Chapter 2 : Play Along
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The following days it seemed as if he was everywhere I looked, Lucas I mean. There was no way that I could avoid him, not only was he in the same house as I, but he was also quite good friends with Albus and James, perhaps they had first become friends while being on the same Quidditch team for as long as they could remember, or maybe they had become friends because they were all in Gryffindor. Lucas was also in the same classes as I was. His dark blonde hair was in the corner of my eye in Potions, his dark blue eyes occasionally met mine in Transfiguration and I hurried to look away, now and then we bumped in to each other and I felt his toned body against mine for less than a second. He was literally everywhere I looked, apart from the library, no, Lucas would never set foot inside the library. Something I was forever thankful for. It was my hiding place; I was there more than I had ever been.
I walked away from the Great Hall after a long day of studying, and I knew that if I were to go back up to the tower then Lucas would be there, and I really couldn't stand being in the same room as him, I didn't know if I would ever. Not only because he constantly reminded me of what I had found him doing, not that he made me want to throw up just by looking at me, no.. Because I was still hopelessly in love with him. Those feeling aren't something that goes away all that easy.
He had been my first, in so many ways. My first kiss, my first love, and my first lover, my only lover. Those things made my feelings towards him so much stronger, and the worst part about it was that no one even seemed to notice that we were no longer a couple.
Melinda, however, was flirting openly with both Lucas and James, but James was true to his word and kept avoiding her, somehow I felt that Lucas was doing anything but avoiding her. I was really glad that she was a Ravenclaw and not a Gryffindor, I'm not sure that I would stand being around her at all times.
I rounded a corner and walked in to the library, walked towards my regular place while thinking about all the things I wanted to do to Melinda. But I was snapped back to reality as I reached my table, I couldn't sit down there seeing as someone else had taken my bloody seat. There was no question about who it was as I saw the platinum blonde hair that could only belong to one person in Hogwarts. He and Lucas was about the same length, but Malfoy was slightly more muscular. Probably from playing Quidditch, he played chaser on the Slytherin team. I shook my head to stop thinking about his looks and put my hand on my hip.
“Malfoy, what are you doing?” I asked in a hiss and stared at him, he sure didn't rush his movements as he slowly tilted his head up to look at me. His eyes, so different from Lucas' dark blue ones, were silver grey, and held a depth that no other eyes I had looked in to held.
“What does it look like I'm doing?” He replied and held up his book. “It's called reading, if you couldn't guess.”
He went back to reading and left me standing there, staring at him like a fool. “I can see that you're reading.” I snapped at him, getting annoyed. “What I meant was, what are you doing, sitting by my table?”
“Yours, Weasley?” He didn't look up from his book. “I didn't know this was Weasley property.”
“Oh, you know what I mean. I've been sitting on the same spot for the last six years!”
He turned the page in the book and replied lazily. “Really? Must have missed that. Well, now I'm sitting here. So, go find another table or sit down and shut up. I am trying to read.”
“Missed it?” I echoed, ignoring the last part. “How the hell could you have missed it? You've been sitting right behind me all those years! You know what...” I was trying to find something really smart to say but my brain failed me. “Fine.” I sighed as I knew that he wasn't going to move. I clenched my jaw as I walked to sit by another table.
Arrogant idiot, that was what he was, nothing more and nothing less. He annoyed me to no end, but yet I was glad that he did; it gave me something to think about other than that jerk of an ex boyfriend of mine.
I shook my head as I found that I had been staring at Malfoys back for the last ten minutes, if I had been looking any longer then there would be two burning holes in his back, that's how intense I had been looking at him.
Why I had been, I had no idea. I opened my book and began to read. Alexander had just confessed his love for Caroline, but she refused to believe him... In a matter of seconds, I was lost within the book.
Making my way up to the tower was always stressful, as I always sat in the library until just a few minutes before curfew. Malfoy had been the one reminding me that I had to leave unless I wanted detention.
By the time I reached the portrait of the Fat Lady, I was panting heavily; running while carrying books that weighted a ton wasn't very good for me, or it was. It just didn't feel like it.
“Fizzing whizbees.” I said, while still panting, trying hard to catch my breath.
“I'm sorry. Password incorrect.” the Lady said and gave me a small smile. I sighed and tried to reason with her. But she wouldn't let me in. Why the hell would they change the password in the middle of the day, anyway? It didn't make any sense.
“Fine. I guess there would be no use in knocking, either?” I groaned as she shook her head.
“They wouldn't hear you.”
I sunk down against the wall and pulled out a book, hopefully I wouldn't be caught and forced to serve detention for not getting in. Detention would be... I wouldn't know, I had never gotten detention for anything. Minutes passed and I started to get tired, the letters in the books became blurred together and then as if someone had been shaking me; I was wide awake again.
