Chapter 3 : KA-POW!!
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"Take things as they are. Punch when you have to punch. Kick when you have to kick. ..."
Seven in the bloody morning. SEVEN in the bloody morning.
Need I mention I’m a very irritable woman? Like ‘I will rip your head off if you wake me up at seven in the bloody morning’ irritable.
“Deeeeeds!” Dorcas chirped in my ear.
Must fight urge to kill best friend.
“DEEEEDS!” Dorcas continued as she now began to poke me in the ribs continuously. “DEEE-”
“WHAT IN MERLIN’S NAME DO YOU WANT, YOU INSUFFERABLE OAF!” I screamed at her. I sat up and glared at the girl in question.
“Oh goodie, you’re up!” she exclaimed, clapping her hands and completely ignoring my angry outburst.
“What do you want?” I said through gritted teeth. Don’t put it pass me to not kill my best friend though, because it still could happen.
“Now you can see how bloody annoying that is when you wake me up,” Dorcas smirked, all perkiness gone. She sat at the foot of my bed, combing through her luscious caramel-coloured hair… Oh dear Merlin, did I just say luscious? I blame Mum and her stupid Muggle romance films… stupid bloody films and their too perfect relationships. I know for a fact that relationships are never perfect! Even when they are, they'll probably go to crap anyways.
“Oi! Will you stop doing that?” Dorcas cried out, waving her hands in front of my face.
I snapped back to focus. “Do what?”
“That… weird zoning out thing you do…” but as she noticed the blank stare on my face, she just threw her hands in the air. “Oh forget it, come on. Go get dressed. I have stuff to tell you about Benjy.”
I groaned. I loved Dorcas, but she had a tendency of giving out way too many details about boys I’d rather not know private stuff about. Yeah… awkward.
I pulled myself out of bed and made my way towards the bathroom, not before I shoved Dorcas onto the floor though. Stupid cow.
“Deora,” someone mumbled outside the door.
I spat out the toothpaste. “Yes?”
“Erm, you’ve locked the door again,” Mary mumbled. I quickly went over to let the girl in. Oops… I had a tendency of locking doors wherever I went, because of living with two nosy older brothers.
Mary walked in, her black hair tied up in a loose bun, and a smile on her lips. She was such a cute girl. If she would just let loose and stop being so shy, maybe she’d finally get that guy she’s been after for years (who, by the way, still remains unknown to all of us… she’s a damn good secret keeper.)
“Morning,” I smiled back.
“Morning, why are you up so early?” she asked curiously.
I nodded towards the oaf back inside our room. Mary turned around just in time to catch Dorcas doing some sort of jig while trying to put on a sock.
She giggled, “Oh, I see.”
“Yeah, the bloody idiot decided that seven was a perfectly acceptable time to be awake,” I moaned, while attempting to brush out the knots in my sleep-tousled hair.
“I’m always up at seven,” she pointed out.
“Yeah, but you’re a morning person, Mary,” I told her. “I am not.”
“No, she’s not,” Lily agreed, while yawning unattractively. If only James could see her now maybe he’d leave her alone.
She made her way into the now-cramped bathroom and turned to Mary. “Did you know in fourth year when I tried to wake her up for class, she elbowed me in the nose?”
I winced at the memory. “Sorry, Lily, totally by accident of course.”
“It’s alright, you made up for it by punching that prat, what was his name?” Lily laughed. “Oh whatever, he was a creep.” She then turned to me, “come to think of it, I don’t think you’ve gone an entire year since then without punching someone.”
“Yeah! Fifth year, you punched that Ravenclaw, Michael Huntington for grabbing your bum,” Mary giggled.
He was a pervert... I was minding my own bloody business and suddenly, some cheeky sixth year comes running by, grabs my arse and expects to get away with it! No sodding way, my friend, nah uh! You touch Deora Grunnion’s arse, you are going to get punched in the face!
KA-POW!!! (Courtesy of Albert’s comics…)
It was the most brilliant thing ever (minus the time I punched Avery)… he actually flew onto the ground, blood dripping down his nose, and a look of absolute terror in his eyes. I felt like that green Muggle comic guy… what was his… oh yeah! The Hulk!!
“And sixth year, you punched Avery, that Slytherin arse,” Lily said, gritting her teeth at the mention of his name, but then quickly added, “not that I approve violence in the castle!”
“Course you don’t,” I winked at her. She narrowed her eyes at me. “Yeah, well I had a good reason to punch Avery! He called me filthy for having a Muggle mum.”
“What!” they both exclaimed in unison.
“Yeah, it’s fine though, I broke his nose,” I grinned proudly.
“Okay, I approve of that punch,” Lily smiled back. “So are you planning on punching anyone this year? Not that I’d approve of it, of course.”
