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Throwing his paper work aside, sitting in his empty office was almost more tempting than going home. Empty as the flat was, it wasn’t home. The Malfoy Manor was certainly not a place he enjoyed to go home to when school was finished for the summer. It always brought those horrible memories. His mother- innocent and beautiful- had been a carefree woman once upon a time; before the Dark Lord, before Lucius. Draco had never really gotten to know his own family. They hadn’t paid any attention to him; his parents pretended he’d never existed.
The only attention he’d ever received from them was when he disappointed them, second best just wasn’t good enough. He couldn’t beat Potter at Quidditch; he couldn’t beat Granger with his grades. Nothing he had ever done in his entire life had been good enough. The beatings didn’t come until he’d started Hogwarts. He always knew his father was vicious and could care less about what happened to other people. He never showed any emotion towards anyone, not to the Dark Lord, not to the Death Eaters and certainly not to his own family. He didn’t know what he did wrong to displease his father so much, what made him hate him so much?
He’d believed his father when he was told of purebloods and mudbloods. He took the information greedily and used it against people to make them weak and it had worked. Granger was no exception. He didn’t realize until fifth year that everything his father had told him had been a lie. When his father was sent to Azkaban, he’d never felt more betrayed. He hadn’t gone to visit him, during that entire summer. He was ashamed that his father had become the man that everyone feared. Ashamed that he was his son, he was just like him in every aspect, and that had scared him.
He’d been granted permission within the Dark Lord’s rank during his sixth year; he didn’t want to accept this fate, this torture he would endure during his second to last year of schooling. But he knew deep down that if he refused, he’d be dead. He followed the Dark Lord’s orders, but in order to do that, he had to cut ties with everyone. Snape had tried to help him, but he didn’t need anyone. He knew what he was risking, everything and anything; his family, his life. He never had liked the Headmaster, with his stupid twinkle in his eye as if he knew everything, but he never known what had been planned for him.
That night in the Astronomy Tower, had been the third worst day of his life. His wand pointing towards the Headmaster, he’d already been injured. It should have been an easy task, he was right there in front of him. He had tried to ignore his words, that he was a good person, that Dumbledore would help him. But he knew he couldn’t do it, in Dumbledore’s moment of weakness, Draco Malfoy couldn’t kill him. It wasn’t because he was a coward, it was the shame. He wasn’t weak, he could kill but he just didn’t want to. It wasn’t his fight, he was doing someone else’s dirty work, and he didn’t like that. He knew he would feel disgusted with himself, he knew he would go to Azkaban; he knew he’d never see his family ever again. Without killing the Headmaster, it meant he’d done the right thing, whether he wanted to believe it or not.
Snape had rescued him, after his drop of his wand to the ground, killing the Headmaster and taking off. They hadn’t gone straight to the Dark Lord as promised; they waited around in Spinner’s End, laying low for awhile as everyone knew that final battle was approaching. When they finally arrived, the Dark Lord was furious. He hadn’t been able to kill the Headmaster, as request instead letting his professor do it for him. For that he was punished. His father was within the ranks of the Death Eaters, looking down upon him, disgusted. He showed no compassion, no emotion as his son was hit with the Cruciatus curse. He’d escaped Azkaban just like Sirius Black; the Death Eaters were taking over.
Draco didn’t want to be apart of this life, wanting to be a normal wizard boy. But he would never get his wish. He’d never had a childhood, ignored, and trapped with thoughts that weren’t his own. After his fierce beatings he received, he was too weak to speak, to stand. He was bleeding, the gashes and deep cuts on his skin, seemed to be getting worse. The Dark Lord looked ready to kill, pointing his wand towards Draco.
In that moment, it didn’t matter that he couldn’t kill his late Headmaster, it didn’t matter that his father hated him. Nothing mattered in that moment. Instead, the Dark Lord motioned for my father to step forward. He did as he was told, with a smirk on his face. Other Death Eaters had surrounded the room, that’s when Draco noticed a familiar presence in the room- his mother. She never attended the Death Eater meetings, and Draco was surprised to see her there. Nott’s father grabbed hold of Narcissa, roughly, pulling her towards Lucius as she began to struggle.
“Lucius, because of the insignificant crimes that your son has brought upon us, I believe his punishment is nearly finished, don’t you think?” The Dark Lord, asked.
“Of course,” Lucius said, “My Lord.”
“You’ve been requested to kill, and I want to see your son suffer.” The Dark Lord, hissed, his red eyes glowing.
Draco then became afraid; he knew something was going to happen. His father held his wand out, what he thought was pointed towards him, but changed directions. Before Draco realized what was happening, his mother was lying on the ground; pale, cold. She was dead. The green light hadn’t gone unnoticed. Some of the Death Eaters flinched at the sight, but didn’t say a word.
