Chapter 2 : Jargon and Marshmallows
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“Lily you have lost your mind.” Hailey whispered to her friend with a violent shake of her head.
“I'd like to register my agreement with Hailey on that statement, but I'd also like it noted that I want to do this.” Sarah announced with a grin as she painted her nails.
“What's with this courtroom jargon kick you've been on?” Cynthia asked from her place on the floor.
“It makes the conversation more interesting.”
“Yes, but Hailey can't understand a word you say.” Lily teased, staring out the window.
“Yes I can! She thinks I'm nuts and she agrees with you...I mean-”
“The plaintiff clearly understood herself. I ask that you cease your line of questioning.” Sarah interrupted with a giggle.
“Objection denied!” Hailey announced seriously. “We are not going to do this!”
“Why not?” Cynthia asked skeptically. Lily rolled her eyes at her friend when she started to do sit-ups. Cynthia was such a tomboy.
“Because it's an impossible task! We can't keep Peter and Remus from getting detentions.” Hailey buried her face in her pillow.
Sighing and deciding to rotate the colors on her nails from pink, to green, to orange Sarah told them, “I have a thought to register; It can work if we dedicate ourselves to it. But it would be a twenty-four-hour job. Lily and Cynthia have the easy part.”
“I've been thinking about that all day, actually.” Hailey replied.
Hailey Warren took the world literally. This made her seem like an idiot, but often it made her an invaluable friend.
“What if the Marauders wrote us the letters?” Her voice was hesitant as she looked at Lily. “I mean, James would get a chance with you. Sirius would get his random date and Remus and Peter would have us trying to stop them from getting detentions. It seems a little bit too lopsided.”
“I know all of their handwriting. It wasn't them.” Cynthia said confidently.
“They can change their handwriting.” Hailey said flatly.
“Yes...but I think there's more to it.” Lily announced.
“Such as?” Sarah asked in her lawyer voice.
“At the same time that we got our owls the marauders got some too. And...it just seems to easy. I don't think that Potter would do that.”
Lily's friends stared at her in disbelief.
“I'm just saying!” She defended grumpily.
“All this talk will get us nowhere. All in favor of trying please raise your foot.”
“Foot, Sarah?” Cynthia asked tiredly, flipping onto her back and forgoing exercise for the night.
“Everybody raises their hand.” She mumbled back.
“Fine. Everybody in favour please raise your foot.” Lily said officially.
Cynthia immediately tossed her foot in the air and then let it fall with a dull thud and Lily joined her from her place by the window.
After a moment of though Sarah screwed the cap on her nail polish and raised her newly painted toenails into the air.
They all looked at Hailey.
She just closed her eyes. “I'd like my reluctance registered.”
“Duly noted.” Sarah told her with a conspiratorial smile.
Hailey rose her foot into the air, sealing their doom.
* * *
“Well it's obviously a challenge.” James announced, lounging comfortably in his chair.
“Wormtail, go get Moony out of that book so that we can discuss this like civilized beings.” Sirius drawled from his place on the floor by the fire.
“I'm listening.” Remus announced absently.
“Right. We should do it.” James informed them, completely confident that his friends would agree.
Thunder rolled outside and Sirius turned and stared out the window, “And if it's a trick?”
“Then we get them back.” Remus replied easily.
“But we could end up looking like idiots.” Peter grumbled, speaking for the first time as he shifted in his chair.
“We always look like idiots. It's our charm.” Remus rationalized.
“But..to swear off girls? For a year? For my seventh year? Really?” Sirius whined.
“Padfoot has a point.” James added, looking worried. “It's seventh year. And my last year to get together with Lily- Wait! What if she did this? She wants me to swear off girls so that I'll stop bothering her. Clever...”
“That wasn't Lily's handwriting.” Peter pointed out.
“Handwriting is easily faked, Wormtail. I sign your name better than you do.” Sirius argued, pulling a marshmallow out of nowhere and skewering it on a fire poker with a satisfied grin.
