Chapter 13 : Everything
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You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light to my soul.
You are my purpose...you're everything.
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
I felt sick. My eyes were heavy as I opened them to see I was in the Hospital Wing. For a moment, I was at complete loss of how I had gotten here and why. As far as I could tell, I wasn’t bandaged and I felt no pain. I sat up and instantly leaned over the side of the bed as bile rushed into my mouth.
“Libby?” someone said gently. I looked up to see Ben, Lily, Kirsten, Remus, and the Gryffindor Quidditch team standing in the door way.
“Hey guys,” I croaked.
“You gave us a scare,” James said instantly by my bed.
“We thought you were going to die!” Lily said still looking a little pale.
“It was the scariest thing! Thank merlin Sirius caught you,” Kirsten added smiling. I shook my head and rubbed my eyes.
“What happened?” I asked because I seriously did not understand what was wrong with me that I was actually in the hospital wing for it.
“Jeremy hit a Bludger at you during the game. When you dodged it, it hit your broom instead and broke it. You fell about 50 feet when Black caught you. I would have, but I completely froze,” Ben explained. I eyed him curiosity. Was Ben mad that Sirius had caught me?
“Where is Sirius, anyways?” Kirsten asked. My blood seethed as I remembered what she had done before the match. I glared at her before looking at James.
“What about the game?”
“We’re going to have a rematch after Christmas holiday,” he said, “Montoya wouldn’t let me forfeit.”
“You almost gave up the match?!” I gasped.
“Yeah, you’re like my sister, Libs, I wasn’t going to let you lay in here while we finish a stupid game!” James looked horrified at the idea, “Besides, Sirius brought you up here. I didn’t expect him to be coming back.”
“Seriously, guys,” Kirsten whined, “Where’s Sirius?”
Everyone was silent for a moment as they thought. Sirius wasn’t in the room. I felt lightheaded at the thought of Sirius saving my life. My stomach tightened as I remembered how close I had been to Sirius. I wanted to be that close to him again. I could put it off no longer. I had to break up with Ben. I needed to do it now.
“Guys, can I talk to Ben for a minute?” I asked. When everyone looked at one another with clueless expressions, I rolled my eyes, “Alone?”
“Oh yeah, sure,” James said suddenly looking cheerful and walking out. Everyone followed him except Ben, who looked at me.
He deserved so much more then me. He really did. I was such a horrible person for continuing to go out with him. It will be my fault I break his heart. He was going to hate me if I do end up with Sirius. I took a deep breath.
“Ben, look I—”
“I think we should break up,” Ben cut in. I looked up at him.
“I think we should break up,” he repeated, “Things don’t seem right any more. I can tell. You never look me in the eye anymore.”
“Oh, Ben, I’m so sorry,” I said.
“Yeah, me too. But it’s for the best, I guess,” Ben shrugged, “Hopefully we can still be friends?”
“Yeah, I would like that,” I smiled.
“Okay, then. I’m glad we agree this is best,” he sighed, “I have to go. I’ll talk to you later.”
“Bye, Ben. You really are a great guy. Whichever girl you end up with will be lucky,” I smiled. Ben was at the door by now. I turned and looked at me with sad eyes.
“Not as lucky as the girl Sirius Black will end up with,” he said and then whispered, “I love you, Libby.”
I sat alone in the Hospital wing all afternoon. I had no idea where my friends had gone, I expected them to come back after Ben left, but they never did. So I sat by myself, staring at the ceiling while Madam Pomfrey sat in her office doing something or the other.
Lunch came and went. My stomach growled, but I did not leave. Madam Pomfrey will have my head. It was really unnecessary for me to be here since there really was nothing wrong with me. I never hit the ground. And it had to be normal for a girl to be a bit shaky after falling 50 feet in the air. My whole life could have ended right there.
Faint footsteps were coming up the hall outside the open door. Was it James or Lily? Hopefully Sirius? I still hadn’t seen him and he was my life saver. I sat up in the bed and tried to look like I was somewhat enjoying myself. The footsteps entered the room and I looked up, trying to look curious and not hopeful. To my disappointment, it was James who had come to see me. Not Sirius.
“Hey,” he said, pulling up a chair and sitting down.
“Hello,” I replied, my voice dripping with disappointment.
“Sorry, I tried to get Sirius to come,” James explained, “But he wouldn’t for some reason. I would have thought he would be dragging me here and not leaving your side till you were gone.”
“Oh,” was all I could say.
“So, how did it go with Ben?” James asked making himself sound casual.
“Alright, I guess. He actually broke up with me before I could break up with him,” I explained, “And then he walked out telling me he loved me.”
