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Chapter 24 : Whispers Of October
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If you don't read The Life Dissertation of Lovette Luclare beforehand, you'll be as confused as I am about why my mom thinks I don’t study. I don’t get A’s by sitting on my ass!
We’re getting down to the wire. Obviously. I think there’s about two chappies left? Yeah, counting the epilogue there’s about 2 left. I’M SO FREAKIN EXCITED!!!
“Lovette.” Hestia inclined her head towards Lovette, greeting her friend, “Happy Halloween by the way.” She added, grinning. Lovette did not return the gesture.
“Are you alright?” Hestia inquired, closing the front door to her apartment. It was rare that anyone visited Hestia’s flat, but today was different. In more than one way.
“Fine...fine...” Lovette was wringing her hands as she escorted herself to the kitchen. But Hestia knew Lovette was lying; she looked far from “fine”.
“Okay...” Hestia said skeptically under her breath, following Lovette. She found her friend already seated at the small table. Lovette seemed nervous, her tapping fingers nails on the wooden surface were not the only thing to give it away though. She looked almost disheveled, the look of a person who had just woken up and really taken no care in what they looked like before going out.
“Lovette, are you sure everything is alright?” Hestia asked tentatively, taking a seat across from Lovette. However, Hestia’s features immediately hardened, “Sirius didn’t leave again, did he?”
Lovette looked up at Hestia and seemed to force a chuckle, holding her forehead in one hand.
“No...he didn’t leave me.”
“Then, Lovette...what is-?”
“Its everything!” Hestia was quite taken aback by Lovette’s hysterical outburst. Lovette then stood up and began to pace across the kitchen.
“Everything lately has been...crazy. I mean, Peter’s never around anymore, Voldemort’s getting stronger, Lily and James can‘t even leave their house! Not to mention I want to get married...finally. I don’t know...everything seems like a huge mess and I don’t know what to do!” Lovette said, her voice cracking, “And I’m just having these visions that make no sense!” She yelled, but as soon as Lovette shouted this, her eyes went wide. Much like a person who had just let out a huge secret...
“What did you just say?” Hestia asked quietly, standing up from her seat to meet Lovette. Lovette’s brown eyes shifted back and forth as she tried to think of an excuse, but Hestia was quicker.
“Lovette...are you a Seer?” Hestia asked, her mouth slightly ajar with her brows furrowed together. Lovette ventured a look at her friend, but then immediately turned her gaze to the floor.
“Not exactly...” Lovette could almost see Hestia standing in front of her with her hands on her hips. Just like Lovette’s mother used to do when Lovette was in trouble or had been caught lying.
“Would you care to explain?” Hestia inquired in a tone suggesting that Lovette was going to give Hestia her answers whether Lovette wanted to or not.
“Yes...” Lovette mumbled, defeated as she took her seat again. Hestia nodded approvingly, but still in a stiff manner. She then mimicked Lovette and reclaimed her place.
Lovette began to fiddle with her fingers that were clasped together. Another nervous habit. Hestia pursed her lips, waiting for Lovette to begin.
“I don’t know whether I’m a Seer or not. I get these...daydreams...about the past and future. But I don’t know if they’re true. None of them have ever happened to me other than when I was having the...dream.”
“Why do you refer to them as ‘dreams’?” Hestia asked in a very professional tone. Lovette shrugged.
“When they started...I only ever had them at night when I was asleep. I just thought they were really vivid dreams or nightmares. I mean, that’s what St. Mungo’s diagnosed it as-”
“You weren’t in that hospital because of a high stress level.” Hestia stated more than solicited. Yet again, Lovette shrugged.
“I don’t know that either. I was only ever having my...dreams...at night.”
“Do you have them during the day now?” Lovette sighed, resting her head on her hand. She then nodded.
“Is that why you always ‘fall asleep’ at the most random times?” Hestia inquired, referring to the many times when Lovette would just fall into a trance-like state and then wake up seconds later, claiming that she had ‘zoned out’ or ‘dozed off’. Lovette nodded again.
Hestia began to tap her fingernails on the table, illustrating that she was in deep thought. Lovette gave her time to ponder.
“Does anyone know about this?” Hestia finally requested. Lovette shook her head, biting her lip.
“No. But, its not like I’m having visions...I mean, they’re not coming true or anything.” Lovette countered, trying to find a flaw in the theory. It wasn’t working.
“Maybe you’re seeing a lot further into the future than you think.” Hestia said, sighing. Lovette groaned, knowing that this were probably true. Her constant visions of Harry were years into the future! But Lovette wasn’t about to admit to seeing Harry’s life years in the making.
