Well. School has started again. But this guide isn’t about school, or the mediocre feast, or the Slytherin’s pudding blowing up mysteriously, it’s a guide to the Marauders, so I am not going to go into something that doesn’t matter, because the whole purpose of this bloody guide is to teach ladies like myself how to deal with boys ... these boys in particular.
Maybe this will end up more like a diary. You don’t mind, right?
Like you have a choice.
Okay. This morning. The first day of classes.
I was still feeling a little of the Ryan Bell Blues, but hey, obviously he didn’t like me that much anyway, right? Mhm. He was stupid, but I couldn’t help still liking him, even if it was just a little bit.
The major event of the morning was sharing a bathroom with Lily Evans, queen of rude remarks and overly done lip gloss. Stubborn too. It was not a pleasant experience.
“Move Sterling,” she said as she pushed for the mirror.
“No Evans, you already have enough makeup on to pass as a clown. It’s my turn.”
She scowled and moved over a millimeter. I took it as a good sign.
We shared the bathroom in silence, being the last two to leave. But then something not exactly good happened.
Bonnie, my lovely, faithful cat, decided to attack her. She walked out of the bathroom, hair combed so sleek and shiny I was jealous, and my cat jumps down from somewhere and lands on her head, trying to claw her eyes out.
She yelled and shrieked so loud I am sure she awoke the Mandrakes, and by the time I yanked Bonnie off of her, her amazing hair was ruined and she had a claw mark on her face.
“Sterling, you’ll be sorry.”
“Evans! Uh- Lily! I didn’t know, Bonnie just doesn’t like some people, she doesn’t like Peter either ... sorry!” She was seriously fuming. Secretly, I praised Bonnie.
Some people really like Lily Evans. Actually, a lot of people do. But, from day one, we just never got along, and somehow, I think I accidentally spilled something on her homework, and ever since she just has been horrible to me. She is nice to the Slytherins and not me. Something just doesn’t add up, I guess.
Whatever. You know the saying, bitches, they come and they go.
I followed a fuming Lily Evans down to breakfast, as she angrily slammed her books on the table and explained to her friends in a disgusted voice how much she hated me. As her bitchy friends looked up the table at me I waved and smiled.
“Don’t talk to me Emmeline; I’m trying to be fake.”
She chuckled and took a forkful of James’ pancakes. “Blek, how much syrup did you put on these?” she exclaimed as she swallowed.
“You know you like my pancakes.” Sirius snorted into his pumpkin juice.
“Then what of mine do you like?” he joked.
“Well,” she said as she took a bite of his bacon, “that wasn’t so bad.”
He laughed as I focused back on my empty plate and what I was going to fill it with, the possibilities and combinations are endless, you know.
“What’s up Cara?” James asked as he put a stack of pancakes on my empty plate. I guess he picked for me.
“Bonnie attacked Lily this morning,” I said dully.
Everyone howled with laughter. “What’s so bad about that?” Peter asked.
“She is going to find a cruel and creative way of getting back at me,” I said simply.
“But it’s not like you ordered your cat to attack her,” Emmeline said as she continued to sample everyone’s food.
“1. She doesn’t know that, and 2. She knows how disappointed I am that I didn’t.”
“Very true, my friend, very true.”
“STOP EATING MY FOOD!” I shrieked as she laughed and set down her fork.
As Emmeline sat there, quiet, for once, Fabian Prewett walked by and her shoulders visibly sagged. I knew she liked him- she had for so long. The stunning mischief maker was all too irresistible, but redheads are not my thing.
“Hey Vance,” he said with a nod.
“Morning Prewett,” she said, trying and succeeding to stay calm. He kept walking, and none of the stupid boys seemed to have noticed anything; they were immersed in Quidditch talk, but I knew this was going to be the highlight of dear Emmy’s day.
James looked up from the table across from me. Why did he seem so attractive all of the sudden? Why hadn’t I noticed this before? Was he always so yummy?
DUH. That's why 99.9 % of the female student body wants to date him!
“Cara, you’re going out for the team, aren’t you?”
I am a Seeker; I am the best Seeker ever. Everyone knows it, I am just absolutely brilliant. Uncoordinated on land, but on a broom I am a little better.
The bell rang, signaling classes and James walked beside me, like every morning, so why the bloody hell was I getting fluttery sensations everytime he said my name? Caaaa-raaa. He had said it a thousand times. And it had never had such an effect on me.
We took our seats in Transfiguration, taking up a whole row, and I was nestled in between James and Emmeline, as always. Professor McGonagall started her long and uninteresting speech on the importance of our O.W.L’S.
I embellished a heart on the corner of my parchment over and over until giggling amongst the student body made me look up.
Evans and Meadowes were going into fits of laughter over something.
“Miss Evans! I am appalled; you are normally much more respectful then this,” Professor McGonagall snapped, “is there something you would like to share with us?”