He didn’t cry, not one tear fell across his face. He wouldn’t let his emotions show; he couldn’t ever after tonight. His eyes boiled in anger at the one man who raised him. Did he not care? Did he not love his wife, his family? It was then that Draco realized no matter what had happened, he would not be apart of this. Even if it meant he would be crossing sides and taking part within the Order of the Phoenix.
Another meeting in the board- Potter and Weasley were present as usual. Mr. Tajo stood in front of them, telling them of their mission. Minus Granger; who had good reason not to participate.
“Now this is risking a lot coming from all of you, but this needs to be done. You will all leave within the next week. This might take up to two to three weeks, depending on what you can find out.”
“What happens if we do find Greyback?” Potter asked.
“You will not kill him; you are under strict orders to return back to the Ministry. I don’t want any funny business about this. I know you all don’t get along, but you will do as requested. Understood?”
Murmurs of yes’ were heard, before every one retreated out of the room. Draco realized he still had another case to work on, and set himself for another long day. Since his talk with Granger from last week, his life none the less was still the same. But he knew once this appointment with the doctor was over, his life would be forever changed. He couldn’t regret what happened that night, because he had no recollection of it. He was going to be a father. He was afraid to say the least; he didn’t know how to raise a child, and he also knew that Granger wouldn’t know either.
They were going to have to get along, and as much as he hated the idea, things would be interesting. He couldn’t figure out whether that was a good thing or not. One thing was for sure, he would not let his son or daughter become a neglected child like he was once was. He wouldn’t become his father. Picturing himself reading his child bedtime stories and sending him or her off to school for the first time was scary; holding a child, afraid of dropping it, taking care and loving the child. He never loved anyone, and as much as he wanted a happy ending, it wasn’t likely to happen.
He headed towards his office hearing the whispering in the halls as he passed by.
“Malfoy, as much as your information has helped us, why are you doing this? You hate us.”
“I have my reasons, Potter. They just don’t concern you.”
“It does when you show up here bloody and bruised. As much as I hate you, I don’t wish for you to get killed.”
“How sweet of you,” Draco said sickly.
“I’m not joking around anymore Malfoy, now tell me why you are helping us.” Potter said.
“He killed my mother.”
Potter had a shocked expression on his face for a mere second before it was replaced with curiosity. “Voldemort?”
“No, my father.”
“Oh,” Potter didn’t have anything else to say- there was nothing they could say.
“Well enough of this, I have to head back. If I find out any more information, I’ll let you know.”
“You should probably let Hermione clean you up first; you have some pretty nasty cuts.”
“As much as Granger is a great healer I think I’ll take my chances. Good day.”
A pop was heard, and 12 Grimauld Place was silent. All the other Order Members were asleep, ready for another’s day fight.
He woke up, sweat pouring down his face. He hated having these dreams over and over again. The nights filled with darkness, of war and rage. His father’s escape; his mother’s haunting words- she’d never said goodbye. His life was very different now, imagining himself years later after the war still living still surprised him. He thought he’d be killed for his involvement with the Dark Lord. He’d never received the Dark Mark but he still worked under the services of the Dark Lord. Learning everything he could about his attacks, the horcruxes. It hadn’t been an easy task, he was risking his life betraying him, and he feared his life. Luckily for him, Potter was able to defeat him after two years, after the strange attacks in Hogsmeade and Diagon Alley over the years.
The Order had lost a lot of people- Lupin, Mad-Eye, Shacklebot, many good men that had risked their own lives for the sake of others. His cousin Tonks was now raising Lupin’s son by herself. They had gotten married a few months prior, and Draco felt miserable as Tonks had to go on living her life without her husband. Draco never pictured himself as the married type, he thought he had his fair share of women in his Hogwarts days, but unlike now, he stayed single enjoying whatever free time he had left. His own child- he or she would be a Malfoy by default, and he didn’t want his child to think him a bad person.
He would be there for Granger whether or not she liked it or not. He was glad in some ways that Granger had told him of her pregnancy instead of having to find out for himself. He would have hated her and the child for lying and betraying him.
He headed towards the bathroom to freshen up, while getting ready for work. Granger’s appointment wasn’t till 3 o’clock that day, so he’d asked Mr. Tajo for time off. No doubt his boss would think something was up with two of his Aurors missing from work. He’d done his own research the night before when Granger had spoken to Mr. Tajo about the werewolf mission. He knew Granger wouldn’t have been able to come with an excuse; she wasn’t a very good liar. Luckily it wasn’t very hard to liable information when he found about Granger’s father. He had many resources.
Apparating to work; finishing last minute paperwork and continued his research on werewolf tactics for the mission had been a long process. He was relieved to be leaving the building, meeting Granger at the front gates. He awaited the truth.
Author’s Notes: This was merely an interlude, just a bunch of information on how Draco’s life came to be up until now. Hope you enjoyed it. Next chapter will be written shortly.
Thanks to my beta Sweet Decadence!
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