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When the only person you can trust is someone you shouldn't by manic_rage
Chapter 2 : Bathroom Fun....Enter Her
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 3

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By the time they got to the castle, Hermione was bored and needed something to do to keep her mind off of things, like a nice bath, or loud music, anything.

As everyone settled down and the first years were lined up, Hermione sat at the end of her table, ignoring everyone and everything, except the burning in her back, which is only caused by someone staring.

She didn’t have to turn around to know it was Malfoy, he did it the rest of the train ride, and as they entered the castle, it was starting to get on her nerves.

After the sorting, Dumbledore looked to the two head’s tables and signaled for them to stand.

“To out heads this year, Ms Hermione Granger, and Mr. Draco Malfoy. Good luck to you and everyone else.” He said, waving his hand, the food appearing.

Hermione did not eat as she waited for the feast to end, so she could get to her dorm and distract herself.

Dinner ended not soon enough for Hermione, who stayed behind as well as Draco as they waited for Dumbledore, and oddly enough, Snape.

“We’ll show you to your new dorm.” said Dumbledore and they followed him, Malfoy and Snape talking in low voices as they came to a painting of Guinevere.

“Hello white lady, will you let us in?”


“Trust.” Said Dumbledore and the painting disappeared, now where is once was a door way.

They walked in, and even Malfoy was surprised. It was a huge room, larger then a classroom, even two of them together.

It had a small living room, kitchen and even a library that reminded Hermione of Beauty and the Beast, and how the books went on forever.

“To the left is your dorm Hermione, and Draco, yours is to the right.”

“What about the bathroom?” asked Hermione and Dumbledore pointed to the door that was between their bedrooms.

“Anything else?” asked Dumbledore and they shook their heads.

“Draco, I may have a word with you?” asked Dumbledore and Draco nodded as Snape took Hermione to a corner of the room.

“I unfortunately have the displeasure of escorting you on the thirteenth Ms Granger. So try and make it quick.”

“Sir, if I could I would skip it, but then what good would it do any of us?” she asked and he looked at her; he knew what she was doing, he did similar things in his youth, but no matter what he could not let his guard down.

“Then we are understood.” he said walking out without another word, Dumbledore walked out, wishing them both a goodnight.

Hermione looked around for a moment and headed towards the bathroom.

“I call the bathroom.” she said walking in and slamming the door behind her before Malfoy could say anything.

She locked the door as she peeled her clothes off, pinning the rest of her hair back.

She looked at herself for a moment, adorning the fierce looking lion encircled in an unknown language to the tattoo artists.

It was one of the most painful things she had ever done in her life, but she didn’t mind, it distracted her.

Hermione turned the water on and allowed the room to fill with steam, as she tried to think of a way to conjure a boom box.

Finally she had it and waved her wand, a boom box appearing on the shelve next to the tub. She quickly looked at it, thinking about what she wanted to listen to.

Finally she found it.

An American song she fell in love with that summer. Before the first word was even sung, she blasted it, smiling as she slipped into the water.


Break me down
You got a lovely face
We're going to your place
And now you got to freak me out
Scream so loud
Getting fucking laid
You want me to stay
But I got to make my way

You're a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good I'm on top of it
When I dream
I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

You're a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good I'm on top of it
When I dream
I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

Take it off
The paper is your game
You jump in bed with fame
Another one night paid in full
You're so fine
It won't be a loss
Cashing in the rocks
Just to get you face to face

You're a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good I'm on top of it
When I dream
I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

You're a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good I'm on top of it
When I dream
I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

Get the video
Fuck you so good
Get the video
Fuck you so good

Crazy bitch
Crazy bitch
Crazy... bitch

You're a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good I'm on top of it
When I dream
I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back
Come on!

Baby girl
You want it all
To be a star you'll have to go down
Take it off
No need to talk
You're crazy but I like the way you fuck me!

You're a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good I'm on top of it
When I dream
I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

You're a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good I'm on top of it
When I dream
I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

You keep me right on
You're crazy but I like the way you fuck me!

As Hermione lay in the tub soaking, she ignored the banging on her door from Malfoy, she knew he was trying to protest against the noise, but he was going to have to put up with it for another twenty minutes, because she was not done yet.

Finally Malfoy gave up and she got out of the bath, tying a robe tightly around her as she walked out and right into Malfoy. He had been waiting there the entire time.

“I was knocking.”

“I am aware of that.”

“You know it is only courteous to answer, especially when you are sharing it with someone.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” She said as she tried to walk away, but he grabbed her arm.

“Nice song.”

“Crazy Bitch. Buckcherry. Wonderful American muggle band.” she said pulling free as she walked away.

When she walked into her room she did not even take in the beauty, she simply grabbed her sleepless draught, drank it and allowed the covers to engulf her.

