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Harebrained and Downright Dangerous by Excalaber
Chapter 1 : I believe I can fly!
Rating: 12+Chapter Reviews: 10

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“Padfoot! What are you doing?” shouted James running up the stairs of the astronomy tower, “Don’t do it! Don’t jump!”

“What are you going on about prongs? I’m not gonna jump. I’m gonna fly.” 

“You can’t fly Padfoot; shout to moony down there, I bet he can tell you load’s of reasons why you can’t fly. Even Wormtail might be able to give you a few. Wait don’t talk to Wormtail he’ll believe you can.” 

“But I can fly!” insisted Sirius, “I’ve worked it all out. And it should work... technically!” 

“Worked it out… What? How long have you been planning to kill yourself Padfoot?” 

“I’m not killing myself!” yelled Sirius, “I’m attempting to fly! You can join me if you want to?” he added hopefully 

“You can’t fly Sirius!” yelled James flinging his arms in the air. 

“I can fly!” 

“No one can—” 

“I think I can, so there,” Interrupted Sirius, “all I need is the right magic. I even went to the library and looked it up.” 

“By Merlin’s saggy left… there is no magic that can let you fly Padfoot.” 

“There is!” Sirius muttered, moodily flinging his arms in the air and peering over the edge of the parapet, “Oi prongs how many people ya think are down there now?” 

James walked to the edge of the parapet and gazed over the edge at what seemed to be the whole school gathered there. 

“I dunno maybe about five maybe six hundred,” James replied, “you’ve gathered quite a crowd.” 

“Oi Moony,” Sirius screamed spotting Remus the crowd, “get your flea bitten arse up here! And bring Wormy I got something to tell you guys.” 

“What are you up to Sirius?” asked James. “And why do you want Moony and Wormtail up here?” 

“I wanna fly.” Screeched Sirius stamping his foot, “And I need to see if you, Moony or Wormtail wanna fly too,” his face breaking into a large toothy grin. 

Remus clambered up the last steps his face wet with perspiration, “you know there are a lot of steps in there?” he said pointing to the staircase.” Peter came crawling up the stairs behind him his face covered with sweat. 

“Welcome to the Padfoot flight training school.” Sirius said in a booming and scarily a very serious voice, “you three have been selected, for your extreme bravado and total disregard for all rules, to join my pioneering program.” 

“Has he finally popped a cork?” Remus whispered to James, Peter just blinked at Sirius. 

“No I have not!” Shouted Sirius jumping down from the parapet and walking towards the other two, “My incredibly clever and daring plan will be talked about for years to come. Join me my friends and make Hogwarts history. The first part of my plan is this.” 

Sirius huddled in closer to the other boys, his face alight with his best salesman grin… 

“And that’s all there is too it?” asked James his face still not sure at what he had just heard. 

Sirius nodded vigorously. 

“It could work.” Remus concluded eventually, instantly all three boys roared into fits of laughter. 

“So you in?” Sirius asked his face deadly serious. 

“Is it safe?” asked peter, “I mean not much we do is safe but… you know what I mean.” 

“Well…” replied Sirius shrugging, “I guess it’s about as safe as jumping off a really tall tower could be. So you guys in or what?” 

“I’ll do it if they will.” Said Peter, pointing to James and Remus, who were both looking over the edge, with large smiles on their faces. 

“Yea we’re in!” roared prongs and moony together. 

“So it’s just that one charm and then we jump?” asked Remus. 

“Yeah and its first year magic, so even wormy should get it.” Sirius said grinning at Peter. 

“Hey I’m not that bad, I might not be able to get some of the spells you guys can do but—” 

“Enough guy’s… I think I see Minnie down there.” Said James squinting over the edge of the tower, “and she doesn’t look too happy.” 

Sirius giggled when he looked over the edge and saw Professor McGonagall looking back up at him and waving her arms in the air. 


“Ok Minnie,” shouted Sirius down to her, “We’ll be down in a minute. Err would you mind standing a bit back from the base of the tower though.” 

“Alright we’re up.” Said James, “Everyone, take your positions.” 

