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Chapter 5 : Talking
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Harry woke up the next morning, feeling like shit. He thought about the night before when he kissed Hermione. It had felt so right to him, but she had run away from it. Then he had gone to talk to Ron, but he only glared at him before walking away with Luna.
Harry was so confused, it was hard to enjoy the party no matter how hard he tried. He kept thinking about Hermione and how his heart broke. I was so stupid to think that she had the same feeling for me, he thought.
Sighing, he got out of bed and went into the bathroom to get ready. Once he was ready, he went downstairs to see Ron and Hermione already up. Both of them glanced up when he walked in, but Ron merely glared before looking back at his food while Hermione looked down at her tea. Harry wasn’t going to take this. He walked past them and out the back door.
Harry stomped outside, looking around to find a place to think, but he knew that soon someone would come looking for him and he wouldn’t get the chance to clear his head. Harry looked up to the roof. That would be the perfect place to hide and think. Apparating onto the roof, he saw that he was not the only one there. Tawny sat at the end of the other side of the roof, looking at the sunrise. He hesitated for a moment, but then he shrugged and went to join her.
“Hey,” he said softly, taking at seat next to her. She jumped a little, but smiled faintly.
“Hey,” she replied, “what are you doing up here?”
Harry chuckled. “I could ask you the same thing.” They both laughed. “So, what are you doing up here?”
“I came up here yesterday morning to watch the sunrise. It’s kind of a place where I can think for awhile, just to get away from people.” She shrugged. “Why are you up here?”
Harry wasn’t looking at her, but at the sunrise. “Same as you. I just came out here to think. I’ve got a lot to think about, especially after what happened last night.”
“Oh, you mean with you and Hermione?” Harry nodded slowly, looking at the ground. He brought his knees close to his chest. “I’m sorry. It must be hard to get rejected like that. I should leave you alone for a few minutes.” Tawny got up, but Harry grabbed her arm.
“No, please stay,” he whispered.
Tawny gave him a look but sat back down. “So what happened to you not trusting me?”
Harry stole a glance at her. Her eyes turned a bright amber color from the sunshine; they were so much like Hermione’s. It hurt to think about, so he shook his head and looked back at the sunrise coming over the city. He thought about the first two days Tawny had been here and how he treated her. She didn’t deserved to be treated that way. She did save his life, so he could at least try to be a friend to her. He owed her that much. Looking over at her again, he said. “I know I didn’t come to you in a friendly way, but you saved my life back at the Ministry. Let’s start over, become friends.”
Tawny smiled and extended her hand. Harry clasped her hand and shook it. “Friends,” she said. They let go of each other’s hands and sat in silence, watching the sunrise. It already came up over the city, so it wasn’t really a sunrise anymore, but they still watched. They could hear the birds chirping, the air was clear from the rain a few days ago. “So do you want to tell me what happened last night?”
Harry shrugged. “I don’t know. It felt right, holding her like that, and how we kept looking at each other. It just felt right, and the kiss, well, I never felt that way before.” He smiled at this, thinking how her lips felt on his. “I kissed girls before, but there was nothing like it. I felt like I was in heaven, like nothing mattered.” He paused, wondering if he was doing the right thing by confiding in her about this. He looked over at Tawny. She was smiling at him, encouraging him to go on. “Then she just pulled away, looking at me like it was a mistake. My heart broke right there; that look on her face said it all. Then Ron wouldn’t talk to me at all. This morning he glared at me and Hermione wouldn’t even look at me.”
“It sounds to me like maybe Hermione didn’t regret it, but she felt guilty. When I saw her pull away from you, she was looking at Ron, who did look angry.”
Harry nodded gloomily, “that’s the problem. Ron likes Hermione a lot. For all I know, she could like him just as much as he likes her.”
Tawny nodded. “But Hermione doesn’t like Ron.” Harry gave her a confused look. “I saw the way she was looking at you. I saw the way you both looked at each other. That was love I saw. For the two days I’ve been here, I’ve never seen Hermione look at Ron that way.”
Harry couldn’t help but smile, but the smile quickly faded. “How do I know if it’s true?”
