Chapter 15 :  Truths, of Sorts
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Truths, of Sorts
Blaise awoke to the warm glow of an evening sunset shining through the window of the room, intensified by his sleep filled eyes. He shut them firmly, the sight too much, then rubbed them and tried at opening again. A sleepy smile crossed his lips as the bright sun was much more bearable to look at now. He yawned, and arched his back slightly to stretch it, having a faint thought that this bed was far more comfortable than his. And since when did the Slytherin dorms get a lovely sunset shining through the window? Was this a dream?
A smile crossed his lips as he finally remembered, reality hitting him like a wave of warmth. He turned his head quickly and the smile grew when a head of family brown curls lay next to him, that untamable hair spread over her pillow in amazing fashion. She was sleeping sound on her side, the silky sheets showing off the amazing curve from her waist to her hips, hugging around her slender legs.
Blaise sat up and moved to holding himself over her, bringing a kiss to her bare shoulder while watching the side of her face. It stayed calm, asleep, and beautiful. He smiled slightly again; trailing light kisses over her shoulder to the strap of her delicate pink bra, which he remembered being pleasantly surprised when realizing it hardly matched with the blue cotton of her underwear. Slytherin girls bought matching undergarments, because they were always worried about looking good when practically naked. Always thinking about sex. It was obvious that Hermione didn't think this way, and Blaise loved that.
With his teeth he bit the strap and pulled it away from her skin slightly, letting it slip from his hold to snap lightly back onto her shoulder. He waiting for a moment, then smiled when she groaned slightly in a sleepy annoyance.
"Don't." she managed to get out though inaudible sounds, stretching her neck and attempting to bury her beautifully sleepy face in the pillow, even though she didn't turn her body at all. Blaise let a low chuckle out as he leaned down and pressed his lips to the side of her neck that had just been exposed to him. He felt her crane her neck even more, and he kissed her once more before she moved to lie slightly more on her back. He watch her carefully for a moment, her eyes twitching ever so slightly but never opening, then started a slow trail down her collarbone, her skin smooth as silk against is lips. He heard a content sigh escape her lips, making the permanent smile on his face grow a little more.
His lips meet the edge of the sheets, where they covered her form from his view, like those annoying school uniforms did, forcing him to use his imagination. Of course, he very much would rather the real thing. He smirked slightly, checking her to see her eyes still closed, then fisted a hand in the sheets and pulled them down delicately to just below her belly button, revealing more of her smooth collar, the dip between her breast, the slight outline of her rips through her skin, and the plain of her creamy, flat stomach. She breathed, making her chest move up slowly. He admired he peacefulness before brushing his lips against the skin just below her bra line, letting the memory of the hours ago when he had done the same thing to shiny skin as she had her hand tangled roughly in his hair, her stomach quivering from his touch in the most addictive way.
He felt her stomach move in and heard a gasp as she sat up quickly and pulled the sheets back up over her, a fury of embarrassment and shock showing on her face, much different then before, completely breaking Blaise from his trance. He frowned at her.
"Hermione." He wined slightly, giving a small tug at the sheets with the hand he still held them in, but she had a death grip on it, holding it to herself as if to protect herself from him, and when he tugged she simply shook her head, eyes wide open now. He felt slightly offended, and otherwise sad. Sad that she felt she had to hide from him, after everything.
"I've already seen everything." He commented, and she flushed, pulling the sheets closer.
"Yeah, but that was, before. Now it's different." She replied. Blaise frowned again.
"What's different?" He asked, moving to sit on his knees. She paused, looking away.
"I know you're looking now. " she said, timidly, and Blaise's let his eyebrows come together slightly, then let the face drift away as he held back a laugh.
"I was looking before. Weren't you?" He asked playfully, kissing the flush that burned again on her cheeks and wrapping an arm around he waist to pull her into laying down under him again. It was charming that he was making her uncomfortable; she could be so bi-polar sometimes. She strained a smile, ignoring his second inquiry.
