I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I mean I didn’t exactly ask Mastriva to drug my boyfriend and take advantage of him and I didn’t ask that Lily and Remus completely cut Mastriva out of their lives. Of course I wouldn’t exactly have smiled at the thought of having to spend extra time with the B.A.B.S.S. (Backstabbing Attempted Boyfriend Stealing Slag).
Sirius was dealing with it alright. He, of course, woke up the next morning groggy but after he was awake for a bit he spent the rest of the day trying to apologize as much as he could. Eventually I had to grab him by the shoulders and tell him, “Love, I get it. It’s not your fault. Mastriva hoodwinked both of us, stop blaming yourself.”
That seemed to calm him down a bit, allowing him to converse about things other than his guilt. Honestly I didn’t hold him responsible for anything that had happened that night. Sure, at first when I saw them for a split second I did think that it was mutual. Of course, what would any other girl think if they saw their boyfriend in bed with another woman? For a moment I blamed him, but my logic soon took over and I quickly realized that the only one to blame was B.A.B.S.S. What was I going to do about her? Completely tear her apart.
Sure I’ve done my bit of revenge. Maybe the whole “let’s-be-friends-with-complete-bitches-to-get-back-at-my-real-friends-who-made-me-angry” wasn’t the best plan and it ended badly. The difference here was this was about Sirius. She was trying to take him away from me, awakening an inner sleeping bitch that no person in their right mind would bring about themselves. If she didn’t have to cry herself to sleep at night then I wasn’t satisfied.
Yes, my approach was going to be drastic. Yes, it was going to be severely sadistic and yes, there was going to be violence and reputation ruining involved. Why? Because she hurt Sirius. She drugged him, used him and tried to make it look like it was all his idea. Pathetic slag, she didn’t know what she was getting herself into. If there was one thing that I had been taught by my suicidal Auror mother it was that protecting your loved ones always takes top priority. It ranks higher than pride, convenience and legal justification. No, I wasn’t going to kill her or use any of the Unforgiveables on her. No, I was going to make it much more painful for her.
I didn’t tell anyone of my plan because I knew they’d try to talk me out of it. Lily wasn’t exactly advocating that I should even get any revenge towards her and I knew B.A.B.S. was still a sore topic for Remus. James would be interested in my plan but it involved girl warfare, a kind of attack that he knew nothing about, and Sirius was best just recuperating. No, this was something I had to do on my own.
“So you’re not mad at me, right?” Sirius questioned for the seventh time that day.
I groaned, “How many times are you going to ask me that, Sirius? No, I’m not angry at you for what happened with Mastriva.”
“You seem angry,” he pointed out.
“Okay, fine, yes, I’m really irate about the whole situation, but not at you. Love, how many times do I have to tell you that this wasn’t your fault?”
He sighed, adjusting himself on the hospital bed so he was looking straight up at the ceiling instead of at me. “It’s just- It’s just that I feel awful for what you had to go through. First for what you had to see and then for what I did to you.” His eyes darted back at me, grazing over the rather nasty looking bruise that was turning a disgusting shade of green that he had left on my cheek.
“Sirius, you weren’t exactly thinking properly when that happened. You can’t hold yourself accountable for what happened that night.”
He looked at me, the same guilty look still on his face, “I hit you, Sophie. How many boyfriends can say that about their girlfriends in good conscience? I slept with Ana Mastriva and you had to walk in on it. I don’t even know how you can look me in the eye after what I did.”
I sighed, leaning over and grabbing him by the chin. “Sirius Orion Black, if you don’t stop apologizing for what wasn’t your fault I’m going to take a severing charm to you and shave you bald. I’m only going to tell you one more time so you better listen. I love you. I trust you more than anyone in the world and I know that you would never hurt me. Even if for one moment I was too slow to realize what had happened and thought that you were sleeping with her on your own free will I soon came to my senses because I know that even if you wanted her more than me that you’d have the decency to break things off with me before you went after her. She’s a backstabbing slag who just happened to get her hand on a few too many potions and this isn’t your fault anymore than it is mine. As to being able to look you in the eye, I just look at it as two completely different people who just happened to look familiar. It’s like you having an evil twin or something.”
He laughed, “Alright, alright, I get it. I’ll stop apologizing. And just so you know I don’t have an evil twin.”
“Good to know.”
“Soph, in all honesty what are you planning on doing to Ana?”
Hm, do I tell him? Do I not? Have we come past the point where he’d think I was a crazy, possessive girlfriend? Would he accept it or try to talk me out of it? “Well, love, I can only be honest with you and say that I plan to destroy her from the inside out.” Well obviously my brain’s indecision hadn’t been relayed to my mouth that was talking automatically.
