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The Grass Is Much Greener on the Other Side by private_ryan
Chapter 3 : Peter Pettigrew's Pouts
Rating: 15+Chapter Reviews: 8

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Chapter 3: Peter Pettigrew’s Pouts

Disclaimer: I own nothing, nada, zip.

“Alright…Alright, I can’t believe that backstabbing dolt! You do not resemble a deer in any way! Except your ears are a little pointy and rather large….but no that’s not the point! He is a big pooper head! We need revenge! Lots of revenge, so much revenge he’ll drowned in it!” Lily Evans roared in the first years Gryffindor dormitory. She was on her bed, her hands curling into fists and laughing hysterically.

“Lily….you’re scaring the other girls.” I said from my bed (which happen to be right next to captain frizzy’s) flipping through a magazine. It was a rather boring one too. The main article was how to boil cheese in a cauldron while also dicing fish. It apparently was the meal that was sweeping the nation…of Japan.

This was true. The other three Gryffindor ladies were quite appalled at Lily’s asylum typed behavior and were huddled together in the opposite corner from her- whispering.

“Besides….why should you care. You weren’t embarrassed by the whole school and already made two enemies.” I continued, now staring up at the popcorn shaped ceiling. Oh how Mark would pay. I imagined one of the popcorn shaped things of the ceiling to be his head and started thinking of ways to inflict pain on it. Possessed much? No, well…maybe.

“Because my dear Teely, I am your friend. Friends do things for each other.” Lily stated and then burst out into laughter.

“Why are you laughing?” I said backing slowly away from this…this….inane freak. I knew she was crazy the moment I saw her hair.

“Because…because….I said dear….Teely! DEER!” Lily said in-between her giggles.

“You’re a freak!” I shouted and threw my pillow at Lily. Lily not seeing got hit straight on in the face and proceeded to fall backwards off her bed.

“How could you fall off the bed? It’s a pillow! It’s not a brick!” I said half concerned, half trying to conceal her huge smile. I mean you would be smiling too; it was pretty hilarious, seeing someone else being the klutz for once.

Gosh, I am mean.

“DEER TEELY!” Lily yelled and started to roll around on the floor laughing.

The girls in the opposite corner now took the chance and ran out of the dormitory, thinking that if they stay there any longer they would catch some sort of disease. Oh how I hate those girls already. I mean sure Lily is weird. But she’s my weird freak…I mean friend. My weird friend. They shouldn’t judge her by the way she rolls on the floor taking to herself.

I’m surrounded by idiots. I have officially decided that.

“DEER!” Lily gasped, and began to kick her feet up in the air, her face red as a…fire hydrant minus the dog if you know what I’m saying.

The best thing about the first day of school is that you get to see how many people try and put up acts of being cool. I already being labeled as being a deer didn’t have to worry about trying to act cool. I was already labeled as lame, which suited my perfectly fine.

Okay maybe it didn’t.

“What classes do you think we’ll have? I was reading Hogwarts, A History and it had loads of classes listed! I just hope I can manage them. I mean I only tried each and every spell in the Standard Book of Spells seven times each.” Lily told me while we were eating breakfast in the Great Hall.

I refrained from eating fruits, because deer eat fruit. If Teely ate fruit, Teely would be called a deer. Why is Teely talking in third person?

“Lily I swear, you’re so bipolar.” I said, taking a piece of toast. For instance yesterday night, Lily was completely insane; I promise you she was laughing for at least ten minutes straight. But today she was overly intelligent girl, telling me she had practice every spell in a book seven times each. And the way she was dressed; you would be completely oblivious that she wore care bear pajamas from what she was wearing today. For today Lily was wearing a skirt and a white blouse, with robes of course! And now she was looking at me, as if i was CRAZY?

“I am not! You’re so mean Teely, what if someone who WAS bipolar was around. You could’ve hurt their feelings!” Lily hissed under her breath, staring me down.

“Do you see anyone crying uncontrollably.” I said aimlessly watching as Professor McGonagall started to pass out schedules.

