DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter. If I did, this would not be the end ofThe Life Dissertation of Lovette Luclare.
Well, this has been an awesome run!
Thanks to everyone who supported me for my first series.
I love you guys.
Especially to my reviewers and banner-makers, you guys rock.
Be on the lookout for theContinuationof this story.
Part two, really.
Yes, children, it doesn’t end here.
And yes, I am crying right now.
I really did love this story.
Weeks passed since Lovette’s incident with her Potions N.E.W.T....in fact, the N.E.W.T.s were completely over. And yes, Lovette had served her detention, or rather, detentions for her disruption. Interrupting a life-deciding test had cost two nights of scrubbing the dungeon floor.
But now, Lovette was packing her things for the trip home on the Hogwarts Express. The school year had finally finished, the end of the year feast the night before and now everyone was getting last minute packing done. Though not without some nostalgia contaminating the ambiance.
“Do you remember-?”
“Brenna, don’t start.” Lily caught Brenna before she could recall another priceless memory from their school careers at Hogwarts and bring them all to tears. Yes, there had already been several slight collapses in the Seventh Year Girl’s Dormitory.
Brenna did not protest at being cut off. Truth be told, she really didn’t want to reminisce quite yet (she planned on retelling those stories when she and the girls were forcing their great-grandchildren to listen to the ramblings of a bunch of old ladies). Really, Brenna was just trying to ease the miserable tension that had ensued between the girls in her dorm.
“COME ON LADIES, THE TRAIN’S LEAVING IN TWENTY MINTUES!” Sirius’ slightly irritated tone echoed from the bottom of the spiral stairs leading to the Gryffindor Common. Either he and the guys were not upset about leaving the place they’d called home for the past seven years, or they tried to stay strong for their girls‘ sake, lest they have complete emotional breakdowns.
Lovette sighed, standing up from where she had been sitting on her trunk to get it shut and met the gloomy stares of Lily and Brenna.
“Ready?” Lovette asked, her voice quiet. Lily and Brenna exchanged glances and nodded, frowns adorning their faces.
The girls had difficulty lifting their trunks and owl cages off the ground, but eventually conquered the task and made their way to the door leading to the stair. Their eyes scanned the room for one last check to see if they’d left anything and to take a mental picture of what their beloved dormitory looked like for the last time.
Lily, Lovette and Brenna stopped before exiting the room and glanced at it one more time, almost with a sense of longing.
“Well ladies,” Lovette started, her voice breaking the silence. Her voice sounded as though she were trying to keep if from cracking, “let’s go to our future.”
And they left the confines of their adolescent bedroom, one last time.
“Are you okay?” Sirius’ soft voice broke Lovette’s thoughts as she made her way down the grand staircases of Hogwarts. Her friends were leading dismally ahead of her, feeling the same as Lovette did.
“No.” Lovette answered rather frankly as she habitually skipped a trick step, “No, I’m not okay. At least not right now. But...I will be. I promise. I’ll be okay.” Sirius smiled sympathetically, wrapping his free arm (the other had a firm hold of his trunk) around Lovette’s waist.
“It’ll be okay.”
“I hope so.”
“I know so.”
Far too soon for her liking, Lovette found herself walking outside the walls of Hogwarts into the courtyard. It was strange, as she looked behind her for one final glance at the castle, how Hogwarts had been so important to her. Within its walls, some many things had happened to her...too many to count. In the very courtyard she was passing through, she had shared her first kiss with Sirius. It was odd to her how one castle could hold so many memories.
Salt from building tears burned her eyes as Lovette continued to stare at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry from over her shoulder. Hogwarts had not been just a school, it had been her home. The shell that kept her from the outside world, life, for so many years. And even though Hogwarts had been training her to take on the world, she still couldn’t help but feel...helpless. There were no such things as first years in the real world.
The tears had already begun falling by the time Lovette had made it to the Hogwarts Express, billowing pure white steam and packed with students eager to get home for their summer vacation.
As she stepped onto the train with the rest of her friends (Hestia had joined them at the Entrance Hall), Lovette noticed the tears flowing down the cheeks of Lily, Brenna and Hestia. This only made the trails of tears on Lovette’s face flow even more.
Lovette sat by the window seat after discarding her trunk and owl cage in the compartment, as she had been doing for so long. Sirius had taken a seat next to her as her other friends followed in suit and crammed into the compartment.
