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Solo En Ti by slytheringinny
Chapter 1 : Solo En Ti
 
Rating: 15+Chapter Reviews: 11


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Solo En Ti
Only In You
A Song-Fic Using Enrique Iglesias' 'Solo En Ti' by slytheringinny

Disclaimer/Author Notes - The 'Solo En Ti' lyrics belong to the amazing Enrique Iglesias. Be nice. This is my first Sirius/Lily attempt ever.






Se abre una ventana interior
Es una historia de amor
que se ha ido





Flaming red locks of hair spilled over her shoulders elegantly, only hinting at the true beauty the young woman could have shown if she went all out elegant, but she had refused her husband-to-be's protests that she should go the whole way, flaunt what she had and be proud of who had stolen her heart. Emerald eyes stared vacantly into the mirror, gazing not at her reflection, but the reflection of the room behind her. White washed walls, and a couple other girls from her school days sat chatting around a scrubbed wooden table. A bouquet had been pushed into the forest green eyed girl's hands just minutes before she gazed into the mirror, and pearls had been strung around her neck. This felt so odd, it felt so . . . wrong. Why was she marrying him, when her heart clearly denied it?

Lily Evans, soon to be Potter, saw a tear crease down her freckled cheek as she though, but stubbornly ignored it.

Her free fingers reached up, and brushed against the cool pearls that donned her neck. They were her grandmother Evans', her dad's mum. Lily wanted to know if her grandmother had felt this confused, this frantic, upon her wedding day to Grandpa Evans. Probably not. Grandmama probably didn't have secrets she hid from her fiance. Grandmama probably wasn't a scheming little school-girl with a wand that could hex people and erase memories at free will. Grandmama had found her true love; Lily had not. Well, had she?

"Lils, you're looking so somber!" Alice Longbottom chirruped from behind, fixing a brooch that was on her maid of honor, sparkling red dress. "Cheer up, Lily. You look beautiful!" Alice's slightly plump form came behind the slender red-head and reached over Lily's shown shoulder, going up to her cheek and brushing away the lonely tear. Lily couldn't cheer up.

Alice didn't know what was going on inside her trapped mind; Alice didn't know how many abusing thoughts were swirling around her consciousness, causing quivvers in her stomach; Alice didn't know what was making Lily cry.

So she just nodded.

What was wrong with her? This wasn't how it was supposed to be! Sure, James was handsome, and he was downright sweet. But someone, someone more mysterious had caught her fancy much at the same time as James had once he revealed that he wasn't a pigheaded prat. Someone else had shown himself to her.

Someone else.

In marriage, there was no someone else.

There was only supposed to be one.

Todo fue un momento ayer
Y hoy que quiero volver te persigo
Necesito lo que tu me das
Necesito verte un dia mas
Y solo pienso en ti
Solo en ti





Sirius Black. To words that made her heart jump as she watched in her mind's eye the earlier moments of their hidden relationship that made her heart ache with pleasure and guilt at the same time. How could she be like this? Unbeknownst to Alice, everything was spiralling out of control, and she wanted order. She wanted order the way she liked it. But the world had tilted on it's side, everything she once knew by heart spilling out of it's ear.

This wasn't how it was supposed to be with the likes of him.

It wasn't how it was supposed to be, yet it felt so . . . right.

A turnip flew in Lily's ear. "Blast you, Black! One more turnip in places where they don't belong and I'll have you and Potter in detention faster than you can say 'alohamora'!" The shaggy haired boy smiled, blew another turnip that whizzed past Lily's ear, and grinned manically as he spoke.

"Alohamora."

Her cheeks flushed a brilliant pink and she grabbed her vinewood wand from her bag that had been stuffed under the Gryffindor table. "Sirus Black, I swear to Merlin that you will be in a detention dungeon by eight o'clock this Friday night!"

"It's a date." A clever smile spread across the boy's face and Lily's heart thumped. What was wrong with her?! Shoving her want in her robe pocket and checking to make sure none of her books had fallen out during the commotion, Lily gathered her things and raced to McGonagall. This incessant teasing had to be stopped. It was bad enough Potter didn't get anything through his thick skull, now this! With a huff, she reached the head-of-house's office, and the door flew open before she even got to raise her clenched fist to knock.

"Miss Evans? Problem again?"

She bit her lip, entering the stiff office and sitting down on one of the provided straight back chairs. "Yes, Professor."

Taut lips, formed in a frown, and stern hazel eyes looked back at the Head Girl. "Miss Evans, this is the third time this week - can you really handle this position?"

Fear formed in her eyes. Never would she let Sirius Black, nor James Potter, get in her head. "I can handle it, Professor!" Her voice was rushed as she exclaimed. Her fear was pushed away, as annoyance took it's place on her expression. "It's that filthy Black, Professor. . . " And the story was told, McGonagall sitting there with an all knowing, frightening look in her wizened eyes.


Could that incident, have been ways of showing he liked her? Of course, through teasing it wouldn't agitate James as much as say . . . serenading would be.

A term of endearment from Sirius Black - not many could say that happened to them, truly.

