Chapter 1 : Easier
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Author’s Note: It has just occurred to me how many one shots I write and how much better they are then my stories. This doesn’t mean that I’ll quit writing my stories, but you know the thought occurred to me and I decided to share it with the world. Okay I’m done now. Please R/R.
She lies awake in bed trying to fathom why she’s in this predicament that she’s in. Pulling at her hair, writhing in discomfort, and desperately trying to stifle the sobs that threaten to break through her carefully constructed mask of assuredness, she’s ripping at the seams. How much longer she can continue this, this charade of happiness and contentment is up for grabs. It’s only a matter of time before she admits the truth.
She had been with Ron for years. They were getting married in a week. They were supposed to have a long and happy Arthur/Molly-esque marriage with plenty of kids. It was what was expected. It was supposedly ‘predestined.’ But Hermione knew better. She’s known better for a long time.
See there’s a difference between what the heart wants and what’s easy. And Hermione knows that better than most. Her heart has been craving someone else for years, but the fallout that would follow being with this man didn’t seem worth it. It was just easier to be with Ron. Easier to be with someone she didn’t love rather than disappoint the people she loved.
She knew where she wanted to be, where her heart was calling, but couldn’t bring herself to break it off with Ron for him. So she settles for an explosive friendship with Draco. There have been almost kisses that leave Hermione craving him in a way she’s never wanted Ron. And there have been declarations on his side of never being able to get her out of his mind and those three little words that make her feel so weak. She knows she’s in love with him too.
Only she can’t. Her loyalty won’t let her. So she’ll stare at Ron wordlessly, wishing she felt more and wondering why she doesn’t. She’ll even go through the motions that last week before she becomes Mrs. Ron Weasley. She’ll say all the right things and smile at all the right moments, but the truth will burn in her soul. She still doesn’t love him and she knows she never will.
And so she walks up the aisle, ready to give herself to a life of lies. A life she always imagined with Ron, but a life she wants with Draco. Ron says ‘I do’ and the minister will turn to her. She doesn’t listen to the words, she knows them by heart, and she’s imagined them a million times in her mind. Only when she thinks of them she’s saying them to another man.
Time is ticking by and the wedding comes to a standstill. She has to make a decision. She looks at Ron, the boy who has always been her best friend, but never quite lit that fire inside of her. Could she live a lie for him? Yes. She knows the answer is yes, she’s been living that lie for years. Only, would she be happy? That’s the question.
She’s always been a people pleaser. She broke up with Viktor because of how it seemed to upset her friends, she stayed with Ron cause it’s what everyone else wanted, she became an auror because it’s what Ron and Harry wanted her to do, she fought in a war and didn’t complete her last year of schooling to help Harry save the world. She was always doing things for everyone else. Wasn’t it high time for her to be selfish? No. She couldn’t be. It just wasn’t her. She was loyal, she was Hermione.
Just as she’s about to doom herself to a loveless marriage she sees Draco at the back of the church. She pleads with him to say something, to object, but he does nothing. This is a decision she has to make on her own. She needs to decide for herself what exactly constitutes her happiness. Is she really content to have to please people for the rest of her life or will she finally do something for herself, finally do what makes Hermione happy?
It would be so much easier to just say yes and she knows the words are on the tip of her tongue. She opens her mouth, but the words don’t come out. She looks at Draco and she realizes that she doesn’t want easier. She’s spent far too long settling for easier and now it was time to get what she wanted.
She takes off her ring and hands it to Ron, kissing his forehead as she cries. He tries to plead with her, tells her how much he loves her, but it’s falling on deaf ears. She can’t do this anymore and they both know it. The elephant that has always been in the room is trumpeting and she’s running to Draco.
She’s tired of easier and she’s ready for worthwhile. She’s ready for passion and she’s ready for fulfillment. She’s finally ready for Draco.
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