Tawny shrugged. “I don’t know. You are going to have to talk to her and to Ron too. If he’s a good friend, he will understand.”
Harry nodded and looked back at the now risen sun, thinking about what Tawny just said. It was like what Ginny said: he needed to talk to Hermione, but she looked like she didn’t want to talk just yet.
“Harry, breakfast is ready!” Ginny yelled from the ground.
He turned to Tawny who gave him a shy smile. “We better go before they come looking for you.”
“Harry, where are you?” Ginny yelled again. The two couldn’t help but chuckle.
“Come on, we better go before they send the whole house looking for us,” Harry said, helping Tawny up. They Apparated off the roof to the front door. Harry, still getting used to Apparating, tripped when his feet touched the ground.
Tawny was still laughing at him as they came into the kitchen. Tawny couldn’t help but look over at Hermione who looked a little hurt when she saw Tawny and Harry walked in, laughing together. A part of her felt guilty, but she just ignored it and took a seat next to Harry.
During breakfast, mostly everyone was laughing at Fred and George’s stories from days at Hogwarts, except for Hermione and Ron. Ron just sat there glaring at Harry. Hermione just sat quietly poking at her food, sending Tawny looks every once in a while. Finally, she couldn’t take it anymore and walked out of the room. Ginny watched her leave then glared at both Harry and Tawny who were staring at Hermione’s back.
Two weeks had past and Ron would only give Harry glares and leave every time they were in the same room. Harry got really tired of it. It was killing him, not having Ron around to talk to, but Ron refused to talk to him, no matter how hard Harry tried. Hermione would look his way sometimes, but would look away as soon as Harry caught her eyes. She, too, kept her distance. He wanted so badly to talk to her, but what could he say? What if she regretted the kiss? He would just embarrass himself if she said that she did not like him in that way and that the kiss meant nothing to her.
On top of that, Ginny was acting like Ron, but once in a while she would yell at him, saying he had hurt Hermione’s feeling. Harry didn’t understand it. After all, it was Hermione who walked away from him after they kissed and wouldn’t talk to him.
That morning, Harry walked into the kitchen to get his breakfast. Once he took his seat, Ron got up and left the room. He sighed. It was starting to get frustrating, Ron shouldn’t be acting this way when he told Harry he did not like Hermione that way. He needed to talk to him soon.
“You okay?” Tawny asked. She was sitting right next to him. Harry just nodded and started eating his breakfast. Tawny sighed too. She knew he was upset. His two best friends wouldn’t talk to him and Ginny kept glaring at both her and Harry. Luna was the only one that was actually talking to her and Harry. She would always tell them it would past and everything would go back to normal. But Tawny and Harry did not really believe that.
After breakfast, as always Harry would leave the table and lock himself in his room to study Defense Against the Dark Arts books his close friends and professors gave to him for his birthday and practice a few new spells. He would also try to find any information about the Horcruxes, but he couldn’t think well enough to study what the other Horcruxes could be. He only knew that Voldemort used the Hufflepuff cup, the ring, Nagini and something from Ravenclaw or Gryffindor.
After that, he would take a break and go down for lunch. Then, he, Tonks and Remus would go into one of the spare rooms and do dueling matches for a few hours. At first, Harry would only be in the duel for a few minutes before he was defeated, but after awhile he started to stay in longer getting sneaky and attacking when ever he could.
At the moment they were in one against two duel, Harry was behind a chair waiting for the right moment to come out of his hiding area and attack Remus and Tonks.
Once in a while the two Order members would send a hex and hit the chair just to see if Harry would get out of his hiding spot.
Harry crawled over to a couch watching the other couch on the other side of the room for Tonks and Remus. Once behind the couch he leaned over to the other end aiming his wand at the other couch. Tonks pop her head out from the side, her arm came out as she aimed it at the chair Harry had hided behind.
“Stupefy!” he yelled, Tonks did not have a chance to dodge or block the spell and it hit her on her left shoulder.
Harry jumped to his feet pushing the couch out of the way and before he could run toward Remus, the werewolf also jumped to his feet and yelled out a spell Harry couldn’t quit hear.
The couch next to him exploded sending many pieces of wood every where, Harry fell backward and landed on his back. A sharp pain ran through his arms, but he ignored them and leap back onto his feet ready to attack.
