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Tonight I Wanna Cry by Sparkling_Darkness
Chapter 1 : Tonight I Wanna Cry
 
Rating: 12+Chapter Reviews: 7


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Disclaimer: The fantastic characters that you are about to read about in my story solely belong to the magnificent and almighty J.K. Rowling. I just like to take the characters and twist them to my wills. Oh, if I owned them the things I would do (smirks)! The song, "Tonight I Wanna Cry" belongs to Keith Urban, not me. The only thing of value I do own is a Pentium one laptop which the monitor doesn't even work so I have to hook it up to another one. The one I hook it up to turns blue at random and I have to beat it with my fist to turn it back to normal.... Pathetic, huh?
Well now enjoy the story and on with the show!

*Raises Curtain*

Alone in this house again tonight
I got the TV on, the sound turned down and a bottle of wine
There's pictures of you and I on the walls around me
The way that it was and could have been surrounds me
I'll never get over you walkin' away


He was alone again tonight, just like he had been for the past two weeks since she left. The TV could be heard softly in the background as rain poured down on the roof. The weather had been matching his mood since the day she left. It had been dark, gloomy, with lots of rain, which, wasn't irregular for England. A bottle of red wine was sitting on the table next to a his empty glass. It was just like his life, dry and empty.

The walls that surrounded him were filled with pictures of her and himself. Ones from their seventh year at Hogwarts, different dates they went on, events, and the night he proposed to her. A night that he would never forget even if he wanted to. She had told him over and over how much she loved him and they hadn't been able to stop smiling after she agreed. They had spent the night laughing, dancing, playing, and after the ball they had made love for the first time. It had been the happiest night of his entire life and he didn't think anything cold top it. If they got married, then yes, but that obviously wasn't going to happen. She made that quite clear when she just packed her things and left.

He still couldn't understand what had went wrong. He hadn't really done anything wrong that he could think of. He didn't know what he could have said or done to upset her so much. The only thing he had ever done was love her with all his heart. 'Was that it?'

He let out a long sigh and filled his glass with the dark red liquid that would ease the pain. He swirled it in his glass a little and watched a drop fall out and trickled down like a tear. He, now more than ever in his life, wanted nothing more than to cry until all his love for her was drained out. That was what he couldn't do because every time he almost did his father's voice haunted him.

'Malfoy's never cry.'

He shuddered and tried to shake his fathers voice from his mind. That was the one thing he really didn't need right now. He was long since dead and Draco wanted his mind to pretend that he never existed in the first place. His father had ruined so much from him and had always been so cruel. That was life and some things you couldn't just change no matter if you should be able to.

He missed her so much that he thought it would tear his heart out. He missed hearing her laughter bouncing off the walls. He missed her warm and comforting hugs and the gentle kisses. He missed her voice that would always soothe him after a long day at work. He knew in his heart he would never get over her walking away from everything they had. It wouldn't be right if he got over it because he knew deep in her heart she wouldn't.

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry


He thought back to what Hermione had told him right before she left. He remembered everything about that sorry day. The sounds, smells, surroundings, just as if it was yesterday.....

Two weeks ago....

Draco had just gotten home early from the Ministry to surprise Hermione. He took his cloak off and hung it up before creeping through the house to find her. When he couldn't find her anywhere on the first floor of their home he slowly crept up the stairs in search of her. He saw light coming from the bottom of the door and slowly pushed it open, not expecting what he saw.

Draco watched as Hermione was gathering all her belongings and throwing or packing them into suitcases and trunks. She had tears falling down her cheeks and turned to go to the closet to get more clothes until she saw him watching her. "What are you doing?" he asked with questioning eyes.

She paused for a moment as if trying to find a way to say what she wanted to with out it hurting so much. "I'm leaving you Draco," she said and resumed gathering her things.

"What?" he said marching over to her a slamming the case shut to cease her packing. "Why are you leaving me?!"

"Why do you think Draco!? I never see you anymore! You're never around and when you are you're too tired to pay attention to me! Why should you care if I leave!? Ever since we moved in together you've thrown yourself into work and ignored me! What did I do to you that makes you act like I'm not here!? I've been waiting for you to come back to me and you haven't so I'm leaving! It shouldn't have even lasted this long in the first place, anyways."

