I Should Tell You I’m Disaster
I Forget How To Begin It
My palms were sweating. You couldn’t see it even if you tried; a thick pair of woollen gloves sheathed my hands, covering my secretly sticky skin. It wasn’t the heat, it was the fear.
Fear. It sounded too tame: I was all-out terrified.
In those same clammy hands, I was holding a letter. This letter wasn’t long, detailed, or particularly incredible. No, it was a normal letter. I was fully intending to just stop off, give it to his mother or someone who was there, and leave again.
But no. He was, for some inexplicable reason, in his own house.
I should tell you
“Al!” he cheered, “Bloody hell, I’ve been so bored. Come in!”
“Hi, Scorpius,” I managed weakly, realising my dreams of handing my carefully written, entirely uncomfortable letter to someone and then running far away were ruined.
This meant one thing: I’d have to gird my loins and tell him myself. A huge part of me made for the door as soon as I’d had that thought, leaving the slightly braver part of me to have a nervous fit.
Stepping into the Malfoy mansion, I pulled off my coat and chucked it at the floor. I noticed the entire place was a tip: a pair of Scorpius’ boxer’s were hanging from the grand staircase rail. I raised an eyebrow as he grinned.
“Nice, isn’t it?” he said airily, “The parents went to Italia for a whole month, so I thought I’d have a party! But after the party, I realised the butler went with them. And the house elves are having their annual holiday. It’s a nightmare, I tell you!”
I grinned. Scorpius’ parties were infamous, generally because they left wherever they had been in a state of horror unmatched.
I should tell you
“Drink?” Scorpius offered.
“Yeah, please,” I consented, “And make it strong. You would not believe the night I’ve had.”
Indeed, convincing my mother that I was gay and it wasn’t just another prank I was playing was one of the most tasking things I’d done in my life. Convincing my dad, however, was a breeze. Dad wasn’t known for being particularly confrontational.
“Oh?” Scorpius raised an eyebrow, leading me down into the kitchens, “Do tell.”
I shook my head. “Long story short: my mum is very hard to persuade.”
“You’re kidding me,” he replied sarcastically, “Ginny Weasley, hard to persuade? Never.”
I should tell you
Using a handy set of shortcuts, we made it to the kitchens in record time. The door was hanging off the hinges, and the floor was covered in what looked like the remnants of an impressive food fight.
“Gross,” I commented, stepping around something steadily growing fur. “Scorpius, you need to get a cleaner. Or clean this place up on your own.”
“Nah, it’s all good,” he said, waving his hand in dismissal, “So what do you want?” He dived into a cupboard. I heard clinking.
“Actually, I only came here to talk,” I explained. Scorpius emerged holding no fewer than three tall bottles of mead.
“Talk?” he questioned, “No problem. I’m good at talking. What’d wanna say?”
“I... Can I have a drink, first?” Albus Potter, you wuss.
I Should Tell I Blew The Candle Out
Just To Get Back In
Handing me one of the bottles, Scorpius conjured up two large armchairs.
“Come to think of it,” he said, uncorking one of the two bottles he was holding, “I have something I need to tell you too. Ladies first!”
I rolled my eyes. “Don’t be a twat, Scorpius. We both know you’re more of a girl here.”
“Alright then,” Scorpius took a swig of alcohol. I copied his action; the mead was amazing and I took another gulp. “I’ll go first. Since the ‘rents left, and I had that massive blow out party, I’ve been doing some thinking. You know how I’ve never been good with women?” I nodded miserably. We must have been the least fancied guys in Hogwarts: we lacked any sort of charm at all, according to Rose. The only people who ever took any interest only wanted our surnames. “Well, that hasn’t got any better since we left Hoggy Warty Hogwarts. So I’m not looking at women anymore: I’ve decided I’m going to come out of the closet.”
I'd Forgotten How to Smile
Until Your Candle Burned My Skin
My mouth fell open. Usually, I trounced him with something, but this literally had me gobsmacked.
“You’re okay with that, right?” he asked, looking worried.
“You barstard, I was going to say that!” I exclaimed, “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
“I was worried about your reaction!” No sooner than I’ve said this, Scorpius bursted out into laughter. It was contagious, and soon we were laughing our heads off.
Maybe the mead was spiked with something.
As the laughter died off, left with broad grins and a sense of belonging, I took another swig of mead.
“Fuck it,” Scorpius muttered, “I might as well.”
He grabbed the front of my shirt and pulled me towards him. There was a brief moment where he paused and all I could concentrate on is his breath on my lips, and then his lips were on mine and it was as if it was meant to be.
Guess So
It's Starting To
Who Knows?
I pulled him from his chair and into my arms. It was as if he should have been there all along; damned me and my insecurities for waiting so damn long for this. I should have kissed him every moment I got. I should have told him I loved him from day one.
He twisted suddenly, turning as if in a dance, and with a crack we’re falling onto his bed. There was the sound of my heartbeat and heavy breathing in my ears; his lips were everywhere and it was so wrong it could only be right right right.
Trusting Desire - Starting To Learn
Walking Through Fire Without A Burn
Afterwards, I realised I promised that I’d return home and break the news to my grandparents tonight.
“Sod it,” Scorpius said, pinning me down on his bed once more, “It can wait. Besides, you will go home. Just not quite yet.”
I was never very good at kissing girls – another point on the endless list of things I wasn’t talented at – but when Scorpius pressed his lips to mine, I smiled under them and rolled us over. There’s a knack to anything, and when it came to kissing it was obvious to me then it’s all about what you’re feeling for the other person.
Clinging - A Shoulder, A Leap Begins
Stinging And Older, Asleep On Pins
“Do you know what you are?” I asked him, posing teasing kisses on his jaw line so he squirmed, “You’re what I’ve been waiting for.”
“Damn right I am,” he said breathlessly, “So you better be as good as the hype I built around you.”
Who Knows Where - Who Goes There
Here Goes - Here Goes
There’s nothing like waking up the next morning to find sunshine and a god lying next to you. Remembering your mother is probably going to kill you for shirking your duties is a small worry besides the glow of finding a lover, and it’s nothing compared to knowing he’s also your best friend.
Here Goes
Here Goes
Here Goes...
The song is by The Rent. More stirctly speaking, Jonathon Larson.
I own nothing, and I love love love this pairing =)
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