Chapter 41 : An Eyelash Curler
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Disclaimer: Nah, I still don't own Harry Potter. All these characters belong to J.K. Rowling...
James and Sirius were officially apart of the Disguise and Concealment Department.
They had been working there for two weeks—and were on fairly good terms with their co-workers. The two boys had quickly learned the rules of the trade. It was fairly simple. They would listen to the client’s story, or in some cases, an auror telling the client’s story, and then they would discuss their options disguise wise. Most of the time they just had to recommend adding a few wrinkles or changing the hair color. But ever so often there was a person in serious trouble. They had managed to tick off a possible Death Eater, or if they were lucky, Lord Voldemort himself. These people needed to learn about the Fidilius Charm—what it was, when to use it, how to apply it, and how to follow it. It was an extremely complex process…and took a very powerful spell caster to complete.
James and Sirius were usually up to their necks in work, but every so often they found a few spare moments to carry on a conversation.
“This place needs more excitement,” commented Sirius one morning.
“That it does,” agreed James, scribbling on a piece of parchment. He thought for a moment. “I say we pull the prank we discussed a couple weeks ago.”
Sirius grinned devilishly. “The top secret one?”
“The one and only.”
“But that is pretty daring, don’t you think? Even for us…”said Sirius.
“Has that ever stopped us before?” James smirked.
“So what do you say?”
“I say that we’re both going to hell.”
“Does that bother you?”
Sirius tipped his chair back on two legs. “Nope.”
“You know what to do?”
“Yeah. As we head out for lunch I’ll stop and snag it from her. Then we’ll come back from lunch with it.”
James smiled. “Alright.”
Sirius fixed his eyes on the target. She was sitting behind her desk and flattening down her blond, bottle, hair.
He stopped in front of her and smiled as dazzling as he could. “Hey. Kelly, right?”
Yes, they were going to attempt a prank on the one and only receptionist.
She fluttered her artificial black eyelashes. “Actually, it’s Kerri.” She touched his arm lightly and gave a high pitched giggle. “But I forgive you.”
“Are you sure? Because I did mess up your name. If there’s anything I can do to make it up, just ask.”
“Well…in that case…” She smiled seductively. “You can come behind this desk and keep me company.”
Sirius inwardly groaned, wondering what he had gotten himself into.
He matched her smile. “Of course.”
James was sitting on the couch of their flat when Sirius appeared, looking unraveled, but smiling nonetheless. “I got it.”
“Ha, she couldn’t resist your charm, could she?”
“Is that lipstick on your face?”
Sirius blushed, wiped a hand across his mouth, and muttered. “She insisted on giving me a good-bye kiss.”
“More like a good-bye snog.”
“Oh no way would I let her do that.”
“Yeah, yeah, sure. So, come on, bring out the goods.”
Sirius rummaged around his pocket and pulled out a pencil case, followed by his wand. He tapped the case once and suddenly a bulging, black, bag was sitting on the table.
“Christ almighty!” exclaimed James, leaping up. “That has got to add five pounds to someone. Is it possible to wear that much makeup?”
Indeed, just about every cosmetic known to man was protruding from the sack: Mascara, eyeliner, eye shadow, cover-up, foundation, blush, eyebrow pencils, lip stick, lip gloss, lip liner, bronzer, tanning lotion, lip volumizers, creams, sprays, exc., exc., exc. It was all there.
“No wonder girls take so long getting ready,” commented Sirius, examining a tube of glitter spray.
He unscrewed the cap and peered at it. He pushed the button and a whole cloud of silvery glitter shot out and engulfed his face. He immediately dropped the bottle and began swatting at his face and coughing at the same time. “It’s burning my eyes!...and my throat!...and my nose! God, it’s EVERYWHERE!”
James began to howl with laughter at the sight of Sirius flapping around with his face scrunched up.
“So, we’re really going to put all this stuff on?”
Sirius blew his nose into a handkerchief. “Oh yeah.”
“But which one first?”
There were over fifty products scattered over their table.
James picked up a bottle of liquid foundation and hesitantly dabbed a bit on the tip of his nose. “This is so weird…”
Together, the two boys dug through Kerri’s makeup bag and tested her appliances on thief ace. They both brushed a large amount of blush on their cheekbones, turning them bright red. James chose a turquoise blue eye shadow and applied a thick layer all the way up to his heavily lined eyebrows.
Sirius took a midnight black eyeliner and traced the shape of his eyes about nineteen times over. He had also gotten hold of a bottle of a fruity scented perfume…and had some fun spraying it on every surface he encountered.
