Chapter 1 : In Which Fred and George express doubts about Harry's chances of survival
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When Harry was sixteen, while he was recuperating after a random Death Eater blitz attack in Hogsmeade, Fred and George Weasley came to visit him in the Hospital Wing.
Their visit came as somewhat of a surprise to Harry, given their (rather spectacular) exit from Hogwarts the year before, although he supposed they had also come to visit Ron and Ginny, both of whom had been injured in the attack although, thankfully, not too seriously. After distributing their standard gifts of prank items from Weasley’s Wizarding Wheezes —Canary Creams, Self-Exploding Ink Balloons and Nosebleed Nougat—they had laughingly presented him with a rolled up piece of parchment.
Propping himself up against the scratchy, starched cotton pillows, Harry had taken the scroll from Fred’s hands and unrolled it, only to find that it was much longer than he had anticipated, with the end promptly dropping to the floor, unrolling as it went until it finally stopped some seven or eight feet from the bed.
“Harry Potter’s Bucket List” the parchment read, in large, bold purple letters across the top of the page. Beneath, in the twin’s surprisingly neat copperplate handwriting was a list of various tasks. Briefly scanning the parchment, Harry read the first few items on the list.
1. Streak across the Quidditch Field at the next Slytherin vs. Hufflepuff match.
2. Challenge Winky the House-Elf to a Butterbeer-drinking competition.
3. At the next Gryffindor game, refuse to fly in a straight line, instead, corkscrew and twirl as much as possible. Also, perform a Wronski Feint every five minutes, on the dot (assuming the snitch is not visible) ...just because I can.
4. Spend an entire day speaking in a foreign accent.
5. Hex the Slytherins so that they are unable to speak, but must instead sing with an accompanying interpretive dance routine.
“What’s this, then?” he asked, looking from one twin’s grinning face to the other.
“Well, you see, since you appear to be insistent upon looking for the best ways in which to off yourself—”, George began, in the tone of voice that was reminiscent of one of his mother’s lectures.
“—I don’t go looking—”
Fred cut him off “—then we thought the least we could do was ensure that you die knowing that you had accomplished something in your short and uneventful—“
--“some would say boring—” George interjected.
“—life.” Fred finished, with a grin. “Hence this list. On it, you will find a lengthy record of all the experiences George and I, in our own not-too-shabby existence on this planet, have deemed necessary for you to complete in order to feel...well...completed”.
Harry sighed, shaking his head in exasperation at the twin’s antics. “So, where did this idea come from? You two got one yourselves, then?”
Fred scoffed, while George shook his head in mock pity at Harry. “Us? Harry, my boy, we’ve got better things to do than place ourselves in unnecessary risks. We’ll leave that up to you. Our lives are far more important, too many young, impressionable and innocent minds out there to corru–er, educate and we intend on living long, full lives in order to do so, don’t we George?”
His twin had nodded seriously in agreement and, with one last shake of their identical, orange heads at Harry, they had left the Hospital Wing, throwing a “Bye, Popsical!” over their shoulders at Madame Pomfrey, emerging from her office to check on another patient in the wing and who had turned white with shock upon seeing the twins in her domain, thinking she had seen the last of them with their departure from the school.
Harry had chuckled at the twins’ extravagant departure and had thought nothing more of the list, except for a bit of laugh with Ron and Hermione when he was finally able to return to the Gryffindor Common Room the following evening.
But the look on Fred’s face when Harry had asked about their list would be one that would come back to haunt him for years to come.
Fred had died with the exact same mixed look of incredulity, surprise and laughter on his face, only a little over a year later.
A/N: I know certain events in this story aren’t exactly canon, but bear with me...there wasn’t really any other viable time when Harry truly was in the Hospital Wing that fit well enough for me.
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Info 22: For April fools 2005 Fred and George took over the site.
It could mean to have another look
It’s done after you’ve read a book
That might make you think; reread
There’s something right in that indeed