The portrait had swung open and someone stuck their head out. I realized who is was and hung my head down in the book again, pretending that I hadn't seen him.
“Rose? Why on earth are you sitting out here for? It's passed curfew.” Lucas voice was soft and caring as he spoke, but the memory of his moans was still too fresh for me to forget.
“I didn't know that there was a new password.” I said truthfully as I stood, avoiding eye contact as much as I could.
“Oh. The new password is 'Mehmet credo'.” he actually smiled. “Come on in, Rose.” He held up the portrait for me and I could hear the Fat Lady sigh. I wondered briefly if he knew what 'Mehmet credo' meant, but he probably didn't.
I accidentally brushed against him as I walked past him in to the common room, I found that Albus, James and Lucas was the only ones up. “Where's Hugo?” I asked to which they shrugged.
“Probably asleep. Now, love birds, have a seat. We'll hang out, like old times.” I glared at James, and shook my head as I turned to walk up to the girls dorm. “Oi, Rose! Where are you going?”
“I'm.. tired.” I lied, I was no longer tired, just desperate to not spend any more time close to the jerk who had not just broken my heart, he had ripped it out of my chest and jumped on it, spit on it and then left it, bleeding on the ground.
“Bullshit. Lucas, go get her.”
Lucas looked from James to me and visibly flinched back as he saw my glare up on him. None the less he came up to me and leaned down.
“Play along, will you?” His voice was still soft and low. “They don't need to know yet, we can pretend that we're still...”
“How? How can we pretend to be together when I can't even stand looking at you?” I hissed so that only he heard. “Hm? Tell me that, Lucas and I'll play along.”
His eyes darkened before he hung his head. “I'm sorry for what I did, Rose. I really am. But please, don't let them find out just yet.”
“You're actually begging me to not tell them? Have you lost your fucking mind? You know what, why don't you just as Melinda to join you, I bet she would be up for it. Seeing as you're not the only one she has the hots for of you three.” With that I left him, by the look on his face, he was furious. Whether it was because I had rejected him, or if it was because of what I had told him about Melinda; I didn't know. I just knew that I never wanted to talk to him again. It just hurt too much.
The next day started out like any other Saturday, I woke up early and brushed my teeth before I got dressed, I put my hair up in a ponytail and then I walked down to sit on the couch in the common room. It wasn't until then that the Saturday started to look different. Normally, Lucas would have come and joined me and we would have kissed and enjoyed the time alone that we had in the mornings, but this Saturday, him not being there was a fact.
Instead of sitting there and being overwhelmed by the many, horrible memories, I decided to talk a walk in the castle. It couldn't hurt, right?
I threw the bag over my shoulder and headed out. People were running around everywhere, I honestly didn't think that many people would be awake this time of day, but it was a pleasant surprise.
I could make out James face in the crowd and wondered briefly what could have made him get out of bed so early. He waved happily and I smiled at him, as I made my way through the mass of people to get to him, I bumped in to someone quite hard and turned to apologize when I saw that it was Malfoy.
We said it at the same time and I hurried to look away from him, still annoyed over how he had acted the night before. I finally got to James and he hit me playfully on the arm.
“Was that Malfoy you ran in to?” He asked while looking over my shoulder. “Real git, isn't he?”
“Yeah, sure.” I said half heartedly. “I haven't seen Hugo since dinner last night, where the heck is he?”
“Dunno. But your boyfriend is over there.” He said with a smile and pointed towards Lucas. I felt like screaming out that we weren't together any more, but I just faked a smile and tried to change the topic. “Don't try, Rose. I've noticed that you've been acting very cold towards him lately, what are you doing? Are you trying to push him away? Do you want to break up with him or what?”
I glared at him and huffed. “What is this, twenty questions?” Dear cousin, if you only knew...
James looked at me closely, as if he was trying to read my mind. “James, you're not a Legilimens. Give up.” I snapped at him and he just raised his eyebrows.
“You don't really need more rumours going around that you're a cold hearted, prude bitch?” He asked, not in any way rude, more like caring, actually. I stared at him, knowing that he was right, but then again... Did I really care? Nah. I wanted to tell him, I really did but I couldn't. Because if I did, then it would be real. If I spoke it out loud than it would become real and I didn't want that. But, me being me, decided to do something that would definitely put a stopper to James worries and questions.
“You want me to show my lovely boyfriend that I love him?” I asked coldly.
“Yes,” James made it sound like a dare, and I desperately wished that I could back out now, but I wouldn't.
Instead I looked over at Lucas, he was sitting alone, but he was looking at Melinda, who sat one table away from the Gryffindor table. I took a deep breath before I walked over there with my head held high, and sat down next to Lucas, who tore his eyes away from Melinda to look at me wide eyed.
