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Look at me by DarknessIsMyOnlyFriend
Chapter 1 : Try to truly see something in me
 
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Part 1

Rosabella Caprice stood before her lengthy mirror wondering what people saw when they saw her. She viewed her long brown hair that never seemed to be persuaded to stay put in one fashion. Then her eyes wondered over her hourglass figure, for which she had to work hard. Her mother would not allow any pounds to be gained. Though she loved her mother, she wished that for once she could just be herself and eat away the day. Yet she knew she could not. She looked at her breasts and her buttocks and was happy to see it was just fine. Nothing t little nor to much. Yet maybe it would have been easier if she had been different, to have to little or to much. Who knew! But she would most likely never find out.

And lastly she looked at her eyes. Dull dark brown eyes that had lost their shimmer long ago. The day her mother packed their bags and dragged her to another country. The moment her mother met a new man to fill the void in her life and that would ruin the life of her daughter. Of course her mother did not know that, for she never wished bad upon her daughter. But for Rosabella life wasn’t good, it wasn’t easy and it most definitely wasn’t fun. Again she looked herself in the eyes before sighing and trying to zip up the dress that she was supposed to wear tonight.

She thought back to the times that she had been happy. When her father had still been alive and her family was still together. When she would run down the street to meet her grandmother. When she still smiled. When her mother still smiled. When they were still living in Italy. However she pulled herself away from her train of thoughts, it had been to long. She had only been nine when her father passed away from a spell gone wrong and she had been ten when she was forced to learn the English language. And she had only just turned eleven when she was roughly pulled away from her mother to go to boarding school.
Rosabella was sixteen now to the day and she no longer regretted ever being sent to that school. Hogwarts had proven to be quite adventurous and fun. She had learned not only magic there, but the different kinds of love that were able to exist in the world. A world that became darker every year. Yet she tried not to notice as she smiled her way through life.
Yes she smiled a lot and many of those times she did, it was not even a fake one either. She was reasonably happy with her life at Hogwarts. At home things were different though.

“Rosa dear are you ready?” her mother, Romana, asked as she quietly walked into her daughters room.
“Yes mother nearly done, if only you could help zipping up the back.” She replied with a smile.
“Where is Maria?” Her mother asked looking around for the maid.
“I sent her off early today, she was coming down with a cold” Rosabella replied looking back at her mother.
“Good thinking, would not want you to get ill with the festivities so close” Romana said again looking to be in deep thought and Rosabella just rolled her eyes.

“The zipper mother?” she quietly reminded her mother who came back to the land of the living with a small blush. She helped her daughter before walking out of the room again without a word.
Applying the finishing touches of her makeup, Rosabella walked out of her door. Yet not before positioning her wand underneath her dress. Nobody needed to know she kept it close at all times and she felt safer that way. Painting a smile on her face she felt ready to great the outside world again. Another night of mingling and boring talks about politicians that didn’t do their job well.





Sirius Black stood in his private bathroom looking over his attire for today once more. He looked dashing, he knew that. He knew many female eyes would linger on him as he walked by and he knew they would want him to follow them into the garden.
Yet he wasn’t happy at all. Just because he also knew they would never see him, the person he truly was. He knew they would never introduce him to their parents, walk with him in public. He was aware that he had been banned from all important pureblood families. The only reason he was brought along was for his mother to show him and the others that she still had some control over her eldest son. And to make sure that son wasn’t having a good time with friends. After had embarrassed her all those years ago when he was sorted, she wanted nothing more then to make him feel miserable.

“Sirius, get down here this minute. I won’t let you make us appear late!” His father, Orion, bellowed from downstairs. The boy knew his father was better not angered and he slowly made his way downstairs. Though he made no hurry he knew better then to not come at all. His back was still severely bruised from last night. He wasn’t in the mood for a rematch.

As he walked down the stairs his father was already on his way up, having believes his son would once again fail to respond to his callings.
Just for the thoughts his father had, Sirius received a smack in the head. It wasn’t too bad and Sirius knew he was lucky they had a party to attend. If not he might have been lying on the bottom of the stairs by this time. The young boy wondered how much longer he would be able to handle this kind of living, but for today he just had to put through with it. For today he’s have to stand and be humiliated and only for today he had to pretend they were able to break his spirit. But he knew deep inside himself, it would not be long anymore. Soon he would break free from their grasp and soon he would be able to live a happy life. Soon. And soon could not come quick enough for the boy.







The party had already begun by the time Rosabella walked into the ballroom and she was quickly pulled aside by her father, stepfather.
“Where were you?” he whispered harshly, still managing to keep a smile on his face.
“I was getting ready, now could you release my arm you are cutting off my circulation. And if it bruises everyone will see” she said calmly as if his action had by no means effected her.
“We would not want that” he replied and quickly released her, yet she knew he was not yet finished with her and once the guest had left tonight he would finish what he had started.

Rosabella walked away from the man and decided it would be best to mingle a little. It was best to be a good hostess, that way the anger of her stepfather, William Rosier, might diminish during the evening. She soon stood face to face with his son though, Even Rosier. Though they lived the same faith they could not see eye to eye. Rosabella hated the boy with a passion. His rough demeanour was poisonous and she rarely wished to converse with him.

“late again?” he asked smirking, knowing tonight it would be her to face his wrath and not him. Rosabella choose to just glare before walking off, instead of replying in any form that needed words. All she said would later be used against her.
Looking around she spotted her mother and decided to stand by her side tonight. Her mother needed support just as bad as she did.





Sirius and his family had entered only a few moments ago and ever since he had been following Rosabella’s every move. Her beauty enthralled him and so did the smile she always wore, which had never reached her eyes.
He saw how she was roughly pulled aside by William Rosier and later saw the sneering face of Evan towering over her. But after she sought refuge by her mothers side he was done following her and concentrated on staying as far away from everyone as he could possibly manage. All without loosing his arrogant demeanour. He still had a reputation to uphold after all.





Rosabella looked around to see if she could find him, the one she needed to get through these nights. The one that made her get through the weeks of torment at home and the one that never asked anything in return for all the things he did for her.
She winked at him as soon as she found him and walked into the garden.





By the end of the evening he received the signal and off he went, into the garden. There she would be waiting. The woman that made these night worth while. The one that could make it all bearable. The one that satisfied his lust without asking much in return.




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