He turned her to look at him and made her look into his eyes. "I'm sorry! Things have been getting so crazy ever since Snape is trying to take over Voldemort's place. I couldn't leave! I'll make it up to you! I promise, just don't leave me! I never forgot about you, ever! I love you with all my heart and I could never forget! How is what we have not right? I've never experienced anything more right in my life!"

She looked down as she tried to suppress the sobs but not the tears. She could only do so much. "It just isn't and you know it! I can't be right if I have to give up everything I have! I've lost two of my best friends and all the Weasley's except Ginny! Everyone thinks I've betrayed them because I'm with you! They won't even respond to the wedding invitations! So there can't be a wedding if no one comes, Draco! I need my friends support and if I don't have it I-"

"Don't just sit there and act like you're the only one who's given up something! I've lost all but one of my friends and my father came after me and tried to kill me after he found out we were together! We've both lost a lot but I thought this love was worth it! It was for me! Tell me it wasn't if you want to leave, then!"

She pulled herself from his grip and continued packing her things. She pointed her wand at all of her things and shouted, "The Burrow!" Then she turned back to him sadly. "I'm sorry Draco but I can't keep living this way. I can't live with out my friends and I-I just can't stay with you."

He took two long strides, turned her around, and smashed his lips to her for the most amazing kiss either would experience in there life. Maybe it was because they both thought it would be the last. Maybe because They put all there emotions into it or maybe because it was really meant to be. She put her arms around his neck as his skilled tongue entered her mouth and battled with her own. Hermione's hands ran wild in his hair as his caressed her back. He pressed himself into her completely and he heard he sigh.

Suddenly she broke away and pushed him back. "I'm sorry Draco. Good bye." Before he could reach her she apparated with a heartbreaking, 'POP'.


Would it help if I turned a sad song on
"All By Myself" would sure hit me hard now that you're gone
Or maybe unfold some old yellow lost love letters
It's gonna hurt bad before it gets better
But I'll never get over you by hidin' this way


He slowly took another long drink before he set the glass back down again. He put his face in his hands as his heart wrenched. He wanted to cry now more than ever and couldn't understand why he couldn't. It was like it would prove he was human and that he could feel. That he wasn't numb on the inside. But when he thought about it, now maybe he was.

Draco got up and turned on the stereo that Hermione had taught him how to use. She had left her CD in there and he only listened to it now. Soon "All By Myself" came on and was floating into the room before he sat back down. Ever word that floated through the room stabbed at his heart repeatedly with a sharp knife. It probably hurt so bad because he could hear her soft voice quietly whispering the words.

He slowly stood up again and walked out of the room and into his study. He slowly walked over to his desk and unlocked his top drawer. He slowly pulled out a small box and strode back to his chair in the living room and sat down. He ran his fingers along the edges of the box as if he were afraid it would break.

There was a red bow with gold trim tied around the box into a little bow, which, he dropped onto the table. He took off the lid and put it in the same place. He lightly ran his hand over the material and pulled out one of the folded pieces of parchment. He opened it slowly and saw Hermione's hand writing filled the page until it reached the bottom. His eyes looked over it and read the words to himself.

Dear Draco,
Well, I've finally gotten all my things together and my parents are going to help me bring my things over. I'm so excited that we'll get to live together! Things have really been like a dream come true and I'm just so happy. My parents were a little worried at first but they'll be fine in good time. I'm just glad that they liked you so much when they met you the other night over dinner!

You're probably wondering what happened at the Weasley's last night when I announced my engagement. Well, to say the least no one was very excited except Ginny and Mrs. Weasley. It surprised me that Mr. Weasley wasn't even the least bit happy for me. We both knew that Ron and Harry wouldn't like this but I didn't expect what they gave me for a reaction. Ron started up an argument in a flash which Harry jumped into immediately. I couldn't believe that they, of all people, could be this harsh! They just kept going on and on and on and on about how bad you were for me! By the end of it I was in tears and left the house.

Needless to say some of them might not attend the wedding and it makes me so very sad. I think Harry, Ron, Ginny, and Mrs. Weasley will come but I can't see the others agreeing to go. At least I have you and Ginny to help me through this. She sent me an owl and said she would try and patch things up the best she could. I'm so thankful that I have you and her around!

