Disclaimer: I don’t own anything. Not a thing! It all belongs to J.K.Rowling. I think I will take credit for Kerensa and Seraphine but that’s it. I don’t even own the plot (to a certain extent)! That belongs to the makers of Hum tum, Kunal Kohli and Siddharth Anand and Yash Raj, I believe.
A/n: Here’s the next chapter. I have to admit, the downtime did do me some good. I caught up with a quite a lot of this story. Anyway, I’ve had time so I’ve tried to make this the best it could be. Have fun.
**6 months later- Hogwarts**
Six whole months flew by before their very eyes. And it had been six whole months since the infamous fight between Ginny Weasley and Harry Potter.
Only Ginny, Harry, Ron and Hermione knew what had taken place inside that compartment on the Hogwart’s Express. The rest of the school had to live on in suspense, well for a week or so anyway.
Six months was too long to dwell on one thing. Hogwarts had moved on. The fight was forgotten and the memory of Harry and Ginny’s friendship became nothing more than a fleeting memory.
For Harry and Ginny however, six months was not long enough.
Neither could do as their peers had done. They couldn’t forget the fight and found it even harder to bury the memory of their powerful friendship.
The impulsive fight was secretly regretted on both sides. Yet neither of them had the courage to take the first step and apologise.
Harry knew where he’d gone wrong. Kissing her was wrong, especially since at that time he was going out with Adella. And him and Ginny were on a strictly friends policy. He didn’t want to be anything more. And he definitely did not fancy her.
And yet Harry couldn’t figure out why he had kissed Ginny in the first place. He didn’t generally make it a rule to kiss people when they annoyed him. And he realised that if he had wanted Ginny to shut up, a silencing charm would’ve worked just as well.
Harry had gone back to the original trio. The only problem was, now that Ron and Hermione had started going out, he had become the tag along.
Harry hadn’t been subjected to the tag along status for many years and it got him by surprise when he realised. He spent time on his own when his presence was not wanted but Ron and Hermione weren’t entirely oblivious to their friend.
Ginny however had decided to become better acquainted with her dorm mates of six years. Although, she had always had a good relationship with them, she always regarded them as distant friends nothing too close and nothing too nasty, just good.
However, times got desperate and it seemed the only way to go about things to stop herself screaming and so this is where she was. Ginny had established her own little trio, no males just Ginny and two other girls by the names of Kerensa and Seraphine.
It wasn’t the same, it couldn’t possibly be.
Kerensa and Seraphine were nice girls and fun to be around and even though they were very kind and caring, they couldn’t understand her at times.
No one really could, it seemed. No one but Harry.
Harry had long since realised that brilliant though his best friends were, it was extremely difficult for them to comprehend his feelings and his outlook on a lot of things.
No one quite could, except for Ginny that is.
Their nightly conversations no longer existed. When you have the best one day and second best the next, it doesn’t quite feel right, does it?
The same held true for Harry and Ginny. When they lay awake at night, confused as to whether they should draw back their hanging and talk to their friends, something always held them back.
For Harry it was the fact that when he ripped his hangings it would be Ron who met him not Ginny.
For Ginny it was that she knew that if she ripped back her hangings it was Kerensa and Seraphine who would meet her not Harry.
They couldn’t be satisfied with Ron or Kerensa and Seraphine. Each wanted the other’s council and only theirs.
So when Harry woke up shouting and sweating and Ginny shrieked and her eyes flew open with tears streaming from them in the middle of the night, there was no one they could turn to.
It wasn’t easy.
Harry and Ginny tried their hardest to get over it and had attempted to use their six months very carefully. Harry had followed Ginny’s advice on that Hogsmeade trip and played the field.
His relationship with Adella hadn’t lasted very long after the Christmas holidays but they were still friends.
Since then, when Harry found a girl who sparked his interest, he would embark on a short relationship but all of them had turned out to be the wrong person.
Ginny had used her six months to think.
She had, after many many weeks of contemplation, finally realised what had upset her about the whole kiss incident with Harry, and why, when he’d said it didn’t mean anything, she’s felt even worse.