“Maybe.” Lovette concurred, shrugging. Hestia smiled, lightening the mood.
“Come on! Its Halloween! Be happy, its our holiday!” Hestia said, whipping out her wand and flicking it so a tray of orange and black iced cookies appeared on the table in front of them. Lovette raised an eyebrow.
“And who did you steal these from?” Lovette asked, taking one and laughing; Hestia couldn’t cook so she summoned food from her friends. Lovette often found that her morning coffee disappeared when she went to find sugar. The culprit had always been Hestia.
Hestia grinned, taking one herself.
“Lily.” She said airily. Lovette stopped in mid-bite.
“Oooh, she’s gonna kill you!”
“I’ll survive.” Hestia said, winking.
Lovette found herself, at eleven o’clock at night, still with Hestia. The two had taken refuge in the living room, their various trays of cookies set on the coffee table. Lovette found it fun, having one-on-one girl time with Hestia. It had been a long time since Lovette had been so carefree.
“We should totally do this more often!” Lovette exclaimed, stealing yet another cookie. Hestia giggled, her mouth full of the treat, but still managed to say,
“Yeah! Next time, we have to invite Lily.”
“And she can bring more cookies. Otherwise we’ll have to steal them and feel her wrath later.” Lovette said, tittering like a teenage girl too. Hestia fought back a snort of laughter.
“This is really awesome.” Hestia said seriously, after a few more moments of giggles and baked goods. Lovette nodded, smiling.
“It makes me feel...happy. I mean, like I did at Hogwarts. Young, happy-go-lucky. All we need now is Lily and...” Lovette trialed off, looking down at the floor.
“And Brenna.” Hestia finished, nodding, “But, we’ll have to deal anyway. She wouldn’t want us being all bitter. She would have wanted us like this. Immature.” Lovette laughed out loud at this, smiling in agreement.
“Do you think I’ll ever find someone?” Hestia asked abruptly. The cookie, that had been half-way to Lovette’s mouth, stopped in mid-air. Lovette looked over at her friend, searching for the humor. But there was none. Hestia was unsmiling.
Lovette placed the cookie back on the plate, putting on a small smile.
“Of course you’ll find someone!” She exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air for extra zest. Hestia did not react.
“Like someone that really loves me.” Lovette furrowed her brows at this.
“Why would you be with someone if you didn’t love them?” She asked, Hestia shrugged.
“To feel loved.” Lovette blinked.
“Don’t tell me you’re going to be a whore now-”
“Lovette! Really...I just feel, left out. Everyone has someone.”
Lovette did not know how to argue this, but tried her best.
“Remus is alone.” She said frankly. Hestia shook her head.
“But he had someone that he loved. That loved him in return.”
“Brenna’s gone,” Lovette said quietly, “He won’t get her back. But at least you have an open-mind to love. You have a chance.” Hestia cocked her head to the side.
“You don’t think Remus will love again?”
Shifting uncomfortably, Lovette shrugged.
“I don’t think he’ll find another girl that he cares about the way he cared about Brenna. If it was me...I don’t think I could love again. I’m so used to Sirius and the way he feels about me, anything other than that would feel awkward. Remus loved Brenna like Sirius loves me. I don’t think Remus will find another girl.” She finished bitterly. Hestia shook her head.
“You have a strange outlook on life. I think Remus will find someone else.” Hestia stated. Lovette gave a thoughtful nod.
“God bless him and his mindset if he does. But if it was me...I couldn’t do it. You know how I am. I have a routine. I don’t like change. The things I feel now...”
Lovette glanced out of the window at the October night. She was originally going to finish her sentence with “are what I’m used to” but that didn’t seem to fit. She felt strange about saying at. Especially because she wasn’t sure if that’s what she was feeling. And an almost impending doom seemed to knot itself in her stomach. Lovette knew things didn’t feel right.
She furrowed her brows, concentrating back on Hestia. Hestia was giving her a concerned look.
“Are you alright?” Hestia asked quietly. Lovette shook her head.
“No...I think I’m just going to head home if that’s alright?” She asked. Hestia nodded, offering a half-hearted smile.
“I’ll see you later.” She said as Lovette made her way to the door. Lovett turned and nodded slowly.
Sirius was not home when Lovette arrived back at her flat after visiting Hestia. Although this normally would not have disconcerted Lovette, it did not help her paranoia.
Something bad was about to happen.
She felt it.
She knew it.