“Stop!” Remus shouted “that’s enough Harry.”
Harry lowered his wand; while he tried to catch his breath Harry eyed Remus carefully.
Remus put his wand away and walked over to Tonks and helping her up “that was very good Harry, your getting better.”
Harry nodded “thanks.”
“Were done for the day so why don’t you go get some rest.” Tonks replied.
Putting his wand away Harry walked over to the door “Thanks guys” he replied and walked out the door.
On the way to his room, Harry looked down at himself. He really needed a shower. There were a few cuts on his arms, his pants were torn, and so was his shirt. But this thought flew out of his mind the moment he walked into the room and spotted Ron sitting on his bed.
“Ron, what are you doing in here?” he asked, a little shocked that Ron was there. Ron looked from the floor to Harry, and Harry could see confusion and guilt in his eyes.
“Harry, I wanted to talk to you about what has been wrong with me for the past few weeks,” Ron said, looking at anything but Harry.
Harry closed the door before turning back to Ron and crossing his arms. “Ok, talk.”
Ron drew a deep breath and started, “look, I don’t know how to tell you, but I’m not mad at you about what happened between you at Hermione at your party.”
Harry dropped his arm, staring at Ron in disbelief. “Then what was with the glares and not talking to me?”
Ron lowered his head. “I thought I loved Hermione when you first kissed her at the party, but I didn’t feel the anger I should have felt. The reason I didn’t talk to you was because I was more confused than I’ve ever been. I tried to act mad and it worked to hide my confusion about my feelings.” Ron paused, looking at Harry again. “Mate, I know how you feel about Hermione. I see the way you look at her. I might be stupid sometimes, but I know love when I see it.”
Harry just stared at Ron, shocked. Ron smiled at his expression and waved his hand dismissively. “I’ll get over it. Go talk to Hermione, it’ll all work out. Besides, I found someone else I think I love.”
Harry nodded, walking over to Ron and giving him a hug. “Thanks, mate.”
Ron smiled back, patting him on the back. “Anytime.”
Hermione walked into the room and saw Tawny on her bed, reading a book. She was shocked to see Tawny wearing glasses. They weren’t round like Harry’s. Hers were small, black rectangle shaped, but somehow it almost made her look like Harry.
“What are you staring at?” Tawny asked when she saw Hermione stare.
Hermione shook her head, glaring at her. “I didn’t know you wore glasses,” she said coldly.
Tawny took off her glasses and put both the glasses and the book aside. “As a matter of fact, I do. You got a problem with that?”
Hermione shook her head. “No, it just makes you look like a geek, that’s all.” She snapped, but regretted those words the moment she said them.
Tawny sat there, glaring at her. She was not going to take this when she did nothing to her or Ginny or everyone else that has been treating her like she shouldn’t even exist. Tawny got off the bed and walked over to Hermione. “Look, I have no idea what I did to you, but it’s your problem. All you have done is be rude to me when I have not done anything?!”
Hermione only moved closer to Tawny, looking at her in the eye. “All you have done is taken Harry from me and guess what? You win! I don’t care anymore about that, but I am not going to let him get hurt by you! I know you are hiding something from us and I don’t trust you at all since I caught you talking to someone in that mirror of yours. I’m going to find out one way or another,” she said the last part in a cold whisper.
Tawny stared at the girl in front of her, dumbfounded. “What are you talking about? How do I win Harry?”
Hermione sighed and sat down on her bed. “I see Harry going outside every morning to be with you and you two spend a lot of time together. I know he likes you, but I’m not going to let you hurt him.”
Tawny sighed in frustration and sat next to her. “Hermione, I don’t think Harry likes me in that way and I know I don’t like him in that way. He meets me outside every morning so we can watch the sunrise and he needs someone to talk to about some things. I was just there when he needed it. He and I are just trying to get to know each other a little better, because he feels bad that we didn’t start out so well.”
Hermione looked up at Tawny. “How can I know you’re telling the truth?”
Tawny had a faint smile on her face. “Because you can ask Harry. There is nothing going on. If you must know, he was talking to me about someone he likes a lot, and don’t get too disappointed about who that is. You might be surprised.
