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One Of The Guys by maskedsiren
Chapter 1 : Prologue
 
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 53


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You ever find out that people think of you as something different than what you really are? Like: people think you are super dumb, when really you’re one of the smartest people ever? Or that you’re blonde, but you’re really a brunette? Or that you prefer vanilla when everyone assumes you love chocolate? Okay, a lot of that probably makes no sense, but I’m trying to make a point here, guys. Anyway . . . the worst would be if everyone thought you were a guy, but really, you’re a girl (Honestly, no lie)?
 
            I mean, your guy friends come to you for ‘girl help’ as they put it. You hang out a lot. Get down and dirty when it comes to sports, anything competitive really. The dynamics of a good prank and getting away with it make you anything more than happy. What's more is that you tend to blow off your gal pals when it comes to idle tasks like shopping or ‘nail painting parties’ – gag me please. When the time comes to gossip with them though, you’re always active in that game.
 
            That’s a hobby I’m willing to get real down and dirty for. It’s my Achilles Heel, if you will.
            So yeah . . . that basically explains my ode to woe, mi problemo. I never really paid any attention to how boyish my habits were until it was ever so bluntly stated by Wood, el hardass Quidditch captain/neighbor.
 
            He was going on and on about how Alicia needed to focus more on her game than on Fred, one of our beaters. His twin is a beater too, it’s kinda cool because they’re twins and beaters and they look a like and stuff . . . Anyway, Alicia freaked and yelled at him for being a git and not knowing what he was talking about. He really needs to learn what to say and what not to say to a girl. That was on the not list – Wood definitely didn’t get that memo. It was true by the way – him not knowing what he was talking about. She’s smitten for George, not Fred, stupid Wood. Don’t get me wrong, I liked him (sometimes; we had a love-hate relationship, oddest one I've had yet), he just . . . he isn’t too bright sometimes.
 
            I had already showered and changed, ready in any way to suffice my beastly stomach.

            “Ugh, girls are too bloody emotional; one minute they’re peachy and the next they’re screaming like a crazed banshee.” He grunted and held his cloak over his shoulder. We were headed up to breakfast after morning practice.

            Did he just say what I think he said? He does know he’s talking to me, right? Andy Williams? Gryffindor’s seeker? I was there and saw how he was being a jerk and opening his big trap when he shouldn’t’ve . . . is that a word? Whatever.  Didn’t he know I was going to open this big hole in my face and blabber it out to Alicia?
 
            “Erm, you do know who you’re talking to, right Wood?”  I mean, seriously, she’s one of my best friends ever, and she’s bound to yell at me about him for a good hour after she gets out of the shower, if she gets out . . . Angie and Katie had already left - they had to get their books for class.

            “Oy, sorry Williams, I forgot you were one of ‘em.”
 
            'One of ‘em’. One of whom? The team?  Hadn’t he just got done lecturing me about how fricken’ slow I’ve been lately and how I’m not acting as part of the team? Schizo, much?
 
            “One of who?”
 
            “You know, one of the girls.” Go figure. I glared at him and looked down the hallway.
 
            He forgot I was a girl? I nonchalantly rubbed my arm; in the shower I had those girl baby-making parts. Yeah, I was definitely a girl when it came to the physical aspects. I’ll admit though, the comment kinda hurt, no matter how untrue and dumb it was, or how stupid the person who said them was.
 
            “You . . . forgot?” I looked up at him with wide eyes. How can you forget someone’s gender? I never forgot he was a boy. It was just natural. Boom, Olivier Wood. Boom, guy. There was also a BOOM, quidditch, but that one really was a given.
 
            “Yeah, well, I mean, you’re Williams,” Thanks for the update, Captain Obvious, “You’re always,” He paused and bit his lip like he’s thinking or something, “You’re just one of the blokes, I guess.”
 
            “One of the blokes?” Jeez, was I playing on echo or something? “I do girl stuff too.”  Is that how everyone saw me as? One of the guys?

            Girl stuff . . . Oh! I talk to Katie, Angie, and Alicia about guys all the time, well, mostly they do the talking . . . and giggling.  Erm, I wear make-up! Sometimes . . . okay, only once when I was ten, but it’s just easier to get up in the morning without it from what I can tell. I get to sleep in longer.  I continued to rack my brain for something even remotely similar to what Kats, Angie, or Alicia do. They were girly sometimes, at least, when I paid attention; and sadly, they were the only girls I really talked to.
 