The four marauders clambered up onto the parapet. 

“Wands out!” Ordered Sirius. 

The four marauders drew their wands and held them at the ready to cast the spell. 

“Three, two, one and then cast!” Sirius ordered again. “Three… two… one” 

As one the four boys tapped themselves on the head and muttered the spell. 

“Right now… JUMP!” roared Sirius as he leaped off the edge. 

Remus jumped a fraction of a second after Sirius and James just slightly after, Peter tripped and went hurtling past them all like a bullet, his robes flapping in the wind. All four connected to the ground with a large BOING, their bodies compressing into pancakes and instantly re-forming as they sprung back upwards again. All to the joy of the many spectators who were watching white faced as the boys hurled themselves from the tower and expecting a bone crunching bang. Sirius, James and Remus played to the crowd by twirling and flipping through the air on their many bounces, Peter just screamed loudly and barreled his arms through the air, all to the sharp stare of Professor McGonagall who stood as still as a statue, her face pouring with anger. 

Slowly the bouncing charm wore off and the boys bounced less and less with each bounce, eventually it wore off completely and peter landed flat on his back emitting a loud OOMPFF as all the air rushed from his lungs, leaving him gasping for air. Sirius finished off his bouncing by somersaulting to earth, his arms outstretched and finishing in a deep bow, James and Remus managed to land somewhat less professionally than Sirius but also ended their performance with a bow. All to the loud cheers of the crowd. 

“I Flew… I can FLY! I don’t believe it I CAN FLY!” yelled Sirius laughing hysterically and jumping up and down flapping his arms. 

“Where did you learn to land like that?” asked James whacking Sirius on the back. Before Sirius could reply James was enveloped by a flying mass of flaming red hair, knocking Sirius to the side. 

“James… don’t ever do that again… Don’t ever!” Sobbed Lilly, nuzzling her tear streaked face into his shoulder, “Promise me you won’t!” 

“Lilly!” said James looking startled at the girl of his dreams suddenly weeping in his arms. 

“Promise me now!” sobbed Lilly louder. 

“I promise.” Said James softly, wrapping his arms around the sobbing Lilly. “I’ll never do that again.” 

“That is a promise you will be keeping potter, all of you could have been killed; Mr Pettigrew looks half dead anyway.” She yelled flicking her hand in Peter’s direction, where Remus was helping him slowly to his feet. “And from my own house no less,” She snapped, ”I can’t believe it—you should all be expelled immediately and you Mr Lupin a prefect no less, you’ve out done yourselves this—” 

“Excuse me Minerva,” Dumbledore said, putting a hand on her shaking shoulder, “I think I will deal with this matter.” 

“Oh… I was about to bring them to your office immediately headmaster. But if you wish.” McGonagall said flicking her arm in the marauders direction still shaking with anger, and staring at the marauders, shuffling their feet and the sobbing Lilly. 

“Bravo!” Clapped Dumbledore, turning toward the marauders, “An interesting use of the bouncing charm Mr Black, however I sincerely hope there will be no encore.” all four boys grinned and then nodded somberly. “With your assurances that you will never do it again,” he looked at each marauder in turn, “you will not be expelled!”
“Headmaster.” Said professor McGonagall sharply, “Surly for a stunt—” 

“Don’t worry Minerva.” He said smiling at the fuming teacher. “You will each however receive a week of detention to be served in whichever way professor McGonagall sees fit and I’m sure they will be very fitting,” at a quick glance from McGonagall he added, “Alas you must also each lose fifty points from your house. If this is not enough to impress on you the seriousness of your deeds, I will also be banning the astronomy tower to all student’s while not under the supervision of a teacher.” 

“But it was cool wasn’t it sir?” asked Sirius beaming. 

“Yes Mr Black, it was as you say, ‘cool’.” Smiled Dumbledore, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.


A/N Please, Please review! I hope you enjoyed my little sideline on why the astronomy tower is off limits, I’ve always wondered about flying and Sirius just seemed to be the best person to pick it up and leap with it so to speak. Please note: all the marvelous characters belong to the master JK Rowling and do not in anyway belong to me.

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