The truth was that though Ginny Weasley’s sixteen year old self was completely indifferent to Harry, her child self still existed somewhere inside herself. Some called it your inner child.
Ginny’s inner child still loved Harry. And it was Ginny’s inner child that day which had slapped Harry and then felt sick at his quick dismissal of the kiss.
She felt angry at herself for letting her inner child exist even though those feelings didn’t affect her at all and she didn’t particularly wish to pursue Harry in a romantic way at all.
Yet, annoyingly enough she couldn’t get rid of that little girl inside of her, no matter how much she wanted to.
Harry Potter was not a mind reader; he had no idea whatsoever of what had led Ginny to slap him that day. He knew he had been in the wrong but didn’t his little disclaimer make it all okay?
Obviously not, he used to think bitterly. The worst of it was that Ginny was intent on not speaking to him. Not that he tried but he could just tell.
When someone refuses to make the slightest bit of eye contact, there’s really no point in harbouring hopes of conversation, is there?
Well that was it. They were fast approaching the end of the year. The exams were over, the seventh years no longer had to worry about NEWTs because it was all over. No more exams to worry about.
Just a string of warm and carefree days, rather like June 28th of this particular year.
The unpredictable British weather had finally decided to welcome sunlight into its agenda. Just about every student was out roaming the grounds in their preferred way.
Almost all the trees had been taken up for shade. Some people were flying; others took part in casual games of Quidditch amongst their friends.
Ginny Weasley was taking part in the latter activity.
After much persuasion on her part, her friends had finally given in and decided to play Quidditch with her. Ginny had arranged two teams and they were having fun.
Mirabelle Woodhouse had thrown the quaffle in the wrong direction, giving Ginny the perfect opportunity to chase after it and put her own team in possession.
The quaffle however had other ideas, before Ginny could really go after it, it had managed to lodge itself in between the branches of a smaller than average, innocent looking tree.
‘Oh great!’ Ginny muttered, she turned around and shouted ‘I’ll go get it!’ to the others. She slowly flew over to the offending tree and tried to peer through the leaves.
Aha. There it was, she could see it now all she had to do was get it out. She carefully took one hand off of her broomstick and stuck it into the depths of the tree.
After a few seconds of fishing, she discovered there was no way that quaffle was coming out with one hand so the other hand went in too. A voice could be heard from behind.
‘Ginny, be careful’
Ginny rolled her eyes fondly and replied ‘I’ll be fine, Kerensa’ Then she went back to the task at hand.
That quaffle wouldn’t budge. Becoming more frustrated she forgot she was a broom and began to peer through the leaves again. Ah, there it was.
She leaned further, so that her torso was now accompanying her head and her arms, to grab it when suddenly her broom gave a lurch and she was thrust into the tree.
‘Aaaagggghhh’ she screamed and the sounds of branches snapping could be heard.
Then came an ‘ow, ow, OW, ow, ow’ as a large group of people in the air winced at every ow.
She landed on the ground underneath her in a flurry of leaves and sticks. Luckily, she hadn’t really hurt herself and had made it out of a tree with horrible scrapes on her arms.
Ginny was in a daze. How many people can say they’ve fallen through a tree?
It was certainly an experience, although in all her pain and astonishment she hadn’t realised that the hellish tree had people underneath it…until she heard voices.
‘Crap! I have witnesses’ she muttered, rubbing the back of her head.
The voice that sounded next caught her even more off guard.
‘Ginny?’ called Harry’s voice.
Ginny still felt dizzy, she blinked twice and stared at him.
‘Are you okay, that must’ve hurt’ he said.
Ginny looked at her arms. She looked up at him and jumped, at finally taking his face in.
‘You!’ she cried. She blinked again and shook her head.
Slowly, with the support of the tree trunk, she stood herself up. Harry tried to help.
‘Ginny don’t be stupid, you could’ve broken something’ he started
‘Don’t be an idiot, I haven’t broken anything!’ she said irritably, feebly trying to slap his helping hand away.