"I'm conscious of it now though. It scares me." She replied, relaxing slightly back against her pillow, letting him kiss below her ear as she resting her hand on his neck, still holding the sheet with the other hand.
"Don't be scared of me Hermione. I would never hurt you." He whispered, feeling her shiver and hearing a shuttered breath leave her month.
"That's not it. You've just been with so much better. I don't even compare." Her voice was torn, showing a real emotion that Blaise couldn't believe was being felt by her. He pulled away suddenly, and she looked at him, a sadness finding her face.
"Don't say that." He scowled, and the sadness turned to confusion, her brown eye shining.
"You don't compare, because you are more beautiful then any of those girls. Those girls who jump into bed with any guy who asks, who would openly show anyone more parts of themselves than you're trying to hide right now. Girls who have no morals and no personality." Blaise watched her face fall slightly still, and he didn't know why. He put a hand on her cheek to bring her eyes back to his.
"I'm not lying Hermione. You're prefect, and smart, and amazing, and beautiful.' Blaise watched her smile small, eyes suddenly dripping, and he leaned forward to kiss the apples of her cheeks, the salt of her tears on his lips. And he knew what this was, like a warning in his gut, that made it tight and fluttery.
"I'm yours alone." He wanted to tell her so horribly about the dwelling feeling in his gut. Somehow put it to words. The flush, her smile, the way she looked at him like he was the only person in the world, how she holds his hand, and the way she kisses him like it's the last time every time. The way their bodies had fit together, and the look she had given him, fear, like fear of the unknown, but somehow determined. But how does he tell her without listing off everything.
"I love you." He whispered to her lips finally, like a kiss of a butterfly, or a fallen rose petal, and he watched a tear slide down her cheek before she joined their lips, like the three words had released her from shackles that had been holding her back.
"I love you too." She whispered in replt, kissing him again, her hands crawling around his shoulders. Blaise kissed her back, but numbly. It was the only way to coop with the pain that he had just felt. The guilt hitting him like being hit hard in the stomach with a sack of bricks, pain for what his first thought at been after those words had been uttered from her lips.
He had won the game.
Slytherin dorm parties consisted of drinking, dancing, and making out. Most won't bother going unless they are guaranteed to take part in all three of the activities. That is why Blaise usually strayed away from them. He was not a hell of a dancer, and it wasn't his thing to make out with someone in public.
Of course, a drink was defiantly what he needed at the moment, and that was his excuse for going when Draco had requested he'd be there. That and the fact that he was almost positive Hermione would be making an appearance with Ginny and Zacharias, but that was a secret.
They had managed to keep their affair up for the whole week, Draco not suspecting a thing because Blaise was no longer fighting for time with the girl. During classes that he didn't have with Draco, Blaise and Hermione would sneak off, have their time together, and then he would be back for the evenings to spend time in the Slytherin common room with his friends. His sessions with Draco had settled too, back to the way it used to be, happening only once in a while. In fact, they hadn't been together like before for the whole week.
It was convenient because it help Blaise keep his promise to Hermione. I am yours alone
Blaise downed the rest of his fire whiskey, feeling the burn of it as it flowed down his throat, hoping he wouldn't have to drink another glass to get the buzz he was desiring. It was the only way to tolerate Theodore's mindless babbling, which he had somehow got stuck listening to when Draco had been dragged off with Tracey to talk to some of her friends. He poured himself another glass of the amber liquid nonetheless, just in case the buzz didn't come.
"Look who just walked in." Theodore said, finally finding an interesting topic that Blaise managed to catch, even though he had been zoned out completely from Theodore's words. Blaise looked up to the door where the other boy was pointing. He saw Zacharias first, a blonde haired Hufflepuff, who could pass as Draco if he learned how to smirk and grew a few inches. Ginny was on his arm, her fiery hair long and pin straight, framing her face nicely, and she held a powerful stance even though she was getting glares from quite a few Slytherins.
And then the person that he was looking for.