“Sophie, don’t you think that’s a bit drastic? You could get in a load of trouble,” he told me.
I rolled my eyes, “Don’t care. As long as I don’t do anything drastic enough to get me expelled or carted away to Azkaban I’ll survive.”
“But what if you get detention all the time and I never get to see you?” he protested, sticking out his bottom lip. “It’s bad enough having to share you with Lily and Fawn but if I have to share you with McGonagall or Dumbledore I might as fold now.”
He was right in that sense. He really was being robbed of valuable alone time with his girlfriend without there being a significant amount of detentions involved.
“Fine,” I guiltily submitted. “I won’t do anything to B.A.B.S.S. if she doesn’t do anything else that would require violence or severe reputation destroying.”
“B.A.B.S.S.?” he questioned.
I blushed slightly, forgetting that my secret code name had been in fact secret. “Backstabbing Attempted Boyfriend Stealing Slag.”
He erupted into a fit of laughter, letting the entire Hospital Wing ring out with bark-like laughs that got us quite a few irritated looks from Madam Pomfrey. “That’s bloody hilarious,” he managed to tell me through his tears.
“Oh yeah one of my best friends being a backstabbing slag who drugged and took advantage of my boyfriend is such a riot,” I drily retorted with a bit of a sneer.
He sobered up immediately, “Pet, I didn’t mean-“
I waved him off, “I know. I’m sorry. It’s just I’m so angry that I want to rearrange her entrails and I can’t and it makes me even more irate.”
“Sophie-“ he began to try to calm me.
Yet again I just wave off his attempt, “Don’t worry about it. I’m sure Mastriva will just fall through the crack of skanks and I won’t have to deal with her again.”
“Don’t you the Backstabbing Attempted Boyfriend Stealing Slag?” he smirked at me.
I rolled my eyes, pulling the pillow at from underneath his head and giving him a good hard smack with it. “You’re lucky you’re cute or I would have binned you weeks ago.”
He grinned, tearing the pillow away from me. “Oh and how does you being hopelessly in love with me work into that?”
“Who says I was in love with you?” I retorted with a playful smile.
His eyes got a mischievous look in them, “What did you just say, Sophie Marie Sapoulus Knight?”
“You heard me,” I replied, crossing my arms in front of my chest challengingly.
In one swift fluid movement he pulled me out of my chair and threw me next to him on the bed. Before I could even scold him for exerting himself too much while on the mend he pinned me underneath him, using his pounds of more muscle against me, holding my arms above my head. “Well then I’m just going to have to ravish you until you change your mind then,” he informed me in a low voice that sent shivers along my spine.
“Sirius,” I began managed to whisper, minor panic and excitement taking over me.
“Sh,” he hushed me, lustfully observing my face.
“Sirius, if Madam Pomfrey catches us she’ll never let me back to see,” I managed to tell him, keeping my voice even.
“If she catches us it’ll be the closest thing she’s had to play in years,” he replied coolly. “Trust me, if she walks in she’ll be thanking us for getting her closer to shagging than she could have hoped to for this decade.”
“Oh so she’s into voyeurism, is she?” I played along, deciding to argue with him about the matron’s sexual preferences.
He nodded, “Why else would she be a Healer instead of being out there in the world where she could actually you know find someone for her?”
“Hm, well then she must be a pedophile too, huh? If she likes working in a school and seeing naked children,” I suggested.
“Hey, stop trying to distract me. I’m supposed to be ravishing you until you realize you’re in love with me, remember?”
“Sex doesn’t make people love you, pet.”
“I didn’t say I was going to shag you to make you fall in love with me. I’m simply not going to stop shagging you until you realize that you’re already in love with me.”
“Oi, there shall be no shagging of my little sister,” I heard James indignantly protest as he came over to Sirius’ bed, carrying a sack. “Especially not in public places, Padfoot. She’s at least got a little honor left to preserve.”
I rolled my eyes, throwing the pillow at him, “Bugger off, Potter. This is a private party and you weren’t invited.”
He stuck his tongue out at me after the hospital pillow bounced off his forehead. “Fine. I just come bearing edible food from the kitchens, considering that Pomfrey likes to starve her patients out with tasteless mounds of what used to be food.” He threw the sack onto the foot of Sirius’ hospital bed. “I’m going to go visit with Lily and beg for forgiveness again. If I hear even the creak of the mattress or a noise resembling a moan I’m going to send you into a coma, Padfoot, and Sophie is going to get transferred to Beauxbatons so fast it’ll make her head spin.”