‘Even so Ginny, it’s not safe’ Harry persisted
‘Leave. Me. ALONE!’ Ginny screamed and then did what could best be described as an attempt to storm off but her legs were weak so she shook a little and made it rather easy for Harry to catch up with her.
She tried to walk towards the castle, as quickly as she could. Soon however, she felt a hand on her arm, spin her around.
She winced as Harry did this. But at facing him she noticed that he didn’t look apologetic but furious.
‘Stop it, you’re being an idiot. We have to talk anyway’ he said sternly.
‘No we do not. We have nothing to talk about, nothing!’ she yelled back.
‘Yes we do, what is wrong with you anyway?’
‘Oh! Wrong with me? What’s wrong with you? It’s all your fault I don’t want to talk to you, so don’t you dare try and make me!’
‘As if it’s all my fault. Yeah, I started it but it’s all your fault for blowing it out of proportion’ Harry shouted
‘Out of proportion!’ Ginny screamed incredulously
‘Yes that’s what I said! God you’re like a bleeding parrot!’ Harry said and immediately regretted it.
Ginny gasped and continued to swell with rage.
The two had, by now, attracted quite a crowd. The various onlookers had on expressions of incredulity, delight and shock and many girls looked offended on Ginny’s behalf. H
arry and Ginny, wrapped up in their argument as they undoubtedly were, had not noticed.
Ginny glanced over Harry’s shoulder (and unknowingly over a few people’s heads).
She was surprised to find a vaguely familiar blonde haired girl looking on in a rather scared fashion from underneath the tree from hell.
She was quite pretty with long blonde hair and stood at a nice height. An evil glint invaded Ginny’s chocolate brown eyes.
‘Oh got yourself a girlfriend have you?’ Ginny jeered.
The blonde haired girl looked surprised while Harry looked confused at the insinuation.
He spun around to see who it was, Ginny was watching. When he saw the other girl’s surprised face, he rolled his eyes.
‘Who? Grace? No, of course not! She’s just a friend. God, you’re so deluded’ Harry said defensively.
‘Oh! Well she’s in the most dangerous position if she’s a friend’ Ginny said and Harry feared what she was planning to do.
The redhead shouted to the girl called Grace.
‘I’d run away now, if I were you. I’ve been in that position. And if anybody knows how to screw up a friendship, it’s this prat right here’ she finished.
The girl was thoroughly flustered now as the audience craned their necks to catch a glimpse of her too.
Grace glanced from Harry to Ginny and then back again. Both of whom were fuming and rather a terrifying sight, put together.
‘I-uh…I’ll-I’ll see you around Harry’ with that hurried excuse, Grace ran away.
If Harry wasn’t furious before, he definitely was now.
‘Now look what you’ve done’ he shouted but Ginny merely shrugged her shoulders.
‘She’s better off without you, if you ask me’
‘She. Was. Not. My. Girlfriend. Get it into your thick head would you?’
‘Yes we’ve established that’ Ginny snapped back.
Harry sighed angrily and in a moment’s rush shouted ‘I hate you!’
Ginny felt like she’d been kicked in the stomach. Is this where she’d wanted it to go, to hatred?
She studied every inch of his enraged face. She stared hard at his emerald green eyes, her eyes flicked to his weakly masked scar and then to his mouth.
And then it all came back once again. That day, the train, that kiss, that slap. Soon she found herself becoming livid all over again.
‘Oh yeah? Well I hate you too’ she screamed to his face.
They stared at each other, each looking for a sign of regret. A hint of remorse for what they’d said.
The remorse was there but you couldn’t see it and they hadn’t felt it as of yet.
What am I doing? Coursed through both their minds.
And yet, they found they couldn’t stop, no matter how much they wanted to.
‘Fine!’
‘Fine!’
‘Fine!’
And with that the pair of them stormed off in opposite directions.
Ginny rather unsteadily headed towards the castle while Harry merely found a tree much farther away and sat himself down underneath it.
He watched their stunned audience disperse and begin to whisper among themselves.
‘Can’t mind their own business, can they? No they have to analyse ours’ he muttered under his breath.