Another tear slid iridescently down her cheek.

Why. Why?

Ella ya no cree en el amor
es solo una diversion
un fracaso





Sirius would never risk his relationship with James because of her. James meant too much to him as a friend, James was Sirius' only thing he knew he could count on to be there in the rest of his hopefully long life. Lily knew this; so why get worked up over it? Why? Why even bother to let her feelings get away with her? It was her hormones, she knew it had to have been that. Lily was a logical thinker and that was the only explination that made a possible sense to her in her mind. That was the only reason . . . Blinking, Lily continued to look at her reflection.

Freckles dotted her nose and splayed lightly across her pale cheeks. Her nose was centered perfectly, small and dainty with a scar lightly on the right side of it from when she was three and fell off of her tricycle. Her bright green eyes held an uncertainty that Lily was sure anyone could decipher. Slender fingers played at the hollow of her throat, her lower pink lip shaking slightly with fear and nerves. How could she go on with her wedding looking like this? Feeling such betrayal played with her insides, messed with her emotions.

Did she love James?

With all her heart.

Did she love Sirius?

No. Lust. It was just lust. Right? It was just a bit of that lust that thousands of other girls probably felt for the handsome looking boy of just merely nineteen.

Slowly looking at her form, gazing at the wedding dress that had been in her family for a while, looking at the way it clung to her middle, hiding the slight bulge that would soon be a baby boy, and yet the way it straddled her hips, tight as ever. Form fitting. Perfect. Yet as she continued to look at herself in the mirror with fascination and disbelief, the reflection slowly changed, her mind's eye morphing it.

The shoulders became broader, the hair shortened and became a dark black color, random strands splaying at odd intervals. The eyes darkened and grayed to a hazel colour, the hazel she loved to look into when he was gazing off into space. Her hands became not so small anymore, yet remained slender and long, the nails chewed, like her own. Her dress became a tux and her knees became knobby, her nose wasn't small, but rather now long and thin. Her cheekbones went a bit higher, and before her stood the picture of the man she loved - the man she planned to marry with a cheeky half-smirk on his face.

Lily blinked again and the picture of beloved James Potter disappeared, and momentarily her mind replaced it with the image of the distraction. The one that distracted her from the fights she and James held. The one who often came to the rescue.

Sirius.

Why?

Lily would just try to convince herself he was just a distraction.

Nothing more.

Todo junto a ella es fingir
Y siento ganas de huir
A tus brazos
Necesito lo que tu me das
Necesito verte un dia mas
Y solo pienso en ti
Solo en ti





The ceremony couldn't take any longer, Lily mused as she stood there after they had said their wills, and Lily had looked into James' eyes with a smile on her face, hiding what she knew - what she had felt in the past. She felt so guilty for feeling so betrayed, for even considering liking Sirius - yet she couldn't help it. It was like a second nature, it was just on the dot, a second reaction. The ring was slid onto her slender finger with ease, and adjusted with the black haired teenager's light touch. The people clapped, and Lily felt tears spark her defiant eyes.

She told herself she wouldn't cry. Yet here she was. Crying. It was half because she was happy, half because she was sad. She needed to tell him the truth, but how could she? So in silence, Lily Potter sat next to her new husband, holding his hand and feeling the cool metal of the new rings against their skin. He lightly swung their conjoined fingers between the chair, giving her glances that filled her stomach with pain at his naive happiness. A priest stood, Muggle of course - Lily insisted they go traditional for her non-wizard parents, who were becoming ill anyway and barely understood normal Muggle things, talking about the wonders of marriage, about how it was one partner for life, like conjoined twins.

Always together; never apart. In sickness and in health, to death do they part.

A lump formed in her throat and her bright, watery eyes wandered down the table to James' right, where Sirius black stood with a smirk on his face, his mind probably reelling him the thought of "Good job mate. You finally got what you wanted all your life." He looked seemingly happy, until he caught Lily's concerned, saddened gaze. Sirius' face fell and he gave a half hearted smile.

Lily returned it thoughtfully, though it wasn't a real smile.

It would never be for real.

Her heart wouldn't let her do anything to betray James now. It belonged to him and him alone. Always together; never apart. In sickness and in health, to death do they part.  But how could she go on, until do they part, if James didn't know how Lily was habouring things she could have never thought up of? Maybe it was just a strong friendship - and that's what she could tell James?

No.

She would never lie to him.

She just wanted to retreat. Go into his arms.

Who that his was exactly, she didn't know.

Va pasando el tiempo y no se
De lo que fue aquella vez
Que ha quedado?

Te habras olvidado de mi
Mientras yo vivo por ti
Obsesionado?





She shook her head and retracted her gaze from the dark haired man sitting next to her husband's side as a best man, grinning polietly as the priest continued on about doves now (bloody old man rambled too much) and sniffed, blinking and feeling James' concerned gaze on her face and his finger coasting up to the corner of her eye to wipe away the stray tear that had reached past her barrier of emotions.

Could she call herself obsessed?

Maybe.

