Chapter 10 : Months of Lies
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I don't like Januarys. Dad was born in January, but I still don't like them. Dad's birthday (January 9) was two days ago. Mum and Dad used their Christmas gift to go to Merlin's Eatery for dinner. Mum was convinced that she looked really bad in her cute, dark green dress. Dad, Harry, and I convinced her that she looked really nice and that she should wear it.
Mum and Dad started talking about possible baby names. Dad suggested William. Mum and Dad agreed on that name. Then, Mum suggested William Severus, after Dad. He was totally against that, saying, "I don't want a child named after me." Mum told him she liked his name. He finally agreed. So, the baby's name is William Severus James Snape.
The James part was added in to honor Mum's first husband. I suggested adding it in. They agreed, after Mum said that it would change the last two names from Severus Snape to Severus James Snape. Dad grudgingly agreed.
I was waiting for Dad to pick me up after school on Monday, when some girls in my class who didn't like me came up to me. They stopped in front of me. I just looked at the ground, hoping they'd go away.
"Hey, Snape," Alicia, the "leader", sneered. I stayed silent.
"Don't you have anything to say, Snape?" another girl, Tracy, said. She shoved me.
"No, I don't," I said. I was trying really hard to not let my temper get the better of me. I had inherited Dad's bad temper, and he was constantly reminding me to not let what people say get on my nerves.
"So," Alicia said, "I can't believe you're dating Sam. He's mine."
"No," I said, softly, still struggling to control my anger, "he's not. He asked me to be his girlfriend. He's never been interested in you."
I stayed silent, wondering what they were getting at. I tried to ignore them, but it was hard. Alicia suddenly got in my face.
"I can't believe he'd go out with a fat pig like you!" she said cruelly. "I mean, you eat so much for lunch. I can't believe he can even like you! Just notice how fat you are."
I stared at her in shock. Surely she didn't mean it. I wasn't fat. . . was I?
Dad came driving up a few minutes later. I got into the passenger seat. I tried to hold back the tears, but they escaped anyway. Dad, thankfully, didn't comment.
Later that night, at dinner, I just stared at my food. When I looked up once, everyone was staring at me. I looked back down at my plate, and pushed my food around.
"Emma," Dad finally said. "Are you going to eat, or are you just going to push your food around?"
"I'm not hungry," That was a lie of course. I was really hungry, but I didn't want to gain more weight and make Sam break up with me.
"Eat a little," Mum said. "Then you can go upstairs."
I pretended to take a bite. Then, I put my napkin up to my lips, pretending to wipe my lips, and spit the food out. No one noticed. I breathed a sigh of relief quietly. I did the same thing about four times again.
The next day, I sat down at lunch next to Sam. I'd been up late last night, studying for a Herbology test that we were going to have. I put my head on his shoulder.
"Hey, babe," he said.
"Hey," I replied tiredly. I noticed Alicia glaring at me from across the hall. She smirked at me, then turned around and started talking to her friends.
"So, no lunch today?" Katie asked me as she sat down.
"Yeah, I'm not hungry. I had a big breakfast," I lied. I hadn't had a big breakfast. I only had a banana, because Mum forced me to. She told me that I had to have at least something in my stomach before I could leave.
"I miss Harry," Katie said. She sighed and stared at her lunch.
"Me, too," I said. I folded my arms on the table and put my head on my arms. I felt Sam start to rub my back. I sighed.
My stomach was hurting. I was tempted to go get something, but Alicia's words from yesterday stopped me in my tracks. I wouldn't want to be a fat pig, like she said.
That night, I didn't eat anything at all. I told them that I had had a big lunch and I wasn't hungry. I saw Dad give Mum a worried look. She shrugged and said that I could go upstairs and start my homework.
I finished my homework at about eight. I had started around six, and I only had Transfiguration and a Potions essay. They were both pretty easy.
I took a shower, put on my pajamas, and laid down on my bed. I started thinking about Alicia's words. Surely I wasn't fat? I mean, I only weighed about 95 pounds. I didn't look fat, did I? I sighed and fell asleep a few minutes later.
The next day, at school, I did the same thing. I said that I had had a big breakfast and I wasn't hungry. Mason joined us at the table. They all gave me a curious look, but didn't comment. I was grateful, I didn't want to explain why I wasn't eating.
The next month was full of lies. I lied to everyone. Whenever someone would ask me if I'd eaten, I'd say I had. If I didn't want to lie, I'd fake that I'd eaten.
Some nights, I could get away with going upstairs to do my homework while I ate. I'd take my food upstairs, then vanish it. I made sure that the plate wasn't completely clean and it looked liked I'd eaten.
Sam kept giving me worried looks. I smiled and told him that I was fine. I said that Mum kept giving me a really good breakfast and I couldn't refuse her because she was pregnant and she would start to cry if I didn't. He accepted the lie, but I could tell that he was still worried. I saw him talking to Mason one day, and they kept shooting me worried glances.
I noticed that I'd lost a lot of weight. I stepped on the scales that were in the bathroom. It told me that I only weighed 78 pounds. I'd lost only twenty pounds in the last month and a few days. It wasn't good enough.
Yesterday, Alicia stopped me in a deserted hallway and told me that I was still fat and needed to lose a few more pounds. I believed her. I couldn't believe, after all the weight I had lost, I was still fat. I fled to the bathroom and broke down and cried.
Another month passed and it was finally March. Mum was due to have the baby in two months. I started feeling sick. I'd get really bad stomachaches and headaches. I kept the pain to myself. If Dad found out, he probably be angry.
I was in Herbology when it happened. We were re-potting Shrieking Daisies. They were magical daisies that yelled when you took them out of the soil. They were similar to Mandrakes, but they wouldn't knock you out if you heard their cry.