I love you so much Draco and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. No matter what happens or what anyone says I will always love you. I don't know how I could live with out you now that we've been through so much. You will always have a place in my heart and I will never leave you. I-


Draco set the letter down, not being able to read it anymore, and took a deep breath. He knew that he had to face this even if his mind screamed at him to not. It was going to hurt bad before things would get better and the longer he waited, the worse things would probably get. He needed to cry, to get it all out, so he could begin to move one with his life. He had to let things heal over instead of just letting them freeze over. Draco refused to go back to the person he once was even if Hermione wouldn't be around.

Draco slowly went over to the window and opened the curtains to reveal a beautiful night sky. He had to stop hiding from the world that was still spinning even though his world had stopped. It wouldn't help any to just curl in a ball and die, even if he kind of wanted to. Hermione wouldn't have wanted that even though she left him. He let his forehead rest against the cool pane of glass on the balcony doors. The stars seemed to dance as his soul cried out a sad melody of heart break.

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry


Suddenly he felt his eyes begin to sting and his vision begin to blur. He blinked and felt two drops spill over each lid before he let out a pain stricken howl. Many began to flow down his cheeks as he sobbed into the empty echoing house. He slammed his fist into the glass out of anger and sadness as he thought of how she just left him. Once, twice, three times, then it shattered and glass went flying everywhere including at him.

Glass grazed his face, bare arms, and any other skin it could reach. He didn't even feel them cut as his heart wrenched and his soul ripped in half. The void Hermione had left was now growing bigger, threatening to consume him and all that was left. He sunk to the floor as he leaned on a wall by the door frame to the living room. To his horror he saw a whispy figure appear before him. It was his father.

"This is absolutely disgraceful, Draco." His father taunted him as he seemed to survey Draco.

"You're not real. You're not real! You're not real!" Draco whispered to himself over and over as he continued to cry with out restraint.

"As long as you keep me in your mind I am," he sneered at his son. "Do you remember what happens to Malfoy's that cry?"

Then he saw something that he thought he had long since put away and forgotten....

"Draco! I told you didn't I? I warned you that you were NEVER to cry! Now you will receive your punishment." Lucius stood over his 12 year old son and raised it above him.

"Father, please! I'm sorry! I'll never disobey you again!" Draco screamed helplessly as he saw a terrifying glint claim shelter in his fathers eyes.

"Crucio!" his father yelled ruthlessly at his stricken son. Draco screamed at the top of his lungs as bolt after bolt of pain coursed through his body. He tried to curl into a little ball thinking that it would somehow help him. His body wouldn't listen as Luicius wand had it on it's puppet strings. "You cried again Draco. I guess I'll have to keep doing in until you stop."

"Father, I-"

"Crucio!" Draco screamed again as his body convulsed under the curses strength and pain. He couldn't stop screaming, it was just too much for him to take. No one would save him, he could die by his father. This-


"Draco!"

Suddenly he opened his eyes and the pain and screaming stopped. Instead of his father's ice blue eyes he met hazel ones filled with worry, concern, and tears.

"Hermione?" His hand cupped her cheek and he felt her warm skin and felt the tears that were coming down them. She was real, she was really kneeling in front of him. She was back. "What are you doing here?"

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry


Instead of answering she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him as close as she could. He instantly wrapped his arms around her as a few tears rolled down his cheeks. Her hair brushed against his cheek and he could smell the Vanilla he missed so much. She still used Vanilla.

"I'm so sorry Draco," she sobbed into his shoulder as her frail body shook in his arms. "I should have never left! I was so stupid! I've missed you ever since the second you left my sight. I can't live with out you, I really can't because with out you I'm half empty. I love you so much and I can't believe what I did to you! Please forgive me! I'm so sorry!"

He pulled back a bit and looked into her crying eyes as he searched for truth. Somehow, he saw everything she had said floating in them. "What about everyone else?"

"I told them if they don't like it then sod off. I need you. I can't live with out. I love you. An for everyone else.... Frankly, I don't give a damn." He collided his lips with hers in a passionate and rejoining kiss that filled his hear with love and joy. He pulled her into his lap and put his arms around her waist and pulled her flush against him. Every inch of his body awakened at her touch and they both sighed in content.

Slowly he pulled up and whispered, "I love you so much, Hermione. Don't ever leave me again, promise?"

She looked into his eyes and smiled as she said, "I love you too, Draco. I promise." He moved in to kiss her again but she held her finger to his lips. Then she grinned broadly and uttered three of the most life altering words Draco had heard so far. "Draco, I'm pregnant!"

*~_The End_~*

Thanks for reading and please review! (There will probably be another follow up!)

Quinn




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