            “Like what?” He quirked a brow in question. Oh great, now he’s doubting my girlyness too! Am I really that manly? Am I really ‘one of the guys’? Wait, since when do I care what Wood thinks? This is so dumb! I am getting all hyped up because Wood’s girl-dar is most def broken. What am I worrying about? I’m happy with who I am! I don’t care about what people see me as!  And I don’t have to prove anything to anyone, especially Wood.
 
            “I thought so,” He laughed.  Ouch. Okay, maybe I do care, only a little though. I’ll get over it. I’m probably being overdramatic. Why am I even freaking about this? Pfft, Williams, chill out.

            Why would I want to be girly anyway? You have to wear dresses (which rip when you run), wear high shoes (which try to make you break your ankles), put on make-up (which takes up too much time and never makes you look that good), and do your hair! I hate that. I can never get the spells right and it ends up flying in my face the whole day and getting really frizzy... LAME! And since when did I care about what Wood thought of me? Why do I have to keep repeating that question?
 
            But Katie’s hair always looks good and she wears it down, which was basically everyday . . . But she wears those band-things in it a lot. Maybe that did something . . .
 
            “Williams, will you sit down and stop daydreaming? People will think you’re staring Diggory.” Huh? I must’ve zoned from the showers to the Great Hall. Great, now I’m an air-head too. Just the thing to add my list.
 
            “Well maybe I was.” Wood frowned and rolled his eyes from across the table. Something had his panties in a twist. What a dork.
 
            I plopped down between George and Katie and grabbed an apple.  I preferred the green ones but they were at the other end of the table . . . stupid red apples.
 
            “. . . well, what about that Hufflepuff girl? Sixth year, kinda tall, blonde . . .”
 
            “Stacy Webber? You can’t be serious.” I rolled my eyes flatly as I bit into my apple. Juice ran down my face and I wiped it off with my sleeve. Stacy Webber: bimbo.  The only real reason she got to be a Huffie instead of a Slyth-y was because she’s too thick to do any real damage to someone’s self esteem.  I believe she called me a ‘stupid red-headed girl who wears ugly robes’ – um, hello? It’s the school uniform . . . it looks exactly like the one you have on . . .
 
            Guys can be so dense - they seem a bit better off here though than back in the States. Don’t even get me started about American boys . . .
 
            “Why not? What’s wrong with her?” Could anyone really be that opaque? Did they pay no attention to any of the tittle-tattle that flies around? I looked up to see George and Lee leaning in as if I’m going to spill some huge-ass secret.
 
            “Besides being a total idiot, she’s also Miss Blabber-Mouth; can never keep a secret. Why do you think everyone knows about Steven Lacy’s small package?” I pointed downwards for embellishment, “She’s a black widow or something; you do her and socially die.” A chunk of apple fell from my mouth and onto the table and I flicked it off in some unknown direction. Lee gave a small whimper in annoyance and folded his arms across his chest. Yeah, actually, that was moi who spread that story.  But seriously, as if I would tell them that minor detail.  I know Miss Webber did shag the kid in the fourth floor broom closet, only because she so indiscreetly stumbled out with no shirt on and a poor Steven Lacy tried to help her help while holding his pants up.
 
            Seriously guys, the broom closet?
 
            I glanced at Katie out of the corner of my eye; she seemed into her pancakes. I mean, really into them.  Practically stabbing those poor little pancakes into oblivion.  I surreptitiously thought she adored Lee, though she has yet to admit it.
 
            “Do who and you socially die?” I turned around and saw Alicia finally make her appearance at the table. Took her long enough.
 
            “Webber, sixth year, Hufflepuff.” She gave a nod in agreement and sat down between Fred and Wood.
 
            Alright, so let’s back it up a bit and see who we got.
 
            First off, Alicia Spinnet. When you first meet her you think she’s just one of the ‘nice kids’; total bookworm. But damn, that girl knows how to party once you get to know her. It’s a trap or something, she reels you into thinking she’s so pleasant and then hits you this opinionated, sarcastic personality. She’s also one of Gryffindor’s chasers, damn good at it too. Right now, she’s crushing on George Weasley, a step up from David DeVoe, Ravenclaw’s keeper. She’s also brunette and has the coolest blue eyes I’ve ever seen. She’s kinda tall, but still manages to look killer in heels. She could probably kill you with them if you got her pissed off enough.
 
