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Seeing Red by Girldetective85
Chapter 1 : Seeing Red
Rating: 12+Chapter Reviews: 12

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Author's Notes: This drabble was written for the Colors Challenge on eHPF, where we were prompted to choose a color and a pairing and connect the two.

Thank you to DesDiamondS, who issued the challenge and created the image above! And thank you to everyone who voted! :)

Seeing Red
written by:

I have found you, only to lose you.

I told you once that we could never be together, that things could never work out between the two of us. "We are too different," I said, trying to push away what I wanted the most. You looked up at me with brimming eyes, your hair a pale echo of the burgundy sunset, and told me to go to hell. "Why?" I asked. And you said because hell was the absolute worst place to go and that you'd be behind me every step of the way, through crimson flame and scarlet smoke, holding my hand through it all just to prove how much you loved me. And I knew right then and there that you were the one for me.

Life has been hard for me. I have been afraid to open up, to show my true self to people. I saved myself pain by hiding in shadows, reluctant to step even into the light of friendship. Had I known that you would arrive and sit quietly by me, bringing the light with you instead of forcing me out, I could have waited forever.

Did I know, sitting alone with a secret weighing down my heart, that one day a woman would love me for everything I am? Did I even imagine, staring at the sanguine teeth marks on my arm, that someday you would come and embrace the very thing that repelled everyone else? Had I never lain down my feverish head and dreamt of a world where my loved one's silhouette could eclipse the treacherous full moon?

Before you, I could only see red. You came and the universe presented itself to me in tints of rose, shades of ruby, hues of auburn, splashes of garnet. When we danced under the stars on that champagne-colored evening, your dress swept up a shower of coral petals, soft and delicate and gone all too soon when the breeze sighed over the halcyon waters.

I thought I couldn't possibly love you more, and then our son was born in all his splendor. Looking at the two of you, I felt that I could take on an eternity of moonlit nights without fear. But I was afraid, terrified that I would lose you both. I knew that I couldn't stay wrapped up in our own private world when somewhere out there, a great blood-red shadow threatened to take it all away.

And so I held our baby boy and gave you a final kiss goodbye. I left everything behind me for the angry titian glow of war, forcing you to swear that you would stay safe at home. It was the only promise to me that you had ever broken. When our eyes met across the struggling mass of good and evil, of right and wrong, I knew that I had looked into your beloved face for one last time.

There will be no more blazing sunsets for us, no more dances under the night sky. We will never hear our son's laughter in the hazy claret glow of a better world. But regret is a useless pastime.

If not for you, I would still only be seeing red.

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