“If you get me transferred to Beauxbatons there might not be any male students for me to sleep with but there are male professors,” I told him with a sickly sweet smile.
Both James and Sirius looked awestruck. Their expressions quickly turned to scowls, the more intense coming from said boyfriend. “I’m going to get you a chastity belt if you don’t stop talking like that,” James threatened.
“And I’m going to get you a leash,” Sirius chimed in.
“Yeah that’s brilliant coming from a dog,” I retorted, batting my eyes at him innocently.
Sirius’ expression stayed dark, his arms crossed in front of him with a very angry look on his face. I rolled my eyes at James, who then chose that opportunity to scurry off. “Sirius, love, I was only joking. I’m not sleeping with any professor nor do I plan to.”
He let out an “hmpf” that I didn’t know if it meant that he didn’t believe me or if he was too upset to care. I sighed, deciding it was time to bring the big guns out. “Baby, you know I love you and you obviously know how I feel about cheating from what happened with the Slag Incident. I was only trying to get James’ goat. I didn’t mean it, pet.”
He was still acting like a big pouting three year old. “Didn’t sound like you were kidding.”
I groaned, “What do I have to say or do to make you believe that I’m not planning on shagging any of the professors?”
He turned to me, looking at me in a very indecisive manner and for a moment I was worried if he’d even give me a chance to make it up to him. “I want to see.”
“See what? Last thing I’d heard you weren’t temporarily blind.”
“No. You called me a dog but I still don’t know what you are. I want to know what you are.”
“Oh.” Of course he’d still want to see my animagus form. I looked around, trying to see if there would be enough of an opening in the curtain that someone would be able to see. After all I was only illegally an animagus and had no intention of going to Azkaban. I shut my eyes for a moment, concentrating on the task ahead, feeling myself shrink as my bushy tail appeared.
“Aw,” Sirius’ eyes were big and wide like a woman looking at an adorable baby. “You’re so cute.”
I gave a playful nip at his fingers and he laughed at me. “Well aren’t you feisty, you little vixen?!”
I nuzzled his arm, wrapping my long furry body around his neck. There was something about being in my animagus form that made me act more like a dog than a human, which was odd because though my animagus was of the canine family I was most definitely not a dog.
“Alright that’s it, Black, I’m tired of listening to you talk about Sophie like that and if you call her a ‘vixen’ one more time I’ll-“ James head snapped through the curtain. He stopped at the middle of his sentence, his eyes wide. “What is that?”
“Oh Prongs, I’m sorry I thought you’d met Sophie Knight, the girl you consider your little sister,” Sirius replied with a bit of a smirk.
“Is that in her-? She’s a-“
“Vixen, yes. Isn’t she adorable?” Sirius gave my chin a scratch.
“Wow, I never thought I’d say this but my little sister is a fox…”
I unwrapped myself from my boyfriend’s neck, stretching out on my previous spot on the bed. With a quick thought about being human again my tail disappeared and I gained a few inches. “Don’t look so surprised. What did you think I turned into?”
James just shook his head in disbelief before returning back to Lily’s bedside. “Well that sets one thing straight,” Sirius commented.
“Really? And what would that be?”
“You’re much too adorable to shag. I should instead find you a nice bonnet and drive you around in a baby carriage.”
My eyes slit as he began to laugh. “Well good because I’ve now decided that my life goal is to make sure you remain celibate until you die,” I retorted.
“Aw, Soph,” he tried to reason with me. “I’m just joking. Even if you can be the most adorable little fox I’ve ever seen you’re still 110% shaggable. Besides the canine side of me finds that bushy tail of yours very sexy.” He gave me a wink.
I rolled my eyes, “Stop talking before I have no choice but to smother you in your sleep with your own pillow.”
He let out a bark-like laugh, “Well, vixen, shrew, I bet either one of them would have fit your personality.”
“Yeah, so hilarious,” I replied drily. “You just keep laughing about that until you’re living in some alley with only a stag, a werewolf, a rat and fleas for friends.”
“Aw, Sophie, did I hit a nerve?”
I had no choice but to stoop to a lower level, “Silencio,” I casted at him, causing him to go completely silent. I smiled as he mouthed words at me, an irritated look growing on his face. “Night lover, I think you need some rest,” I told him with a smirk before burying my head affectionately into his neck.
And with that I spent the rest of a rather enjoyable night with brooding yet silent boyfriend, wishing all men came with a “mute” button.
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