“So let me get this straight. You want to get back at Amos because he’s an asshole and the only way for you to get back at him is to date one of the marauders because he’s somewhat jealous of them because of their popularity and their luck with the girls, on and off the Quidditch pitch, and on some degree they are his enemies and if you dated one of then that would hit the nail on Amos Diggory’s head and in doing this, you will be torturing him into wishing he never let you go and treated you so badly and then he will realize what he’s missing?”
Okay, so maybe Klara didn’t see it the way I did.
“How did you even come up with this, Nat?!” She asks, completely bewildered that I had thought this up in one afternoon.
I sigh. “I figured I needed to do something to shake him. I think I deserve something for all those moments I wasted with him in our fake relationship, yeah?”
Klara frowns. “Yes, you do. But I’m not sure about this.”
“Klara, listen to me. He’s played me long enough. It’s my time to play with him. I don’t even know if the Gryffindors will go with it, but if it doesn’t work out, I’m going to try something else. I’m not going to stop until I let out all this frustration back at him. I’m not letting him go just like that without some payback.” I didn’t even realize that my voice sounded more and more menacing each and every time I spoke until I almost spit out the last word.
Klara eyebrow is quirked up to an angle. “Well, then.” She crosses her arms and almost smirks. “You have a sick way of dealing with things, that’s for sure.”
I roll my eyes. “Come on. Don’t you see why this is perfect?”
“He’s not going to expect it! Amos would never EVER expect this from me. That, my dear friend, is why it’s perfect. I’ll shake him up, more than he ever shook me. He needs to be taught a lesson. And no girl’s ever tried this before, because if he had gotten a taste of his own medicine before – Ah! Just thinking about it makes me so angry – If he had gotten a taste of his own medicine before, than he’d have gotten over himself and treated me with respect.”
“But what if he doesn’t get jealous?”
My lips do that disappointing pout thing. “Thanks for believing in me.”
“What?! I’m just saying! What if he gets over you faster than you think and doesn’t care who you date?” Klara shrugs. “If I’m going to be helping you with this then we at least need to think things through. I’m going to stick by you, Natalie. But this is dangerous. We’re dealing with a clan of Hogwarts boys. Need I remind you that this could all go up in flames? We need to deal with the worst possible scenarios first.”
I can’t help but smile. I lean back on the common room couch. I cross my legs as Klara gets a piece of parchment and her red quill. She’s going to help me with this. My strong unit, Klara Isaacs, is going to help me break down Amos Diggory, git extraordinaire.
“I can’t help but be a bit intimidated about this, you know… It’s like opening up a can of worms. This is boy world. It’s vicious, jealous, and conniving. And I certainly don’t want a front row seat to – why the hell are you looking at me like that?”
I grin at her befuddled expression. “Did I ever tell you how amazing you are?”
“Oh, shut up,” Klara smiles. “At least I’ll have something to do now. This is freaking crazy, but it’s exciting.”
I giggle as she writes something down on her parchment. Klara’s definitely the one who’s better at planning things. I’ll let everything be planned and set according to her. She’s one of the smartest people I know. No doubt she knows what she’s doing.
You know what I just realized? Klara and I are gonna make history!
“Let’s break him,” she says, at the end of ten minutes. She hands me the parchment and I read off what she’s written.
“Six Ways To Break Down Amos Diggory?” I almost laugh out loud.
“Well, when you say it like that!” She defends, taking it from my grasp. The cackling noise from the fire place sets the background music for our discussion.
“Let me read it to you.”
I nod. “Alright.” I’ve never broken a man before, and I have no idea how to do this. I probably wouldn’t even be going through this if she didn’t help me. I mean I can bluff to myself, but I don’t think I would be where was I now if she didn’t just agree with me moments ago. Thank goodness she’s here to guide me!
“One, break down his confidence. We have to make him feel vulnerable, upset, or insecure, so we can crack his outer shell. I’m thinking about getting some girls to say some bad things about him when he tries to chat them up. You and I can pay some girls to flirt with Amos and then find something to insult him about, like his arm muscles or the last time he’s showered or something. He’ll be sniffing himself thinking he smells like a horse.”
“Hah! That’s brilliant!” I hand clap for Klara’s awesomeness.
