Disclaimer: I own nothing.
A/N: Takes place while Lily is pregnant.
"LILY!!" I shouted once I got inside the house. I had been with Sirius all day and was dead tired. She came into the room and winced.
"Yes?" she asked, wincing.
"Nothing," I said. I shrugged and smiled. She didn't smile back.
"Then why, James, did you yell out my name just now?" she asked, eyes flashing.
"So you knew I was home," I answered quickly.
She closed her eyes and shook her head slowly. "James, James, James...you slammed the door so loudly, I would've known anyway."
Is...is that...is she making fun of me?! "Lily, Lily, Lily...what if you had been upstairs?" I asked reasonably.
"Then I would've heard your loud footsteps when you ran up the stairs," she retorted. She raised an eyebrow challengingly but I didn't know what to say to that.
"Okay, okay. Sorry. I shouldn't have yelled," I apologized quickly, avoiding an argument. She is pregnant...it's just her hormones. I walked up to her, quickly kissed her and walked into the kitchen. "What's for dinner?" I asked, looking in the fridge. I heard her sigh and she walked in.
"I haven't made anything yet. What do you want?" she asked.
I shrugged. "What do you want?" I asked her.
"Mmmm...not really hungry," she said thoughtfully. I gave her a look and she put her hands up in defense. "Okay, okay. I'll eat whatever it is you want," she said quickly.
"We got leftover spaghetti," I offered.
"You're the one who put it in the fridge and said we'd eat it later."
"I said that because you liked it, and I was afraid you'd get sick from eating so much. It was the only way you'd put it away!" she exclaimed.
"Oh, so you're playing mind games with me now huh?" I asked. She grinned at me cheekily and shoved me away from the fridge so she could look inside.
"James..." she said, dragging out the 'A'
"Yeah?" I asked warily.
"Can you maybe order something in? I have a headache. I don't really want to cook."
"Er...okay?" I said. I'm surprised. I thought it would be something horrible.
"Thanks," she said. We ordered pizza. She got sick afterwards, but it tasted good. Yummm..
For weeks, she kept saying that she had a headache everytime I brought the boys over, or I did something a bit loud...which was almost everyday. Eventually I had had enough of it. I accidentally knocked over a jar of pickles and winced.
"Uhm....oops," I said in a small voice.
"Perfect. Just what I need on top of this headache," she complained.
"Alright Lily. That's it. Come on," I said, grabbing one of her hands, and used my free hand to wave my wand to clean up the mess. I quickly apparated to a hidden alley in Muggle London and started walking down the sidewalk, dragging her along.
"James?" she asked.
"Yeeeeeeees?" I replied.
"Do you know where we're going?" She asked.
"Well, of course I do!" I said. I grinned when she huffed.
"Well, can you tell me?" she asked exasperatedly.
"Yupp," I answered cheerfully.
She waited a minute and then rolled her eyes. "Well, are you going to tell me?" she asked, her voice getting a bit shrill.
"Right! Heh heh...we are going to the doctor," I said determinedly.
She nodded. "Uh huh...and is there a reason we are going to the doctor?" she asked me.
"Yes actually. You've had that headache for quite a while now. You're going to get it checked out!" I said, opening the medical clinic door and pushing her in before walking in myself.
"What?" I asked.
"Holy front door. I don't need to go to a doctor James. I'm pregnant. I get headaches when I get irritable," she said.
"Well, you should stop being irritable," I replied.
"Well maybe I would if you didn't make me be irritable!"
"How the bloody fuck do I make you irritated?" I asked, shocked. She raised and eyebrow.
"Coming in and screaming my name? Knocking over jars? James. Who else stresses me out?" she asked. She was starting to get mad. Oh dear. Stupid hormones. She's like a bomb just waiting to blow up.
Eventually we were both yelling. Well...she was screaming at me for stressing her out. I was screaming at her and telling her to calm down. We had long since been kicked out of the clinic for frightening chlidren and were back at home.
"SHUT UP JAMES! ARGH!!" she started screaming.
Okay. That was it. "You know what Lily? I know this isn't you talking. It's the bloody hormones, so I'm just gonna say something real quick. FUCK YOU HORMONES! YOU'RE A CRAZY BITCH! NO! NOT LILY! I'M TALKING TO THE HORMONES! FUCK YOU HORMONES!"
She just looked at me, the fire in her eyes slowly dying. Her jaw dropped open and she keeled over, laughing. It took me a minute and then I realized I had just said the stupidest thing ever and blushed, looking away.
"Oh, wow...that was priceless, love. When did you watch Knocked Up?" she asked me between laughs.
"Uh...what's Knocked Up?" I asked. She looked at me, and started laughing again, tears streaming down her face.
A/N: review please! Okay, okay, okay...a bit of a wierd chapter, and a lot more swearing in this chapter than the other chapters I've written. As you may have been able to tell, I wrote this chapter fairly quickly since I'm supposed to be studying for my Science Exam right now, but I got bored of studying. So I thought...hmm? Why not make write another chapter? And yes, yes. I got a Knocked Up quote in there. Changed Alison's name to Lily though..cause you know..it would've been a bit wierd if I had written Alison there...
right! well, I'm outie gangstazzz...
take it easyy
Write a Review 25 Things James Thinks Lily Should Know About Guys: A headache that lasts for 6 weeks is a problem. See a doctor