‘Well you didn’t make it hard’ came a soft voice. Harry turned to find an unfamiliar girl sitting next time.
Well he thought he’d seen her around but not much.
‘Ummm, no offence but who are you?’ he asked the girl.
The girl smiled and held out her hand. ‘Sorry, I’m one of Ginny’s friends. Kerensa McCarthy. Who are you?’ she asked with a mischievous glint in her eye.
Harry stared. Not since the day he had met Draco Malfoy in Madame Malkin’s had someone asked who he was. They had just known, he was Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived.
He studied Kerensa McCarthy. She didn’t have a particularly special face nor did she possess any remarkable features.
Her hair could only be described as a dark blonde. Her eyes were fixedly brown; she had a splash of freckles over a pale face. She wasn’t bad looking and yet not particularly good looking either.
Girls like her were best described as plain faced.
But it didn’t matter. Harry was grateful that she wasn’t gaping at his forehead or questioning him about Voldemort and the best thing was that she wasn’t even acknowledging that she knew anything about him. With a grin he shook her hand.
‘Harry Potter’ he said, Kerensa looked mildly interested. ‘Didn’t you used to hang around with Ginny’ she asked again.
He almost laughed this time. ‘Yeah, I did’ he replied.
‘Mmmmm, yes I remember now. You used to be quite good friends, didn’t you?’ Kerensa said.
‘Yeah I suppose you could say we were’
‘Would you mind if I asked what happened’ she said quietly. Harry turned to look at her again.
‘Just some things, bit complicated’ he replied passively.
Kerensa nodded. ‘So what was that about?’
Harry had to think now. What had that been about? He couldn’t honestly say he knew. He still didn’t understand exactly what had happened in December, let alone this but he tried his best to reply.
‘We didn’t finish on the best of terms, last time we talked’ Harry explained vaguely.
‘Oh right okay’ and then they fell into a comfortable silence. Now it was Harry’s turn to question.
‘So why are you sitting here, shouldn’t you hate me as well?’ he enquired.
Kerensa smiled again, she had a nice smile Harry noted. Not because there was anything exceptional about it, apart from a dimple on one cheek, but it was because it was so reflective of her personality.
‘It’s Ginny’s fight not mine. And anyway, you looked more like a victim in that argument than Ginny did, even if she did fall through a tree'
Harry laughed ‘she hurt herself pretty bad though’ he commented.
Kerensa bit her lip. ‘Oh dear, d’you think she did? I didn’t get a proper look’
‘Yeah her arms had been badly scratched, they didn’t look pleasant’ he told her.
‘Oh no-’ but Kerensa was cut off by another voice. A very cool, indifferent voice.
‘Kerensa, where d’you think Ginny is?’ Harry and Kerensa looked up at this new person.
This girl seemed the exact opposite of Kerensa in that while Kerensa was plain faced, this girl was shockingly beautiful. Harry stared a little.
Her skin looked like mocha and she had tight curls of the deepest dark brown. Her eyes were electric blue and she had very high cheekbones and full, pink lips. Her body however, was tall and lean and while it was flattering, she didn’t seem to posses any curves to speak of.
Kerensa smiled at the girl and turned back to Harry.
‘Harry this is our other friend Seraphine Bonheur. Seraphine, this is Harry Potter’
Seraphine looked at Harry in a way to match her voice, indifferently.
Her demeanour and air was very different to Kerensa’s too.
Kerensa looked like she loved to smile; Seraphine looked like smiling was a waste of energy.
So was frowning apparently so she didn’t do that either, with the result that it looked as if her face was incapable of facial expression.
Kerensa gave off an air of caring about everyone and everything and seemed like one of those people who saw good in everyone.
Seraphine Bonheur possessed an intimidating air which said “I have better places to be but unfortunately I’m still here” and you could immediately tell that she cared for very few things.
Harry Potter was just not one of them.
She looked at him and nodded to which Harry could only nod back and then he found it very easy to look away.