James spread a lip volumizing gloss over his mouth and watched as his lips magically transformed before his eyes. “Oooh, it tingles…”
“Hey Prongs?” called Sirius, who had been standing by the table and rummaging through what was left of the cosmetics. “What is this thing?”
James looked at the instrument, bewildered. It was about five inches long. On one side there was a clamp…and the other side had handles that resembled those belonging to scissors—except the clamp was rotated so that it was perpendicular to the handles.
“I dunno Mate…but it looks lethal. What do you think it does?”
“Tortures people? Maybe Kerri works for Voldemort and this is an elite weapon.”
“Not likely. She’s not smart enough.”
“Well…what is it? A fancy nail clipper?”
A sudden realization his James. “Oh, wait! I think my Mum’s got one of those…it’s for eyelashes.”
“What do you do? Yank them out?”
“Nah. You curl them?”
“An eyelash curler ?”
“It looks like it could be used to wrench out someone’s eyeball …”
“Well, you know women. They have to buy products to make themselves look better…so artificial.”
Sirius opened his eyes really wide and held up the eyelash curler. “Oh, I see. You clamp it onto the hairs like this…and…OWW!”
James looked up from where he was dusting powder on his chin. “What did you do to yourself now?”
Sirius held up the curler. A few dozen eyelashes were hanging from it. His right lid was stripped of all hair. “I just ripped out all of my eyelashes !”
James took one look at him and began to laugh. “I’m sure there are some fake ones around here somewhere,” he choked out.
He reached underneath his chair and pulled out a box of false lashes.
He held them out to Sirius. “Here.”
Sirius, massaging his eyeball, took the container grudgingly and attempted to glue one to his eyelid. It wouldn’t stick.
Muttering something about cheap feminine products, he pulled out his wand and magically adhered the fake eyelashes where his real ones had once been.
He bathed them in blue mascara and then dumped the rest of the products back into the bag.
Beside him, James was finishing up with a tube of raspberry colored lipstick.
They looked in the mirror together.
“We look hot,” commented Sirius.
“So we’re really going back to work looking like this?”
“You scared?” James teased.
“Nope…just thinking about how sexy this liner makes my eyes look.”
“Get over yourself.”
“Ha-ha, Kerri is never going to speak to us again.”
“Good point. How’re we going to give her bag back?”
“We could just hand it to her on our way in…”
The two boys stepped off the lift together, earning themselves several puzzled glances from those stepping on.
The walked straight into the auror department. Sirius set the makeup bag down on the desk, causing the receptionist to look up and gape at them.
“We found this lying around…and couldn’t resist,” said James, smiling and causing this foundation to crack slightly.
An inaudible snarl escaped Kerri’s mouth. She pulled out a black compact and clicked it open. The powder flew everywhere.
The boys hadn’t exactly put her cosmetics back the way they had found them. The eye shadow brushes had been stuffed into the blush.
Eyeliner pencils were shoved into mascara tubes, exc.
Kerri looked as if she was going to explode. She tried calming herself by taking a few deep breaths.
Sirius nudged James and raised his eyebrows.
The receptionist let out an ear-piercing shriek.
This caused the aurors to come running over and make sure that someone like Voldemort hadn’t broken it. They were always paranoid.
Instead, they found James and Sirius covered in half-inch thick makeup, cowering from a fuming, powder covered, woman.
Everyone froze mid-action.
At that moment Sirius’ false eyelashes chose to fall off.
The two boys burst out laughing. Before long they were clutching their sides and gasping for air.
The aurors, satisfied that nothing serious had happened, also began chuckling. A few pulled out cameras and snapped some shots of the boys.
“That’ll be out Christmas card,” one muttered.
Kerri looked humiliated…and everyone seemed to be laughing at her as much as they were at the two boys.
Frank and Alice came forward together to congratulate Sirius and James.
“Just like old times,” said Alice, looking somewhat sad.
“Alright,” came a gruff voice from the back of the crowd. It was Moody. “Back to work. Every minute you stand there someone is dying.”
That seemed to jolt everyone back to reality. They headed back to their stations.
Sirius and James tipped Kerri an imaginary hat and walked towards their own department, already anticipating the laughter they would cause…
The world needed more laughter…especially in times like these.
Well, I hope that you guys enjoyed this. I really did. =)
Oh my GOD! Sorry, my sister's watching the Hannah Montana achey-jakey heart thingy...and now I finally am being forced to watch it.
He walked in in shining armor! So romantic! God, here's my cheesy side coming out again.
Anywho, I'm rambling too much. Leave a review please!
EDIT: One last thing. I'm really nervous. Why? Because I just did the math...and realized that this story will be over in twelve chapters. Seven of which, are already done. Is that just scaring me?
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