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A Dummy's Guide To Invading Hogwarts by Andie
Chapter 1 : First Impressions
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 8

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Andie17: not ours.

Zira: Damn it all why not??!!

Andie17: Because you prat, we didn't write the fricking books.

Zira:....that's what you think.....wanker.

Andie17: ya ya Zira. Keep dreaming...stupid git

Zira: ....Hey be nice... Giraffes are cool.

Andie17: I agree. But Blowfish are weird. I mean.they're all blowy & stuff

Zira: I Know!!!

Andie17: What gives them the right to puff up.He poofs.

Zira: Too much Buffy for you. Not enough Harry Potter.

Andie17: Hey I got you hooked on Harry Potter first! JUNK!

Zira: Tom Felton is chained in my basement

Andie17: No he isn't. EJ let him out remember?

Zira: Damn you! Damn you to dirty, dirty hell.

Summary: Okay, yeah. This story is co written by Zira and Andie17 (aka Krysta & Andrea). This is what happens when we go to Hogwarts. PS read our other stories or we'll kill you.KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!! WITH LEPRECHAUNS!!! *stupid evil laugh *

A Dummies Guide To: Invading Hogwarts

Chapter One: First Impressions

The Great Hall was swarming with children. All dressed in their different house colours, chatting away like little ants in a colony. Harry Potter and his friends sat at the Gryffindor table, with the proud and courageous Gryffindor Lion gracing the front of their robes.

Draco Malfoy and his pathetic minions sat across the room wearing triumphantly the Slytherin Serpent on their own robes, glaring at the trio hatefully.

The feast had not begun yet; everyone was still waiting for the Sorting to take place. Professor McGonagall led the small group of first years down the centre aisle to the front of the room.

Harry frowned. "Hey those girls don't look like first years," he said curiously, eyeing two tall girls at the back of the group. Parvati Patil leaned across the table to him.

"I heard that they got kicked out of their other school and Hogwarts was the only place that would take them." Ron looked impressed.

"Expelled, huh?"

"I wonder what they did," Harry said to no one in particular. He looked across the table to Hermione who didn't look at all pleased with the new comers. "What's a matter Hermione?" Harry asked.

"What afraid they might be competition 'Mione?" Ron teased. Hermione glared at him and picked up her cup of pumpkin juice.

"Hardly. How smart could they be? Look at how they're dressed. No one who had brains would dress like THAT." Hermione glanced over to Harry and Ron, who commonly wiped the drool off their chins.

"Ya. Look at them." Hermione snorted and smacked Ron on the arm, which in turn knocked Ron over, who hit Harry and successfully sent them both back to reality.

One of the girls looked tall, but that was probably the effect of the lace-up black leather boots that trailed up her legs to her knees. Blonde hair tumbled in golden waves down her back, offset by the stylish and expensive-looking leather duster that swirled around her feet. A red leather miniskirt rode high on her pale thighs. A very revealing and lacy black shirt let almost nothing to the imagination. The girl was.well endowed. Her long nails were polished with black paint. Her makeup was expertly applied to make her brilliant hazel eyes flash dangerously.

The other was also tall, but the black spike high-heels just added to it. The leather boots also rose to her slender knees, just being revealed under a knee-length black skirt. She fashioned a short black girdle ending just under the breast with a white blouse with large fancy cuffs on the ends of her sleeves. Her silky brown hair was curled and partially pulled back, a glittering hair clasp holding it in place. Her make-up was less noticeable with more of a natural hint to it. Her glittering green eyes sparkled behind the black mascara and eyeliner.

All in all, they were both gorgeous. Harry roughly smacked Ron in the chest to get his attention.

"Ow. What do you want?"

"Check out Snape." Harry pointed toward the teachers' table and Ron obediently followed his lead. Professor Snape had abandoned his usual patronizing glare for one of absolute astonishment. "I think the good ol' Professor has a wittle crush," Harry mocked, pouting to further emphasize his point. Ron slapped a hand over his mouth to stifle a laugh. Hermione sighed, shaking her head in resignation.

"Yeah. Look at Malfoy. Look's like he's got it bad too." The blond Slytherin looked as though he made a lewd comment about the new girls, as Crabbe and Goyle laughed moronically.

The Sorting commenced and the first years were assigned houses. Harry waited for the feast to begin, but it didn't. He looked up at the front of the room. Dumbledore had joined the two girls. He laid a hand on each of their shoulders.

"Welcome to Hogwarts. The feast will begin momentarily, but if I could have your attention for just a brief second, I would be grateful." The questioning murmurs of the students quieted. "Thank you. I would like to introduce two students new to Hogwarts. May I present Andrea Smith," he said of the blonde girl, "and Krysta Swales," he referred to the brunette.

"They will be joining the Gryffindor fifth years." Most of the Gryffindor males whistled and clapped at Dumbledore's announcement. "They have just transferred here from Canada. I trust you will all do your best to make them feel welcome. You may take your seats," he said to Andrea and Krysta, motioning them to the Gryffindor table. They strolled down the aisle and took their seats.

Next to Harry and Ron.

Next Chapter

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