She had a beauty that made you stare but only for a minute or so, it wasn’t particularly appreciable, you couldn’t stare at her for hours on end because you got bored. Her beauty was just painstakingly obvious.
‘So where do you think she is Kerensa?’ Seraphine said. Kerensa looked to Harry for an answer.
‘She’ll probably have gone to the Hospital Wing’ he said
‘Thanks’ the dark haired girl replied shortly and turned back to her best friend ‘are you coming?’
Kerensa stood up and waved to Harry ‘I’ll see you later’
‘Yeah you too’ he replied and then he looked at Seraphine and said ‘bye’
She stared back, hard, as if looking for something before curtly replying ‘goodbye’ and leaving with Kerensa in tow.
‘What an odd pair. So that’s who Ginny’s new friends are’ Harry said to himself before getting up and leaving for his dormitory.
***********
Ron watched his best friend slowly walk up to the castle with his head bent and his hands buried in his pockets.
‘What are we going to do with those two?’ he voiced, shaking his head. He felt Hermione’s head on his shoulder and looked down at her expectantly.
‘I hate to say this but it doesn’t look like there’s anything we can do anymore’ she said.
Ron raised his eyebrows in surprise.
‘This, coming from you?’ he said with a slight grin.
Hermione rolled her eyes and reluctantly said ‘yes, yes. Go on rub it in my face. I was wrong. But that argument just put an end to all my hopes’
‘You tried your best, even if you got it a bit, okay very wrong sometimes. You tried’ Ron said, Hermione sighed.
‘You know at Christmas, I really thought they’d be able to work it out, what with the presents and all but obviously…’ her voice trailed off.
Ron put his arm around her waist. ‘It’s okay, don’t worry about it’
‘You know that kiss probably meant more than we can know’ she commented
‘It must’ve done otherwise we wouldn’t have had to watch that’
‘They’re so meant for each other, I saw it. You saw it as well, didn’t you? There was something there, wasn’t there? Between them?’ Hermione asked hopefully.
‘There was, there had to be. Even I saw it’ Ron said truthfully.
She looked around at the other students. ‘I don’t care how much they deny it, they still care for each other, I just know it’ she whispered
‘Of course they do’
Hermione looked up at her boyfriend. ‘I’m going to go and talk to Ginny. See if she’s alright, I think she’ll probably be a little shaken’
Ron took his arm away from her waist and nodded ‘well she did fall through a tree’ he said fairly. Hermione’s face broke out into a smile at his comment.
‘Will you talk to Harry for me, make sure he’s okay as well?’ Hermione asked. Ron looked at her, communication wasn’t his strong point but he knew she really wanted him to say yes.
‘Alright, just for you, I’ll give it a go’ he conceded. she beamed and gave him a hug before waving and walking away.
***********
Hermione had been to the Hospital Wing to find it completely full.
After asking Madam Pomfrey she had been informed that Ginny had just needed some bandages and a dose of murtlap essence on her scratches and didn’t need to stay in the Hospital Wing so Hermione figured her red haired friend would be in her dormitory.
She reached the sixth year girl’s dormitory and paused at the door. She heard voices within.
‘Ginny, come on tell us what happened?’ came a throaty voice, Seraphine’s.
‘No!’ Ginny replied forcefully.
‘Oh Ginny be reasonable’ came a soft, shy voice, Kerensa’s.
‘No! Go away, I don’t want to talk about it’ Ginny snapped moodily.
‘Ginny, you’re being ridiculous. We are your friends and frankly I don’t feel like putting up with one of your tantrums at the minute so you had better suck it up and tell us right now or I swear Ginny Weasley, I will-’
Hermione decided to step right then and stop Seraphine from finishing her sentence.
The fuming girl fell silent as soon as Hermione stepped through the door. Three pairs of eyes stared at the newcomer expectantly.
‘Hi, sorry, am I interrupting anything important?’ Hermione asked.
Seraphine stared at her analytically. ‘No need to ask, you heard everything yourself’
‘Excuse me? No I-’ but Hermione was cut off by the blue eyed girl.