“Err… well,” I stammered. “I might have… already punched someone.”
“WHO!” they both cried out, again in unison… slightly freaky, but whatever.
“Sirius Black,” I grinned innocently before bolting out the bathroom.
“DEEORAA!” Lily cried out just as the door of the seventh year dormitory fell shut behind me.
It was sickening. People should not be allowed to perform such sickening things in front of the rest of the population. What if I choked on my own sick because of how sickening it was? What would she do then? No, my death would be all her fault, because she is subjecting me to a truly nauseating sight. What pray tell am I rambling about?
My best friend. Snogging the pants off of Benjy Fenwick.
I know that’s a saying or whatever, but I wouldn’t be surprised if his pants really just flew off. I mean there was the cute public display of affection where the couple held hands, but then there was the kind of public display of affection that really should be in private. It was like bloody watching soft porn happen in front of me over scrambled eggs… not ideal, let me tell you. For my stomach or my sanity.
I’ve tried hissing at her and glaring at her hoping she’d catch on, but apparently, snogging in that way renders your other senses completely useless.
Someone slumped into the seat beside me and made a gagging sound, “that is utterly the most terrifying and scarring thing I’ve ever seen.”
I looked over to see Peter’s face scrunch up in pure disgust. “Yeah, tell me about it. I think they just corrupted the mind of every first year in the entirety of Hogwarts.”
He shuddered, “I think they’ve corrupted me.”
“You would need corrupting,” I chuckled, ruffling his hair affectionately.
Peter rolled his eyes, but was smiling. “How are you, Didi? Erm, besides… losing your appetite.”
“Not bad,” I shrugged, knowing exactly what he was getting at, but refusing to talk about it. Yes, shoot me, I repress things…
Then a thought occurred to me. “Where are the Marauders, Petey?” I asked, arching an eyebrow inquisitively.
“Uhh…” he shifted in his seat. “Asleep, yeah! They’re asleep.”
I arched it even further, “Peter?”
“Oh, look! Post!” Peter cried out with far more enthusiasm than necessary at the owls now swooping into the Great Hall. I looked up as well. My eyes following a familiar gray owl till it stopped right above Peter. It dropped a small envelope, glared at him before flying off.
I hated that owl. It meant one thing.
Peter looked down at the envelope with a look of trepidation. He gingerly picked at it before finally tearing it apart to reveal a lengthy letter.
“Fuck,” he said after taking a few moments to read its content.
I knew. I didn’t even have to ask. It was his dad. His bloody good-for-nothing dad. I know that’s an awful thing to say about one of your best mate’s father, but Mr. Pettigrew was evil. If he loved his son in any way, he wouldn’t treat Peter this way. He wouldn’t treat his only son like scum and prevent his son from doing the things he loved. Peter couldn’t play Quidditch because his father disapproved of the sport, Peter couldn’t attend James Potter’s infamous Christmas parties because he didn’t like James, and he couldn’t be friends with me because he hated my family.
More importantly, he hated my dad.
I looked at Peter, wondering what the letter was about, but decided against asking him. I was about to reach over to comfort him when the Marauders came running into the Great Hall with the Slytherin seventh years trailing behind them.
I actually had to hand it to them this time. They really outdid themselves this year. Even I couldn’t stop laughing at the sight of the Slytherins. Each boy had a banner hovering above his head. Trailing Avery was one that said ‘I like to cuddle with Mulciber’ and above Mulciber was ‘I let Avery be the man.’ Both banners were flashing a bright pink colour and every five seconds the banner would change to say, ‘Avery hearts Mulciber’ or the other way around.
“Potter, when I get my hands on you, I’m going to-” Avery began to say, but James quickly cut him off, “I thought you had Mulciber for that, mate!”
A roar of laughter resounded throughout the Great Hall and I even saw Professor Sinistra stifle a giggle. The Marauders may irritate me half to death, but they were funny. Correction, they were bloody hilarious.
“Potter!” he roared, his eyes bulging out of its sockets.
The Marauders ran around the Gryffindor table and stood behind Peter and me while they grinned innocently at the Slytherins on the other side. There was a moment of silence as a giant balloon came out of nowhere and popped right above the Slytherins’ heads causing pink glitter to cascade down on them.
“What the!” Mulciber cried out as he tried to wipe the glitter off. Unfortuantely for them, it didn’t look like the glitter was going to come off anytime soon.
“You guys are dead! I swear to Merlin!” growled Viktor, another one of the very charming Slytherin boys. He had ‘I really want to be a girl’ hovering over his head.
“Save it for the Quidditch pitch, boys,” Lily said popping out of nowhere. She stood there, hands on her hips, while staring sternly at both group of boys. Lily’s stern look was actually quite frightening… I’d say McGonagall-level frightening, which was probably why the Slytherins slinked off back to their disease-infected dungeon or wherever they lived.
