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If I'd yelled 'SOAP' nobody would have come! by thisbehecate
Chapter 1 : 'SOAP'!
 
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A/N: Alas, nothing has changed. I am still poor... therefore, I still don't own the world of Harry... ~sigh~ I can only dream... and torture Snape of course! That's always a good time. Always worth a good laugh...





Harry was seated in the headmasters office. The bottom half of his robes were wet, and covered in bubbles. Snape, who stood behind Harry, was completely covered in soap bubbles, looking a bit like a melting, evil snowman. There were odd little creatures covered head to toe in the white foam, roaming around the office as well. In their current state, there was no way of knowing they were house elves, but they were.

It was a moment before P Dibby spoke. If he slipped and laughed like he was afraid he just might do, Snape just might curse him, boss or not, Snape was that ticked.

Taking a deep breath, Dumbledore finally thought he had enough control to speak without allowing a giggle to slip out. It was difficult. He had to completely ignore his potions professor, which was almost impossible, as he stood directly behind the student he had to speak with. He also could not allow his eyes to wander to the little masses of bubbles that were his elves.

"Now, Mr. Potter." Even just seeing Snape out of the corner of his eye was torture for the old man. "Before we get to what took place during class, let's speak of why you were late for class."

"Well, you see, P. Dibby," Harry spoke. "It was an odd circumstance, really! Lately, I've been having this odd ringing in my ears, I have no clue what it is though. I've also had a cold."

"Oh?" Dumbledore asked, concern in his voice. He accidentally allowed his eyes to slip away from Harry, landing on Snape, and his face quickly turned purple from effort to not laugh, his eyes quickly snapped back to Harry, tears already forming, wanting to fall from the hysterical laughter dying to escape from between his lips.

"Yes." Harry continued, a huge grin stretched across his face from the expression on his headmasters. "It's been the oddest thing though. Did you know we have a door bell on the head-boy dorms? And we also have a kitchen?"

"Of course."

"You see, I was in the shower and the doorbell rang but I didn’t know it at the time."

"That you were in the shower?"

"No, that it was the doorbell. See, my head cold in combination with the ringing in my ears made me think that it was the kitchen timer."

"How very unusual."

"I know! So I spent several minutes trying to find out what it was I had finished cooking. And by then the time I realized it was the door, I’d almost forgotten I’d taken a shower."

"Who was there?"

"Where?"

"At the door."

"Oh, I didn’t answer it."

"I hope this won’t become a habit."

"No, see I always answer my door."

"I was referring to being late."

"Oh, right, Sir. Of course not."

"Good, good!" Dumbledore continued. From behind him, Harry heard Snape give a snort of disbelief and mumbled something under his breath.

"Now, Harry, as to what happened during class..." Dumbledore looked back up at Harry with a questioning look, and waited for an answer.

"Well, Sir, I just wanted to help the house elves. I mean, Hermione's always after us to help them. I just thought... I'd do my own laundry."

For the first time since they were in the office, Snape spoke.

"So you decided to do your laundry in potions class, using an unknown potion, while I was out of the class? Very smart, Potter."

Harry didn't respond.

"Well," Dumbledore said to fill in the odd silence. "I'm sure the house elves appreciate your kindness, but next time, try not to do it in your cauldron, yes?"

"No problem, P Dibby. Oh, Sir!" Harry directed his next words to Snape. "I just wanted to say that um... my homework got ruined in the laundry. Sorry."

With that, Harry stood, and brushed past Snape the Evil snowman, who snarled at him as he passed, and was about to leave the office when Dumbledore spoke again.

"Why did you set off the fire alarm? There was no fire."

Harry paused and turned back around to answer.

"Because, if I yelled 'SOAP', nobody would have come!"





R & R people!!!!

:)




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