Lovette threw her house keys on the coffee table, sighing as she rubbed her eyes underneath her glasses. She was getting a headache. How much worse could she possible feel tonight?
“Where are you Sirius?” Lovette asked, throwing her hands up as she reached her bedroom, “I need a hug...” She mumbled, carelessly dropping her coat on the floor.
Standing before her bed, Lovette rolled her eyes. It was a mess, just as she had left it this morning. Her clothes were simultaneously strewn across it, not to mention the Daily Prophet and the letter from Hestia inviting her over for lunch. Lovette smiled wistfully, chuckling. Sirius had still been asleep when she had thrown all of this stuff on their bed. Obviously he had made no effort to throw the things onto the floor. It made no difference to him.
Yawning, Lovette pushed all of the clutter off of the bed. She’d clean it up...later maybe? It didn’t really matter now.
Lovette glanced at the clock, eleven thirty at night. Why was Sirius out this late? Maybe an Order mission, Lovette guessed. She had not recalled him telling her about any mission. Though, it was possible that he had informed her of it and she just hadn’t paid attention.
It’s a holiday.
Aren’t people not supposed to work on holidays?
A small grin spread across Lovette’s face at the thought of Halloween. It was always one of her favorite events. Well, at Hogwarts it had been. She had always looked forward to the Halloween feast at school. Plus, every year Brenna had ran around the school with half orange and half black hair, screaming “HAPPY HALLOWEEN!” and pretending to cackle like a Muggle’s idea of a witch. It had always been entertaining.
Covering her face with her hands, blocking out the ceiling, Lovette chuckled. It was not a jovial chuckle though; it was more of a laughter of someone pitying themselves.
“Sirius...” Lovette whined, her face still obscured. She felt she needed Sirius with her now more than ever. For what reason, she was unsure of.
“I need you love.
Now more than ever.
Just be here,
Lie next to me
So I can hear your even,
“Speak to me love.
Caress my mind with your
Words that slip
Past your tongue.
Tell me everything is alright
I might begin to
“Love me love.
Make me feel wanted,
Make me believe that life
Is worth living.
That I wake up every morning
For a purpose.
“Do you know what that purpose is love?
“To see your smiling face...”
Lovette’s poetry grew fainter and fainter as she began to slip into a light slumber. Her voice became weaker as her mind began to fade into unconsciousness. The feeling in her limbs started to ease as the lids glided over her eyes. She could feel sleep just within her grasp.
The slam of a door immediately brought Lovette back into reality. It was the front door, she was sure. She could hear fast-paced steps making their way to her bedroom. Was it Sirius? Surely he would have announced his presence...unless he was trying to surprise Lovette...
Lovette’s chest tightened. Maybe it wasn’t Sirius. Could a Death Eater had really broken into her house? If they had...would they have slammed the door shut?
Well, they aren’t really known for their stealth...
Lovette shook the sarcastic thought from her head. It wasn’t the time to be a cynic. Someone had possibly broken into her apartment!
“LOVETTE!” Lovette cringed at the sudden yell of her name. She knew this frantic voice. But what was he doing in her house?
“Lovette!” He called again, he was getting closer to the bedroom.
“Remus?” Lovette asked tentatively, crawling off of her bed. She made her way to the closed door to the hall, carefully pulling open the knob.
Remus was surely standing on the other side of the door. Lovette gasped at his state. He was clearly as frantic as his voice had sounded. Anxiety flooded Lovette. Something was definitely wrong.
“Remus?-” She began, but was cut off.
“You need to get to Godric’s Hollow now.” Remus said firmly, taking both of Lovette’s hands in his own. Lovette furrowed her brows.
“What? Why? Remus, what the hell is going on?-”
“There’s no time to explain! Lovette, please.”
Lovette stood for a moment, gazing at her friend. Maybe his eyes held the answer?
“Lovette, there’s no time. I have to go. You have to go. I’ll meet you there.”
Remus began to walk away towards the front door, leaving Lovette standing in the doorway to her bedroom. Collecting her thoughts, she ran after him.
“Remus! What’s wrong? What about Sirius? Is he alright?!” But before Lovette could reach him he had slammed the front door shut, the telltale ‘pop!’ of his Disapparition. sounding from the other side of the door.
Uselessly, Lovette pounded her fist on the door out of frustration. What was going on? She groaned, her back to the door as she slid down to the floor.
Lovette held her head in her hands. This was the exact thing she had been expecting to happen. Something bad. But still she felt useless. Tears threatened to spill over her eyelids.
“This can’t be happening...”
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