Remus, James and Peter exchanged glances, but decided not to ask where said treat came from.
“Well...I think we should at least try. It's a challenge.” James repeated seriously, holding his hand out to Sirius who gave him another marshmallow and another fire poker without a word.
“Do you know where those have been?” Remus asked, sounded rather like an overtired babysitter.
“Nick'd 'em form da kidgens” Sirius replied happily with three marshmallows in his mouth.
“Right...” Peter said, “But about the breaking every rule in the handbook bit...How is that going to work?”
“That's the easy job.” Sirius promised after he had swallowed. “Honestly it'll just be a summary of everything we've already done.”
“It all seems...too easy.” Peter replied and Remus nodded.
“Well then, that means that we'll win! All in favor?” James asked, popping a marshmallow into his mouth.
Sirius put his hand into the air with a second thought, but there was a pained look on his face as he thought of what he was giving up. Girls.
James followed with a grimace, “She'll find it endearing.” he whispered hopefully.
Hiding a snort at James's comment, Remus followed suit.
They all looked at Peter. “I still think it's a trick.” he announced as he put his hand in the air.
“Wonderful. It's good to see that the peer pressure is still working, eh?” James commented, standing and stretching.
Sirius stared at him for a moment before shaking his head. “I need to wallow about the 'no girls' part of this deal for a while. I'll see you all later.”
With that he stood and left the common room.
“One of these days he's going to get caught.” Remus grumbled, knowing that it wasn't true.
“No he won't. Rememeber last year? He had an entire discussion with Binns and helped him up the stairs at three in the morning. And before that Slughorn gave him ten points because he was...picking up litter at midnight. He'll never get caught.” James said admiringly.
“He'll get caught eventually.” A female voice said knowingly, making them all jump.
“Hello Cynthia.” Remus said warily, wondering how much she had heard.
She smiled, “Hey guys. I just need to go for a walk. Funny thing, the girls were just having the same conversation about me when I left.”
And with that she followed in Sirius's footsteps.
“She's him.” Peter accused with a laugh.
“Well maybe they'll get together. Sirius seems the type to fall for himself.” Remus said in a stage whispered.
“You know what'd be funny?” Peter asked with a grin.
“It would be mean.” Remus said, catching on.
“What?” James asked.
“We should try to throw those two together a lot.” Remus explained.
“You know he actually kind of likes her.” James confided.
“That's what makes it funny, Prongs.” Peter replied easily.
With many a cackle, they went to bed.
* * * *
Sirius Black roamed the halls of Hogwarts, trying to straighten his thoughts out.
Regulus was one of them now. He just knew it. And now he had another problem.
His outlet was gone.
No girls. None. He couldn't flirt with them or touch them or even think about them too hard.
He was only vaguely aware of his location when he heard muttering around the corner on his right.
Usually that kind of thing was his cue to run, but he had a feeling that all was well, so he kept walking until he rounded the corner to find tall girl with shoulder-length black hair staring at the entrance to the Ravenclaws common room.
“Problems?” He asked conversationally.
She turned and he realized that it was Cynthia Carlisle.
Cynthia smiled, wondering at the odds and shook her head, “Nope. The answer is 27, but I don't know what to do once I get in.”
“Couldn't sleep?” He asked in amusement as she looked around for inspiration.
“I have a long year ahead of me.” Cynthia answered cryptically
“Join the club.” Sirius responded with a chuckle, looking at the entrance, “So may I ask why our logical friends are the target for tonight?”
Cynthia shrugged, “They're just so dang smarmy and smug and...smart. They...they have it coming, okay?”
Snorting, Sirius shook his head. “Okay...so what are you thinking of?”
She smiled serenely. “Water. Lots of water. And ice.”
It was an odd moment for Sirius Black. He couldn't flirt with this girl. He couldn't ask her on a date and dump her the next day.
Somehow, it was endearing.
“Well. I think I can help.” He told her with a smirk.
The rest is best left unrecorded.