Finally, the priest was done. Lily recognized this as the man went down to sit at his own table, bible open and his mouth moving silently, and the lights dimmed. Something about the couple and a dance to themselves reached Lily's unfocused ears and she felt James tug on her hand, crashing her down to reality. Forest green orbs widened and she gave him a smile, looking up at hazel ones seperated by that long slender nose. Lily rose from her seat, nearly tripping over the edge of her bridal dress, smiling nervously for everyone to see.

Normally, Lily was so confident. What had happened to the girl who could never be so wrong? Did turning nineteen and getting engaged change her? Did getting one week away from the marriage date worry her? Maybe it was the fact that she had finally gotten married, tied down, that had changed her ways? What happened to that confidence that had resided in her soul; her very heart?

Gone.

Replaced with obsession and paranoia.

The wooden floor clicked beneath her heels and she kicked them off, feeling James' fingertips against the palm of her hand, dancing their own beat on them. She spun onto the parque floor and felt eyes on the back of her sweat covered neck. James Potter towered before her and she gave out her best smile, white teeth glistening happily, putting on a fantastic facade. It was one pair of eyes that disturbed her, and as the music started up and James took her waist in his once-school-day-perverted hands and twirled her gently, her head laying on his chest, she found those eyes.

Sirius.

They held a bit of fire, but he smiled and clapped happily for his friend, a broad smile on his own face. Remus sat next to him, an unmistakably identical smile on his own more elderly face. A streak of gray was still noticable in his sleeked blond hair. Poor man. But that wasn't what Lily was supposed to be doing, she realized as her heart beat a furious tattoo against her chest, so loudly that she was sure her lover was bound to hear it.

She had to tell him.

She had to.

Necesito lo que tu me das
Necesito verte un dia mas
Y solo pienso en ti
Solo en ti





"Lily," His soft voice broke the silence that had settled both in the air and in Lily's head as all thoughts were turned off at the end of the dance. "Is something wrong, love?" His voice was etched deep with concern, and it broke the red-headed woman's heart to know that  she was hiding something from him. Something he didn't know about his best friend. She looked up and opened her eyes, the pearl neckless twisted the wrong way around her throat. Her eyes locked upon his and she realized that her heelless feet were stationary now. The room had stopped spinning, they had stopped moving, and other couples were dancing and twirling merrily, some clapping as they came onto the dance floor.

She had to lie.

She couldn't do it.

Not now.

Lily'd ruin it all.

"No," Her voice cracked, her eyes welled and he frowned, the expression tainting his now handsome face in the dim, dim light.

His slender hands dropped from her waist, breifly touching the lacy material stretched around her stomach, and then gripping her hands in his own, once again the cool feeling of the ring startling her. "Lily - don't play games with me? Are you upset?" His expression nearly tore her frantic heart in more pieces. He knew something was wrong, and he was afraid he did it. "Did we move too fast? Did we, did I - "

Lily shook her head violently, red curls spilling haphazardly onto her shoulders. "James. It's . . . nothing. Nothing I can't take care of. You didn't do anything, James. You did everything right." She offered him a smile, and he took it, though he wasn't convinced enough. He'd come back for an answer. Sirius sat on the sidelines now, drinking a whiskey that was placed on the table, experimenting with Muggle alcoholic beverages. He licked his lips and Lily turned her gaze back to her husband, letting their hands drop. She bent down and picked up her white heals.

"James. My feet are tired and I'm a bit thirsty, can I sit this one out?" A slight pout formed on her face and he nodded, but wanted to rush to the Super-James rescue.

"Can I get you your drink, Lils - "

"No, love." Tip-toes were raised and she applied a light and knowing kiss on his forehead. His cheeks flushed. Public displays of affection would be daily now. The teenaged mind came back and whispered a 'yes!' in his head enthusiastically. "I'll be fine, James. I promise."

Her feet led her somewhere she wasn't expecting. . .

Todo fue un momento ayer
Y hoy que quiero volver te persigo
Necesito lo que tu me das
Necesito verte un dia mas
Y solo pienso en ti
Solo en ti





Right next to Sirius.
Solo en ti

Author Note - This was quite a challenge for me, both the Sirius/Lily ship, and the fact that the lyrics were in Spanish and I had to adapt to make it work. Thanks JolieFillie, for giving me my fanfic muse back.

Here's the lyrics in English, in order of the stanzas.


An interior window is opened
It is a history of love
that has gone away

Everything was a moment yesterday
And today that I want to turn I chase you
I need what you give to me
I need to see you one more day
And alone fodder in you
Only in you

She does not believe already in the love
a diversion alone
a defeat

Everything along with her is to pretend
And I feel desire to flee
To your arms
I need what you give to me
I need to see you one more day
And alone fodder in you
Only in you

The time is happening and not
of what it was that time
what has stayed?

you will have forgotten me
Meanwhile I live for you
Obsessed?

I need what you give to me
I need to see you one more day
And alone fodder in you
Only in you





There you go, and thanks for reading! Take a minute, and tell me how to improve, do's and do not's, or just comments. It only takes a while -prods little box below-

♥Ginni





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