But, Lovette had been so entranced at the view of Hogwarts from her window seat, she barely noticed Sirius taking her hand in his and holding it firmly. Nothing at this point could comfort her. Not even him. She was leaving her home.
“Exploding Snap anyone?” A soft murmur of ‘no’s chorused at Peter’s suggestion. Apparently, everyone was feeling the same sentiments as Lovette.
Slowly but surely, the Hogwarts Express pulled out of the Hogsmeade station, beginning the journey back to London. The only sound audible was the chugging of the engine and the slight screeches as the train’s wheels quicken their pace on the track. It didn’t even sound as though anyone were breathing.
Before she could comprehend how it had happened so quickly, night had fallen on Lovette and the rest of the travelers on the Hogwarts Express as their voyage came to a end. Lovette could spot the approaching city lights of London as the drew nearer to Platform 9 ¾ . She sighed, leaning her head against the glass, causing her glasses to sit askew on her face.
“I love you.” Sirius’ quiet voice drifted into her ear as Lovette continued to gaze out of the window.
“Love you too.” Lovette mumbled, not looking at him but squeezing his hand in recognition. She could almost feel Sirius’ sad smile.
The train eventually came to a screeching halt as it entered the familiar surroundings of Platform 9 ¾. How had the time flown so quickly?
Taking their time, the eight friends retrieved their trunks from the overhead nets and secured their owls or other pets with them. They didn’t see any reason to rush.
“Let’s go, Love.” Sirius’ voice yet again interrupted Lovette’s silent world as she made another glance of the compartment. How long would it be before she was back on this train? Probably never.
“Yeah...” She muttered in response, letting Sirius guide her out of the compartment after the rest of her friends.
The chatter of excited parents and students met her ears as Lovette finally made it towards the door exiting out of the train. Sirius had already gotten off the train, but Lovette stood still, watching everyone else. She gazed at her friends as they stayed together, morose expressions on their faces.
Suddenly, Lovette found herself crying. Not loud, heart-wrenching sobs, but silent rivulets of tears, leaking down her porcelain face.
Sirius took Lovette’s hand again, encouraging her to step off of the train. Lovette inhaled deeply, closing her eyes for a moment. Why was this so difficult?
But she knew exactly why it was difficult to get off that train.
Because once her foot hit the concrete of Platform 9 ¾, she knew her childhood would end.
With one tiny step, she’d be taking her first stride into adulthood.
And although Lovette had been waiting for her life to begin, she knew another one was ending.
She realized that she didn’t want to grow up.
Not because she wanted to stay a child forever.
But because she couldn’t help but feel a dark sense of foreboding of her life ahead.
And she did not like it.
Almost twenty-three years later, Lovette could still feel that knot in her chest that made her keep her feet planted on that train. She could remember the foreshadowing that crept into her mind, keeping her from wanting to grow up. But once Lovette had exited the train, she assured herself that everything would be alright. It would, wouldn’t it?
Still, twenty-three years later, Lovette wished she had not gotten off the Hogwarts Express.
“Why was I so stupid?” Lovette closed the notebook in which she had written her whole seventh year at Hogwarts.
She didn’t cry anymore about it. She used to. But, it seemed as though it made no sense to cry...you couldn’t change the past. Now, she felt a sense of regret...and this little voice inside her head berating the choices she had made.
The choices Lovette had made...they couldn’t be changed...some were stupid, others were...well, really stupid.
But, nonetheless, those choices had gotten Lovette Luclare to where she now was. Lying on her bed at five in the morning after writing a novel about her seventh year at school, living alone, with her fiancée gone. It was only natural Lovette thought her past choices rather foolish.
“It didn’t stop there...” Lovette’s voice cut through the silence that always ensued in her house. Living alone meant you were alone. She had not lover or friends...at least none that she wanted to see. No, she couldn’t face her friends after that.
But, Lovette was right. Her life hadn’t stopped as soon as she had gotten off of the Hogwarts Express. No...it had really began. There was still a whole other half of the story that had landed her where she was.
The story didn’t end there.
So, lifting herself off her bed with much difficulty from lack of sleep (it had taken her all night to write her “novel”), Lovette went in search for another notebook. A bigger one this time. Yes...it would certainly take longer than the last dissertation.
And so, finding a blank navy blue notebook and black pen, she resumed her place on her bed.
Inhaling deeply, Lovette pried open the notebook, becoming intoxicated with the sweet scent of new pages to fill.
“Alright....so, let’s continue the chronicles...”
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