Chapter 30 : Out of the Abyss
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Chapter 30: Out of the Abyss
“Oh…he’s beautiful…” Carisma breathed as baby Harry wrapped his tiny hand around Carisma’s index finger.
“I think I’ve fallen in love with him…” I held the gurgling baby close to me.
“Oy! I’m right here! I can hear you!” Sirius yelled from the living room.
“Well, he IS much better looking than you…” I teased, giving Harry a kiss on top of his head.
“Alright, let’s not get carried away,” Sirius tossed the Daily Prophet on the coffee table and strolled towards us.
“Come on, Harry,” He held out his hands, “You don’t want to be with your stinky godmothers, do you? You want to be with your insanely brilliant and ATTRACTIVE godfather, don’t you now?”
Carisma and I both threw him looks but then burst in to laughter as Harry spit up on him.
“James! Your son threw up on me,” Sirius whined.
I threw him a dishtowel, “Clean it up before it sets,” I shifted Harry to my left hip and whispered, “Nicely done…” Harry burbled gleefully as I tickled him.
Carisma giggled, “That’s right, your godfather deserved it for being such a chauvinistic and pompous a—“
“Carisma!” I gasped, covering Harry’s ears.
“What? Come on, he’s 6 months old, he won’t understand!” She crossed her arms.
“Doesn’t mean Lily won’t kill you,” I jerked my head towards the kitchen before handing Harry over to Carisma.
“How’s it going in there?” I popped my head in to bathroom. Sirius had a deep frown on his face and was still desperately trying to remove the stain from his shirt.
“It’s…not…coming…off,” He growled under his breath.
“Come here…” I shook my head, unbuttoning his shirt.
“Jen, I know that you fancy me and all but here? Really? With a 6-month-old outside? The nerve!” He mock-gasped.
“Oh funny,” I rolled my eyes, “Scourgify,” A small soapy patch covered the stain. Running the shirt under water, I looked up at Sirius, who was staring intently at me.
“Nothing…” He replied softly. I gazed tenderly at the strikingly gorgeous man that stood before me; his supercilious and aristocratic features had softened as he returned my gaze.
There was a loud bang on the door and James’ muffled voice could be heard, “I don’t know what the two of you are doing in there and don’t intend to find out but dinner’s ready!”
“Come on; I guess we’ve been caught…” I chuckled.
“Yeah, doing the damn laundry,” He muttered before leading me outside.
In a few minutes, everyone had taken their seats at the dining table and was now enjoying Lily’s delicious homemade dishes. Harry, who was seated next to James, was now making a fuss in his high chair. I watched him lovingly, he was so adorable and James and Lily were both smitten with him.
Sirius sat on the other side of Harry and was now making funny faces at him while James tried to feed him. That was when I noticed something strange with Carisma and Remus, who were sitting across from each other, their eyes refusing to meet each others as they ate in silence.
After dinner, I pulled Carisma to a corner and questioned, “What’s wrong? You and Remus don’t seem to be talking much,” I noted.
Carisma sighed, rubbing her eyes stressfully, “We’ve been having a lot of fights…” She ran her fingers through her hair, “Pretty nasty ones too…”
“If you don’t mind me asking, what are you fighting about exactly? We couldn’t separate the both of you when we were still at Hogwarts…what on earth could have happened?” I placed a concerned hand on Carisma’s arm.
She heaved a huge sigh, “Everything,”
“Everything?” I repeated, dumbfounded, “It couldn’t possibly be everything,”
“No…really, I know it sounds ridiculous and I sound as if I’m exaggerating but honestly, we’re fighting about every single little thing, it’s driving me mad and…” She stopped and exhaled tensely, “He’s starting to make me think that he’s doing this on purpose to push me away…”
“That’s rubbish, Remus would never do such a thing!” I exclaimed in horror.
“I know,” She replied quietly, dropping in to an armchair, “But you should hear the things that we fight about, it’s ridiculous!” She squeaked incredulously, “Furniture, magical politics, the—the color of his shirt! I mean who the hell fights about that?”
