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The Burn-Out Heart by Rose Wilts
Chapter 11 : Chapter 11- A Change of Disposition
 
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 6


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I rolled over in bed, the sheets tangled around my legs and instead of rising to my feet gracefully as I had planned I fell to the floor in a crumpled heap. 

My head was on fire, not quite literally this time, but it might well have been for the amount of grief it was giving me.
I was feeling a lot better than I had expected. No nausea, no hallucinations, but I was sore, so sore. 


After a moment of scrambling for my wand I finally extricated it from the sheets around me. I was still in the clothes I had worn the night before, minus the shoes of course.
With a casual flick the pain was gone. I couldn’t have been happier. 

After allowing myself a relieved sigh I rose at last to my feet and dressed, thankful it was a Saturday, and a warm one at that. I could feel the heat of the sun shining 
through the dormitory curtains already. 

I therefore dressed lightly in a blood red sundress. I entered the shared bathroom in the middle of the circular room. I washed my face, removing the last traces of sleep with my wand. I pulled the dark, straight strands of my hair back into a loose ponytail and popped on some shoes and lip balm. After that I felt much better. 


On an impulse decision I leapt down the dormitory stairs. There was hardly a person in the room; I knew they were all outside lapping up the sunshine. I would be joining them soon, but first I needed my brother. There was something I wanted to tell him. 


You see, the ‘almost kiss’ with Sirius as I had now named it, had made me understand something.
I had realized, after hours of tossing and turning last night, that if I had put in a little more effort to fit in, stood out more, been a little more irresponsible, I would’ve kissed Sirius Black a long time ago. 

And the thing was I didn’t mind so much about the danger anymore. 

School for me was always going to be dangerous, there was always going to be that risk that I might lose control, that I might slip us as I had just once before. 

But Sirius’s glorious face, his smell, his feel was still fresh in my mind, and I knew I wouldn’t pass up that for the world. 


I bounded up the steps to the boys dormitories. I prayed no one was asleep before pounding noisily on the door. 
I could hear a couple of low oaths and some grumbling before the door was wrenched open. 


Jasper’s hair was more disheveled than I could ever recall seeing it; his face pasty and tired and he had nasty black bags underneath his eyes. He looked absolutely horrible, but I couldn’t restrain the laugh that slipped from my mouth.

“Sorry.” I chuckled inviting myself in and sitting on a spare bed, silently gratefully that his dormitory was also empty. “You really don’t look that bad.” 

He glared skeptically at me before using the same spell I had earlier that morning to revive himself. 

He looked much better, but the hair remained messy. 

“You woke me up.” He complained in a low moan, his voice hoarse from singing along to so many songs last night. 

I shrugged. “You were going to wake up some time.” He threw me an extremely dirty look. 

I almost laughed but there was something I had to do first, something I had never apologized for. I knew that if I didn’t do it at this moment, I never would gain the courage again. 

“Jasper?” 

He turned his head up slowly his expression looking only faintly concerned at my change of tone. 

“Jasper I’ve- I’ve come to a decision.” 

This time his head jerked up fully, he was no longer feigning interest. He was sitting by my side in one stride. 

“About what?” 

“About the argument we had.” I replied my voice remaining surprisingly calm. He still looked confused. 

“You said people were noticing us anyway. Despite the efforts we made to remain inconspicuous. I didn’t want to believe you. Then last night I realized that all the attraction, fitting in, being part of a group. Maybe it’s better than being on our own, not being close to anyone. We stick out more then; I don’t know how I didn’t see it before.”

Jasper nodded carefully. Underneath his serious expression I could see a smug and comforted smile threatening to burst through.

I continued on. 

“I’m sorry for refusing to believe it before, but you were right, as always. I just didn’t want to admit it. I think it’s time we showed them what Jasper and Tallulah Wiley are really made of.” I grinned at the last part and so did he. His face split into a huge smile.

“That’s right.” He agreed stripping out of his t-shirt and pulling on a clean white one. “It’s time to, to what? Break the rules?” He glanced at me unsure of how to best put it.

I pulled a face then smiled teasingly at him, getting to my feet and linking my arm through his in a pompous fashion. 


“It’s time to shine.” Jasper laughed at this.

“Maybe not quite literally…”

“My thoughts exactly.”

Together we made our way through the Hogwarts castle and out into the sun. 





I was sprawled out on my back, just like the day before when I had been invited to the party, only this time Jasper was beside me. 


He sat upright his body hunched over yet another issue of ‘Quidditch Quips’. A slight smile spread across his face as he read. Once more I found myself wondering what on earth he could find so amusing in that magazine. 