“Oh, my sweet Evans, you make me love you even more,” James smiled sweetly at her.
“Shut it, Potter,” Lily snapped.
Ensue Lily and James argument, James getting hexed, and Lily storming off…
Then a secret rendezvous where they release their sexual tension in hot passionate sex…
HA! Yeah, right!
We just all wish that would happen. I think the professors are even betting on it, although, maybe not the hot passionate sex bit… that might be a tad inappropriate.
“Okay, class! Today’s going to be a great lesson!” Professor Slughorn was an overly enthusiastic person. Too overly enthusiastic. He probably skipped in meadows in his free time and collected butterflies or some happy crap like that.
Did I mention I hated mornings?
And my friends.
Dorcas for her unbelievably explicit snog-fest, Lily for lecturing me on my unacceptable behaviour (should not have told her about punching Sirius), and Peter for ignoring me.
What was in that sodding letter? I had to know! Not because I’m a nosy cow, but because he was now ignoring me despite his whole ‘sod the secrecy bollocks’ talk. Something in that letter must have freaked him out.
“…and to make things a little more exciting this year, we’re going to be having assigned partners!” Professor Slughorn exclaimed, while the rest of the class groaned in response. Partners? Assigned? Crap, I just know this wasn’t going to go my way.
“Alrightey, kids,” he began as he read through the list of names from his parchment.
“Dorcas Meadows and Peter Pettigrew.” Poor Petey. "Remus Lupin and Mary MacDonald." Awe, that's cute! He better not even dare think impure thoughts about her though! “Lily Evans and Gary Cartwright.” James looked positively murderous. Well, at least Gary seemed happy that he could now ogle Lily all class to both James and Lily’s dismay. “James Potter and Andrena Pickles.” James audibly gagged. Andrena, bloody hell… that was cruel.
“Deora Grunnion and Sirius Black.”
I lied. This was cruel. NOOOOOOOOOO…
We both turned and stared at each other, a look of dread on mine and a cheeky one on his. Ugh...
“…Ah, I do believe that is everyone!” Professor Slughorn clapped his hands and then peered at another piece of parchment. “Right, today we will be attempting to make an elixir that induces Euphoria! I will write the ingredients on the board and the instructions can be found in your Advanced Potion-Making textbook, page 21.”
There was a ruffle of pages turning before everyone began to head to the cabinets in search of the ingredients. Deciding that Sirius was probably going to be a lazy git, I followed the crowd of students to gather the necessary ingredients.
A few minutes later, I returned back to my seat with a pile of ingredients and tools. I dropped it with a clang onto the tabletop and began to prepare the cauldron.
“Why won’t you look at me?” Sirius asked, a playful lilt to his tone. A tone I found I really did not like.
I ignored him and instead, tried to focus my attention on the task at hand… if only I wasn’t so shit at Potions. Okay, it couldn’t be that hard. So… a little bit of this, a touch of that… this wasn’t so bad…
“What the hell are you doing?” Sirius asked, peering over my shoulder. “You know the textbook states that it should be a sunshine yellow not a puke green?”
“Well if you’re so bloody smart, why don’t you do it!” I snapped. I whirled around to face the git not realising that he was right behind me. His body pressed up against me and I felt a wave of nausea at his proximity. Ew.
Sirius chuckled at my discomfort before putting both his hands on my waist and placing me aside. “Well, I would, but watching you mess up is far more amusing.”
Dickhead. Stupid, annoying dickhead!
Sirius looked up. “So can you tell me which ingredient the book says comes first?”
“How about the one that I won’t be shoving up your arse?” I growled at him. Go me!
Deora – 1. Sirius – 0.
Sirius sighed exasperatedly. “You’re ridiculous.”
“Am not,” I huffed.
Needless to say, the rest of that particular Potions lesson went along the lines of me being moody and snapping at Sirius while he laughed at me or threw random objects at my head. It’s not fun to have a ladle bounce of your cranium… it flipping hurt! I suppose I asked for it when I told him that he should stop trying to compensate for his lack of something-something down there. I chuckled to myself.
Deora – 2. Sirius – 0 (violence does not count as a win!)
So why do I hate Sirius so much, you ask? Well let me list it out for you beginning from first year.
1. He put gum in my hair on the very first day, which ended up with me having to cut a patch out of my long beautiful hair…
It’s not funny! I had wonky hair for ages!
2. He put me in the Hospital Wing!! Okay, it’s not as bad as it sounds. His broom just ended up whacking into mine when we were learning how to fly causing me to fall off of it mid-air and breaking my arm.
It wasn’t fun and I still hold a grudge.