“Two, take away his posse. I was thinking about spreading rumors about him to get the fan girls to stay away. In doing this, he’ll start to believe what it says in number one; the girls were right to insult him, and Amos will think he’s losing his touch. He won’t feel popular anymore.”
“What will we spread about him?”
“I dunno… that he has syphilis?”
“Hm…” I ponder as she continues.
“Three, get his girl to date one of his rivals. And this is where you come in. By this point Amos will either try to get back with you because no other girls will take him, or because he actually misses you. I’d say it would most likely be the former.”
“Definitely the former.”
Is this really happening?
I’M DESTROYING A MAN!
I’m so excited.
“But when Amos starts looking for you, he’ll stumble upon you and which ever marauder you’re with. And it’ll cut him like a knife. His girl, ex or not, hooking up with one of his rivals? That’s going to bruise his pride and rub salt on his wounds. If the reaction goes the way we plan it out to be, he’ll be as jealous as a soap opera star. He won’t be able to contain himself. He’s bound to get moody when this happens, so he’ll be pushing away his friends and his close mates. Maybe even blowing off his school work. And if we really hit him hard… He’ll miss you and want you back. If you can make some other boy happy in front of him, he’ll get off his high horse. But that’s only going to happen if we tear him down the first two times. If not, he’ll want you back within the next couple of steps…”
“Well, wait. What if the marauder I’m gonna supposedly date doesn’t want to do it? Can we trust them with this?”
Klara almost rolls her eyes. “They’re Gryffindors, Nat. If we can trust anyone, it’s them. Besides, there’s no reason why they wouldn’t hop on this train. They hate Amos.”
“I guess you’re right.” I bite the inside of my cheek and sink further into the couch.
“Four, take away his boys. If Amos acts as bitchy as we’re predicting, his guy friends will be so fed up with him that having a conversation with Amos will only turn to an annoying rant. With out his boys to turn to in his time of anguish, he’ll have no one left to talk to. After getting his act together and finally trying to talk to his mates while he is pushing them away, his boys that supposedly care – they won’t be caring at all. Now, by this point, Amos will be completely secluded. And he’ll only have a few pals to hang out with.”
“Father of Merlin.” I put my hands on my face. “This was more complicated than I thought!”
“Hey, this was you’re idea. I’m just putting it down in writing. We need steps. This is something that can’t just be acted upon quickly without consult,” Klara says simply.
“Five, make him wish his life was back to normal. Do things in front of him. When you’re with your marauder, do things in front of him that you and Amos used to do together. He’ll be envious and he’ll remember how things used to be. Hang out and say hi to his friends in front of him. And, I dare say, dress a bit more… Revealingly.”
I wave her off. “Psh, I’m already going to be doing that on step three.”
She smirks. “Oh, really? Eager now, are we?”
I blush. “Well, I want him to be jealous of me and who ever I’m with, anyway. I might as well get the full jealousy effect from him. I have to look my, um – hottest?”
Klara shoves my shoulder. “I cannot believe you.”
I stick out my tongue.
“Six, act friendly towards him. I know that you’re probably going to want to punch his face in, but if you do this – he’ll be so confused. And grateful at the same time!”
I throw my hands up. “What?! I am not going to be nice to him!”
“Act friendly towards him, Nat. That’s all I’m saying. Show him that you’re over it. If he sees you happy enough to talk to him, he’ll realize how awesome your life is while his in the dumps! Think this through with me now. He doesn’t have Quidditch to worry about, he won’t have friends to hang around with, and no one is going to send him love notes anymore. Amos will be a complete hermit.”
“OH.” My eyes go wide.
You know, I never really thought it would come to this. Me breaking up with Amos. Amos not changing one bit. Me wanting revenge enough to act on it. Amos not seeing it coming.
It’s a lot to think about. I’m actually quite nervous now. I’m going to have to pretend everything. What if I can’t pull it off? What if I sweat it and I break my cover? He’ll see right through me. Dear, God; that would be a nightmare! I never thought it would get this complicated. We have a routine and a set of plans now. And I just wanted him to see me with one of his enemies!
“I never thought this would turn into a master plan,” I say, a bit awed at the situation I’ve put myself in.