“He’s trying to make you feel guilty,” James said, rolling his eyes.
“I think he meant it, though,” I shrugged.
“Who cares?” James asked, “At least you two are over and you and Sirius can get together now. This is exciting! I feel as happy as I did when Lily agreed to go out with me!”
“Nothing is for sure yet, James,” I said remembering, once more, the kiss that Kirsten had shared with Sirius before the game. James seemed to know what I was thinking.
“Sirius isn’t ever going to end up with Kirsten, Libby. He is completely in love with you and nothing can change that. So, Kirsten will have to get over Sirius and find someone who is not already taken,” James said carelessly, leaning on the back legs of his chair.
“Yeah, I guess,” I shrugged. Madam Pomfrey bustled from her office and I tried one more time, “Can I leave?”
“No!” the medi-witch snapped, “No, you may not. You will leave when I say you can. Now, drink this potion, it helps with nerves and shock.”
I drank the foul smelling potion with reluctance and shuddered as it made it’s way down the back of my throat. Madam Pomfrey made sure I drank the goblet clean and then went back into her office telling me to stay put. I looked at a smirking James who seemed to enjoy me being tortured by the medi-witch.
“How’s my broom?” I asked.
“Destroyed,” James shrugged, “If we can manage to fix it, it will never fly the same again. I suggest you just buy a new one.”
“Damn,” I muttered, “I liked my broom.”
“It was getting old anyways,” James shrugged, “I mean, the acceleration wasn’t as good as it used to be and to would never fly straight anymore unless you were trying really hard to direct it.”
“How do you know?” I asked. He was speaking the truth.
“I can tell when you fly,” James shrugged, “But that’s not important. You had a Nimbus 900, but I suggest you get a Nimbus 1000 or a Shooting Star, like Sirius. Maybe even the new Comet Two-Sixty. I heard that they’re pretty good. Or—”
“James, I’ll probably just get a new Nimbus,” I said.
“Oh, fine,” James pouted.
“And I have to talk to Aunt Becky and Uncle Scott. They won’t be to happy about me killing my broom,” I groaned. My Nimbus 900 was expensive. I had gotten it the year it had come out when it had cost the most.
“It’s almost Christmas,” James said, grinning, “The broom could be your Christmas present!”
“Yeah, I guess,” I shrugged.
James left after about an hour. I laid back in the bed, once again bored. I had liked James there, making me laugh. He had taken my mind off Sirius, but now my thoughts were traveling back to him. My heart started to be faster at the thought of telling him that I’m done with Ben. I couldn’t wait any longer.
I sat up and climbed out of ben. I tiptoed towards the open doors at the other side of the room. If I can get out there, I can run for it. As I past Madam Pomfrey’s room, I ducked and crawled on the floor. The door burst open, just missing my head by inches. I held my breath.
Madam Pomfrey looked at my bed and gasped when she saw it empty. I bit my lip as she looked around the room. Then her eyes landed on me. They narrowed dangerously and I smiled weakly, knowing I was in so much trouble.
“Uh, hi,” I said trying to sound laid back and relaxed.
“Get back in bed!” Madam Pomfrey snapped. I jumped to my feet and she grabbed my arm in a rather firm grip, “You will stay here until I say you may leave!”
She shoved me onto the bed and shut the doors with her wand. Then she shut the heavy doors with her wand and locked them in place. Then she forced me to give up my own and she went into her office with it. I groaned and laid back once more. I had a feeling she was going to keep me in here longer now.
I was released from the hospital wing a few hours later. Madam Pomfrey had indeed kept me for a longer period of time to get back I mean. I least, I think she did. I left in a hurry once she handed back my wand and unlocked the doors. My skin tingled for Sirius’s touch. I just had to find him and tell him. Now. It had been much to long since I last saw him. I burst into the Gryffindor common room and saw Lily and Kirsten instead.
“Libby! We were just heading to dinner and then planning on visiting you!” Lily said hugging me.
“I was released. Do you know where Sirius is?” I asked.
Kirsten grinned, “I think I have another chance with Sirius, Libby. I mean, before when I kissed him I was testing him. He was talking to me after the match and seemed really interested! Can you believe it?”
I just stared at Kirsten before looking away hurt. She doesn’t know that I am falling for Sirius. She has every right to try to be with him. But I felt as if Sirius was mine. Is mine. Like I own him. But he’s a person, not a toy or object. I looked back at Kirsten and bit my lip.
“What?” she asked.
“Nothing, it’s just, well...” my voice trailed off.
“Just what?” Kirsten asked. Then her eyes widened, “You like him?”
“Well,” I said, “yeah.”