“And as for catching me talking to someone in the mirror, which I knew you and Ginny heard, I went through a lot of trouble to get to England and into Hogwarts. I wasn’t going to let some stupid people I know ruin that for me.”
Now Hermione was confused. “Why?”
Tawny sighed. She got off the bed and walked over to the window to look at the neighborhood in front of her. “There are many things going on now that Voldemort came back. A lot of places aren’t safe anymore. That also goes for where I came from. My school was destroyed. There’s nothing left there except for horrible memories, and the lives that were lost there.” She bowed her head; it was a few seconds later when she looked back out the window. “The only way Dumbledore would agree to let me in the school was to help you guys out. But I can’t do that when no one’s talking to me. I’m glad that Harry has finally started talking to me. He’s starting to trust me enough to a point where I can start training him, but I can’t train you or Ron if you don’t trust me,” she said, turning around to face Hermione again.
Hermione got off the bed and walked over to Tawny. “What happened to your school?”
Tawny took a deep breath and said, “a while ago, like in May, my school was attacked by dark wizard called the Dark Knights. The school was taken over. Lots of people went into hiding, but because there’s no other reason for me to stay there, I came here. That’s when I ran into the Order fighting some Death Eaters and I asked Dumbledore if I could stay here.”
Hermione nodded. “What are the Dark Knights?”
“They’re like Death Eaters, but they have black cloaks with a green phoenix on the back and a weapon called the Death-Blade. They always wear their hood to cover their faces. Under those hoods are wizards and witches with green reptile eyes, that’s one way to prove that they are Dark Knights. Their eyes are hidden by a spell so they can go around without people learning who they are, but the worst of them all is Daniel, their leader. He is as evil as Voldemort, only he uses Muggle weapons. Hermione, if he gets together with Voldemort, I don’t think anyone can stop him. The reason Dumbledore asked me to help you train is because I was trained in dueling, sword fighting and combat. I also learned a thing or two about Dark Magic. I could help the three of you if you are willing to trust me.” Tawny extended her hand to Hermione.
Hermione stared at her hand for a few seconds before taking it and smiling at her. “I trust you, but it’s going to take awhile to fully trust you though.”
Tawny nodded and had a faint smile on her face. “That’s fine by me, as long as you trust me enough to let me help. Now, about Harry, you need to talk to him. You’re both miserable, and everyone knows it.”
Hermione sighed. “It’s not that simple. Telling Harry how I feel can ruin everything: our friendship and his friendship with Ron. I am willing to ignore my feelings to keep that friendship, it’s more important to me than anything else.”
Tawny put both of her hands on Hermione’s shoulders to make her look at her. “Hermione, one thing that I’ve learned is that you and Harry have a great bond between you and that you two have a lot in common when it comes to talking about your feelings and being stubborn. Talk. To. Him. That’s the one thing between you and Harry. You don’t talk and if you’re going to let that stupid voice inside your head keeping you from you two talking to each other, you’re going to miserable for the rest of your lives!” Tawny shook her gently, getting frustrated by how stubborn Hermione and Harry were being.
Hermione was stunned. This girl that she barely knew was giving her advice about her relationship with Harry, and she was right. Tawny was right about her listening to the little voice in her head telling her that telling Harry about her feelings could ruin everything. She knew Harry broke up with Ginny to keep her safe. Harry could do the same thing to her and she didn’t know if they could still be the great friends they were if they broke up.
She shouldn’t worry about this now. Over time she will talk to Harry, but now they had Horcruxes to find. Helping Harry was her number one thing to do, later they would talk.
Just when Hermione was about to respond, the door opened and Dumbledore walked into the room. “Ah, there you two are. I need both of you to come with me into the library to talk about a few things.” Both girls nodded and followed the Headmaster into the library. Ron and Harry were already there, sitting on the couch.
Harry’s and Hermione’s eyes met for a second before Harry shifted his gaze to Dumbledore. “What did you want to talk about, Professor?”
“I wanted to ask if you three were going back to Hogwarts this year?” the old man inquired.
