Chapter 2 : Dishwater
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“Snape? Snivellus? No, absolutely not! This is some sort of joke. Tell me you’re joking.” Sirius was silent for a moment, waiting for her to laugh and admit that she was indeed kidding.
Camilla looked out at the snowy landscape. She wished with all her heart she was joking. “My parents couldn’t find anyone who wanted anything to do with me. I guess I have a reputation for being ‘unruly.’”
James gave a grim smile. “You are a bit stubborn,” he said.
“Maybe it won’t be so bad,” Peter said, patting her shoulder.
“How can it not be bad Wormtail?” Sirius snapped.
Camilla gave Peter a small smile. “He was just trying to comfort me, Sirius.”
The compartment became silent again. Camilla’s parents had broken the news to her just that morning, as they drove to King’s Cross Station. She hadn’t even had time to process the information herself before she was telling her friends. Their reactions had only solidified her thoughts that this was the worst possible thing that could ever happen to her. Lily hadn’t said anything; she had simply covered her mouth in shock. Remus, who was her best friend, hadn’t said anything either, though he did pale noticeably. Camilla hadn’t cried yet, but she knew she would. The moment she was alone, the tears would come. She didn’t want to cry in front of her friends. It made her seem weak. The only people who’d ever seen her cry were Remus and her parents.
Camilla wondered what her life would be like after June 31st. Her parents had agreed to a summer wedding. She had always wanted her wedding to be in autumn. Autumn was her favorite season. Secretly, she had always hoped to name her daughter Autumn. Now, she couldn’t. Well, she could, but the name would hold no meaning. Camilla was suddenly disgusted with her thoughts. How could she think of having children at all? Any children she would have would also be Snape's children and that just wouldn't do. She would just not have any kids at all. The thought made Camilla sad all over again. Everything she had always wanted, all her dreams, were never going to happen.
Camilla stood quickly. “I’m going to the front to get something off the trolley,” she said, pulling the door of the compartment open.
“Get me some chocolate frogs, will you?” Sirius called, as she began to shut the door.
Camilla waved to indicate that she had heard him and set off down the train.
She had needed to get out of the dead silent compartment. She knew they were all dying to talk about it, but didn’t want to upset her. That was fine. She could feel the tears burning and she didn’t want them to see her cry. Camilla felt the tears sliding down her cheeks. She desperately wanted to stop crying, but found that she couldn’t. She choked out a sob. She needed someplace she could be alone. She couldn’t bear to have anyone seeing her like this.
“Camilla! Camilla how was your break?”
Camilla froze. She especially did not want Darcy Rodman to see her crying. Camilla turned around slowly.
“Oh dear, you’ve been crying,” she said in a falsely sweet voice.
Camilla gave her a cold look.
“Perhaps I should I ask Severus to bring you out some tissues. I’m sure he’d be glad to, seeing as you’re his new fiancé.” Darcy paused waiting for Camilla to respond.
“Severus told us all about the arrangement your parents made with him. Did you know they are going to pay him a thousand galleons a year to keep you off their hands, not to mention he’ll get every sickle of your inheritance when they kick the bucket.”
Camilla gulped. She hadn’t known that. She scowled at Darcy. “Is that all you have to say?” she asked icily.
“We can’t wait to welcome you into our circle of friends, Cammie, I can call you Cammie can’t I?”
“I’d prefer that you didn’t.”
“Well, what does that matter?” Darcy responded with a cold smile, “Because now that Severus is in control of you it doesn’t really matter what you prefer.”
Camilla felt rage boil inside her. “No one is in control of me. I control myself, and if Snape thinks otherwise he’s in for a real surprise.”
Darcy smiled again. “You don't really believe that do you?,” she asked stepping closer to Camilla, "You poor thing. Severus will beat you down until you are a mere shadow of your present self… just as your parents asked, of course. And in ten years when you’re following Severus around and taking orders from him like a good pureblood wife should, I’ll look at you, smile, and say ‘I told you so’.”
Without thinking, Camilla raised her hand to slap the smug look off Darcy’s face. However, someone grabbed her wrist and threw her hard against the wall of the train. She winced. Her eyes were closed as she tried to erase the shockwaves of pain pulsing through her back.
“Don’t you ever try to lay a hand on my girlfriend again, do you understand me bitch?” a voice quite close to her spat angrily.
Camilla opened her eyes. She was staring into the brown eyes of Cain Holden. He had her pinned against the wall and it made her feel very awkward. He laughed. “Well if it isn’t Camilla Portman, or should I say Camilla Snape?” Camilla struggled to get away from him, but unfortunately he was much too strong for her to push him away. He laughed again, his eyes dancing mischievously. “Will you look at those eyes? Prettiest eyes I’ve ever seen,” he said softly, “Like a stormy gray ocean when she’s angry… and pool water when she’s not.” He laughed again. “What do you think Severus? Think you’ll be okay looking into those when you’re knocking her up?”
Darcy laughed hysterically at her boyfriend’s rude comment. Camilla sought to find somewhere else to look. She didn’t want to look into Cain’s eyes anymore. She felt like he could see inside her and it was discomforting. She heard Snape mumble something to Cain. She felt strong hands grab her face and her eyes left the patch of wall above Cain’s right shoulder they had settled on. Instead, Cain’s hands pointed her head towards Snape. She couldn’t help but glance at his face. He was staring intently at her, his black eyes boring into hers. If Cain’s gaze had been disconcerting, it was nothing compared to this. She averted her eyes. “What do you reckon, Severus? She’s certainly a looker isn’t she?” Cain asked conversationally, as if he often pinned girls to the wall and talked about them as if they weren’t there.
He probably does, Camilla thought.
“I don’t see it. She’s disgusting,” Snape said finally. Camilla’s head shot up.
“Ah, that’s only because she’s been doing a bit of crying and her mascara’s running. But, look. You’ve gone and made her angry. See, stormy gray ocean, just as I said,” Cain replied with a smile.
“Looks more like dishwater if you ask me,” Snape said coolly. Cain, Darcy, and another boy, who was standing near Darcy, laughed. Camilla felt Cain’s grip loosen just slightly and she seized the opportunity.
She pushed him hard with surprising force. He grunted as he fell back into his girlfriend. “I’m better looking right now than you will ever be,” she snapped at Snape as she shoved past him. She half expected him to grab her arm and throw her back against the wall like Cain had, but he didn’t seem to make any effort to stop her and she was able to walk back to her compartment without any sort of trouble.
Camilla opened the door to her compartment, walked in and shut it behind her. It was silent for a moment. “Where are my chocolate frogs?” Sirius asked.
“Oh I’m sorry I totally forgot. I’ll go back and get them,’ she turned back around to leave.
“No! Never mind, don’t bother. I’ll get them.” Sirius stood and gently squeezed her shoulder. Camilla sat in Sirius’ vacated seat.
Remus gazed at her. Then, with a small wave of his wand, he had conjured a washcloth. He reached up and gently wiped her cheeks with it. She had forgotten her messy face. The cloth was damp with warm water and it felt so comforting. She gave him a grateful smile. “You’re wonderful.”
He chuckled softly. “I know.”
Lily was watching her carefully as well. She put a hand on her friend’s knee and smiled. “You’ll get through this. I know you will. And you’re going to do it with that same old Millie spirit.” Camilla smiled at her friend’s use of her nickname.
“I hope so, Lily,” she responded softly.
A/N: Thank you for reading! I'd love to hear what you think about this chapter so go ahead and leave a review :)
Revised: February 13, 2007
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