“Since when?” Lily asked curiously.
“Before the Hogsmeade trip,” I muttered.
There was a long silence. They felt betrayed from me not telling them. I looked at them and was surprised by their looks. Lily was smiling. She had known, I realized, whether it had been from James or not, she had indeed known. Kirsten on the other hand probably resembled what I looked like before when she kissed Sirius. Red faced and pissed off. I tried to smiled.
“You like Ben though! You’ve been with him for almost a month!” Kirsten shrieked.
“Yeah and it was a waste,” I said.
“You gave up your chance with Sirius!” she hissed.
“He never said he was done with me,” I countered.
“But you said you were!” she snapped.
“I lied,” I said simply. Then explained, “James says that Sirius has liked me since first year. That he was in love with me since forth. I think I’ve liked Sirius since he kissed me over the summer. I was just to stubborn to admit it. I’m sorry Kirsten.”
“No you’re not!” Kirsten said before turning and stomping up the stairs.
I looked at Lily and she shrugged.
“She’ll get over it, Libs,” she assured me, “Just go find Sirius. It’s about time you two get together.”
“Do you know where he is?” I asked.
“Try his dormitory. I think he and James went up there to get ready for dinner,” Lily suggested. I smiled.
I climbed the staircase up to their dormitory. I didn’t hesitate to knock on the door or anything. I just pushed it open. The four Marauders were there. Remus was eating a chocolate bar from Honeydukes. James was playing with the Golden Snitch, which he probably stole, and Peter was staring at him expectantly. Sirius, looking like a God, was leaning against his bed. All four of them looked at me from their circle on the floor, startled by the interruption. James smiled the second he saw me.
For a split second, I considered just asking to talk to Sirius alone, but that would mean having to wait for three boys to leave and then I would have to find my nerves again to tell Sirius. Right now, my skin was tingling, my heart racing and my heart was in control. I didn’t even bother looking at the other three. I went right up to Sirius, kneeled down on my knees and kissed him.
I had thought that our last kiss was amazing, but it faded compared to this. Our lips melted together and moved as one. The kiss sent waves of passion and love through me. For a second I didn’t think I could handle the intensity of the kiss and was ready to pulled away, but like the last two times, I could not. Something held me in place. I don’t know how long I was pressed up against Sirius feeling how I should have felt all year, but when I pulled away it was much to soon. I smiled and blushed slightly as I looked at the other three shocked and amazed Marauders.
“Okay, guys, come on,” Remus said, coming to his senses first and standing up. He slapped James and Peter on the back of their heads and dragged them out of the room. I turned back towards Sirius.
“What about Ben?” he asked.
“We’re over,” I said, surprised that James hadn’t told him. I fixed my position so I was more comfortable and closer to Sirius, “I need you, Sirius. I literally need you.”
“For real?” Sirius asked. He didn’t seem able to believe it.
“Yes, Sirius, for real,” I said. Tears were in my eyes but they didn’t spill over. Sirius grinned and kissed me again. He moaned as I kissed him back hungrily. This is what I want.
“Then be my girlfriend,” Sirius said when we pulled back, looking into my eyes, “Be my girlfriend, my lover, my everything.”
“Yes,” I murmured, pressing my forehead to his, “I’ll be your everything.”
“I love you more then words can say.” Sirius whispered longingly.
“Me too, Sirius,” I replied. I knew Kirsten would be mad at this. Ben would hate me and every other girl in the school will envy me. But I didn’t care. This is how things were supposed to be.
I can’t interfere with fate now, can I?
“Did the Sorting Hat saying anything to you about fate in our first year?” I asked a bit nervously.
“Yes,” Sirius replied pushing me away to look at me, “It told me that I am destined to be with someone, though I will feel so much pain to love her. I thought nothing of it at the time.”
“I cause you pain?” I asked.
“Well, screaming to the entire school that I’m a git, going out with two morons who just wants to get in your pants, hating me for the past five years, and just knowing that I couldn’t have you hurt pretty bad,” Sirius laughed.
“I’m sorry,” I muttered.
“Don’t worry about it. You’re here now,” Sirius kissed me softly and my heart sped up automatically, “Did the Sorting Hat say anything to you? About fate, I mean.”
“It put me in Gryffindor when it decided it can’t interfere with fate,” I explained, “I didn’t really worry about it either. Not until we kissed over the summer. Then I started to think about it.”
“I’ve been hoping you were who I was destined to be with since the Sorting Hat told me,” Sirius smiled showing off that dimple.
“I can honestly say that I love your smile without having to worry about you getting the wrong impression,” I said.