With the same offhanded and highly aggravating tone, she said ‘small tip Hermione. Next time you want to eavesdrop, tie those lovely thick brown waves up. I saw the edge of your hair round the door’ and with that she left.
Kerensa waved cheerfully and left the room too.
‘That girl! How does she do that?’ Hermione commented.
‘Oh she’s very detail oriented, notices everything. Try being her partner in Potions, it’s a nightmare!’ Ginny said.
‘No I mean, how does she make you falter with just a look?’
‘Ah that. It’s her specialty, she loves giving icy glares; it’s like a hobby for her’ Ginny replied casually.
‘Well it’s…disconcerting’ Hermione said uncertainly.
‘I’ll tell her you said that, she’ll be pleased. Are we done?’ Ginny said uninterestedly, playing with her alarm clock.
Hermione rolled her eyes. ‘No I need to talk to you about something else as well’
‘Mmmmm, go on’ Ginny said quietly, still fiddling with her clock.
Hermione stared at her and then the clock and then to Ginny and then the clock, hoping the red head would get the message.
‘Unbelievable!’ she cried.
Ginny looked up ‘what?’ she asked
‘You’re doing it again!’
‘Doing what?’ Ginny asked, returning to her clock. Hermione leaned over and wrenched the clock away from her friend’s hands.
‘Whenever I come to talk to you, you never look at me or pretend to even listen. You’re always messing with something. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were scared of talking to me’
‘I am not! And I don’t mess with things, thank you very much! Now, may I please have my clock back?’ she asked, holding out her hand.
Hermione laughed. ‘No you may not have your clock back. You will listen to me first and then I’ll give it back’
‘Okay but make it quick’ Ginny said stubbornly.
‘I just wanted to make sure you were okay, is all’
‘Uuhhhh I’m fine?’
Hermione sighed ‘Ginny! You know what I mean! Are you okay after the whole thing outside?’
‘Well for someone who just fell through a tree, I’m quite alright actually. Thanks for asking’ Ginny tried.
The other girl closed her eyes and took a deep breath ‘Ginny, please don’t be difficult. I’m only trying to be a friend’ now it was Ginny’s turn to sigh.
‘Yes alright, I’m fine after the whole scene with Harry and what not’ she said grudgingly, her friend nodded in approval.
‘Good’ Hermione said and then scrutinised the red head before her. ‘Can I ask you something?’
‘I suppose’ mumbled Ginny.
‘Have you figured it out yet?’
Ginny’s head immediately turned to the window.
She gazed out of it for a while before finally saying ‘yes’ then she looked back at her friend.
‘D’you want to tell me?’ Hermione whispered hopefully.
She stared at the brown haired girl for a second before sighing in a resigned manner. ‘You’re my oldest friend. I’ve told you everything else, haven’t I?’ she asked, although she already knew the answer.
Hermione smiled fondly and nodded.
‘Well only you would be able to comprehend this one –well I suppose, he, never mind- I might as well tell you’ Ginny said more to herself than anyone else.
She stayed quiet for another minute or two while Hermione waited expectantly and then she finally came out with it and told the other girl all she could.
After hearing what Ginny had to say about the entire situation, Hermione could only draw one conclusion. ‘Ginny, you like him!’ she cried adamantly.
‘No that’s the thing though. I don’t. I swear I don’t. I just used to and that bit of me won’t let him go’ Ginny explained but Hermione shook her head.
‘You can’t treat your, your…inner child, as you like to call it, as if it or she is a completely different person, she isn’t. She’s still you. And if she likes him, then a small part of you, must too, whether you want to admit or not’ she said wisely
‘But I don’t! I’m telling you I don’t! I didn’t feel a thing, until he told me it wasn’t anything. I just sort of stood there thinking “what the hell” for a moment, that’s all’
‘Ginny if you didn’t feel anything then what on earth was that outside? It wasn’t a pointless argument getting out of hand, there was more there, I could feel it’ Hermione said placidly.
‘I don’t know what happened outside. I mean I was angry because of the whole kiss problem and then I didn’t want to talk to him and then he tried to make me and then I sort of blew up I suppose’ Ginny said feverishly.
