Chapter 29 : Therapy, Wally, Hair Care And Me
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Authors Note - Hello! How are you all? Well, I hope? I’m sorry this has taken so long. I’m trying to update more this year. College is such a killer; I don’t want to write essays about exotics. It’s boring. Then I got addicted to friends, I have watched all ten series in like a week. What’s your favourite season? Mine is three, all the way. I hope you’re having a great year so far.
Thanks for all the support guys; this chapter would have never got completed without you. I’ve reached 1100 reviews and I am amazed. It means a lot to me that you take your time to leave a review. I’ve got over 800 favourites; you guys are too amazing. So I thank you. Also every chapter has a chapter image now! Check them out, they are beautiful. The people at TDA are geniuses.
Not a lot of things happen in this chapter but thirty is a big one! I just needed this chapter to build up to big old thirty. I'm not really a fan of this update, but you don't deserve to wait any longer.
If you like next generation stories, especially Albus/Oc stories, please check out my new story The Human Factor. I’m really excited about it! It’s on my page if you’re interested.
I hope you like this chapter. It’s for you.
Comments and opinions are welcome. Also what you think will happen next is always fun :D Reviews are brain food.
Therapy, Wally, Hair Care And Me
The sun shone lightly outside as I sat on the window ledge. I pulled a blanket closer to me. It had been a rough night. Izzie had only just managed to fall asleep and it was now about seven in the morning. I glanced at her; for once she seemed peaceful and torment was absent from her face. I thought that this might be a sign that Izzie was beginning to heal a little bit. I felt that we’ve all been stuck in limbo and we could only come out properly once we were all together again. Stupid Sirius and stupid coma.
Lily too was in a deep undisturbed sleep. I smiled; a good night’s sleep had become rare recently. It felt normal to smile again. Sometimes I felt guilty for living, while others weren’t so lucky but I buried that guilt deep. Like centre of the earth deep.
I began writing a long over due letter to my parents. I had tried this letter several times and it just wouldn’t come out right.
Dear Mum and Dad
I’m sorry it’s been so long. I’ve tried to write this letter several times, but nothing seems to fit properly. So much has happened, a lot of things I don’t even want to admit have happened.
I miss you. I miss you a lot actually.
Sirius is in a coma. It’s horrible because I feel like I put him there. I’m sure you’ve heard of the attack on Hogsmeade. Well, I was part of that group of Hogwarts students the paper eluded too. It was meant to be a celebration of Lily’s birthday but it ended up being a disaster. The Death Eaters attacked us, I got distracted in the middle of the fight and Sirius came to my rescue. Only we ended up getting blasted through a wall.
Remember when I complained about stubbing your toe being one of the worst pains? It’s nothing compared to being thrown into a wall and having debris break your arm and leg. Both are fine by the way. I’m fine. No lasting damage, but Sirius mama… If I hadn’t been distracted, he wouldn’t be lying there right now like a zombie.
I hate it. Everything is messed up and I don’t know to fix anything. I just wish it could all be simple again. I’m okay though, so don’t be worried! Izzie’s fine too, she’s currently sleeping. She’s probably dreaming of socks or something.
I miss you both and I love you.
I hope you’re safe.
I sighed; this letter would just have to do. I didn’t know what to include and what not to. I didn’t know whether I should have lied or told the truth. I didn’t know whether I was right in even sending the letter at all; my parents have enough stresses and I shouldn’t be one of them. At this moment, they were fighting for their right to survival.
I needed them to know though. My parents always knew how to make me feel better. Whether I was upset over a silly comment about my looks or I had fallen over my laces. My parents just knew.
I rolled up the parchment before going to have a shower. I had this deep feeling that it was going to be a long day; I had people to check on. After James had shouted at me, I became obsessed with looking after everyone.
I would read fairy tales to Izzie until she fell asleep and soothe her when the nightmares become too much. When a first year cut her hand and there was blood; I held Lily’s hand until she stopped shaking. When Remus wanted a distraction from the upcoming full moon, I made him read out loud to me; his voice was a calming melody. I played chess with Peter for hours and I lost every single game. Although that wasn’t on purpose; I was just generally rubbish at chess. With James, I just let him talk; about Sirius, about his life and the future. The future was my favourite; it showed that James still had hope. I gave Sirius Mr. Snuggles Le Fuggles La Muggle, my ugly bear. I had placed him on Sirius’ side table. This way, if Sirius woke up when I wasn’t there, at least he’d know I had been there. I was okay with doing all of this because helping them was fixing me, bit by bit. I didn’t feel completely useless anymore for starters.
After I showered and dressed. I checked on my friends one last time; both were still asleep. I left a small note to tell them I was going to breakfast. I hummed softly to myself as I walked towards the great hall. As I walked, I noticed I was being slightly scrutinized. A battle with Death Eaters had given me a popularity perk. Only no one tried to be my friend; people kept a clear distance between me and them.
