon is my imagination. I do have daydreams, where mostly unpleasant things happen to Cho or he swoops in and saves me. Sometimes I feel like one of those useless heroines in romance novels, waiting for him ever since first year. I was silly, then. I had no one to talk to, so I stupidly took solace in an enchanted diary. He rescued me though, and forgave me.
I have a feeling that he knew that I liked him; but probably thought it would be best to ignore it. It would of been awkward, I admit, to be dating your best friend's little sister. He probably thinks, by now, that these feelings have faded. They haven't; I have just gotten better at hiding them.
I have been spending more time with him, indirectly. The DA meetings have been interesting, though slightly sickening when he fawns over Cho. I've impressed him I think, with my knowledge of spells. I hope so, anyway. Though he was probably so transfixed by Cho with her stupid silky hair and china doll features.
I settle my gaze on the Golden Trio, laughing by the fireside. I will get him, one day. I promise myself this. Because after the petty teenage love he has for Cho fades away, I'll be there. I'll always be there. Waiting in the wings and biding my time.
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