Chapter 1 : one-shot chapter
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You laid in your corner watching. The shadows enclosed around you, but you still held onto the last few images of his life. Sirius was falling. Falling slowly and gracefully behind the veil. What you feared most became your reality. You forced yourself to get up and rushed over to Sirius. From a close distance, you can see him clearing. His face that was once handsome, now is nothing more than beautifully broken. You saw his eyes and you knew he was already gone. You push that fact past you. You refused to believe that Sirius would die this way. You reached out your bloodstained hand to grab Sirius before he slipped out of your life just like your parents did before. But it was too late. Sirius fell behind the veil and was swallowed by the darkness. You stood there looking into the empty darkness. You hated yourself for not getting to him on time. It's seemed like Sirius was falling for a long time, yet you didn't reach him. You refused to cry and you denied the fact that he was gone. You shouted his name behind the veil, hoping he'll hear you and to tell you that he's still alive. You heard quiet and distance whispers behind the veil. You know that he's alive. He's got to be. You tried to go behind the veil to get him, to bring Sirius back. But someone locked their arm around you, stopping you from doing so.
"Stop. Just stop." You heard Lupin's voice shouting from behind. You felt his arm tightened around your waist as you tried to struggle out of his grip.
"Sirius. He's behind the veil. He's just hiding behind the veil." You shouted at him. How can he be so clueless not to notice that Sirius was behind the veil. You just kept on telling him.
"Listen!" Lupin shouted at you. "He's gone. He's not behind the veil. Sirius is gone."
Your body began to shake. You felt sadness spread to you and the truth slapped you in the face. You wanted to cry, but you just can't. You slipped out of Lupin's grip and strolled over to the veil. You stood there watching. You knew the truth that Sirius is gone but you forbidden yourself to believe it.
One month had past since the day of Sirius' death. You stood in front of Sirius' grave. His coffin bared sorrow and inside was left completely empty. The sky darkened above your head as you watched the dirt compiled onto the coffin. You hated the DeathEater for what they did to him, but you hated yourself more for what you did to Sirius. You blamed yourself for his death. You led him to his grave. You refused to cry. Instead, you are angry with everyone. It's just not fair. Just not blood fair!
You listen to Dumbledore's speech. "He was more than a friend." Those last words hit your heart.
He was more than a friend to you. The closest thing to a father you had. He had risk his life thousands of times to save yours. Now Sirius is nothing more than a faded memory, soon to be forgotten by all. It's all your fault, all your fault that he died. You wanted to cry, so badly you wanted to tell someone how you felt. But you just can't let it out. Perhaps none of them knew how you feel. Sirius's death was all your fault and you only have yourself to blame.
"You'll be fine. It's going to be all right from here." Hermione told you and so did others. They all hugged you for support
They all believed you'll be all right. Maybe they are right.
After all, you are the boy who lived.
A savior to many, and a hero to all.
But simply you can't save the one you loved.
Remember Sirius. Sirius Black.