‘You missed out the part where you chased off a potential threat’ Hermione said in a bored fashion.
‘Oh yeah that. Hey! She was not a potential threat! She just needed to know’ Ginny cried.
Hermione rolled her eyes and said ‘Sure she did Ginny’ the younger girl groaned and ran a hand through her hair.
‘I can’t believe I said I hate him! That’s just one more thing he needs to worry about’ she complained, the other’s expression softened.
‘If it makes you feel any better, he said it first’ she said quietly. Ginny looked up at her friend.
‘Hermione, what am I going to do?’ she asked miserably.
Hermione hugged her and said ‘you just need to stop worrying. What’s done is done, there’s not much else you can do. Just wait and see what happens’
***********
‘Hey’
Harry turned to see Ron enter the dormitory. ‘Oh hey’ he replied passively.
Ron cleared his throat like he did when he needed to talk to Harry about anything related to feelings. Harry understood.
‘Hermione send you up?’ he asked, Ron nodded.
‘She really wanted me to, couldn’t say no’ he said, Harry laughed a little.
Ron cleared his throat again ‘so uh, what was that outside?’
Harry looked at his friend, who was trying to sound as casual as he could. He shook his head ‘Don’t have a clue’
‘What do you mean’ Ron asked in confusion.
‘I mean I don’t know Ron. I just lost control. I’m just-I dunno’ Harry finished and then for a minute neither spoke.
‘What have I done?’ Harry asked, pounding his fist on his bedside table. ‘I’ve completely messed everything up; we’ll never be friends again will we?’ he said more to himself than Ron, even so Ron answered.
‘Not for a long time I don’t think’ and he heard Harry frustratedly sigh ‘and I do mean long. Ginny knows how to hold a grudge’
‘You’re telling me’ Harry muttered.
Ron cleared his throat again ‘er why did you say you hate her. You don’t, even I know that. Why did you say it?’
‘I didn’t mean to say I hated her. I just-I was so angry and-I didn’t mean to’ Harry repeated.
‘But you did’ Ron said quietly
‘But I didn’t mean to’
‘It doesn’t matter what you did or didn’t mean to say, the point is that you did say it’
Harry sighed again’ ‘I am such an idiot. But why wouldn’t she just talk to me’ he said.
‘Well you didn’t exactly pick the best time did you, shed just fallen through a tree, remember? And no offence mate but she didn’t really have to talk to you. I mean this whole thing really is your fault’ Ron said fairly.
‘It is not my fault’ Harry cried.
‘But it is’
‘What’s my fault, that she over reacted and slapped me and blew it out of proportion?’
‘No that you kissed her in the first place. I mean, have you never heard of a silencing charm?’
***********
That night, Harry discovered that his inability to sleep properly had resurfaced. He lay there, looking straight up at the ceiling, fruitlessly trying to clear his mind of all thoughts.
He turned one way, that didn’t work. And then the other, no. He just couldn’t sleep. Everyone else was; if Ron’s vociferous snores were any indication.
Harry had managed to make this irritating habit of chasing away sleep disappear in those months during which Ginny and he used to have their nightly talks. Her reassuring words and comforting advice made everything so much easier.
And now, he didn’t have them anymore.
Much as he hated to admit it, Harry knew that being friends with Ginny was like a remedy.
It helped him sleep better, breathe better and generally feel better. Only she knew what he needed and when he needed it.
Like if they were still friends, he would probably go downstairs into the Common Room. He would call her name firmly up the girl’s staircase, five times (since her dorm was closest to the stairs and her bed was closest to the door).
Then he would wait ten minutes and turn to find her standing at the foot of the stairs, bleary eyed and wrapped in her duvet. Even so, she would readily sit down and listen to what he had to say.
He had no one to do that for him now. If he called Hermione’s name five times, there’d be no reply. And, if he called Ron’s, he’d either get an extra large snore or some sort of subconscious muttering.
‘Why can’t I think before I do something?’ Harry whispered angrily, to himself. ‘That’s how I killed Sirius…and now it’s how I’ve lost Ginny’ he muttered.
