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Wall Flower by kirstenalanna
Chapter 7 : chapter six: first time
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 5

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"Looking at you,holding my breath, For once in my life,I'm scared to death, I'm taking a chance,letting you inside."

First Time- Lifehouse

Pacing was a good idea.  Pacing helped me control my thoughts.  Pacing made me feel like I was doing something.  Pacing seemed like a normal reaction for just a friend.  Pacing was a habit.  I always paced in the hospital whenever mum had to go through a procedure or something.

            Yeah, pacing has worked for me so far.

            “Lexie, he’s going to be fine.  Trust me.  He’s been through worse.”  I stopped pacing to look at Fred in horror.  His nonchalant expression made me panic. 

            “Good going, mate, way to freak her out,”  Albus said sarcastically.

            “At least he’s trying to reassure her,” Lily defended Fred weakly before turning to him to say, “Really Fred you need to work on that bit.”

            I was currently in the Gryffindor common room, by Madame Pomfrey’s orders.  James was currently in the hospital wing and Madame Pomfrey wouldn’t allow visitors.  Bloody Hag.  When was she going to retire from her tirade against friends of students in the hospital wing?  Doesn’t love heal?  You’d think that being able to see your mates while ill or injured you would heal better.  But no, she has to be all controlling.

            I was the first to reach James after the rather illegal and stupid run in with the bludger.  Madame Pomfrey was second.  Immediately she had him on a stretcher and in the hospital wing.  After settling James in, she gave me a calming draught and quickly kicked me out of the hospital wing, where I then resorted to pacing and trying to get in to see James. 

            It took Albus, Fred and Lily to drag me up to their common room. 

            So, I took to pacing and ringing my shaking hands nervously.  I would cry, but the bloody calming draught prevented that.  Albus, Fred and Lily were watching me apprehensively from the couches in front of the fireplace.

            James was in the hospital wing and had been for 5 hours.

            “I’ve never seen someone freak out this much for just a minor Quidditch injury.”  Lily and Albus threw several pillows at Fred.

            “Lexie isn’t just a friend, you idiot,” Albus said.  I looked at him in surprise.

            “Yes I am,” I said slowly.  Three sets of eyes looked at me dubiously.

            “We’re not stupid.”

            “Just because I’m a bloke doesn’t mean I can’t see things too.”

            “I may be a first year, but I wasn’t born yesterday.”


            “Alright correction: we’re really good friends and James is attractive.  I’m just really worried okay?  I want to see him!”  I said over emotionally, before it dawned on me what I had actually said.  Had I just admitted that I found James attractive to his sister, brother and cousin?  

            “Okay, Albus this is ridiculous.  I am most positive that she can be trusted.  James trusts her and look at her- she’s a mess!”

            “Hey!” I exclaimed.  Lily ignored me.

            “Go get the bloody cloak and sneak her in.”  Albus looked at me before nodding and stalking off towards the boy’s dormitories.

            “What’s going on?”  I asked curiously.  Lily beckoned me towards her.  I complied and sat down.

            “Albus is going to sneak you into the hospital wing.”


            “You’ll see,” Lily said mysteriously.

            Albus re entered the common room then.  Other than Fred, Lily, Albus and I, the common room was empty.  Albus seemed to realize this too, and pulled a silky material from under his sweatshirt.  My eyes widened when I saw it.

            “Is that a-“

            “Invisibility cloak?  Yes,” Fred interrupted me.  Albus pulled me from the couch and pulled the cloak over both of us.  Only a few inches shorter than James, he had to crouch down so our feet wouldn’t show.

            “Give James our love,” Lily said casually before turning towards the girl’s dormitories. 

            Albus led me out of the common room and down the corridor that would eventually take us to the hospital wing.  I crinkled my forehead in confusion.  We were taking the long way.

            “Albus, it’s faster if we go that way,” I whispered, pointing in the opposite direction.

            “I know, but Filch usually patrols that corridor.”


            It was silent for the rest of the walk to the hospital wing.  Once we were inside, Albus looked around to make sure no one else was present.  Satisfied, he pulled the cloak off us at which point I walked towards the cot with all the privacy screens.

            James was sleeping on the cot, and I was relieved to see that he was still breathing.  I sat down in the chair beside his cot and grasped his hand.

            “I’ll just wait outside, yeah?”

            “Thanks Albus,” I whispered, my eyes not leaving James’ face.

            Once Albus was gone, I took a deep breath.  A lock of James’ hair had fallen into his face and I pushed it away gently.

            “Hmm,” James groaned.  I halted my movements and my heart rate picked up.

            “James?” I whispered.  James groaned again, before opening his eyes.

            “Lexie?” he whispered hoarsely.  I laughed quietly with relief. 

            “Oh thank Merlin you’re alright!”

            “Of course I’m alright,”  James said.

            I shook my head.  “I was so worried.  That bludger hit you so hard!”  My voice squeaked and I realised, much to my horror that I was crying again.  “And then Madam Pomfrey wouldn’t let me see you.”

            “Are you crying?”

            “Of course I am!  You scared me to death!  Madam Pomfrey had to give me a calming draught and everything.”  James smiled, seeming to take pleasure in my pain.

            “Not even my mum gets this worried after I hurt myself.”

            “Shut up.”

            “Don’t worry.  I’m fine.  I didn’t even have to take Skelegrow this time, which is a plus.”

            “Thanks a lot, by the way.” 

            James looked at me curiously.  “For what?”

            “Now, I’m going to have to go to Quidditch every time you play, otherwise I’ll be a nervous wreck imagining you falling to your death.” 

           James smirked.  “That was part of my evil plan all along.”

            I squeezed his hand tightly, and noted with satisfaction that he did the same.

            “Jackass,”  I laughed.

            “Anyway, I should be out tomorrow.  Just in time for Quidditch practice.”

            “I hate you,”  I muttered. 

            James laughed. “No you don’t.”      

            You have no idea, James.  No really, you don’t. 

            We talked for awhile longer before Albus joined us and ushered me under the cloak.  I waved at James before disappearing.

            Albus walked me back to my own common room.  After he dropped me off, the only think I could think was how utterly and positively screwed I was.

            Because, I had to become the biggest girl of this century and fall in love with James Potter.  Bloody bleeding hell.


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