“And I can say I really meant it when I said I have a thing for curly hair. Because I do, thanks to you.” Sirius kissed me softly once more when my stomach rumbled. I blushed and Sirius, stood, pulling me up with him, “I need food, too.”
“You always need food,” I said, grinning.
Sirius wrapped his arm around my waist as we left the room. He pulled open the door where James, Remus, and Peter fell over one another from the lack of wall. I rolled my eyes knowing they had heard almost everything. I looked at Sirius with an amused expression and he smirked.
“And you call me the git,” he muttered as we crawled over the sheepish looking boys. I gave James a wink and he grinned.
“Where are you going?” he asked, standing.
“We’re hungry,” I said simply.
“Oh, wait up, will you? I’ll get Lily!” James was more excited then a little kid with a brand new toy. He practically skipped on his way down the stairs in search for Lily.
Sirius and I made our way down the stairs together, savoring our last moments of peace before dinner. Lily was sitting in front of the fire when we entered the common room. She had a book out, as usual, but was staring up at James as he bounced about. She glanced at me and smiled. I grinned back and she stood.
“Okay, let’s go eat. I have the worst craving for lettuce!” James said eagerly.
“You had lettuce for lunch,” Sirius rolled his eyes.
“So? I need more!” James laughed.
“Ever since last December,” I muttered. Sirius looked at me.
“Last December what?” he asked.
“James has been obsessed with lettuce and broccoli and other such foods,” I shrugged.
“Gasp!” James suddenly stopped in the middle of the hall.
“What?” Lily asked, looking at James oddly. He looked at Sirius.
“Tomorrow is a full moon!” he said.
“Yeah, so?” Sirius shrugged.
“I just remember, is all,” James smiled and began bouncing down the hall again.
“Oi, James, calm down!” I shouted after him and then looked at Sirius, “I’ve never seen him like this before. Have you?”
“Yeah. Last year after succeeding in some very powerful magic. Actually, it was a bit weirder then this,” Sirius laughed to himself at the memory he wasn’t completely sharing with me. Lily fell in step beside us as James danced down the hall like a ballerina.
We all watched him in horror.
“This makes no sense!” I groaned banging my head on the table Sunday night. The school was in complete shock to see Sirius and I walk into the Great Hall, hand in hand and then flirt with one another all through dinner. Rumors were spread and we were the latest gossip, but I honestly didn’t care.
“We need help!” Lily agreed scribbling out another sentence in her transfiguration essay. It was on Animagus Transformation Errors. We had to list the possible outcomes and the way to reverse them. Lily even needed help and she was on the top of our year!
“You know, Sirius and James are good at Transfiguration,” Kirsten, who was still a bit angry at me, said. I sighed.
The three Marauders, excluding Remus who went to visit his mother again(does he go every month?), went to bed early. It had only been a quarter past ten then and I knew Sirius and James weren’t tired at all. They were wide awake and excited and happy about something. But I didn’t argue with them figuring they had been planning a prank or something. However, I saw no sign of them leaving and I was good at knowing where James was under his cloak. It was now well past one in the morning.
“Should we wake them?” Lily asked looking hopeful.
“I’m not waking James. He is not a happy camper when you wake him,” I said shaking me head, “I’ll try to wake Sirius though. I never woke him up before and I’ll doubt he’ll mind helping.”
“Go on then. And wake James anyways,” Lily said, “Tell him I need him.”
I nodded and stood. Then I went up to the boys dormitory and pushed open the door. The room was dark with the light of the full moon the only way to see. I saw three of five beds had their hangings shut all the way. Frank was snoring with his hangings half closed and Remus’s bed was empty. I remembered which bed was Sirius’s and tiptoed over, not wanting to wake Peter or Frank.
I pulled the hangings opened and was ready to jump on Sirius when I saw the bed was empty. Frowning, I searched under the bed and on the other side thinking he had fallen off. But he just wasn’t there. Suddenly curious, I made my way over to James’s bed and pulled the hangings back. He was gone too! Angry, I pulled back Peter’s hangings. Nothing! They had gotten past me!
I went downstairs, not caring about being noisy anymore. Lily and Kirsten looked up hopefully from their essays and frowned when they saw me alone. I plopped on the couch and crossed my arms across my chest.
“They’re not there,” I pouted, “They must have snuck out.”
“All three of them?” Kirsten asked raising an eyebrow, “Without Remus?”
“Can they be doing a prank?” Lily shrugged.
“What else would they be doing?” I snapped, “Never before has James gotten by me. Whether he’s under the cloak or not!”
“Well, it’s getting to late to do this now and I have a headache,” Lily said, “I’m going to bed. Good night.”