I did learn her name by the way. McGonagall; I was close by saying Mc Goose.

I thought Lily was going to make a comeback from my “rude comment”, but she just sat there staring at something behind me. Now I don’t want to sound me, but she my friend was the one who looked like a deer in the headlights. Look at her, her tongue was rolled up.


“What are you staring at?” I finally asked as I took my schedule from McGonagall.

One word she said make my insides squelch together.


“Oh well, stop it! You look so stupid. Wait what am I thinking? Carry on!” I encouraged. Hey if I was known as an idiot, she should be too.

Gosh, I am mean! I mean I know I already said that, but I am.

Lily glared at me. “Well just so you know, he was looking at you.”

The first class of the day was none other than Potions. I am a muggleborn witch as we all know by now (hopefully), and I just wanted to point out, having a class in the dungeons did not spark delight within me.

Lily was practically skipping all the way down there. She was excited. I am not. Potions, mixing stuff together, and watching it blow up in your face. F-U-N!

“Oh my Lantern! Teely, the Professor is opening the door, let’s run in so we can get front row seats!” Lily squealed with delight and took my arm and dragged me in there.

Two words can only describe this classroom; dark and smelly.

“Don’t take your seats! I have made a seating chart!” The professor called merrily as we students moaned. The professor, and I am trying to say this as nice as humanly possible, looked like a pig. His nose was squashed up in his face, which made his eyes far apart. His Hair was brown and receding fast. He was plump. He was….going to get made fun of a lot.

“Look who it is, it’s DEER-lightful to see you again,” A voice came from behind me. It was sock boy! Oh how he hated me.

“Oh I’m glad to see you’re in a mashed mood!” I snapped back. Get it? I threw mashed potatoes at him- never you mind.

I never pay attention to teacher when they are doing seating charts. My mind goes blank, and I only hear my name and no one else’s.

See I always thought this was a good thing but after being paired up to sit with one of sock boy’s friends I now dread the moments in this class.

His name was Peter Pettigrew.

The potions assignment was easy enough. You had to boil water and make macaroni and cheese. I thought Potions was going to be hard. Silly me.

“Professor what is the significance of making food in Potions class?” a boy with greasy hair asked.

“All in due time m’boy just do as told now.” Professor Slughorn said happily and went to his desk.

“I hate cheese. I always get so gassy.” That boy, Peter, told me.

“Thank you for telling me.” I told him out plainly waiting for my water to boil.

“Why are we making this? I hate to boil water, I always get burned.” Peter said.

“So sorry.”

“Why does water have to boil? I hate that water boils. It makes splashes.” Peter told me.

“I have no clue.”

“I can’t swim.” Peter moaned, as his water began to boil.

“And you’re telling me this because….”

“I dropped my quill in the water! Gosh!” Peter complained.

“Okay, so get it out you fool!”

Peter put his hand in the water and yelled.

“WHAT?” I yelled with him.

“It burns!” Peter said motioning towards his hands.

“NO dip, you’re water is boiling!”

“You told me to get the quill out!” Peter said, tears in his eyes.

“I thought you had enough common sense to turn the burner off!” I yelled.

“Stop yelling at me!” Peter yelled.

“I’m not yelling!” I shouted.





“Okay shut up!” a different boy yelled from the table in front of us. He was cute. I hope he’s a Gryffindor.

“Stop it! I am in pain!” Peter moaned.

“Then get some ice.” I reasoned.

Peter got up, muttering under his breath.

“Sorry. He was complaining.” I said looking at the boy. He had dark brown hair that was close to covering his eyes and grey eyes as a matter of fact.

“Yeah well can’t really say you weren’t either.” He said and turned back around.

My mouth hung open like an idiot.

A/N: so here is the long awaited chapter three! It’s one of my favourites, so I hoped you like it too! Leave a review! =P I have brownies! big, brown brownies that are...erm...brown! but only if yah review! =P xxoo

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