It was absolutely sweltering, by English standards anyway. My dress stuck to my body and my hair was plastered to my neck. My whole body shone with a thin film of sweat. It seemed the entire student population was out here. In the distance I saw Anna, 

Lucy, Greta and Elise sitting on a picnic blanket laughing, and not far from them the Ravenclaw Quidditch team were shouting and running about. Everyone was glowing from the heat. 


With a wary eye I contemplated the cool, green depths of the lake. There were already a few students in it... 


“Jasper?” I asked, trying to look serious as I said it. “Since we’re no longer law abiding citizens, would it be considered appropriate for me to join my fellow class mates in a swim?” 


Jasper cocked an eyebrow in hilarity; a roguish grin was already forming on his mouth. 


“Oh no, I can’t see why that would be considered inappropriate at all.” 


“Good then!” I leapt to my feet at once, magically transforming my red sundress into a 
swimsuit. A couple students looked at me interestedly. I felt my skin grow hot but of course, did not blush. I kept my head held high and feeling every bit self-conscious I turned to Jasper. He too was on his feet, his shirt already pulled up from over his head. 


“Want to race to the water?” He challenged, knowing very well that he was a faster runner than me, though not by much. I grinned wickedly. 


“You’re on.” 


And with that we were shooting off towards the waters edge, two involuntarily intimidating students having the time of their life. 

We flashed past stunned faces, whooping and razzing each other. I just glimpsed 
Anna’s and Elise’s astounded expression as we passed them, practically nothing more than a white streak. 


Our fair limbs flashed in the sun as we ran, the creamy flesh catching and reflecting the rays. 


Jasper went first landing with a crash in the water, a wave of the substance erupting around him. I went next diving headfirst into its now murky depths. 


The water was freezing, ridiculously so, but on this warm day it felt amazing. The fluid fit the curves of my body creating a slight pressure around my limbs. It was incredible. 


I flicked my sodden mop of hair behind my head, clearing my vision just in time to realize that Sirius Black and his marauder pals were also in the water. 

They were swimming a reasonable distance from us but we could still hear their raucous shouts. It appeared they were playing the muggle game ‘Marco polo’. 

I gave an amused chuckled and turned back to Jasper. He too was staring over at them.

He watched as Remus dunked James beneath the water, a slightly wistful expression on his face. 


I knew he wanted to join them. It could get a bit boring hanging out with your sister all of the time, I knew he was missing them already. 


I swam over to him, my arms slicing through the cool water. 



“Go on.” I urged. “Go and join them.”

Jasper glanced up; evidently a little peeved his expression had been so easy to read.

I encouraged him some more. “Don’t you remember?” I teased treading the water carefully. “Law abiding citizens no more.”

He threw me a playful smirk before whispering thanks and swimming over to greet them. 


I watched him go, his pale body, twisted almost ghost-like through the water. I heard them cry out various acknowledgements. I was particularly stunned when Sirius swam over, not nearly as fast as I could have managed and clambered onto Jasper’s back, plunging him deeper into the water. Both emerged seconds later, dripping wet and shaking with laughter. Apparently kissing another man was one of the many good ways of starting a friendship. 


I swam over to the bank again, sticking close to the rotting wooden pier. Water plants tickled my feet, and occasionally I could see a long tentacle poke out of the water in the distance. 


The sun beat down overhead and dried me off as I sat, a solitary figure, on the pier, determined to not look like a loner. 


I could still hear the distant shouts of various students, the marauders and now Jasper. I felt strangely alone, despite my resolve of not looking forlorn. 

I spotted Anna, Greta, Elise and Lucy waving at me from the shore and I waved back grinning. They were shaking their heads and laughing at the Quidditch boys who were busy showing off, having a great time, but I didn’t feel like joining them just yet. 


I decided to make the most of the cool water while I could. It wasn’t often you got a day so sunny. With a slight yawn I rose to my feet yet again. I wasn’t good at keeping my mind set. 


I placed my feet on the very edge of the pier, positive the timber would give way under my weight. The sun sparkled across the glistening water, it certainly was enticing. 


It was then, rocking on the brink, contemplating which dive to use when his arms snaked around my waist. 


My scream was muffled only because he placed a warm hand across my mouth. My arms flayed wildly in my panic and hair tips, steamed. After a moment of struggling I finally lost my balance and toppled into the water, dragging Sirius Black along with me. 




an- wow, those have been a few really fast chapter updates by me hey? He he. Just to clarify, Lulah and Jasper don't sparkle, it's just their skin is such a pale colour it refects the light. Anyhow, what did you think? Please, please, please review!


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