Chapter 1 : Salted or Unsalted?
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Things had definitely changed for Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley. Newly graduated from Hogwarts the trio (Hermione included) took on the real world. Hermione managed to get herself a highly regarded job (or so she says) in the Ministry of Magic working in the Magical Creatures department to hopefully improve interspecies relations. Ron and Harry thought otherwise. Harry had just missed out on a position in the Ministry’s Auror Training Facility. He had his name submitted for proposal next year when they would again be taking submissions.
Ron on the other hand had not amounted to so much preparation for after school. He was currently working at his brother’s candy store whilst he tried to sort out his priorities. With Hermione constantly hounding him about his choices in life and his brother’s constantly hounding him about whether or not he had filled all the candy barrels around the shop – things weren’t so pleasant for Ronald Weasely.
Although – things had certainly changed in their department since their last year of school had ceased. Ron had stated to Harry one night that he had indeed given up on the female species since they had certainly given up on him (not that they ever really began with him), and that he was indeed truly grateful for Harry’s friendship throughout the past seven years. Harry, who hadn’t had the most luck with women the past few years since his devastating break-up with Ginny, was also very grateful for Ron’s friendship. With this new perspective on how important one another’s friendship was, they vowed to stay together for the rest of their lives.
Only . . .
One night, things got a little too . . . close, and they’ve been ‘together’ ever since.
Today, we find them in the local shopping mart – picking their groceries for the next week. It appears that things have been a little tight between the two for the past week as they had been snapping at one another unexpectedly. Whilst strolling through the isles, they come to the bread shelves.
‘Wholemeal ok?’ asked Harry.
‘No. I don’t like wholemeal.’ stated Ron sedately.
‘Since when?’ exclaimed Harry.
‘Umm . . . birth! I swear – you don’t know me at all!’ Harry let out a large sigh at Ron’s outburst. He’d been like this for the past week and although Harry knew damn well that something was on his mind – he didn’t move to find out what it was. Sometimes, he didn’t even know why he was with Ron anymore!
‘No – sure, I don’t know you – I’ve only known you for the past eight . . . nearly NINE years!’ said Harry in a huff as he grabbed a loaf of white bread off the shelf, chucked it in the trolley and continued on pushing the shopping trolley down the isle. As they passed the spreads section, Ron reached for a jar of peanut butter.
‘No – I want jam.’ Harry stated snobbily. Ron shot a death glare at Harry and then grabbed a jar of strawberry jam off the shelf and tossed it in the trolley roughly. They continued down the isle in a stern and uncomfortable silence. It was when Harry reached for a packet of salted peanuts that Ron finally snapped.
‘I. WANT. UNSALTED!’ he basically yelled across the supermarket. Harry turned to glare at him before snatching the packet of salted peanuts from the shelf and chucking them in the trolley with a look of victory on his face as if to say –take that!- to Ron. Ron’s face slowly grew redder and redder. He reached into the trolley and grabbed the salted peanuts back out of it and threw them back at the shelf. He went to reach for a packet of unsalted peanuts when Harry had a go at him.
‘I want the salted ones – they taste better than the unsalted!’ he stated sternly as he reached out to slap the unsalted peanuts out of Ron’s hand. Ron glared at Harry again.
‘Well, I don’t want you to have the salted ones!’
‘Well why the bloody hell not???’
‘Because I think you’re getting fat!’ stated Ron snidely.
This comment hit Harry hard like Ron had just slapped him. Him! Harry Potter . . . getting . . . fat??? I don’t think so!!! What a ridiculous idea – especially coming from Ron of all people!
‘Well, thankyou Mr Love-handles!’ Harry yelled back at him. They were starting to draw attention from the other customers passing by. In noticing this – they both turned their argument into one of whispers.
‘Oh, that’s real mature!’ said Ron hissingly.
‘Well, what do you expect?’ said Harry in another whisper.
‘A little more sense from the man I love!’
Once again, Ron’s comment had left Harry stunned. He didn’t know what to think. Ron loved him? Really? Harry didn’t know how to react to this comment – so instead he just walked away leaving all the shopping with a stunned looking Ron.
Harry walked all around the shopping centre. Past the cat food items which reminded him that they had to get cat food for their Siamese called Snookims. Past the tinned fruit section which reminded him that they had to get some tinned pineapple for the pizza on Sunday night. Past the frozen section which reminded him that he wanted some frozen chicken nuggets – or would Ron think that they were fattening too?
Ron thought he was fat.
But Ron loved him.
Harry didn’t know what to think.
Did he love Ron?
As he was staring at the sliced ham section of the supermarket holding his box of cat food, tin of pineapple and box of frozen lite chicken nuggets in his arms, someone tapped him on the shoulder and broke him from his staring spot on the sliced ham.
It was Ron.
They stared at one another for a moment. Harry leaned forward and released his arms of groceries into the shopping trolley and then hung his head whilst he and Ron stood there in silence. A finger under his chin made him lift his head and look at Ron.
‘I’m sorry.’ said Ron quietly.
‘It’s okay.’ replied Harry just as quietly.
Again, there was more silence until Ron spoke again.
‘It’s just, I’m so stressed about this job business, with Hermione on my case and Fred and George constantly hounding me at work about whether I’m doing things right – I’ve just been getting really stressed and it’s all been coming out at you – I’m so sorry.’
‘No, it’s okay. I knew that there was something wrong, but I was too into myself that I didn’t bother to ask.’
‘I meant what I said . . . back there with the peanuts. I do love you . . .’ said Ron and Harry gave him a weak smile.
‘I think I love you too . . .’ he replied.
They leaned in towards each other to affirm their love to one another. They leaned in close and . . . Ew.
Okay – that’s where our story will end because it’s just too gross to even comprehend the idea of Ron and Harry . . . Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. EW!
So what do you think? About the peanuts that is. Salted or unsalted for Harry and Ron? You decide by dropping a review. Oh, and just so you know – I’m SOOOOOO against Harry and Ron or any other slash fan fiction – did I mention Ew? This was simply for fun because me and my friend (Puddle Jumper_88) thought it up one day and thought it would be amusing to imagine Harry and Ron dating and having a big fight in the supermarket about salted or unsalted peanuts because Ron thought Harry was getting fat! He he – okay, whatever!
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by Jenni Laine