“Er, sure Professor. Dorcas and I were just talking about how much of a cow Sterling is,” Lily said coolly, “you would agree with us, wouldn’t you?”
The class rippled with laughter as I slammed my quill down and James’ hand jumped to mine to calm me down. He squeezed it gently until I lowered my wand from under the table.
“Well Evans, we all know I am not nearly as much of a cow as you are.”
“Miss Evans, Miss Sterling! I do not know who you both think you are, and rest assured the next time you show so much disrespect you will me punished.”
James squeezed my hand again until the tension in my body eased and I almost let myself sink back into my stupor.
A couple periods later, at lunch, I was still steaming.
“Honestly, you would think she would at least have the decency to be original,” I seethed, “A cow? She sleeps in the same room as me and has for five years. You would think she would be smart enough to come up with something original!”
Remus chuckled. “It’s Evans, as in Lily Evans. We don’t care about her, remember?”
“Yeah, I know but seriously, in front of the whole class? No one saw her get beat up by my cat!”
“I will never get over the fact that I missed that.” Emmeline said, giggling softly as she took ham off of Sirius’ plate.
“Do you ever get your own food?”
“Never,” she said with a cheeky grin as she took a biscuit off of James’ plate.
James put a massive potato on my plate. “Unlike this one,” he said, nodding to Emmeline, “you my love, have not eaten much today.”
“Eh. I can’t eat with Slughorn next, I may vomit all over the dungeons.”
“Could you? That would buy us some time,” Peter said. I laughed.
“Not today. I’ll save that for exam day.”
He put food on my plate! I was still tittering from him caring. CARA WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? Stop saying that. He has always done these things; you’re just ... more...observant today. Yes, and maybe you’re a little over-hormonal, but that’s it. Relax, Sterling, you don’t like him, you ... can’t.
After an uneventful Potions and an exceedingly dull Double- History of Magic snooze fest, us six teenagers were even more rowdy on the way back to the Common Room then usual.
As I was laughing at something Remus had said, I tripped over someone’s outstretched foot.
I looked up, scowling, into two pairs of eyes. A bright, cold emerald pair that belonged to my archenemy and an amazing, chocolate brown pair that belonged to Ryan Bell.
“Bloody gits,” I muttered as I dusted myself off.
“Excuse me?” Ryan said testily.
“I...called....you... a..... giiiiiiit,” I said slowly, drawing every word out, “do you understaaaaaaand?”
“You are such a bitch,” he said coldly.
“Bell, why would you be so mean? You cheated on her. You shouldn’t be cross with Cara at all, you know.” James was standing behind me, as usual, coming to my defense.
“Stay out of it, Potter,” Ryan said icily.
“No, you know, I just don’t think I am. You hurt Cara, and now, well you see, I think I am going to hurt you.” James wasn’t skinny, or scrawny, but he was a little smaller then Ryan. But he seemed just as angry.
Ryan swung first, but before he realized it, three very angry other Marauders had jumped into it. Remus was trying to separate everything, Sirius was egging James on and throwing a punch at Ryan every once in a while, and Peter was cheering also. I think he may have wet himself with over-excitement at one point.
“FIGHTING? IN THE HALLS! MY OFFICE- ALL OF YOU!” McGonagall crowed as she shoved them all down the hall. James looked back at me, smiling faintly, and I blew him a kiss.
No one knew what to do. A low buzz of conversation filled the air, and I looked to see Lily Evans approaching me.
“So Potter fights your battles now?” she said, breathless.
“No, he doesn’t usually. Jealous?”
“Of you? Never.”
“Good. I am going to win though, Evans. You know I am.”
She gave me a dirty look as she stalked away, signaling by win of that argument.
* * *
Sooner or later it was late at night and the only two people in the Common Room were Emmeline and me, and I was reading. Yes, funny, I read. Stuff it.
“Wallow with me?” she asked pathetically.
“Anytime, Em,” I said, marking my page, 52, and shutting the book, “what is the occasion?”
“He only said ‘hey Vance.’ What does that mean? Do you think it was a flirty hello or an absent-minded hello? Or could it have been a you-are-drop-dead-sexy-let’s-get-married hello?”
“Em. Take a deep breath. Don’t over analyze this, please,” I said slowly, as she nodded, “he could mean nothing or something by it. Get to know him.”
“Of course,” she said, “he wants me. Thanks, Cara!” she said happily.
Somehow I think she misinterpreted what I said.
I'll be stuck fixated on one star
When the world is crashing down
I keep telling myself
I keep telling myself
I'm not the desperate type
But you've got me looking in through blinds
I keep telling myself
I keep telling myself
I'm not the desperate type
- Seven Minutes in Heaven; Fall Out Boy.
A/N- Song = FOB. Magical stuff = Jo's. Well? This one was fun to write, veryyy fun to write! Hope it did not disappoint! Review, lovelies.
Write a Review Cara Sterling's Guide to the Marauders.: Seven Minutes in Heaven;