“Well, the both of you should try to talk about it…I mean, it’s loads better than sniping at each other every second isn’t it?”
“I guess…I just…” Carisma hesitated before murmuring, “I sometimes think we might not be right for each other, after all…”
I gasped aloud, “You can’t say that, Carisma!”
“Why the hell not?” She grumbled crossly. I nearly laughed at her childish expression.
“Honestly, I mean we’re not going to last, that’s pretty clear…might as well do it now.” She stood up indignantly.
Shit, what did I do?
“What? How did our conversation progress to this? No, no, I said work it out,” I enunciated slowly, my eyes wide.
“You know what, let’s not talk about it now,” Carisma pleaded tersely, “Let’s play with Harry,”
“Fine,” I smiled encouragingly and followed her in to the living room.
Grabbing Jen by the wrist, I pulled her in to my lap as Carisma walked over to Harry’s cot to retrieve him. Wrapping my arms around her waist, I watched James helping Lily in the kitchen, the both of them exchanging affectionate looks once in a while.
As Carisma settled on the sofa next to Remus, she bounced Harry on her laps as he squealed delightfully. Watching Remus carefully, I noticed his distant and frigid attitude towards Carisma. Something must have been happened between the two. Making a mental note to annoy Remus later, I watched Jen with a smile on my face as she gazed at Harry adoringly.
“You know,” I murmured near her ear, “I want one too…”
“Do you?” She whipped around, flabbergasted.
“What? Why are you always so shocked?” I asked blankly.
“Well, I’ve never really pegged you for the type of man who would settle down, get married and have children,” Jen said thoughtfully.
Oh, I’m insulted.
“In case you haven’t noticed, I’ve done two of the three things from that list…” I smirked triumphantly.
“Right, so you really want babies who are going to be bawling all night and spitting up all over you?” Jen raised an eyebrow, seemingly convinced that I wouldn’t be able to handle it.
I gulped, “I can handle all that…I’ll show you!” I cried indignantly, causing Carisma to look up and Harry to waver in Carisma’s arms.
“Sorry,” I apologized meekly before stating confidently, “Sirius Black loves a challenge…”
Jen chuckled and kissed me, “Very well, you can fantasize some more while I play with Harry,” She stood up and strolled over to Harry before cooing incoherently at him.
“Prongs,” I whined.
“What?” He answered idly, taking a seat next to Lily on the sofa.
“I’ll have you know, I don’t appreciate your son flirting with my wife…” I shot a look at Harry, who responded by flailing his puffy fists about, as the group burst in to laughter.
“Carisma…if you think that it’s the right decision then I trust you…” I sighed in to a thick muggle contraption called a mobile phone.
Carisma’s fuzzy voice answered, “It is…it’s over and I guess it’s all for the best, I can finally concentrate on becoming a Healer,”
“Well, why don’t you come over tomorrow? I’ll invite Lily and the three of us will have a lovely time together without the boys,” I retrieved my bag and stepped out of the car.
Sirius and I had decided to purchase a car to blend in with the muggles; after all, we were surrounded by muggles in this neighbourhood. Even though we’ve lived here for a while, we still haven’t gotten around to sprucing the house up yet, which explained the mundane and dull grey furniture around the house, which was in deep contrast with Lily and James’s house. Their house practically screamed suburbia. I envied them greatly. Sirius had been busy applying to Auror training courses while I was still exploring my choices.
“That’d be wonderful, it’s been a while since it was only the three of us,” Carisma’s voice wavered.
I smiled and yawned, “Great, I’ll talk to you later then?”
“Definitely,” Carisma hung up. My eyes flickered towards the distance, observing the pink and orange tinged sky. It was getting late and I still had to prepare dinner.
I unlocked the door and threw the keys on the glass coffee table before kicking the door shut behind. Flipping through the mail, I found nothing particularly interesting and proceeded to drop my belongings off.
