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Harry Potter and the Dark Lord of the Dance by Dominick_Korshanyenko
Chapter 1 : Chapter 1: Weíve Reached Normalcy? Thatís Boring!
Rating: 12+Chapter Reviews: 3

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Harry Potter smiled happily as the curtain rose in front of him and the blinding lights of the stage shone to reveal him in a leather jacket and enormously gelled hair. Next to him is his friend Hermione who is wearing 80’s go-go boots and suddenly has poofy (more than usual) hair. They are standing in a deserted playground (for some reason that I may never understand) surrounded by all of their friends who are also look like they just came out of the alley. Music starts to play from below and the audience watches in awe as Harry and Hermione begin to sing.

HP: I got chills. They're multiplyin’ and I'm losin' control 'cause the power you're suplyin', it’s electrifyin'!

HG: You better shape up, 'cause I need a man and my heart is set on you. 

Harry and Hermione continue to sing their song as the rest of Hogwarts backs them up. When the number comes to an end the crowd gives a standing ovation and throwing various flowers and in the case of Mrs. F. McFinnigan a pie.

“Thank you, Thank you,” said Harry taking many bows.

“Mr. Potter what are you doing?” asked a very annoyed and astonished Professor McGonagall staring sternly at Harry who was on top of his desk bowing to the class.

“Nothing,” said Harry as he got down from his desk, turning a violent shade of red.

“As I was saying,” said McGonagall clearing her throat and returning to her lecture,” to turn solid gold into a pile of worthless junk one must only…”

Harry sighed and returned to his daydreams of Broadway stardom and fame. Why couldn't anyone understand? Is there no one else that felt the same? Would he ever realize his dream of being on Broadway? "If only, he thought, if only…”


Voldemort as it happened was just as bored as Harry Potter at that moment. The Death Eaters were having a board meeting in their London office and Voldemort couldn’t stand much more.

“So if you refer to the chart on page seven, you will see that terror has risen by 15% last month alone,” continued Wormtail to the approval of many nodding death eaters.

“We have a problem,” said Lucius entering the board room looking very flustered, “we need 500 I love Voldemort pins shipped to the Netherlands (the official country of the dark side) but the post office is closed for Sunday.”

“We can use FedEx (the official shipper of the dark side),” supplied Goyle, “not only will it get there on time but we’ll save hundreds!” 

"Brilliant!" cried many Death Eaters at this miraculous idea.

“Enough!” yelled Voldemort in a sudden burst of rage, “Out all of you!”

The surprised, sickly, super, shrimpy, sleepy, semi-automatic, shocked, and sousaphone-like Death Eaters cringed and scampered out of the room as fast as their legs could carry them in fear. Voldemort got up from the table and sighed. He crossed the room and peered out the window at the beautiful and happy gardens five thousand stories below him that surrounded the large skyscraper that was the headquarters of the EVIL Corporation (Every Villain Is Lemons). Voldemort started to day dream of random bursts of song and dance of Hairspray, 60’s ruffians, witches (the fake kind), the West Side, and other Broadway masterpieces and, of course, he dreamt of the wonderful moment when the whole audience would stand up and clap and cheer for him, the Dark Lord of the Dance. Voldemort laughed maniacally as he gazed at the tulips,  daisies, plastic flamingos, and giggling garden gnomes that were scattered throughout the gardens.


Author's Note: Please Review and tell me if I should continue this story because I have lots of others I could and should be doing... : )

Also obviously the song Harry and Hermione are singing is from the musical Grease which I in no possible way own the rights to. : /

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