Harry looked over at Hermione and Ron. He knew Ron would want to be with Luna. It didn’t take a genus to figure out that it was Luna that Ron liked. Hermione had her dreams to be Head Girl and to graduate first in her year. He couldn’t keep her from making her dreams come true just because he needed help with destroying Voldemort.
Turning back to the Headmaster, he said, “we’ll think about it sir. I just need to know if we can search and destroy Horcruxes without our studies getting in the way?”
“Not at all, Harry. If you go back, I will make sure that you are allowed at the library anytime, leave whenever you please and allowed to go to class when you wish.” Dumbledore said, walking over to the old desk and pulling out four envelopes from the desk.
Harry, Ron and Hermione took the letters from him. “Tawny, I believe you are going to Hogwarts this year. That means you will need this letter,” the old wizard handed the letter to the young witch who just looked at the letter in disbelief.
“Tha-Thank you sir,” she said after a minute of just staring at the letter.
Harry smiled at her before asking, “Was there something else you wanted to talk to us about, sir?”
“Yes, there was. Tawny here was trained at a young age for battle, both the Muggle’s and wizard’s way. I wanted to ask you if you are ready to let her train the three of you.”
Harry nodded. “I trust her enough. What about you?”
Ron and Hermione both nodded. “Yes, Harry. We trust her, but I wanted to talk about some other things she could help us with.” Hermione said. She waited for Harry to nod before continuing, “she told me she studied dark magic. She might be able to help us with you-know-what.”
“It is alright to let her know about the Horcruxes Hermione” Dumbledore spoke “it is one of the reason I have let her stay here.”
Harry looked over at Tawny. “Can you really help us with the Horcurxes?”
“Of course. I was trained to know a lot of Dark Magic and objects. I can also help you learn sword fighting, dueling and combat.” Tawny said.
Harry was grinning. It was great news to know that someone could help them train and destroy the Horcruxes. “But what about Hogwarts? What are you going to do, if we decide not to go?”
Tawny chuckled a little. “If you decide not to go, then I’ll stay with you. This is more important than some school work, and about it being dangerous, I think I can handle it. I’ve been through a lot to know that some stupid Death Eaters are not going to stop me.”
“Then it’s settled. You can help us with training, and, Professor, I’ll talk to Ron and Hermione about going back this year,” Harry said with a grin. Dumbledore nodded, letting them know it was okay to leave.
Once outside the office, Tawny faced to trio. “I want you three to meet me in that empty room on the third floor tomorrow at six o‘clock in the morning.”
Harry and Hermione both nodded, but Ron groaned. “That’s too bloody early to get up!” he whined while they walked to the kitchen. Tawny and Harry laughed while Hermione rolled her eyes.
“Umm Hermione, can I talk to you upstairs for a minute?” Harry asked.
“Uh sure, Harry” Hermione said. She followed Harry up the stairs to his room. Tawny followed them with her eyes, a smile forming on her face as the door closed behind them.
Ginny, who was in the kitchen at the moment, asked Tawny, “Where are those two going?”
Tawny just shook her head. “Just to talk,” she answered before she walked into the kitchen with a beaming Ginny behind her.
Harry closed the door when Hermione had entered his room. She walked over to his desk, seeing many Defense Against the Dark Arts books covering the desk, but one that caught her eyes was the album Hagrid had given Harry in his first year.
Harry sat at the edge of the bed, watching Hermione go through the pictures. She stopped at the picture of him, her and Ron in fourth year, standing under the willow tree. Hermione stood between Ron and Harry with their arms around each other’s shoulders. Harry and Ron were making funny face and waving while Hermione was laughing at the two. Harry smiled. That was before the third task when they were taking a walk around the lake; Colin wanted to take a picture of them when they stopped under the tree.
“We were so happy back then,” Hermione whispered, bringing Harry out of his thoughts.
“Yeah, we were, before Voldemort had come back, before the war started. All I had to worry about was me staying alive in the tournament,” he chuckled at the last part. Hermione looked at him with a small smile.
“That’s all we worry about now, isn’t it? Worrying about staying alive, getting through this war.” She took shaky breath. Harry reached out and took her hand, giving it a little squeeze. Hermione looked up at him with teary eyes. “I’m scared, Harry. I’m scared that I’m going to lose you,” she whispered, bowing her head and letting the tears flow down her cheeks.