            The Weasleys consist of George and Fred, or Fred and George. It doesn’t really matter, their basically the same person.  They are two of the funniest kids I know.  Right now they want to start their own joke shop in Diagon Alley or something. They’ve already got kids asking for orders of their inventions. Their most popular seem to be a candy box filled with diseased little sweets. I felt bad for all the little first years they experimented with. Le sigh. When it comes to looks, they’re both decent. Flaming red hair and brown eyes that always share a hint of mischief. They’re tall too; I think that’s why Alicia and Angelina like them so much. 
 
            Next is Angelina Johnson. Perfectly sweet unless you catch her on the pitch. Super smart too. She’s my tutoring norm when it comes to Charms.  Not a bookworm like Alicia though. Apparently it just comes naturally to her or whatev. Always willing to lend a helping hand to some poor dumb student who can’t seem to do a simple levitating charm . . . .without having the object come crashing to the floor –cough-.  She always wears her hair in some form of a braid, it’s her ‘signature’ or something. Do people have those at our age? Its cute really - braids look good on her.
 
            Katie Bell is anything but a dumb blonde. She’s smart and a total opposite of nerd queen. She’s witty and will always have some smart-ass comment to throw at you when you need one. But she also knows when you need her to back you up and will definitely not take any shit from anyone. She wants to be a pro Quidditch player when she’s older, I don’t think she’s going to Uni – what folks here call college- even though she has the grades for it. Bell is also quite popular when it comes to guys, there’s always some sort of bloke after her from some House or another. I think going on dates is some sort of secret weakness to the Fairy Princess; even if she’d never admit to it.
 
            Lee Jordan. Plus the Weasleys, this trio is the best group –hell, only group- of pranksters in the school not expelled. Fancied Angelina during third year, I think he’s moved onto Katie, even if he shows no signs of doing anything about it. He’s the sports commenter for the Quidditch matches. Funny kid when you listen, always being hard on Slytherins – but they deserve it.
 
            Lastly is Oliver Wood. Keeper and Captain of the team. I met him when I moved from America to Scotland (at the young, tender age of 11) so I could go to Hogwarts.  My mom went there when she was little until she had to move to the States during third year and really regretted never coming back. So her and Frank – el step-dad and father of little gremlin (Jake) - decided it would be best for we ‘growing children’ to have the best education possible. So we made the big move. Good-bye Muggle school and Mother’s home schooling, hello foreign country. Anyway, Wood ended up being the kid down the street whose mom baked ‘Welcome to the Neighborhood’ cookies. Mother thought they were a Muggle family at first until Wood and I started arguing about Quidditch. He wore some dumb Puddlemere shirt. Um, hello? Go Canons! How could anyone possible welcome me into their neighborhood wearing that dumb thing? So apparently we started arguing in the first three minutes of laying eyes on each other; which basically laid out the rest of our future.  Don’t get me wrong! - we have our civil moments too. . . like this morning unfortunately.
 
            “Oh, here Andy. You left this in the dorms again.” Katie handed me my Potions book with a groan. “I’m not always going to go back to the dorms and get it for you.”
 
            “Yeah, but then you’d have to knowing look forward to sharing your book with me; and apparently a drool when I sleep.” She rolled her eyes and gave me a light punch in that arm.
 
            “You can’t always sleep in class, Williams.”
 
            “Can if you have an O in the class.” Yeah, Potions is the only class I seem to be good at, which only makes Snape hate me more. It’s not my fault Potions is similar to cooking, which is just really easy anyway. I mean some on, how hard is it to measure up ingredients and put them in a pot?  I finished my apple only to see Katie walking off to class without me. I grabbed my book, noticing everyone else had left too.
 
            “Katie-bird! Wait up!” I jogged up to her and she smirked. “Sorry, I should’ve thanked you for my book . . . again.”  I am pardoned with a blunt eye roll and an arm around my shoulder.




“It’s okay, I’m used to forgiving someone with the manners of a male.” Manners of a male? What is up with people not knowing my gender today? Do I have a sign on my back that says ‘I have a dick, har, har’? 
 