I had just re-potted one when I started feeling dizzy. I ignored it, thinking it would go away. It didn't.
I suddenly saw the floor rushing up to meet me. I heard someone yell. My last thought was, before I passed out was, am I going to die?
When I woke up, I was lying in our spare bedroom. The bed was comfortable, but I didn't care about that. Dad was sitting on one side of my bed, looking worried, and Mum sat on the other side, crying. I felt bad.
On the couch on the other side of the room was Harry. He was asleep. He looked exhausted. I felt guilty, surely I hadn't caused all this?
Dad noticed that I was awake. He stood up and came closer. He just stood there, looking at me. I noticed that he was studying me. Mum stopped crying and put her hand on top of mine. I looked at her and smiled softly. I looked back at Dad. He looked like he was deciding to either look pained or angry. Thankfully, he chose pained.
"Emma," he said softly, his voice laced with sadness. "Why?"
I started sobbing. My crying awoke Harry, he came over to me and sat on the edge of my bed. I just cried harder. The truth was, I didn't know why. It's just what Alicia and her friends had said.
"I'm sorry," I said as soon as I could finally talk without sobbing. "I didn't mean to."
"Didn't mean to? You almost died, Emma," he said the words softly, but I could hear the anger behind his words. I realized that he'd been scared that I would die.
"How long was I. . . .unconscious?" I asked.
"Two weeks," Mum said. "We had to keep you asleep because we had to let your body repair itself. Harry only got here a couple of days ago. You were at St. Mungo's for a while, but then they sent you home. We had to let you sleep."
"I'm sorry," I said quietly. Tears ran silently down my face. I didn't want to cause them any pain.
"Mum will help you get dressed. Then, we're going to have a long talk in the dining room," Dad said. He motioned to Harry, and they left.
"I'm sorry, Mum," I said. She looked at me and sighed.
She summoned some of my clothes to me. I took off my clothes that were on my body. I looked down.
I could see my ribs. It was horrible. I was pale, and I had a bruise on the left side of my stomach. I sighed and reached for my shirt.
"The bruise is from when you fell at school," Mum explained. I finished dressing and went downstairs.
"You had an eating disorder, Emma," Dad said gently. It was like he was talking to a sacred child. I was a little freaked out, but I ignored it.
"I know," I whispered. I hugged my knees to my chest. I felt horrible for causing my parents so much pain.
"You weigh 65 pounds. When you passed out in school, it was from malnutrition. Tell me one thing, Emma, why? Why did you starve yourself?" Dad said. He said it softly. I could detect pain and anger in his voice.
"Alicia," I whispered.
"Alicia Faye?" Mum asked. "I know her mother."
"Why?" Dad repeated.
"She," I started. Dad nodded for me to continue. "Back in January, she told me that I was fat and that she didn't know how Sam could date me. She made me feel worthless."
Dad growled angrily to himself. I flinched. He noticed and relaxed, not wanting to frighten me.
"So, she told you that you were fat?" Mum asked softly. I could see anger plain on her face. Trust me, never make my mum angry when she's pregnant. It's not the best thing in the world.
"You lied to us for months. You could of come to one of us. You didn't have to starve yourself. We taught you better than that!" Dad's barely concealed anger began to show. He was extremely angry. I think he was angry because I had starved myself and it was all Alicia's fault.
"I'm sorry," I said for what seemed the hundredth time that night.
"Next time, tell us when something's bothering you. Now, you're going to have to stick to a special diet that a Healer told us to have you follow," Dad said. "Now, Sam's looking for you. He can stay for an hour, then he has to go home. You need rest."
Sam came over. He was sad and disappointed. He was extremely angry when I had told him that it was Alicia who said that he wouldn't want to date a fat pig.
He told me that he'd be there fore me, whenever I needed him. I smiled and he gave me a soft kiss on the lips. He then told me that he loved me and didn't ever think that I was fat.
Dad came in a few minutes and told us that Sam had to go. We said goodbye. He gave me a kiss, then he was gone.
"I cannot believe what your daughter did," Dad's voice floated through the kitchen door. He was talking to Alicia's father and he wasn't happy. "Put her on the phone, please."
There was silence. Then, Dad snorted. "Ha, I doubt she did that. She told me the whole story. Alicia, I'm extremely angry right now, don't even try to reason with me. My daughter almost died because of your stupidity."
Silence again. Then Dad said, "Keep your comments to yourself, please. You must be very glad that I'm not your father or you teacher. I want you to never, ever, tell anyone that they are worthless, or even imply it. Emma could have died, and you could have been sent to jail."
He listened to what Alicia was saying. Then he said, "Yes, you can go to prison for murder. You were the cause. Now, put your father back on the phone."
He waited. "Hello again, Mr Faye. No, I'm not going to press charges, but tell you daughter to never try to hurt someone like that again."
He was silent for a minute. "Thank you. Goodbye."
Dad hung up the phone. The door opened and I stood there, shocked. He smirked at my shocked expression.
"Now, go to bed. Your body isn't healed," Dad said. I went upstairs to my bedroom. Harry was sitting on my bed.
He gave me a hug. I laid down on my bed and Harry laid next to me. He told me, without words, that'd he'd be there whenever I needed him.
We feel asleep together. I didn't care about my weight anymore. I had my family, and they loved me.
AN: I chose to write this chapter about this because, sadly, many girls (and boys) have this happen to them. I've never had an eating disorder. I've based this all off what I've learned in my health class. I'm really sorry if some information is wrong.
Please leave me a review and tell me what you think about my story. I love reading them. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed.
Also, thanks to Lilausty for the amazing banner, I love it!
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