If Ginny were still speaking to him, she would’ve hit him for the first comment and shout at him for blaming himself for things that were never under his control.
Harry could just see it happening, he could hear her reprimanding tone. And of course, if he and Ginny were still speaking, the second comment wouldn’t even have crossed is mind.
Harry sighed dejectedly and repeatedly bashed his head into his pillow. As he did so, he quietly mumbled ‘where is she when I need her most?’
***********
A healer walks out, looking frantically about. Probably for Kingsley Shacklebolt but only finds a redheaded girl in not too peachy a condition herself.
‘Miss?’ the healer calls, the girl looks up ‘Yes?’ she answers hopefully
‘Miss Weasley, isn’t it?’
‘Miss Ginny Weasley, that’s right’
‘Where did Mr. Shacklebolt go?’ the woman asks, looking around once again. ‘No he’s gone to bring back any other injured ones’ the girl, Ginny explains
‘I see’
‘What’s the matter, is he alright?’
‘We generally like to inform a parent or a carer of some sort, first’
‘In this room, at this moment, I am the closest thing he has to family. Please just tell me. Will he be alright?’ the girl asks once again. The woman sighs.
‘Mr. Potter has lost a lot of blood; he’s broken quite a few bones and suffered a head injury. The fight obviously wasn’t easy on him-’ but she was cut off by Ginny.
‘Yes he only single-handedly defeated you-know-who, thus saving the fate of the world. I mean why wouldn’t the fight be easy?’ the girl snaps sarcastically.
The healer stares blankly at the redhead and chooses not to retort.
‘The point is, we’re trying our best but we’re not sure he’ll make it this time round’ the healer finishes sadly. The girl searches the woman’s face in silence.
‘So…you mean-’ she trails off.
The woman nods and looks away from the girl ‘yes. We stand at an undeniably high risk of losing him’
‘NO!’ Ginny shouted, her eyes flew open and she found herself, not in St. Mungo’s but in her dormitory.
She put a hand to her chest and could feel her heart pounding rapidly as she panted in fear. She looked around once again to make sure that she definitely wasn’t in the hellish waiting room.
‘Ginny?’
‘Are you okay?’ called two voices.
After a moment, she managed to calm down enough to feebly reply ‘I’m fine, go back to sleep’
After taking a few deep breaths, Ginny could finally begin to think rationally.
It wasn’t the first time, she’d relived that night. But it was the first time it had come back to in the last eight months. She’d known that very night, as she’d sat in St. Mungo’s, that that moment would haunt her for years to come.
But having Harry around so much of the time, so close to her, had helped her temporarily bury that memory.
Ginny remembered the last time she’d had that dream, September.
She was still speaking to Harry, obviously. He had told her to look at him and pinch herself, just to remind her that the dream didn’t mean anything. That night had passed and they hadn’t lost him.
“I’m alive enough to be talking to you, aren’t I?” he had said.
She could just hear him now and now she could see herself abruptly flinging her arms around his shoulders just to check one last time, like she always did.
Ginny sat up and let her head fall onto her headboard. God, she hated that dream. And there were so many to choose from. But that one, that one was in a league of its own.
Of all the horrible things that had happened to her, the one moment she couldn’t bear to relive was the one moment in which she’d thought she had lost him.
She could see herself, wordlessly fall into her chair as the healer went back inside.
Very slowly, one by one, the tears had started to fall. Then-
‘No! Stop it’ she whispered to herself ‘don’t get trapped in it again. It’s over. It was over a long time ago. Just stop’
It didn’t change a thing, it never did. She would continue to have that dream, continue to relive the fear and pain over and over and over again.
Except now, there was no one to bury it for her. Not anymore.
She sighed and called to the nothingness that enveloped her ‘Where is he, when I need him most?’
A/n: There you go. I hope you enjoyed it, I quite liked writing it. If you liked it, don’t forget to tell me, if you didn’t, same goes for you, tell me what you didn’t like and what I could do to change that.
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