Unzipping my bag, I retrieved a small black and white film and gazed at it slowly, running my fingers along the smooth surface. I swallowed and thought of Sirius. He was going to be ecstatic when he hears the news. I glanced at the clock.
He should be back any minute now. Reluctant to let go of the film, I felt oddly attached to it, my heart swelling at the thought of showing it to Sirius.
Before I even had a chance to reach the stove, the door flew open. I twisted around with a huge grin on my face, expecting Sirius at the door. However, the sight that I came to face to face with was one that I had never would have expected.
Voldemort floated in, his sallow and pallid face partially covered by his hood, his wand held loosely between his thin, pale fingers.
Stunned at the sight of his presence, my breath became caught in my throat as my heart drummed painfully against my chest. Unable to scream for help, I felt utterly powerless, vulnerable and cold. Gripping the film tightly in my fist, I retrieved my wand from behind my back and fighting against all my senses, I demanded with a wavering voice, “Get out.”
“Foolish girl, where are the Potters?” Voldemort seethed, vile malevolence and iniquity bled from every word.
“I’ll never tell you,” I snarled.
Voldemort laughed silkily, “Tell me where the Potters are and I’ll spare your life along with that pretty boy of yours…” He twisted his neck and almost as if he had just had an epiphany, he stopped briefly before sneering, “The secret that you bear…I’ll spare its life too,”
“You’re pathetic, you know that?” I spat, “Killing people left and right; were you not hugged enough as a child?” I jeered.
His voice low and murderous, “Lord Voldemort is merciful, I’ll give you one last chance…reveal the Potters’ residence and I shall set your family free,”
“Never,” I gripped my wand tightly, my palms sweating.
He never replied. Just as he held up his wand, I brandished mine and yelled, “S---“
Okay. Don’t panic. Maybe she won’t be mad. I gazed lovingly at my brand new motorcycle, metallic black and silver finished with a brilliant polish. Running my fingers over the leather seat, my heart felt heavy all of a sudden. How strange.
Turning around, I twirled my keys around my finger, debating on how I would tell Jen about my new motorcycle when I stopped dead in my tracks.
The Dark Mark.
Furtively suspended over the house.
Everything in the world seemed to have ceased momentarily as I scrambled towards the house. The door was ajar, a hint of light pouring out on to the dark front yard.
Shoving it open, I roared in to the eerily silent house, “JEN! JEN! WHERE ARE YOU? ANSWER ME, PLEASE! JEN!”
Silence answered my calls as I stood, swallowing in the chaotic scene. Furniture had been upturned all around the room, drawers pulled out and left in a state of disarray and our pictures…laid on the floor, scattered in to a million pieces.
That was when I spotted the lifeless hand next to the kitchen counter.
NO! IT COULDN’T BE! THIS WASN’T RIGHT, THIS WASN’T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!
Clambering towards the hand, I gazed down at the lifeless figure; her chocolate eyes were wide open and no longer warm, replaced by pure fear and panic. Everything around me felt distant as I looked at Jen, her beauty somehow enhanced by her peaceful state. My entire body shook uncontrollably as I leaned in closer to her…my beautiful and flawless Jen…
“Jen…honey, please answer me…” My voice trembled and wavered dangerously, “Please…Jen, I’ll do anything,” I trailed a quivering finger down her frosty cheek as a teardrop landed on her lips.
“Jen, wake up…say something…come on, anything…you can’t be---“ I couldn’t and wouldn’t say the word.
She remained still, staring at the ceiling. I bit my lips as I closed her eyes and pulled her in to my arms, her limbs dangling limply from her body like a rag dolls. I wept silently in to her wavy chestnut brown hair that still had her signature scent of baby powder mixed with soft perfume.
Why? Why her? Why couldn’t he have taken me? WHERE THE HELL WAS I? I should’ve been there to protect her! I promised her…
My tears fell freely as I remembered how I had promised her and myself that I would always protect her…
I wept until there were no tears, I just held her closely, slowly rocking her back and forth like a baby. My entire body felt numb, I couldn’t think. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t even breathe properly. Nothing in my mind made sense. All I knew was that I never wanted to let her go.