They all probably thought I’d put them in a coma.
All people now did was whisper when I walked past. It’s been weeks. There have been more attacks; I would have thought they’d move onto that, but apparently no.
I was a little grumpy this morning.
“Hey Nellie!” James yelled as I waited for him to catch up with me. “I thought it was you.”
I laughed. “James, there isn’t anyone who you can mistake for me.”
James nodded. “That is true.”
“How are you this morning?” I asked gently, with a smile.
James smiled back. “I feel better this morning.” I didn’t even trace a lie in that sentence. “How are you?” James even seemed like he had taken a bath lately. He didn’t look neat, but he didn’t look like he’d slept in a bush either.
“I’m tired.” I yawned. “I didn’t get much sleep last night; Izzie and Lily were still asleep so I just left them.” I rubbed my belly. “I’m so hungry.” I said as we reached the Great Hall and sat down at the Gryffindor table. I instantly started to load up my plate with food. “Have you had that therapy session yet?” I knew the answer to my question but James said nothing to me after his session. Izzie was in a bad mood after hers, because according to her he was ‘sunshine’ and ‘sunshine’ is her poison. I was going to ask how she managed to put up with me but she was almost foaming out of the mouth in anger and I got frightened. The whole attack may have softened her a little, but she still had a mean left and right hook.
“Yeah, I have.” James swallowed his toast as I waited for him to elaborate. “He’s okay; I don’t really get the point of it. I always worry, he’s tricking me.” James paused for a moment. “Like he says pick a pebble out of the bowl and I worry I’m giving away something I don’t want to share.”
“I suppose it’s scary when someone understands how to get inside your head and can also make sense of it all.”
“That’s true.” James agreed. “I think you’ll like him though; he’s a lot like you.” I raised my eyebrow a little at him. There was someone like me? That’s interesting. “Imagine you as a bloke and you’ve got Wally.”
I giggled. “His name is Wally?” I can’t take some seriously with the name Wally.
“Yes; apparently he’s the best in the business.” James checked his watch shrugging. “It’s almost time for you to go.”
I stuffed the rest of my breakfast in my mouth and grabbed some toast to go. “Thanks. I’ll see you later.” James smiled at me. “I’ll tell you how it goes.”
“Good luck Nellie.”
I left the great hall and strolled casually to Wally’s office as I munched on my toast. I was astounded to find that Wally’s office was a cupboard.
I stood outside the cupboard for a while; nerves were rising in my chest. The door had a white piece of paper tacked to the door. It was crooked and it had the words ‘Wally’s Therapy’ drawn on in purple crayon. Wally seemed to be the sort of person whom if they had I’s in their name would put a heart above it. I went through a phase where I drew kangaroo’s over the I’s in my name. I gave it up after three minutes because I have too many I’s in my name. Plus, I can’t draw a kangaroo.
So, in all essence, it was doomed from the start.
I knocked the door. A man, in his late twenties came to the door. He was grinning at me with wide eyes. He ushered me to sit down on a chair. He too sat down in a chair opposite. A cat jumped onto his lap. It was a ginger, fluffy thing. It was ugly and I love animals.
Wally noticed me staring at his cat. “His name is Gumble.” I nodded and we sat there in silence until Wally spoke again. “So,” He grinned. “Tell me about yourself.”
I just sat there, thinking for a moment as the hyper man grinned manically at me. For someone who has to listen to someone’s woes, he’s a little too happy. I mean, who decorates a room with party stuff? I’m going to therapy, not a disco. Then again, it’s probably something I’d do. Gumble sat on his lap, glaring at me through his yellow evil eyes. I glared back fiercely at Gumble and I got no weird look from Wally. He was just staring at me with an eager expression on his face. Oh, he wanted me to start talking then.
How should I start? How do you sum up yourself?
Hmm. I best start with my name.
“They call me Nellie. It‘s my birth name. I think, I‘ve never checked my birth certificate. So I could really be called Lulu and I wouldn‘t know.” He nodded. “And I have hair that has volume. Too much one would say.”
“That is interesting.” Wally said before rubbing his cheek. “Is the volume all natural? I mean, I've been trying to get mine to have more va va voom but it's just not working out.” He ran his fingers through his hair. He was right, it was lifeless.
I thought I'd never see the day where someone is asking me for hair tips. Maybe I'm dreaming? Maybe I'm in a parallel world but whatever is happening, it's weird.
“Have you tried a hair dance?”
“Huh? What do you mean by hair dance?” He looked at me as if I were speaking French. Does Wally live in a box? I thought everyone knew about hair dances.
“Yes, Wally, a dance.” I told him. “It’s for your hair.” He still looked puzzled so I continued. “You stand up. Run your fingers through your hair, say a little prayer and shake it.”