“I'll play along.” I said coldly and then he did something that I didn't expect, he brought his hand to the back of my head and pulled me close to him as he captured my lips in a hard and demanding kiss, making sure that most people saw. I tried to ignore the throbbing pain in my heart as Lucas pressed closer and let his tongue dance with mine as if nothing had ever gone wrong between us. I broke apart as I felt my eyes tearing up, and looked him right in the eye. “Is James looking?” I said, ignoring how broken my voice sounded. It hurt, it hurt so bad.
“Yes,” he said just after he looked over his shoulder. “As is the rest of the school. What changed your mind?”
“James. He wouldn't drop it, so I.. I have no idea what I was thinking,” I felt cold inside as I got up and brushed a tear away but I didn't get far as Lucas stood up behind me and took my hand. “What the hell was I thinking?” I mumbled to myself.
“Rose, don't go.”
“Let go of me, Lucas,” I said slowly, as I pulled my hand away from his grasp. “I need to be alone.”
“Right. Go to the fucking library again, like you always do,” Everyone looked at him, apart from me as he raised his voice. “That's what you do, you're always hiding behind books!”
“Is that so?” I said without emotion but on the inside I was breaking, one small piece at the time. I shouldn't have kissed him, it was probably the stupidest thing I had ever done. I lowered my voice even more so that he was the only one who heard. “At least I don't fucking cheat and lie.”
I could feel how the tears started falling and I knew that I had go get out of there was fast as I possibly could. I pushed my way out of there, as many people were standing there, just looking at us. They all followed me with their eyes as I forced my way through.
I brushed away the tears with the back of my hand, terribly glad that I didn't wear mascara at the time.
Concerned voices asked me if I was okay, wondered what had happened and tried to stop me in order to hug me, but I shrugged them off and all I wanted to do was scream, The cold hearted, prude bitch doesn't want your pity!
James looked at me, with a expression I had never before seen on his face as I walked past him, then I turned and looked him dead in the eye.
“Happy now, dear cousin?”
“Rose...” he said and looked at me sadly and confused, but I just waved it away and kept walking until I reached the door, and well outside; there weren't many people so I didn't have to try to hold the tears back, instead I walked directly to the library.
The library was empty, I noticed as I walked in there, apart from me and... Yes, of course Malfoy was there. Wasn't he always?
And he was sitting by my table, again. I chose to ignore him completely and went to sit by the table that I considered to be his and opened my book. My tears had stopped falling somewhere along the way and all that was left was the pain I felt inside. But that had been there for a while now, so I had grown used to it.
“I heard you in the Great Hall.” I looked up as I found that Malfoy had turned around to look at me, turning his whole torso in my direction, making sure that everyone who would have seen him could see that he was talking to me. Willingly talking to a Half-blood.
“I think most people heard us.” I muttered back and glanced down, wishing that he would just follow everyone else's lead and leave me alone.
“He is partly right. You are hiding behind books.” He said slowly and casually as if he was talking about the weather. I was about to snap at him but he held up his hand, making me hold my tongue.
“I can see why you would do it, I do it too. You might have noticed.” He gestured around in the library and I sighed in defeat and nodded.
“Yeah... But there isn't rumours going around that you're a prude, cold bitch, is there?”
“No, they settled for calling me 'son of a Deatheater'.”
I almost wanted to say: Well, at least they're right about you. But I decided against it. “Right.”
“Just so you know, I don't think there's anything wrong with books, just... Don't hide behind them, Weasley.”
I looked at him for a long moment. “I'll stop hiding behind them when you do.” He grimaced and I gave a small smirk. “Exactly. Now, would you be kind enough to let me finish the book?”
He didn't say anything else, just turned away from me and hung his head over his book and I did the same. But I kept glancing up at him, wishing that he could tell me. Tell me how to do so I wouldn't hide behind books any more. I thought about asking him, but then I reconsidered, he would probably just laugh at me anyway. Like I needed more humiliation after that scene in the Great Hall.
I almost let out a groan as I thought of the fact that I needed to face them all up in the common room later, it would be horrible. I wish I could just sleep in the library instead, and never show my face again. I smiled at the thought then I saw that Malfoy had turned to look at me, and tried to suppress my smile, but I couldn't. I was surprised as he smiled back at me.
[Heya! A new chapter is up, I'm reallý having a great time writing this story. I decided to keep writing it since the response I got was really great so thank you all so much! Keep the reviews coming, eh? ;) Oh, and Mehmet Credo means ' I believe in myself' in latin. So;
What do you think about Lucas, and the fact that Rose actually considered playing along there for a while? How do you like the interaction between Rose and Scorpius as of yet? I'd love to hear what you think. Thanks! - Cathyyy- ]
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