Hermione awoke in the morning, still shaking from the nights dreams. She groggily walked into the bathroom and took off her robe.

She walked over to the shower and opened the curtain, only to be greeted with a naked Malfoy.

“Great, just what I need to start my day.” She said yawning as she closed the curtain and grabbed her robe off the floor, putting it back on.

Leaving a very shocked and confused Malfoy in the shower. Hermione decided to skip a shower that morning and threw her hair up in a bun of curly mass.

She got dressed and went down to the Great Hall, where others like herself were barely awake.

For most of her summer, Hermione did not go to bed until four in the morning and did not get up until one in the afternoon.

School was now hell. She thought as she went and sat down, Harry, Ron and Ginny not sitting too far from her.

“How was your morning Hermione?” asked Ginny and Hermione looked up at her, yawning.

“Saw Malfoy naked in the shower.” she said, both boys dropping their jaws, either of them able to say anything for a moment.

“WHAT!” belted out Ron, several people looking at him.

“Doesn’t matter. I now know, mornings showers belong to him.” She said as he walked in, looking at her as he sat down.

“Is that all Hermione?” asked Ginny and she nodded as McG came around with schedules.

This year Hermione was taking a download, three classes and independent classes.

That was it for Miss Book Worm. Potions, DADA and Transfiguration, everything else she could do on her own, or at least that is Dumbledore told her the last time they discussed her schedule.

Next came the mail. Hundreds of owls flying in and out, dropping of letters in front of students. One fell in front of Hermione, then another and another until she had about ten in front of her.

“Look whose popular.” said Lavender Brown, one of her brainless counterparts nodding.

Harry, Ron, Ginny and Malfoy looked at Hermione as she slipped several of the letters into her bag, two of them she kept out and opened.

Yo sister Hey sister!

How boring of you to be in boarding school. I know I said it would suit

you to be there, but now I am bored when Hindi is at work. No one to play with, and I

am not getting a cat. Cats are for crazy women. No sir that is not me. Wish you could

come back for a while, besides the you know. Anyways, how is everything the first 


Anyone get hot over the summer? Get fat? Come on I need some gossip about 

people I don’t even know. But really Ray. Please tell me how your doing? I know this 

summer was crazy, but we never really talked. 

All my gangster love,

Your sister from another father,

Your yin to you yang



Hermione smiled slightly at the letter and slipped it into her bag and opened the next one, chuckling at the curving handwriting.

Ray - Ray

Get your narrow behind back here. Millie is driving me up the wall. Work can’t even 

keep her away, its like she’s everywhere. And you should have seen her face when I 

suggested a cat or something. I mean what is so wrong with a bloody cat? it’s a 


Should I have said a dog? Maybe a mouse. 

Help me out here brains. Should I get her pregnant? 

Do you think a baby would keep her busy long enough for me to got to poker night? 

Lord help me that I love her, but by god. 

Anyways, how’s school? 



Total drag and want to shoot it up?

I got a gun. And as I always say, you are more then welcome to use it. But I guess 

your stick is more effective. But come on, a gun is cool. Bang, bang. Anyways dearest 

Ray-Ray. I must go. She doesn’t know I am writing to you, complaining, and if she 

asks, you know the drill. Repeat with me. ‘What beer?’ That is all that you need to say.

Love you kid and I pray you come to Christmas, or I might kill myself, or get her pregnant.

Peace be with you brains


Everyone in the Great Hall could hear Hermione laughing, then say the words, ‘Whatbeer?’

“So, who’s the letters from Hermione?” asked Ginny and Hermione looked at her, holding back more laughter.
“My cousin Millie and her boyfriend.”

“Oh, that’s cool.”

“Yeah.” she said as she folded up the letter, a loud noise outside of the doors. All of a sudden they burst open and there was a girl, yelling at someone.

“Piss off ass hole, the muffin shop is closed, no more muffin for you.” She yelled, only to turn around and have the entire Great Hall staring at her.

“This is so not where I parked my car.” She said as she looked around, a fag in her hand.

Dumbledore called for everyone’s attention as several teachers ran towards her, and as they did she pulled out a gun.

“Ha, ha. Casey this is really funny, but enough is enough.” she called over her shoulder, no one coming.

“Right. So I didn’t see you and you guys just pretend you never saw me, and no one calls the cops.” she said backing up, right into the doors.

“Those weren’t closed a second ago. Wait, is this some kind of cult. Do you get naked, because hey if you do I guess I don’t have to go yet.” She said as Dumbledore walked up to her, looking into her eyes.

“Does no one else see Gandalf in this fellow?” she asked and when no one said anything she nodded.

“Are you going to let me leave?”

“Who are you?”

“Now see, telling you would be a bad thing. Cause then I would have to get ride of all of the witnesses and there is a lot of them, and I am sure my gun doesn’t hold that many.” She said as Snape came up to her side, as if he knew her.

