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Torn In Two by Nessa Elendil
Chapter 7 : Impossible to Heal
Rating: 15+Chapter Reviews: 1

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A/N: I know, I know, I'm horrible at updating! If you've been waiting a while for this chapter, please tell me you weren't terribly disappionted in it, I feel bad enough about not getting up for so long already.

It had been two weeks, two weeks, since Lily's mother had been murdered. And things were only getting worse for the Evans family.

It was amazing what could happen over such a short period of time. Petunia, more rebellious than ever, had begun to blame Lily for the death of their mother. She screamed how if Lily had never gone to that "freak" school, the "freaks" from her "freak" world never would have come after them. When Lily said, through teary eyes, that they had no way of knowing that, Petunia countered by saying since Lily was a "freak" she should have been able to stop them. Lily knew she would have been no match for the Death Eaters who came after them, but she couldn't help but feel that if she had only remembered her wand her mother would still be alive.

Nothing had helped matters when, a week ago, none other than Jeff Potter showed up to tell to the mourning familythat the identity of the Death Eaters involved with Elizabeth's death was still unknown, and he had brought James with him.

Lily had stayed in the living room the entire time, and when James came to talk to her, she had slapped him across the face before he could even open his mouth.

In truth she didn't know why, but Lily blamed James for what happened. He cornered her while she was vulnerable, he messed up andinterfered with her thought process, he made her think about something other than safety, he made her forget her wand. That, combined with her sister's words of how she should have saved their mother, had her convinced. And she had never hated James Potter more than she did at that moment.

The state of her life at that time didn't help either. Lily wasn't a materialistic person, but seeing Petunia arrange to sell their mother's car and hearing her father worry over keeping the house made her worry over things like clothes, food, and things.

Mr. Evans had never been one to drink, but since the death of his wife, it seemed to be all he ever did. He loved his daughters, but the stress and pressure was too much for him to handle. He had lost his job because of it, having screamed how he wasn't planning to stop and time soon as he took a poorly aimed swing at his boss. He was lucky they didn't do more than fire him, but had to find another one that didn't pay nearly as much. Petunia refused to get a job, even though money was tight because the family's sole source of income was barely above minimum wage. Lily had had a few babysitting jobs in the neighborhood, being fifteen there was hardly anything else she could do, and while she was hoping that the parents of the children she watched would start going out more, but they all seemed to find a new babysitter, thinking that Lily needed to spend time with her family now.

But, in all honesty, she could use a break; Petunia wouldn't even look at her if she could help it, and her father had changed beyond recognition. It was only two weeks, but it felt like forever; it all had happened so fast.It felt like having a mother and a normal like was a distant memory, almost forgotten. Now, Lily just wanted to forget this life.

Lily was laying on her bed, looking at a picture of her family. They were so happy, she just wanted to fall in the picture with them. A knock on the door and a scream directed at her brought her out of her thoughts.

"Get the door, freak!"

The red-eyed redhead wiped her eyes and headed to the door. The person standing behind it was the last person Lily expected to see until going back to Hogwarts.

"Hey," she said.

"Hey," Lily replied, letting her friend of almost five years in. Why Lily was friends with Jasmine Black was as much a mystery to her as her mutual friendship with Severus Snape was to the rest of the school. That was probably more because Jasmine was best friends with James Potter and his gaggle of idiots, in fact she was one. Lily didn't blame her, she imagined that being cousins with Potter's even-more-of-a-moron-than-Potter best mate would do something to a person. Even though Lily didn't find her to be an idiot per se, unless she chose to act like it, it still bugged her that Jasmine would assist them in all their stupid pranks, including the ones pulled on her Slytherin friend. But she found Jasmine to bea reliable friend, to her and the Potter gang. Lily supposed the only reason they became friends though was that Potter was a friend of Jasmine's, and Potter had an obsession with Lily, and Jasmine didn't talk to her about why she should date Potter, and it irritated Potter that one of his best friends was also one of Lily's, but Lily still loathed him.

...Did Potter really affect her life so much: her friend, her family, her life? No, he couldn't... but that left the only other option being that she was determined to think about him. And that really was absurd!

"I heard what happened,"Jasmine said gently.

Of course she would have, Lily realized as she remember it would have beenJasmine's room she had gotten the pajamas and clothes from during hernight at the Potter Mansion, and Jeff was in charge of solving her mother's murder. And James was there.

Lily didn't know what to say, and so she just nodded her head. She was taken by complete surprise when her friend then threw her arms around her and engulfed her in a tight hug. The emerald eyed witch didn't even know how much she needed that hug until it happened, and she rested her head on the other girl's shoulder, clutching her tightly, trying not to cry.

"I'm so sorry." The dark haired witch sounded close to tears herself, which shocked Lily most of all. She had known her friend for years, and Jasmine Black was not one to even come close to letting her emotions escape her control.

"It wasn't your fault," Lily murmured, feeling like she was stating the obvious.

"It was in part," she said, barely above a whisper. Jasmine pulled back, preparing to explain her words. They came out so soft, though her second sentence was filled with disgust. "They person, or Death Eater rather, who organized it, was Bellatrix Lestrange. She was just planning to ambush Muggles for fun. I- I should have known she was planning something, tried to stop it. Anything!"

"What could you have done?" Lily asked, figuring to keep her mouth shut about her own guilt unless she wanted to face the same question. But she did truly wonder what Jasmine thought she could have done. Lily had heard the name Bellatrix Lestrange thrown around before, and it was usually attached to somethingor things the Death Eaterhad personally done which were some of the most disgusting, horrific acts of magic ever thought of, let alone preformed, which of course Lestrange had preformed.

"Lily, you don't understand." Now she sounded ashamed. "Bellatrix Lestrange is my sister. We were probably in the same house when she was planning it. She and Rodolphus still go there sometimes. I should have done something!"

Lily didn't quite know how to digest this information: The sister of the person who killed her mother, who was also a known Death Eater, was not only one of her best friends, but standing right in front of her.

"And I thought I had it bad with Petunia," she eventually decided upon saying. She couldn't blame her friend for her sister's action, she would never want to be blamed for Petunia's.

Jasmine gave a small smile and hugged her again. Lily realized they both needed that hug this time, and now she was feeling that maybe, just maybe, it was a little less impossible to heal her wounds. Lily was grateful for a friend like Jasmine, even if her sister had murdered her mother, because Jasmine understood, about things like Potter too; and now Lily understood why. She had never pictured her friend's home life as good as her own had been, even with Petunia, but she had also never suspected it could possibly be worse than her's at the present time. No wonder she could sleep after some of the things she and Potter and their friends did; compared to what some of her family had done, it was nothing.

James Potter really wasn't that much of a jerk... He had never tried to kill anyone at the least.

What was she on about?! Potter, Potter! Of course he was a jerk! And a toe-rag. And a bully. And conceited. And kind, considerate, handsome- NO! Lily knew he was a jerk, a jerk she hated. And a reason her mother was dead.

A/N: You guys do understand who the OC is? I'm also horrible at explaining myself at times. ...I should really work on that.

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