I eyed him weirdly. “You know? When you move your hair from side to side with lots of energy?”
“That’s…interesting.” He stroked his chin. He should grow a beard; he’d look cool with a beard. “Anyway, Nellie, we’re getting slightly off track.” I hadn’t noticed. This therapy thing didn’t seem to be so bad; at least he hadn’t labelled me crazy yet. I didn’t know whether to be disappointed or proud. “Why do you think you’re here?”
“Maybe because I wanted to celebrate my best friend’s birthday getting drunk?” Izzie was rubbing a little too much on me.
Wally smiled playfully. “It said in your notes that you’re not eighteen yet…”
“Yes, I drink illegally, as do most teenagers.” I grumbled. “It’s not like I’m an alcoholic or anything like that, I don’t have an alcoholic beverage with my breakfast.” I’m more partial for orange juice. “I just drink on special occasions.” I didn’t want to mention that I also went to the pub when I felt upset but that’s not my fault; Izzie dragged me.
That’s what I’ll claim until I’m sectioned anyway.
“Plus,” I continued. “I’m seventeen, not twelve. Give me a break, mom.” My mood was turning, I started off on a slight high and now I felt myself rapidly spiralling. I blamed Wally and I blamed my life.
After that night with Izzie, I had stopped bottling all my emotions. There was plus and cons to this. I didn’t feel like I was going to combust into flames any at moment but it also meant that my moods changed in nanoseconds.
I had become extremely volatile or maybe I always was.
I wasn’t sure.
“I didn’t mean to offend you, Nellie.” Wally backtracked and so he should; I was offended. “It was a joke. I’m here to help you and not to judge you.”
Wally hummed for a moment before finally saying. “Why don’t you talk to me about your friends?”
“Izzie has been my best friend for seven years and for a long time, my only friend.” I told him. “But this year happened and I’ve managed to gain five more friends.” Wally nodded, urging me on but I didn’t really need it. I enjoy talking. I enjoy talking and having someone listen. “There is Lily, who makes us a really diverse hair group. She’s a red head, Izzie has black hair and I’m blonde, I’m sure you’ve noticed.” I pointed to my hair for emphasis. “Then there are the Marauders as they call themselves, James is just hilarious, Peter is so sweet, Remus is one of the kindest people I’ve ever met and Sirius?” I paused. The dull aching in my chest tightened. It always did whenever his name escaped my lips. “He took the rug from under my feet.”
“Sirius?” He looked down in his notes for a second. “Isn’t he the one in the coma?” He asked gently, as if I would explode, as if I would break. I wouldn’t. I was stronger than this.
“Yes.” I whispered hoarsely as I looked at my feet “He is.” I could do with cleaning my shoes; they were covered in mud. It’s funny; I don’t even remember walking in mud.
Wally nodded. “Is there something going on between you and Sirius?” I wondered how he knew.
Was I that easy to guess?
“No.” I wondered whether I wanted to tell him the story, whether I even wanted to remember the story. In the end, I chose to tell him. “I used to date Sirius’ brother, Regulus. We had a year long complicated and beautiful relationship.” It was also hideous at times too. “Regulus hasn’t given up on me and even now, I think I’m still a little in love with him because otherwise why can’t I let go?” Oh, how I wanted to…most of the time. “I got to know Sirius better and months later, he kissed me. Nothing ever happened though after that cause Sirius felt bad about his brother. Then Sirius went out with this girl called Sarah and I began a relationship with my now boyfriend, Lucas.”
I closed my eyes. I had been avoiding Lucas for weeks now. If I saw him coming, I would hide or run the other way. I knew soon though, he’d catch me and I had a feeling it wasn’t going to be pretty. I was supposed to be a Gryffindor, brave used to be in the blood but it had disappeared. I was now a coward. “It turns out that Sarah was only blackmailing him so now I look like a complete cow because I assumed.” I hoped Wally understood all this. “It’s complicated, I know.”
“That sounds very troubling.” He was trying to emphasize.
“It is. It’s mostly our own mess though.” I smiled for some reason. “Just a normal teenage life though. I mean give me a teenager who hasn’t got a bunch of complicated issues?”
Wally checked his watch. “That’s all we’ve got time for today, Nellie.” It was one of those moments where time seemed to have flown by. “I’d like to see you again. Would you like to see me the same time next week?”
“Alright.” I got up and let myself out of the cupboard. I didn’t know what to make of therapy. I didn’t know whether it was a good or bad thing. At the moment, it was just a thing. I leaned on the wall outside the cupboard for a long time before eventually sliding down to the floor.
Eyes closed shut, blocking out the world.
“Nellie.” I snapped out of my daydream. It was Izzie. I looked at her in a daze, unsure why she was here. She was excited. “It’s Sirius! He’s awake."
Oh my merlin.
…to be continued.
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