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Harry Potter and the Mysterious Ham and Cheese by Wet Noodle
Chapter 1 : Harry Potter and the Mysterious Ham and Cheese
Rating: 12+Chapter Reviews: 9

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Harry Potter let out a great sigh as he closed his book and wrapped up the empty piece of parchment. He just couldn't focus his mind on writing his essay. Stupid potions. Harry set to packing his bag and once he was finished he snatched up his bag and headed upstairs.

His bed looked so comforting at this time of the early morning but he made sure he got to brushing his teeth first and remembered to take off his glasses....

There were piles and piles of odd paper all over the strange chamber. They were coloured pink and yellow and he vaguely remembered them from his slightly more muggle veered, childhood. Yes, construction paper, he used to make things out of it as a child.

He bent to pick up one of each coloured paper and turned them over only to fine the words 'ham' appear on the pink one and 'cheese' appear on the yellow one. As he looked around the room he saw the same words appear on all the other pieces of paper scattered through out the room. He found this very odd and was very surprised when a tall, skinny man dressed completely in black, from head to toe, walked into the room. The man picked up one piece of paper, per colour, and went to dancing around on his toes with them. He swayed from left to right, jumping in the air and crouching on the ground. Every so often he would grab a pile of these papers and throw them into the air. Then, just as suddenly as he had appeared, he was gone.

Before Harry could stop to think the scene before him suddenly changed, and instead he saw a runway in the distance. Surrounding that runway were many, many fold-up chairs all with human sized chunks of ham and cheese. Various chunks were holding flashing cameras, or clipboards and pencils. The next second a woman walked out from the curtains leading to behind the runway. He realised, after a second, that this 'woman' was Hermione. And she was sporting a dress made of pink and yellow pieces of paper, also labelled ham and cheese!! And again, this scene disappeared.

Next, the room was completely empty. The only people he could see were circles of Death Eaters. Harry felt a pang of fear shoot through him, then he realised that this was all just a VERY strange dream. Harry walked up closer to the circle and peered past two of the Death Eaters. They were circling around two figures. One of them was very plainly Lord Voldemort and the other, he was surprised to find, was himself! He glimpsed in just in time to see himself scream the killing curse. A huge flash of green light rushed towards Voldemort and, on contact, his body exploded into a showering of ham and cheese labelled pieces of construction paper!!

Harry awoke with a start, cold sweat dripping off his chin. He stretched out his hands in search for his glasses. He found them and put them on.
"What an odd dream," Harry thought to himself, "I'll have to be sure to tell Hermione about that."

Once Harry was downstairs he sat in between Ron and Hermione.
"Hey Hermione?"
"Yes Harry?"
"Well I had this dream just now. I think it may have something to do with destroying Voldemort!"
"Wow! That's great Harry. Please, tell me about it!"
"I'll tell you later. First, what's for breakfast?" Asked Harry.
"Well you can make sandwiches here. But there's not much left..unfortunately," said Hermione, rolling her eyes at a Ron with his mouth stuffed.
"Well, what is left?"
"Ham and cheese."

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