            “Thanks Your Majesty. Please tell me if I may grovel at your feet.” I rolled my eyes as she gave a short, blunt laugh.  Sarcastic: it was one of my favorite qualities of Katie. Though, sometimes I would really have to guess if she was being serious with me or not.
 
            “You got that right.” I sat down at the desk next to her and began flipping through the chapters in Super Lame Potions 101.  Today is Thursday which meant lecture day, or in my case, 80 minute nap day! Woo hoo!
 
            “Do you honestly think I am going to let you waste your education by sleeping?” I opened one eye from my somewhat comfortable position on my book; Chapter 7: Quick and Easy Potions for A Needed Emergency. Which is ridiculous by the way, who has time to make a potion in an emergency?

            “I was hoping.” She frowned and looked ahead toward the board as Snape walked in. Ugh, he’s so gross looking. His nose roughly equaled a third elbow and his hair looks like it has never been washed, at least with any soap that is. His voice was real nasally too, as if he couldn’t properly breathe from that third joint of his face.
 
            It’s Thursday though, so I don’t have another class till after lunch, and that’s Muggle Studies. Burbage is pretty chill, other than being very defensive when it comes to them ‘non-magical folk’.  She’s gets in quite a tizzy when other students (mostly Slytherins, but there are others who share the same view) find them pointless and barbaric because they don’t have magic. I personally have no problem with them, I like their clothing styles a lot better, and I think my dad was one.
 
            We don’t talk about him much at home. Mom refuses to tell me anything about him except that he left when I was little; I personally imagine he was married. It’s much more dramatic that way and I think I find it easier to believe that he could leave us because he was having an affair. The affair also makes sense because when I was born, I got stuck with Mother’s unusually common maiden name, which basically murdered any chance I have of finding him without her help. Whatever, I’m over it - that basically ends the tale of little Andy and Bio-Dad Anonymous.
 
            “Do you think Alicia’s okay? I mean, Wood was pretty tough on her this morning.” Katie whispered to me, today we’re sitting pretty far back in the class, so it’s okay to chitchat quietly.

            “Yeah, Wood’ll get what’s coming to him sooner more so than later. I think he’s having man PMS.”
 
            “Either that or Victoria got to him last night,” Her face faltered into a small frown but she still managed to roll her eyes.
 
            “Who?” Victoria ? Why did that name sound so familiar? Victoria and Wood . . . Wood and Victoria . . . I tried to think back if I heard anything about it yet . . .
 
            “Victoria Snickett. She’s in your Herbology class. You complain about her all the time . . .”

            “Icky Vicky? Why would she get to him?”
 
            “They’re sort of dating.”
 
            Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Time out!  Wood’s dating Icky Vicky? Since when? Why haven’t I been told sooner? And how did Katie know this before I bloody did?
 
            I’ll admit that I was a bit offended that Kat knew this before me. I mean, I could give two knots about Wood’s flavor of the week.  But-
 
            “Wait. Did I know something about one of our fellow students before the Queen of Gossip, herself?” She gave me a look of mock surprise and placed her hand over her mouth.
 
            “No, I just don’t keep tabs on who Wood’s shagging. I care about more important things. Like what’ going on between our darling Alicia and her current cavalier.” I wiggled my eyebrows and grinned.  Subject change, please and thank you.
 
            “Yeah! Did you see those two this morning? If they weren’t on their brooms, they would be all over each other!”
 
            Cha-ching! Thank you, come another time, please.  A.D.D. Katie was once again easily distracted. I sighed as she began to divulge this already well known info. I turned to look forward, leaning slightly to give her the hint that I was still listening. I wasn’t of course, but who would want to rain on her parade?
 
            “Oy, sorry Williams, I forgot you were one of ‘em.”

            “One of who?”

            “You know, one of the girls.”
 
            I couldn’t get his voice out of my head. It was like a broken record or something.  And, no matter what I did, I couldn’t get it to go away!
 
            It taunted me throughout lunch, Muggle Studies, and Arithmacy.  To make it shoddier even, it had to be his voice. I tried replacing it with someone from The Weird Sisters, however having their voices mock me only made it worse.
 
            Finally, I had enough. I had to put an end to it.
 
            “SHUT UP!”   
 
            “Erm Andy? No one was talking.” My green eyes met Alicia’s ocean blue ones before I slammed my face into my pillow. Did I really say that out loud? Damn me and my mouth. 