“Pale man, slide me some skin soul brother.” she said holding out her hand that did not have the gun, and Snape did a soul hand shake with her, taking her gun at the same time.

“Oh come on, that’s my favorite one.”

“Headmaster, I unfortunately know this girl. Come on Wednesday.”

“Why?” She asked looking at him, and he gave her this sort of glare which only made her smile.

“Ok. Only because you are asking so nicely.” She said looking at him, turning towards the doors, then back to him.

“But I get my gun back.” She said as she walked out, Snape following her as Dumbledore turned to the hall.

“I am very sorry students, there was a misunderstanding. Will the heads please come with me.” he said, Hermione and Malfoy standing instantly and following Dumbledore.

“Sir, what is going on?”

“We’ll have to ask Professor Snape that.” he said as they walked into Dumbledore’s office, they all could hear yelling.

“It was totally irresponsible to bring Casey here and you know it.”

“It was an accident, we were fighting and I grabbed the portkey to bolt and he grabbed on with me.”

“Is he still here?”

“Hell no, I threw it at him and he went away, hopefully to the Gobi desert that cheating bastard.” She said coldly and Snape looked at her, still shaking his head.

“And where do I continue? You were suppose to be here yesterday.”

“This is what happens when you leave me to my own devices.” she said, giving him a look much like his own. Dumbledore turned to his students and smiled.

“Oh. Servrus, you never did say that you daughter was going to join us.”

“In my last attempt to keep her safe.”

“Safe. There you go with that blasted word again. Nothing is safe, it’s a planet inhabited by humans with gun. By the way I want my gun back.”



“Wait, hold on. You have a daughter?” asked Malfoy and Snape nodded, Wednesday looking at him.

“Oh, him. The Malfoy kid. So am I stuck here?”

“YES!” Yelled Snape and she looked at him, laughing.

“Dude, calm down. All I did was ask a fucking question. Don’t get your knickers in a twist, dad.” she said, laughing at the last part, Snape’s face turning green.

“I told you not to call me that.”

“And I asked for my gun back.” she said as she looked at him and he handed her her gun. She smiled as she looked over to Malfoy and Hermione.

“So why are they here?” She asked and Dumbledore took over.

“These are the heads of the school.”

“Not that one.” she said pointing to Hermione, studying her face.

“Yes. Ms. Granger is one of the best students in the school.”

“Apparently whitey here doesn’t boast much. I’ve already taken my NEWTS, and passed them all. Reason one why I don’t need to be here.”

“Reason two?” asked Dumbledore and she smiled.

“No offense, but this is a school. And Snape here promised that if I passed everything on private study, I wouldn’t have to go to school.”

“I don’t remember that.” said Snape and she glared at him.

“Damn it, well I hope you have insurance, this place looks like fun.”

“So you want to get caught?”

“Half of the fun. The rest is getting away. The first part is entrapping them. God I miss my job.” She said and Snape looked at her warningly as Dumbledore asked her,

“What job?”

“Ends and pieces.” She said as she looked at Hermione and Malfoy, then to Snape.

“So what am I suppose to be doing here, exactly? Because if I can get away with hanging in the library and on the grounds, I’ll be happy.”

“Unfortunately, you don’t get to be happy.” said Snape and she looked at him, sighing.

“Whenever am I happy and with you at the same time?” she asked as she looked at Dumbledore, looking into his eyes.

“I would really like it if I didn’t have to go to some of the classes.” Dumbledore looked at her for a moment and them nodded.

“I have a small job if you are willing to take it. I would like to talk more in depths about it in my office.”

“No problem. Yo daddy-o. I’ll catch you later. Heads, nice to meet you.” She said as she walked away with Dumbledore, both of the talking in hushed voices.

Snape turned to the heads, his face neutral.

“I would like to ask that you keep the knowledge you have learned to yourselves. Wednesday is in a lot of trouble right now with a lot of different people.
Most of them could find her here. I ask this for her sake.” He said looking at them, both of them nodding without hesitation.

“Sir if I may ask one question.”

“You may, I also may not answer it.”

“Who is her mother?” Asked Malfoy and Snape shook his head.

“That is my business. Now I advise that you two get to class before you are late.” He said walking off, his robes moving dramatically behind him.

Of course he knew they were going to be late, they were in his first class of the morning. Malfoy looked at Hermione, then to the schedule in her hands.

“What class do you have first?”


“Great.” he said as they made their way to the dudgeons, walking next to each other but never saying anything. 

[A/N: The song is ‘Crazy Bitch’ By Buckcherry. I love that song. Hope you like it. Banner needed. And the 'piss off asshole....' part is from Saved!  Good move.  Couldn't resist.]

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