Hermione wore a long sleeved, fitted sweater and a pair of dark jeans, clothing he had never seen her in considering the students rarely had a chance to ware anything other than their uniforms. Her hair was up in a loose bun, somehow more put together then when she usually put it up in the same way, and it showed off her perfectly slender neck and delicate jaw line. She looked beautiful, but Blaise couldn't help the thought of how much more beautiful she looked without clothes.
He smirked, the facial feature being passed off as a sneer in Theodore's eyes, and the boy shook his head slightly to go along with it.
"I mean, what is this school coming to when members of Gryffindor have the nerve to come into our common room." Theodore commented, and Blaise couldn't help but smirk again, remembering all to well how contradicting it would be if he agreed with the boy.
"Insanity." He said simply, slamming back the rest of his drink again. It didn't burn as much this time.
"I'm going to find Draco." He said after putting down his glass, then took off without another goodbye to Theodore. Of course, he wasn't off to find Draco.
Blaise watched Hermione carefully as she strayed away from Ginny and Zacharias, letting his lips curl slightly as she searched the room discreetly with her lovely brown eyes, and let himself enjoy the fact that he knew she was looking for him. She took residence near the edge of the fireplace, slightly more private considering most were choosing to keep away from the warmth for the fact that the room was already heavy with body heat. Blaise threaded easily through the crowd and managed to slink right up behind her without her realizing.
"Brave of you to wander away from your friends, especially in the snake den." He whispered to her, getting a whiff of her amazing scent. She didn't turn around, but he could sense her relaxing, and he smiled in reply to her trust in him.
"Us Gryffindors are known for our bravery." She replied, glancing over her shoulder. Blaise had to hold back from grabbing her, and forced himself to look at the people around them to remind him that he was not alone with her. But the buzz was hitting him hard, and he was finding himself not caring about their company as much as he should.
"And their stupidity." He added, another things Slytherins liked to know Gryffindors for, and when she finally turned and gave him an offended frown, he smiled.
"Don't worry, every cliché has exceptions. After all, you were smart enough to be with me." He smirked, and she let her brown eyes roll as her lips curled up ever so slightly.
"Tangling with you, a good idea? That could be debated." She commented, and Blaise let a chuckle roll in his throat, having it cut off when he felt her fingers lacing with his in the shadows between their bodies. He let his lip smile slightly, although strained because he was now using all might just to keep from pulling her upstairs with him.
She turned her eyes up, tilting her head slightly, away from wherever she had been looking before and setting her sight on Blaise's eyes, leaving him breathless for a moment. They were content for a moment, his thumb rubbing her palm as she squeezed her fingers together lightly. And then she filled the silence, no doubt seeing the strong urges that Blaise was having in his eyes and wishing to help him the slightest bit by distracting him.
"If I asked you to kiss me right now, would you?" She was not as good at distracting as Draco was. Blaise was snapped out of his haze of trying to keep off of her, and pulled right into thinking about how amazing it was to kiss her, and longing to do so now that she had mentioned it.
He thought for a moment, flicking his eyes to the people, who seemed to not even realizing that it was he, Blaise Zabini who was talking to Hermione, then brought his eyes back to her.
"Yes." He whispered, and she smiled, then turned her eyes away to look somewhere behind him.
"Even though he's watching?" She asked again, and Blaise frowned in reply before glancing over his shoulder, being hit with a silver gaze that almost knocked him windless. Draco was watching with a look of pure betrayal written on his features, and Blaise felt lack of air making it to his lungs, as if someone had stabbed him in the throat. He let his eyes widen slightly, scolding himself for being so foolish, for acting so irrationally just to see her, and turned back to her.
"Are you asking for me too." He asked, and she smiled, slightly strained.
"We've gone so far to keep it from him. I wouldn't put you in that position."
"But I would easily put myself in that position if I knew it was what you wanted." He stated, and she sighed, although her eyes shone with a hidden pleasure.
