“What are you talking about?”
“Harry, this means that…”
“Harry, I … I … I might be having a baby” Is it just me or is this woman going insane? Or maybe I am!
“Harry! What happened to you? How can you be so darn thick? I might be having your baby!” she said with sadness and frustration in her voice. I slowly blinked, not comprehending what she had just said.
“Wh… What did you say?”
“I’m… going to have your baby…” (a/n – evil, ain’t I?)
I gasped in surprise and could feel my eyes going tired. I blinked away the rigid tears that I kept inside me. I was surprised and so infuriated with myself.
Why? Why did I do that? For one night I’m ruining my life, Hermione’s and Lavender’s. I put my hands on my head and I started taking small steps back. Then my eyes made contact with a table. I pulled my leg back and then kicked the table as hard as I could.
I could see Lavender shivering from fear. She’s never seen me so angry. And I was. I was so angry with myself. God damn it! Why the hell am I so stupid. Even now, when I’m telling you my story I want to beat myself up with a shovel. For one darn ambition of mine, to show Hermione that I can have a good time without her! With that I ruined all my hopes and all my dreams! I flew my fist back in the air and then I hit the wall as hard as I could.
“WHY? FOR ONE DARN MISTAKE!”
Lavender was frozen next to the door. I could see her hand on her mouth, shaking her head slightly, certainly not understanding why it had to happen to us.
I hit the wall once more and I could feel my fists soar from all that banging on the wall.
“Harry, I have to go” and with that she took off, running down the street, crying her eyes out…
I let myself melt down the wall with my head in my palms. I cried like that for a couple of minutes. I thought about everything. I felt torn from the inside… And some could ask “How could you?” How could I …
I got up miserably, rubbing the tears out of my eyes. I took a porcelain vase and hit it violently against the wall.
“WHY? GOD, WHY ME? WHY HERMIONE?”
Hermione doesn’t deserve this. Hermione doesn’t deserve me. She deserves so much better. A person that could lover her like I could never, a person that could be next to her every day, not a person that just slept with her best friend… And then realization hit me. Hermione.
She’ll be coming home in a couple of minutes. I ran to the bathroom, towards the sink and I let the cool water wash my fists that were slightly bleeding. Looks like I cut myself with a part of that vase. I wrapped my hand in a fresh towel and then let the towel fall down on the ground. And then I did the only thing I thought was logical. I grabbed my jacket and left the house. The air was rushing down my face, lingering on my skin, torturing me by entering my lungs. I deserved to die. I wanted to die. I wanted to throw myself in front of the Night Bus. And then I thought of running away. I slapped myself.
Harry James Potter! Are you going to run away from your mistakes? Are you going to leave your friends, your girl-friend and a pregnant woman? What would Ron think? What would Remus think? What would Sirius think? What would dad think? What would mom think? Remembering all that I care about made me hate myself even more. How could I think of running away? What has become of me? Then I did the only thing that made it’s way up to my wrecked mind. I went at Ron’s. The footsteps led me towards his humble, yet very nice house. I dragged my feet along and finally managed to get at the stairs.
I raised my fist to knock on the door and then I let it fall down once more. I was having second-thoughts about telling Ron this. What will he think of me? And I know that he had a crush on Hermione when we were at Hogwarts. But I know he is now happy with Catrisha, his new girl-friend. What will he think when I’ll tell him what happened? Would he tell Hermione? Surely he wouldn’t. He would let me. Would he spit in my face and stop being friends with me? I don’t know. But then, if I can’t tell Ron, WHO can I tell?
So I finally managed to knock on the door. I heard some mumbling and some footsteps leading to the door. It opened and in front of me was standing a wondering Ron who became a happy Ron.
“Harry! Didn’t know you’ll be coming!”
“Sorry on dropping by like this but I have to talk to you…”
His face took a nervous shape.
“It’s ok… what was it about?”
“Em… are you alone?” At this Ron became even more pale and his face looked grimmer than ever.
“Is it that serious?”
“Come in” and he stepped out of the doorway to let me pass. I walked in and seated myself awkwardly on the couch.
“Do you want a butter-beer, Harry?”
“No, that’s quite ok…”
“So what did you want to talk about?”
“Ron… I did something horrible and I came because I need your advice.
“What is it?” I could sense Ron getting more tensed with every passing moment.
“I…” I took a deep breath and continued “I cheated on Hermione…” Immediately Ron’s face fell.
“You what? With who?”
“With Lavender. We were drunk…”
Ron took his head in his palms.
“Have you told Hermione yet?”
Ron sighed deeply. I then started telling him the whole story. I saw my best friend become more and more pale. When I finished he looked like he had been to hell and came back to tell the story.
“Harry… how are you going to get out of this one?”
“I don’t know…”
“You realize you have to tell her, right?”
“Yes I do…”
“Well… I don’t know… I don’t think she’ll forgive you…”
“I know…” I said lamely.
“I say we go back home and try to think it all over. I can’t think with so many potions around.” Catrisha was a healer.
“ok…”. We both got up and walked toward the door and then up to my house which is a couple of blocks away. The entire road neither of us said a thing. Then we finally reached my house. I opened the door and I saw Mione. When she caught sight of me she threw herself at my neck
“Oh, my God, Harry! I thought something happened to you” she pulled away and looked into my eyes. I didn’t understand anything but the guilt was too much so I turned my gaze away.
“I saw the towel full of blood and the broken vase and the shattered table and the marks on the walls. Harry, there were thin strands of blood on the walls. And then I saw you weren’t at home… Oh, my God! I’m so glad you are ok!”
She hugged me again strongly and I held her close to me, not wanting to let go of her. She brushed a strand of hair out of my eyes and she looked into them lovingly and gave me a small kiss. Ron stood aside watching the entire scene, not really showing any signs of life. Mione looked at me once more and then a frown appeared on her face.
“By the way, what happened? What caused all this?” Everything fell silent. The only thing I could hear was Hermione’s breathing. Everything was tense around me, including Ron who had a deep frown on his face.
“I… It was only…”
A/N Ain’t I just hateable? :)))) Ok, folks, that was another chapter with another cliffie. And just for the record, all chapters will end with a cliffie. Don’t you just adore me? Anyhow, thank you all for all your reviews. I want you to know I appreciate them all. And I won’t be surprised when I’ll find you at my door with torches and shovels in your hands, ready to beat me up till I start barking.
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