She couldn’t be…
No…she really couldn’t be—
It can’t be true…this is just a nightmare. That’s right, a nightmare…that I’m going to wake up from…
Please…please…tell me this isn’t true…
Something crumpled fell from Jen’s hand and on to the floor. I wiped my eyes and sniffled before picking it up. Unfurling the crinkled film with one hand, I furrowed my eyes as I tried to fathom what on earth it was.
My stomach dropped as I realized what it was, a lump grew in my throat as newborn tears spilled on to my shirt.
“You…were pregnant,” I whispered in to her ear, caressing her smooth porcelain face delicately.
“YOU WERE PREGNANT!” I bellowed wrathfully, gripping the sonogram firmly in my fist, “I’LL KILL YOU! I’LL KILL YOU, YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF---“ All of a sudden, I felt weak…helpless…feeble…
What could I possibly do when I couldn’t even…
I couldn’t even save Jen…
The front door creaked open slowly.
“WHO’S THERE?” I barked furiously, wielding my wand at the trespasser.
“It’s Moony, Sirius…what happened?” Remus pushed passed the mess and gawked in horror at the sight of Jen in my arms.
“Wha---where’s…” Carisma never finished her sentence as she screamed a scream that wasn’t her own. It sounded unfamiliar, horrendous and beyond all, achingly painful. Carisma crumbled to the floor and sobbed openly as Remus wrapped his arms around her, attempting to calm her down.
The four of us remained in our positions for God only knows how long, only Carisma’s soft whimpering could be heard through the thick silence.
“Sirius?” The voice came like an angel, mellifluous and velvety.
“Sirius?” It repeated when I refused to response.
“Sirius, you must let her go…” Dumbledore came in to view, dressed in baby blue robes, his bright blue eyes shimmered behind his half-moon spectacles.
“No…” My voice barely audible.
“Sirius, your friends are in danger…there’s nothing you can do for Jen now…” He whispered.
“Please, we’ll take good care of her…James and Lily are in danger…”
“How?” I looked up, eyes wide. That couldn’t have happen. It was the perfect plan, Voldemort couldn’t have found them. It was flawless! How could this be?
“PETER?” I hollered, making Carisma and Remus jolt.
“Yes, I believe so…we must leave,” Dumbledore placed an encouraging hand on my shoulder.
“I…” I swallowed, “I just can’t leave her…it wouldn’t be right, no, I can’t do it…” I shook my head stubbornly like a child, embracing Jen even more firmly.
“I’ll go with you, Professor, I don’t think Sirius is in the state to be anywhere else right now,” Remus spoke up from behind Dumbledore.
“Very well,” Dumbledore leaned down and whispered, “I’m very sorry for your loss, Sirius, she was a charming girl…”
A little while later, when everyone else had left the house, I opened my mouth slightly, almost afraid to speak.
“It would have been perfect,” I croaked, “What would we have named our baby? Can you just imagine it? Oh, we’d be terrible parents,” I forced a stiff laugh, “We’d spoil it so much with toys and of course, I’d teach him my mischievous ways and you would be there reprimanding me…”
I turned Jen over slightly so I could see her face, my necklace glittering around her pale neck.
“I love you so much...and I always will.”
“AVADA KEDAVRA!” Bellatrix shrieked, as a blinding ray of emerald green light shot out of her wand, hitting Sirius directly in his chest.
Falling gracefully in to the wispy, delicate veil amidst the hexes and shouts of horror, his one last glimpse of life remained focused on the warm chocolate eyes that greeted him from beyond the veil.
It was then that Sirius Black was too, out of the abyss and in to the blissful and lustrous light that awaited him.
Author's Note: I honestly cannot thank you all you readers enough! I hope you have enjoyed this last chapter and I also hope that you will review for old times' sake? Yes? Hehee. Thank you!