“I’m coming, too,” Kirsten said also standing. She then followed Lily up to the girls’ dormitory.
Could they be doing a prank? Or could they be doing something else that they really shouldn’t be doing? I leaned back on the couch telling myself I’ll wait for them to return. They couldn’t be much longer. None of their pranks took more then an hour to set up. I shut my eyes for a minute.
When I opened them the fire in the common room had burned to nothing and the common room was quiet clean which meant the house elves had already been through here. I looked at my watch and saw it was four in the morning. Three hours sleep. I never heard the boys come in. Quickly, I tiptoed up the stairs to see an empty dormitory besides Frank who was still snoring away. Going back downstairs, now worried, I went to the window and looked out at the moonlit grounds.
What I saw made myself rub my eyes and gasp. It was that dog that I had followed Ben and me in Hogsmeade. He was running around, back and forth. I couldn’t see what he was running at until a deer, a stag, came into view of the window. It too seemed to be trying to get something’s attention. There was a howl that didn’t come from the dog and was close. I pushed open the window. The cold air nipped my cheeks as I stuck my head out to get a better view of the scene that just so happened to be in front of the window.
I almost scream seeing a full grown werewolf stalking towards the oddly paired animals. The dog ran towards it and playfully tackled it. The were wolf chased it and the stag joined in. I was amazed that animals would dare approach something that could easily kill them. But a werewolf. Who was it? Why in the world would Dumbledore allow a werewolf onto the grounds? Fear started to seep through my veins. Was it a student? Dumbledore wouldn’t put the whole school at risk for one student would he?
The second the thought crossed my mind I felt guilty. Werewolves were normal humans except for one time a month when the full moon came. I watched the werewolf play with the animals. The dog and stag seemed incredibly smart for animals, actually. When the wolf tried to run off they distracted it and started a new game. I tilted my head to the side as the wolf howled loudly at the moon.
The name hit me quite suddenly and I had no idea why it had just come to me looking at the wolf. Frowning, I looked at the stag. It’s antlers were prong like. Prongs. Oh. My. God. Prongs. Moony. Padfoot.
My mind was working fast as I pieced the names with the animals. Padfoot, like the padded feet of a dog. Prongs, like the antlers. Moony, because the moon was the reason for the transformation of the werewolf. I knew the werewolf was Remus now. The sickish looks, the monthly disappearances. I vaguely remember James say something about Remus’s furry little problem when he didn’t think anyone was listening. But Wormtail. What did that mean? There was only three figures down there, so where was Peter?
The stag and dog chased the werewolf into the forest and I shut the window. For James and Sirius to be animals that would me they were Animagus. It would explain James’s sudden obsession for green food and Sirius’s likeliness of a dog. That meant that they had been running outside with a werewolf since last December. Could this be the powerful magic Sirius had mentioned before. The magic that made James so happy? I would think watching a stag do ballet would be a bit weirder then watching a sixteen year old boy do it.
Sighing and trying to relax from the shock, worry, and fear of what I had discovered, I laid down on the couch. The common room was quite cold now from the window being open, but I shut my eyes and fell into a restless sleep. I don’t know how long I was asleep, but I awoke to two voices entering the common room. The sun was rising now and I could see the outline of James’s tall skinny figure, Sirius’s tall broad figure , and Peter’s short pudgy figure.
James was helping Sirius shuffle into the room. He was groaning and I immediately stood up making the three boys freeze.
A/N: Did you guys get that giggly, fluffy feeling??
Sorry about the little something from the last chapter. I don't know what happened to it, and I know I posted it up. I'm going to put a bit up, and i'm sorry if i doesn't stay there.
Chp 14. Untitled (that is a song. a very good song by Finch. It doesn't go with the chapter, i don't think, i just had nothing else to name the chapter.):
“You know I think you’re the most gorgeous thing in the Universe, right? And you don’t have to be blond or big chested for me to want to look at you.” he said.
“I do know that, Sirius,” I nodded. Sirius looked relieved.
“And I don’t want to shag you,” Sirius said. Then he frowned, “Well, I do, but not until you’re ready. I’m not going to force you to do anything.”
“I know, Sirius. I never listen to anything the Slytherins say,” I promised.
“I love you,” Sirius whispered.
“I love you, too,” I smiled. Sirius kissed me and then we went back to our capartment.
There's a bit of French in the next chapter. Now, even though i've been taking classes since forever, i have no idea what the first thing about french is, so if someone can possibly help me out, please tell me so and leave your email or something so i can send you what Sirius, and his mother, say. Thanks.
Don't forget to review. It makes me want to update everyday, which is why i have been. You all are you wondferful!!
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