3. He made Mary cry once. He said she was weird… She’s not! She’s just quiet and shy! I don’t care if he apologised, he’s still an arrogant twat.
4. He sexually harassed me… well, I mean… he pulled me into a broom closet and kissed me thinking I was someone else. Still, sexual harassment!
5. He picks on Peter way too much. I mean they all poke fun at each other, but sometimes, I just feel like he takes it too far with Peter. He doesn’t know how timid Peter’s personality is. He doesn’t know what Peter goes through at home so what right does he have to make fun of the way Peter is?
As I said, arrogant twat!
“Wow! This is very good, kids,” Professor Slughorn exclaimed excitedly.
I broke out of my inner rant to focus back on reality. Sirius was standing proudly by the cauldron, a sickeningly yellow liquid bubbling inside of it, while Professor Slughorn was grinning like a loon beside him.
“I am very impressed with you two!” he said to us. “You, Mister Black, are finally focusing your talent on academics rather than mischief, and you, Miss Grunnion, with Mister Black as a tutor, seem to be finally understanding this class!”
I inwardly groaned. I didn’t like where this was going.
“I do believe my idea of assigned partners is really having a positive effect on the class,” he said. “I think I might make this a permanent arrangement!”
A look of pure horror fell on Sirius’ face. Yeah, mate, you and I both.
Professor Slughorn nodded to himself and then continued on down the aisle, leaving Sirius and I to wallow in our self-pity.
Would it be cliché of me to say right now that this was going to be a long and miserable year? Yes? Well screw you, it is.
“Oi, Pettigrew, get your arse over here now!” I finally cried out.
Peter jumped from his spot on the red upholstered sofa and quickly rushed over towards me. I was standing in the nook of the common room that was half-covered by the scarlet and gold drapes. His face was flushed and he seemed a bit scared of me.
“You’re seriously deaf,” I told him.
“What do you want?” Peter said, rolling his eyes at me.
“Oh, well, I’m not trying to be nosy, Petey,” I mumbled. “But ever since that letter, you’ve been avoiding me. Was it from your dad?”
He wringed his hands and looked away. “Yeah, Didi. It was.”
I felt anger boil under my skin. What did that bastard want now? I patted his arm comfortingly. “And? It’s me, Peter.”
“Well, it’s just… I thought I’d ask him again about James’ Christmas bash this year,” Peter began to tell me. “I mean it’s our last year, who knows when we will all be together again, you know? I’ve never been to one and I always feel so left out! For once in my life, I just want to be apart of it.”
“And he shut you down, didn’t he?” I asked, but I already knew the answer. Of course, he did.
“Yeah, and he went on this tirade about me being disrespectful,” Peter told me. “Then he said he was looking out for me, he said James was a bad influence and that he was trying to keep me away from people that didn’t deserve to be my friend, that were unworthy of my friendship.”
I felt a stab of pain. “He meant me, didn’t he?”
“Oh no, Didi! Not just you, I mean…” Peter trailed off.
“Why does he hate me so much, Petey?” I asked. I’ve always wondered this. I’ve always wondered why our parents hated each other so much. Well, more specifically, our fathers.
“I don’t know,” Peter answered truthfully. “He said your dad was a careless Auror and a menace to the community, but he just doesn’t know your dad!”
“Well, he never will now, will he?” I cried out, fighting back the tears. “I bet he’s glad my dad went and got himself murdered, isn’t he?”
“Didi, you’re not being fair,” Peter said softly. “No one’s glad that happened! And my dad may feel that way, but I don’t.”
“I know, Peter, I know,” I said, my voice shaking as I calmed back down. I smiled at my secret best friend and gave him a hug.
“Ooh! Didn’t expect to find this,” cried a voice gleefully from behind me. I turned around to face three pair of curious eyes. The bloody Marauders. They really are the bane to my existence.
“Well, well, well,” Sirius grinned. “No wonder you don’t fall under my charms, Deora love, I’m not the right Marauder, am I?”
Make a note to apologise to Lily for my unacceptable behaviour.
heyyyyy lovely people! welcome back to another exciting chapter of KtS! well, i hope you liked this one too. i personally found it more interesting than the last one, which to me was more like a filler so i could introduce you to the characters. sooo what do you think of sirius? he's such a cheeky little git! and i'm sorry that there are no sexual tension between the two yet, but hey, deora's spent her whole hogwarts life dislking the guy... it'll take awhile (maybe not that long) for her to start being attracted to him. plus, sirius now thinks she's in love with his best friend! okay enough rambling, what do you think of mr. pettigrew? EVIL, isn't he? favourite lines? opinions? drop a line! and more dorcas and deora next chapter, i think... as well as a surprise gift from someone ;-) get excited!
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