“It’s so much more than just getting him back, Natalie,” Klara assures. “I’m as scared as you are. But if I don’t help you with this then you’re going to throw yourself through a pit of fire by yourself. I knew that you wouldn’t know where to start so I had to come up with something just now. And I’m helping you with this, because you have a right. I believe that what you have as your mindset is true. You are every girl that was never appreciated. You are every girl whose been cheated on. You are every girl that’s never felt she was good enough.”
“When you put it like that-”
“Do this. For every girl in your shoes. Give them something to laugh about. They deserve it. After all those boys that have laughed at them in return. Amos was one of the many cruel jokers. And you’re going to have the last laugh.”
I hold my head up high. “You really are good with words,” I tell her bluntly.
The rules are set. The game is on.
Klara and I decided after dinner to go look for the marauders. Unfortunately we couldn’t find all four boys. We looked everywhere; in the courtyard, on the Quidditch pitch, any places they could possibly be. We reasoned that they were already in their dormitories. But then we took one last look in the library and there, sitting by themselves, were Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew. No Sirius Black or James Potter in sight.
We agreed that it was better to have half of the marauders then nothing, so we approached them anyway.
“What the crap?” Peter Pettigrew blurts out. Remus elbows him in the stomach, silencing him. He turns to look at us and gives us a polite smile, while Peter rubs his new bruise and curses his friend under his breath.
“What Wormtail means to say is-” But Klara cuts him off.
“The reason why we want to do this-”
“No, no, no.” Remus shakes his head and holds his hand up. “We know why.”
Klara blinks. “You do?”
“Yes. Amos is an arrogant prick. He pisses us marauders off. And he always tries to turn everything into a contest. In boy world, we call him ‘that guy’. Anything that constitutes in him taking the piss is fair game to anyone.”
I slowly turn to Klara, both of us having the same unsure face.
“Well,” I mumble to her. “At least they understand.” She gives me a pointed look and continues.
“Then what is it that you and Peter are worried about... if you know why we want to do this?”
Remus then begins talking about how the guys would react to this, and how we’d even start the plan. And, of course, what would be in it for the guys, if they considered being part of it with us.
“I think that what you guys are doing is great. Diggory needs to be taught a lesson – and I’m sorry, Natalie, I had no idea. He deserves some serious karma after all those people he screwed over. Including you,” Remus finishes. “Peter and I will be behind you if you need anything, considering we haven’t started yet.” I try to stop the smile that’s creeping up on my face, but I can’t. Wow, they agreed! They’re going to help us! This is wonderful!
Remus hesitantly looks at Peter before slowly turning his neck back around at us.
“What?” Klara asks slowly.
“Well, we have to run this by Sirius and James first, you know that.”
“Oh. Yeah, we know,” I say.
“Er, and then if they’re for it, we’re all going to have a thorough talk about all of it,” Peter pipes up. “Including the whole discussion about which one of us Natalie is going to, um…”
I instantly stiffen.
I have to date one of them. I have to date one of the marauders for this to work... how did that slip from my mind. This part is so vital...how could I have momentarily forgot about that!?
This is just a bit awkward now… And Peter’s fidgeting is not helping.
Nor is it making my face any less red.
“Eh, the dating thing. Yeah, that’ll be loads of fun. Can’t wait to talk about that.” Klara waves off, not interested in the slightest. I whip my head around at her, and she kind of smirks. My face becomes flat in a nanosecond.
Keep your cool, Natalie…
“So… we’ll run it through our boys. And I’ll let you guys know about everything and we’ll talk it through as soon as we can get together,” Remus concludes with a tight lipped smile.
I feel like I’m at a school debate. Or a court room.
“Sounds good. Pleasure doing business with you,” Klara tells him. Remus and Klara both stand up and professionally shake hands, their eyes fully focused on one another.
And then there’s Peter and I, looking a bit petrified at the seen before us; as we’re both still seated, we look up at them and feel like we’re at the grocery story with our parents.
They’re like our attorneys!
Remus nods at me… the way Oxford students do. “Natalie,” he salutes, as he walks away with Peter behind him.
“Well, he’s a more decent fellow then I thought. Very professional, he is,” Klara tells me, whilst secretly eyeing his bum as he walks.
I roll my eyes in response.
Oh, God. What am I getting myself into?
A.N. - Did you like!?! :]
Leave comments, lovelies! I know it could have been longer, but I didn't want to rush anything. This is going to be a long process... And the real fun will begin shortly ;]