Love With Loss
Confessions by the Lake
The grass was growing green at the beginning of another summer at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Lily Evans, on the other hand, enjoyed the night's stars even more than the itchy blades. She laid on her back staring up into the navy sky, waiting for it to lighten with signs of the morning.
A light breeze made its way from the Forbidden Forest making the grass tickle her face, and she sat up with a faint smile looking up towards her home in the castle. There her smile froze. Coming towards her was the boy she had hated as her worst enemy, who ironically understood her almost more than anyone else. She called herself stupid every time she thought about her and James's relationship. She hated him, but couldn't get enough of him at the same time. Somehow, he even understood that, but it was killing her best friend Severus.
'Oh, Sevy...' her mind was too full to think about him.
James was soon beside her, looking down at her form. She nodded telling him to sit.
They sat there silently for a few minutes until she finally blurted out, "I need help."
"Why do you think I came out here?" he smirked. Lily turned and gave him a serious look. "I'm just saying, why else would you send Black Jack to me unless it was something important?"
Lily remembered the confusion on her owl, Black Jack's, face when she said to take the note to James Potter. She had to smile a little at the thought.
"So what's wrong?" he asked leaning over a little to bump her side.
She looked over at James and stared into his eyes for almost a moment too long before catching herself.
"I did something that I shouldn't have done..."
"Oh my God...did Lily Evans cheat on the History of Magic test?!"
Lily's eyes widened with insult. "I would never!
James began laughing at her reaction. "I'm only teasing. Now come out with it, what've you done?"
Lily took a deep breath before being able to speak. "The other night...Severus kissed me."
"Will you shut up?! You're going to get us caught!"
James stood up and began pacing. The love of his life, Lily Evans, kissed his enemy. The boy who had called her and many others mudblood. The git that would soon be a death eater in Voldemort's army.
"I didn't know what to do! So I just stood there!" She watched James practically running back and forth in the same spot trying to get himself to calm down.
"So it was sexual harrassment?" He asked nodding his own head for hers. "Then we can go tell Dumbledore and he'll be out of here before you can say 'broomstick'"
"What? No! It wasn't sexual harrassment! It was as innocent as all of those times you tried to kiss me." James scowled and shook his head. "James please, I asked you before anyone else because I knew you could help me through this. I don't know what to do..."
James looked down just in time to see a small tear rolling down her face before she hastily brushed it away. He'd never seen her cry before...
"Why is he so important to you anyways? That bastard is going to be making life a living hell with Voldemort once we get out of here."
"He's been my best friend since I was seven...I can't give up hope on him...I know he's a good person..."
"Lily..." James took a deep breath and rubbed his brow. "There are people in this world that just aren't good.
Like Lucius Malfoy. And we both know that Snivellus is right there in his circle of friends. Who do you expect he'll choose to be with when school is done? His group of friends that are all trying to take over the world, or....or a girl who's everything he's been told to avoid his entire life?"
Lily let another few tears escape, "He'll choose his friends. You know why, Potter?"
James sighed at the use of his last name. "I don't know Evans, why?"
"Because of you. When he stepped away from me I told him there was someone else and he knew it was you."
James's eyes snapped to Lily's pink face. "What? How?"
"He must have saw us that day in the corridor when we were patrolling."
James thought back to that glorious Monday night. He and Lily had been flirting back and forth the past couple of weeks and James figured now was better than any other time to finally convince Lily to be with him.
While they were walking down the pitch black hallway, James took hold of Lily's hand and stopped.
"James!" she laughed. "What're you doing?" A giant smile was plastered on her face from the touch of his hand.
He gave a small grin and lifted her small, soft hand to his daring lips. Lily's smile shrunk to a gentle curve of the lips, and waited for him to look up at her.
When he did, he could see in her eyes some passion that was headed his way. He pulled on her hand to bring her closer to his lean, muscular body and was relieved when she didn't pull away, or even worse, yell what a bloody pig he was.
Slowly, their heads came closer and they kissed with small touches. Lily released her hand from his hold and brought both of her arms up around his high, hard shoulders, letting her fingers roam through his wild hair.
James let out a small groan with victory that his fantasy was finally coming true. Her lips were just so soft, hands so powerful, and her gentle nature was slowly disappearing as she pulled harder on his hair. He gave his hands permission to feel her waist and almost went crazy at how good her curves felt.
Without meaning to be so rough, James pushed Lily up against the wall and forced his tongue inside of her mouth. She kissed him back with as much passion letting their tongues wrestle in a never ending match.
After a satisfying time of passion, James pulled back his head and rested his forehead on Lily's to take a breath. He then realized how close his hands were to Lily's breasts and just the thought of being able to touch them...he had to close his eyes and force his hands to move back down to her hips.
"Oh my God..." Lily breathed.
"I know." James laughed.
"We uh...we've got to finish our patrol." she said nervously tucking a strand of her beautiful auburn hair behind her ear.
And even though James could tell their passionate kiss had shaken her, he knew by her sighs, and holding of his hand that Lily wouldn't run away, and for once they would be together.
"How did he see us?" James asked snapping back from his blissful reminiscent.
"I don't know...he just looked in my eyes and said 'Potter...'" Lily shrugged.
"So...how do you feel about all of this then?"
"I don't know James...maybe...maybe we should hold things off between us for the summer." James's eyes widened
"What?!" he croaked.
"I think Severus and I need some time to spend together"
"Not like that!" Lily quickly corrected herself shaking her hands in front of James.
"How do you think he's going to take it Lily?! You leaving me to spend more time with him, and him only?!"
"I'll explain it to him so that he knows it's as friends only." She looked up at James and could tell he still didn't like the idea. "Why don't you trust me?"
James let out a frustrated sigh and roughly cupped Lily's face in his hands for a kiss. It didn't take long for their tongues to meet in the middle or for their hands to begin roaming over each other's bodies. He gently pushed her down to the ground and placed himself on top of her small body. His callused hands slid under her shirt outlining the top of her jeans, and tickled up the side of her waist, all the way to the wire of her bra.
She clawed at James's back showing her obvious liking for the shivers he was leaving on her body when-
"Okay! All done!" James exclaimed bouncing on to his feet.
"What?" Lily said still slightly dazed from their kiss.
"That'll keep you wanting more until summer is done."
"But that's 3 months away!"
"Well maybe you should've thought of that before you decided on this whole 'Save the Bastard' routine."
Lily sent him a small glare when all James could do was smirk with accomplishment.
Lily stood up with him and poked him in the chest, "You are being so arrogant right now."
James winked and started walking towards the castle. With a sigh, she caught up with him, holding his hand before they would make the long journey home, both only thinking what would happen that summer.
A/N:So....lol! That's, that! They get a little intense in the first chapter, but I think we all love that stuff between James and Lily. haha! reviews are always welcome :)