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Ivy in Wonderland by emerald_princess
Chapter 1 : The Great Hogwarts High Heel Race
Rating: 15+Chapter Reviews: 3

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Absolutely Fabulous chapter image by love-jillmarie @ TDA


I took a deep breath as I said each number and closed my eyes.  Calm, calm.  Ok I’m calm, I’m good.

I opened my eyes and their he was smirking down at me like he was the biggest thing on the planet.  Before I could stop myself I lunged at him, tackling him to the ground, so maybe I wasn’t calm after all.  I sure was strong though punching him over and over again in the chest so hard my knuckles began to hurt.  I could feel his body shaking under me, wow I must have been hitting him really hard, he was sobbing.  I looked at him the smile that had been forming on my face slipped away immediately though.


“THIS ISN’T FUNNY!” I screamed.

Potter just laughed harder, letting out a rather unattractive snort.

“I hate you.”  I began to punch again, realizing this time just how feeble the attempt at hurting him was, but I kept going anyway.

“You’re a jerk. I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!”  I punched him harder with each word I spoke; he continued to laugh, like the idiot he was.

“Merlin, Ivy,” he said through his laughter, “You’ve gone completely bonkers, I guess we can add that to the LONG list of reasons why no guy on this earth would ever like you!”

He laughed again and I went to choke him.  My oh so sensible and loving best friend saw I was going a bit too far so she wrenched my hands from his neck.

“Ivy!” she yelled hitting me over the head, “you’ve gone insane. Leave him alone, now.”

I tried to stare her down but Michelle Higgins is very good at stare downs.

“Fine.” I reluctantly mumbled picking myself off of the top of Potter and letting her lead me back to our compartment.


I sighed; I hadn’t even made it an hour before I went all sadistic and crazy, this year I had been aiming for at least a day.  It wasn’t my fault though.  It was Potters, It was always Potters.  If he wasn’t such an arrogant jerk then I wouldn’t be that way.  He had seen me making my way back to my compartment, after getting changed into my school uniform and had decided to stand in front of me and block my path.  He just stood their grinning at me and I had an urge to rip all of his stupid, perfect teeth out.  He knew perfectly well how impatient I was but still he stood in front of me while I was trying to get to my compartment.  I had made a move to get around him and he had blocked my path.

“Out of my way Potter.” I said and nudged him out of my way.  As I began to walk away he called for me to wait, his voice was so desperate and apologetic that I couldn’t help but stop, Potter was never desperate or apologetic, especially not around me.  I turned around and looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to talk.  He just stood there.  Stupid twit!  I waited and waited and he didn’t speak a word just gave me this cocky smirk that I detest and stood staring at me.

“What?” I finally said, trying very hard to keep my voice down.  He acted like he didn’t hear me and continued to smirk.  What an idiot, I mean who seriously does that?  How in the hell can that possibly work to annoy people, it can’t.  Well I guess it did actually work because that was around the time when I counted and lunged. 


I must hand it to Michelle though she is an incredibly wonderful and patient best friend and her hair is cut very stylishly.  She always manages to calm me down and she doesn’t care that I hate James Potter more then anyone in the world.  She accepts me for who I am.  I must say though looking at us you would find it hard to believe that I’m the crazy one.  Michelle is very unique, she has a unique sense of style and she gets very obsessed with things, at the moment she is obsessed with hippies, music that was ‘hip’ when my grandparents were my age and high-heeled shoes.  She is wearing a pair of bright hot pink ones now.  She is lightly tanned and freckly with big brown eyes and caramel coloured hair, she also has a super sweet smile that matches her super sweet personality.  She is wearing her high-heels with her school uniform; she has shortened the skirt and added pink glitter to it.  She is obsessed with the colour pink as well; she has even said she would like to change the house colour to pink, which did not go down well with the other Ravenclaw students.  She was keeping a determined silence but I could tell she was trying not to laugh.  She wouldn’t even meet my eyes because she knew she’d burst out laughing.  The compartment was completely silent and Michelle was content with staring out of the window watching the world glide by, I, however, am more easily bored.

“I like your shoes.” I lied trying to get her to talk to me. She didn’t react.

“They’re really nice,” I continued, “They’re so bright and sparkly!”

“I know you don’t like them,” she finally answered, “you hate pink and you hate sparkles.”

I laughed at her as if to say that she was being absurd when really she wasn’t, I think pink is blech.  I began to talk to her about what she thinks will happen this year so the whole train ride whizzed by as we chatted freely and happily to each other. 