Harry got off the bed, crouching in front of her and putting his hand under her chin to make her look at him. She looked at him, her beautiful brown eyes full of tears. Harry leaned forward, “you are not going to lose me, Hermione. Even if I die, I’ll always be with you no matter what.” He put his hand on her left cheeks, wiping the tears, “I promise you that I’ll try as hard as I can to kill him and to make sure you are safe. I love you, Hermione” he whispered, looking into her eyes that went wide when he said it. “I always loved you, Hermione. I just hid the feeling for all these years and I don’t regret that kiss.”
Hermione smiled. “You-you love me?” Harry nodded. More tears fell from her eyes as she brought her hand to his hair. “I love you too. I have for a long time. I just never thought you would feel the same way.”
Harry smiled. “Yeah, I thought the same thing. I thought you fancied Ron so I just ignored those feelings. I guess I was wrong in not trusting my heart; instead I trusted my head.”
Hermione laughed. Oh, how Harry loved that laugh. “You thought I fancied Ron? I thought you fancied Ginny. I thought you broke up with her because you wanted to protect her?”
“Yes, I thought you fancied Ron. You made that kind of clear last year and fourth. And I did break up with Ginny to protect her, but also because I don’t feel that way about her like she does me. I couldn’t do that to her, pretending to love her when I love someone else.”
Hermione smiled, pulling him into a hug. “How long?” she asked.
Harry didn’t need to ask her what she was talking about. “Since third year, but probably longer. I just didn’t understand what the feeling was before, but now I think it has been since the day I met you. The first time I saw you, I had this feelings and over the years I knew it was love.”
Hermione pulled away from him. She gazed deeply into his eyes before she started to lean into him. Harry leaned in as well until he felt her lips on his. The kiss was better than the first. There was no one watching, no worrying about the other regretting it. It was full of love and passion.
Harry wrapped his arms around her waist, making the kiss deeper. Hermione felt Harry’s tongue pressing onto her lower lip. Smiling, she opened her mouth as his tongue entered, dancing with hers.
They pulled away after a few second when they needed air. Breathing heavily, they looked into each other’s eyes, seeing nothing but love in them. Harry rested his forehead on Hermione’s, catching his breath. He smiled at her, lowering his head on her neck and whispering into her ear. “I have always loved you, Hermione, and always will.”
Hermione smiled, nuzzling her cheek on his head. “I love you too, Harry, always,” she whispered into his ear.
Harry pulled away from her neck, kissing her again. This time, a light formed when their lips met. Harry’s body was on fire so much he had to pull away, clutching his stomach and moaning in pain. The pain was too much for him. Falling onto his knees, he took deep shaky breaths.
Hermione was by his side on her knees, panicking. “Harry, what’s wrong?”
She grabbed his hand, only to feel the same fire going through her body. Screaming out in pain, she held her stomach. Harry crawled over to her. His hands starting to feel hot. He tried to touch Hermione, but suddenly a red and gold flame burst out of his hands.
The door burst open and Tawny, Ron, Luna and Ginny came into the room, seeing both of them on the ground, Harry’s hands on fire and Hermione holding her stomach. Tawny ran over to them. When she fell on her knees next to them, Hermione’s hand showed flames as well, but they were blue and white.
Tawny’s eyes widened. “Ron! Go get me two potions of Calming Draught and a bucket of water!” Ron nodded and ran out the door with Luna and Ginny behind him. Tawny put all her attention on the two teens on the floor who were still in shock and pain. “Harry, Hermione, just take deep breaths. This will all be over soon,” she said softly, rubbing both Harry’s and Hermione’s backs as they lay on their side, rolled up in a little ball, frightened and in pain from the fire in their hands.
The pain from Harry’s body was starting to fade, but he was too weak to keep his eyes opened. The last thing he saw was Ron, Luna and Ginny running back into the room with the Calming Draught and water along with Mrs. Weasley and Dumbledore before everything went black.
Thank you Potterholic for being my beta, she has really done a great job at checking my mistakes.
Thank you tehcutieEM @TDA for the Chapter Image!
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