            I quickly glanced at my clock, it was one of those cute Muggle ones with the glowing letters, 10 AM - the girls were already in their pajamas, squeezing their pillows, it was girl time. I suddenly grew a longing to throw myself off the roof or smother myself.
 
            “Are you alright? You’ve been really quiet since potions . . .” I sat up, hugging the death out of my feathered friend; I was hoping Katie wouldn’t have taken notice. I had tried to be as talkative and cheerful as someone who hasn’t just noticed that everyone thinks she is a boy. Le sigh; no use in denying it, or else no one would get any sleepy tonight. I took a deep breath before releasing what had been on my mind all day.

            “Am I really . . . do I give off . . .” It was suddenly becoming hard for me to find words. Where was my ever-so-helpful mental dictionary when I needed it?
 
            “Spit it out!” Alicia was beginning to twiddle her hair with her fingers in a rather obnoxious manner.
 
            “Yeah!” They were all staring at me, wide eyed and eager. I guess it’s my fault for that; it’s what I got for talking about others way more than myself.
 
            “Okay, okay. What I’m really trying to ask is . . . do I come off as, er . .boy-ish?”  The last word sort of fell out of my mouth, uncomfortable and perturbed. I inwardly winced at the awkward silence I had instantly created with those pitiful six words. Merlin, I was pathetic.
 
           “What would give you that idea?” I couldn’t tell if Angelina was being sarcastic or not, so I risked answering anyway.
 
            “Well this morning, after you two had left,” I nodded towards her and Katie’s direction, “And Alicia was still in the shower, Wood and I were talking, well, he was mostly complaining . . .” And I began to tell them about our oh-so-pleasant conversation on our way to the Great Hall.
 
            “What a prude!” Alicia scoffed as she continued to pick at her already chipping nail polish – thank Merlin she had stopped with the hair. Katie nodded in agreement while Angie decided to open her mouth. I could already sense a lecture, in fact, I could smell it. 

            “Well, he is right, you know.”
 
            That was unexpected. She had definitely strayed from her norm as overly protective friend and was now siding with the enemy. He was winning and he didn’t even know there had been a battle.
 
            “Well, here, we’ll start with the basics,” She began defending herself by making me stand up and turn in a full circle.
 
            “Hair: always pulled back tightly in a ponytail, or bun, or braid, or whatever. Very non-girly.”
 
            The other two nodded and I could already feel my cheeks change temperature in humiliation. This was definitely the time to start asking the ‘why me?’ question.
 
            “And you’re always wearing trousers or those really long skirts of yours. . .”
 
            “You never wear much make-up . . .”

            “And your manners! The way you eat is just . . .” They all began rambling on amongst themselves at me. I could barely catch bits and pieces until they all suddenly began nodding in agreement at something, something that I knew I was going to utterly regret. 

            They were going to make me over; I could already see it in their over-glorified faces – I was going to turn into one of their Wendy Witch dolls, plastic and magical. Just the perfect thing to add to my resume.
 
            I fell back into my bed, “Fine.”  Katie immediately ran over to dresser and began to pull out my skirts.
 
            “What are you doing!? I said alright to a make-over, not a destroy Andy’s clothes party!” She already had her wand out; I could only watch in horror as my skirt was being cut to shreds before my eyes.
 
            “My aunt taught this great hemming spell. Come here, I need to measure you.”
 
            “Sandra Dullipe showed this really cool charm for curly hair; oh Andy! This is so exciting!”
 
            “Can we at least try not to overwhelm me here? I’m kinda at new at this.” I whimpered as Kats pulled me off of my bed and began to measure my legs, I was defiantly going to regret this in the morning. All I could do was look at the large chunks of my skirt on the floor. 

            “Sure, we’ll take it slow,” Alicia was already looking through her make-up bag, “Oh! This is so exciting! You’ll be like our own little experiment, Andy! Don’t worry though, we’re pros!”  

            Oh thank Merlin; I thought I was only dealing with three over hormonal, teenage witches . . .




**

Wow, I must admit, if you got this far, I don't know whether to be surprise or thrilled, or both! So, here are so cookies! This is my first Harry Potter fanfic, so feel free to tell me what you thought of it, even if you didn't like it. I'm always looking for ways to improve my writing. Thank you! *hugs*

Edited: August 8th, 2008

Betaed: August 25th, 2008 by the ever lovely Aya! Thanks so much darling!


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