"I don't want you to. I want you to go talk to him, and cover for us." She said, squeezing his fingers with hers in assurance, then let her fingers fall away and turned to walk back to Ginny and Zacharias, who were dwelling in the corner of the room with Cho and her friend. Blaise watched her go, letting his eyes blink and noticing when they took longer than they should have to open, feeling the dizzy of the alcohol settling finally in his blood. After seeing a relatively satisfying amount of the girl (considering Blaise could never be completely satisfied because he would need to view her for the rest of his life to be so), Blaise sighed and turned, walking back towards the drinks, where he knew Draco still was.
Nothing was said for a long while as he leaned against the wall, hands in his pockets, avoiding Draco's eyes. Draco spoke first.
"What are you playing at?" Blaise finally turned to look at him, noticing the small frown line in-between Draco's eyebrows, and knowing he was quite concerned only for the fact that it had made an appearance. That line only showed up when he was seriously confused.
"Playing at?" Blaise asked, trying to act innocent.
"You quit. If the game is over, why are you over there being cozy with her?" Draco replied, quietly to keep the conversation from being heard by eavesdroppers. Blaise let a smile fall over his face, even though he felt dread in the pit of his stomach.
"I was just messing with her Draco. Relax." He said, raising an eyebrow in expectance to Draco's reaction, hoping he bought it. Draco looked at him carefully for a moment.
"Are you drunk?" he asked finally. Blaise almost laughed but held back. Of course, that would be a good reason for his actions.
"Maybe." He said simply. Was he buzzed enough to pass as drunk? No. He'd have to say something he'd only say if intoxicated.
"Are you jealous?" Blaise asked immediately, turning his head to look at Draco, who froze at the question. Blaise let the corner of his lip curl upward slightly, holding back another laugh at the reaction he had gotten. He was getting too much joy out of this. Who would have thought that acting drunk would make him feel so drunk?
Maybe he was a little drunker then he thought.
Draco had caught the smirk, and Blaise watched him narrow his eyes slightly before pushing off the wall.
"I'll show you jealousy." He replied shortly while walking away. Blaise frowned, confused, but barely had a second thought about it, and let his eyes roll slightly. He was just glad that he was off the hook.
Blaise watched Draco walk, hands in his pockets as he moved determinately back to Tracey's side, who accepted his arms around her immediately, even though she was mid-conversation with some fellow Slytherin girls. Draco lingered for a moment, obviously to be polite and wait for Tracey to stop talking, before he leaned into her and whispered something to her ear, kissing her jaw and taking hold of her hand, leading her after him as he moved for the dorms.
Blaise felt a heat crawl up his collar, and he swallowed hard, turning away from the couple and finding his hands balled into fists. He tried to breath, but he felt it caught in his throat at his rage. Rage induced by liquor.
Before he knew it he was banging on Draco's door. He paced once in front of it to try and calm himself, but didn't have the time to do so anymore, because Draco had opened to door mere seconds after he had knocked. Blaise noticed that Draco hadn't even waited for Tracey to fix herself, and she was sitting on his bed, half way through untangling her hair when the door had swung open. Draco had his shirt open, and Blaise found it very hard not to notice.
Draco and Blaise locked eyes for a moment, and Draco spoke.
"Tracey, get out." he said, never taking is silver gaze away from Blaise's. From beyond the stare Blaise could see a shocked face fall over Tracey.
"What?" She asked, befuddled, and the blonde growled in frustration as he let go of the door and returned to her, grabbing the elbow of the girl and pulling her towards the door. Blaise slinked in while Draco was dragging her, Tracey far too shocked to fight back until she was in the hall.
"Draco!" she protested, to very little prevail, because she was not being heard. Finally, when he was ready to slam the door on her, she spoke something that Draco could not ignore.
"If you do this, we're through." She said to him, roughly, holding her ground like the strong woman she was. Tracey should have known that Draco didn't like that type of woman though. He paused his motion to close the door and looked at her, and for a moment she had thought she had won, but then he let the door close on her shocked face.
There was a lull, but it was only short enough for one breath before Blaise jumped right in to take Tracey's spot apposing Draco.
"How dare you." He hissed, and Draco snapped his eyes back to him, fury hidden in them.