After the sorting ended the whole of the student body tucked into the feast.  It really was delicious; the Hogwarts house elfs really were the best.  I ate hungrily and when I was so full I thought I would burst I looked around the hall, finally getting my chance to look at the changes in people.  There was Gregory Meharg who was a year younger then me, he looked pretty much the exact same as he had last year, his prefect badge gleamed brightly on his chest and he smiled arrogantly at anyone whose eyes flickered to it as if he thought they were jealous.  As if, nobody wanted to be as stupid as him.  He was such a pompous brat.  Last year he had given me a detention for pretend slapping Michelle!  He caught me staring at him and grinning broadly winked.  I made the sign for gagging and then stuck the finger up at him.  My eyes roamed the hall searching for someone else and then they locked with my ex-boyfriends.  He smiled at me flirtatiously and continued to stare, and then he mouthed the words ‘I love you’ and turned his attention back to his friend.  Delilah Chantal was sitting next to him.  She also looked the same as always-gross.  Her hair had become an even faker shade of blonde over the summer and her lips were coated in gloss, she was heavily make-upped and she batted her lashes like an insane person with a ridiculous twitch.  How she even got into Ravenclaw was beyond me.  Her personality-or lack there of was almost as ridiculous as her face.  I turned to look over at the Gryffindor table and smiled to see Liam Mitchell with one more tattoo then last year, making faces at her and sticking the finger up at her turned back.  They had been dating for a while but he realized that she was evil and decided to dump her.  I laughed when he did and then she tried to slap me but I bent all of her fingers back and then Greg Meharg gave me another detention.


I was broken out of my reverie by a very loud racket.  Professor McGonagall or Minnie as I so lovingly named her must have given her annual speech while I was dreaming off; everyone had gotten up and were making their way to the common rooms.  Michelle and I linked arms and began to skip through the crowd of people.  We had almost reached the doors when she stumbled and had to grab onto a first year for support.  I began to laugh.

“Shut up.” Michelle grumbled pushing me playfully.

“You can’t even walk in those stupid shoes; I bet you ten galleons that I could run in them!”

“Oh yeah,” she said raising an eyebrow challengingly, “Lets have a race then.”

I racked my brains for an excuse not to race and then looking at the dirty old converse on my feet I found one.

“Sorry, can’t,” I answered, “I don’t have heels.”

Michelle was to good for me though and grabbed out a spare pair of the exact same coloured shoes from her bag and handed them to me.

“You keep a spare?” I asked.

“Of course I do.  If one of my heels break I need another pair.” She explained.

Michelle cleared an area around us and I slipped off my shoes and put on the other ones.  They were horrible!  I could barely stand in them let alone run.  Michelle and I lined up and prepared to run, or in my case stumble around for a bit and then fall over like a right twit.  A random in the audience that had gathered around us yelled out “First one to the Ravenclaw common room gets 10 galleons from the loser!  Ready, Set, go!”

Michelle and I began to run as fast as we possibly could- which wasn’t very fast- with the shoes on and as I began to gather speed I tripped fell straight on top of a certain someone who I happen to hate more then anyone else in the world.  Michelle didn’t even stop to see if I was ok she was determined to get 10 galleons, it was to bad that I didn’t actually have 10 galleons.  Potter pushed me off of him in a very un gentlemanly like manner, making me fall flat on my arse he then grinned at me and walked off with his friends laughing. If it had been possible for me to run in my shoes I would have chased him around the school but I couldn’t even get up.


I was sitting in the middle of the hallways for god knows how long when someone came up and helped me to my feet.  I knew that it was a guy immediately because I could feel the strength in his arms as he hoisted me up.  I turned to thank him.  Seeing who he was I stepped back.  He bent down slightly and puckered up.  I cringed away.

“Derek, we are not dating anymore, I broke up with you!” I exclaimed, backing away.

“Awww, come on babe, it was just a little fight.  You know you want me.”

“No I don’t leave me alone!” I answered.  Ignoring me he put his arms around my waist and tried to pull me closer to him.  I kneed him in the place where no one wants to be kneed and as he doubled over in pain I walked off.  Luckily for me he didn’t follow, unluckily for me Greg was behind me.

“Miss Hardwick,” he said in his annoying, whiny voice, “I am afraid that I am going to have to give you a detention for kneeing Mr. Boride in his privates!”  I heard a few snickers behind me and couldn’t help but grin.  I was actually very proud of myself I had almost lasted the whole first night without getting a detention and at least it was only one.  As I began to walk away Greg stopped me.  He looked pointedly down at my feet and said in a remarkably more annoying voice “I’ll have to give you another detention for those shoes, they are not appropriate.”  I gasped as I looked down at the pair of shoes on my feet, Michelle’s shoes. 

“WHAT?!” I yelled angrily “That is so unfair!”

“And another one.  For yelling at a prefect like that!” He grinned and stalked off.

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