"How dare I? How dare you? Have you been lying this whole time? Were we still playing even after you quit?" Draco's gaze was hauntingly steady and so sharp it stung Blaise like thousands of little needles. He drew back slightly.
"No." Blaise replied, even though he wasn't sure what he was denying.
"Then what was that? Playing comfy with her in the open like that. Why risk it when she was just a part of the game? A game that was already finished. The school will be talking by tomorrow." Draco shot, voice tainted with hidden hate.
"And like that's any better then what you just did. Dangling Tracey in front of me to get me up here. Tracey is not stupid Draco. She'll tell her story and people will talk about us." Blaise shot right back, noting a flicker in Draco eyes. The dark haired Slytherin stared at his company, until the blonde let a smirk cross his features.
"Why did you come up anyway Blaise? Why didn't you stay down there with Mud-blood?" Draco asked, the word slipping off his lips like silk, simple like a pleasant greeting. It infuriated Blaise, and he hated himself for knowing who Draco was referring to. If he could have only been in Gryffindor, to never meet Draco and be able to openly love Hermione.
Then again, who would he have been without Draco?
"Don't call her that." Blaise growled in reply, getting a glare from the blonde.
"What is she you to then, Blaise? If not a mud-blood? Some sort of play thing? I guess I could understand considering the things I did with her, but I thought you'd be able to give it up just as easily as I did. Or were you just not satisfied enough fucking around with me?" Blaise backed against the door as Draco advanced a few steps, having his heart suddenly racing in fear, for he had never seen Draco mad at him like this. He wasn't even yelling. He was calm, and level as ever, but his eyes rolled in threatening loathe like a thunderstorm rolled across the sky.
"I-." The blonde closed the gap quicker than Blaise could blink.
"And don't you dare say you love her." Draco whispered in a hiss through his teeth, which Blaise noticed were clenched tightly together. Blaise shuddered out a breath before speaking, the alcohol causing his mind to function a lot slower than it should in such situation. And he couldn't get rid of the urge that it brought to bridge the small gap between his lips and Draco's.
But was that even the alcohol, or just instinct?
"And what if I do love her?" he replied finally, steadier than expected. He thanked Merlin for the experience in lying that he had obtained over the last few weeks.
"If you do then tell me this." Draco said, suddenly careful with his words. Blaise felt them, Draco's lips so close, and smelt the reminisce of firewhiskey, wondering if it was from his breath or Draco's. He caught those silver eyes flick downward to his lips, and he felt his stomach knot, knowing what was coming.
"Why won't you stop me when I do this?" Draco moved his face even closer with the words, noses touching, his lips brushing against Blaise's with each syllable, causing Blaise to shut his eyes before it even came. Then a kiss, unlike anything of Draco's. It was soft, tender, completely different from emotions that had shone in his eyes mere seconds before. Blaise had a brief wonder of it was possible that Draco learned what a real kiss was like from Hermione, but how was that, if she didn't feel real emotion for him.
It ended, and there was yet another lull in the happenings, a lull that seemed to last forever, a forever that was filled with so many thoughts flying through Blaise's head that he was starting to get a headache. He found himself leaning forward onto the blonde's lips again in hopes to get rid of the thoughts. His hand found familiar blonde hair as Draco's slender fingers fisted around the fabric of his shirt at his waist.
Soon enough Blaise was pushed further into the door by the blonde, roughly, tasting the firewhiskey on Draco tongue, and letting it make him drunker, forgetting the world and the argument of moments ago, even though words repeated themselves in his head. I'm yours alone.
The heat broke for a moment when Draco pulled away to glance down through heavy lidded eyes, to where his fingers fumbled with Blaise's belt, the dark haired boy too stunned that he wasn't doing anything to stop it. Finally he reacted.
"Why are you doing this?" He found himself asking through a shudder when Draco dragged nails from his navel down to the line of his trousers. Another kiss and Draco's straight teeth tugging on Blaise's lip before he answered.
"You were mine first."
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